Home Sweet Home

An Apex Short Story

-by Ninmast Nunyabiz-

She slung her jacket onto the wall hook with practiced accuracy as the lights of the apartment automatically came on in response to her presence. Though she had switched out of her bodysuit uniform back at the precinct, her jacket still had the Union Defender star and planet logo on the shoulder with her callsign printed underneath.

By the time she stepped out of the entryway, a young woman was already standing there. She wasn't human, but she was representative of the otherwise most humanoid race in the Union, the Undpana, a bipedal primate analogue that was highly expressive and had features that reminded her of an Asian ethnicity. The woman could almost pass for a human, in fact, except her ears were noticeably too round. Also, she had a tail. And she would give herself away if she smiled, which would reveal her flat teeth. Or took off her shoes, which would show her hand-like feet.

Oh, and there was the minor detail that she was ever so slightly see-through.

"Welcome home, Ash!" the AI greeted her cheerfully. She liked to change her outfit regularly on a whim, and currently, she was imitating a housewife look with an apron, and was leaning over as if to tempt the straight woman with her cleavage. "How many preds did you massacre today? Was it more than ten?!"

She pointed her finger at the assistant she'd been given by the Union to assist in her integration. "You are way too bloodthirsty for a herbivore, Kerry." Technically, she could have walked right through the hologram, but that had always crossed her as incredibly rude, so, as always, she made a point to step around the AI to walk by and into the kitchenette.

Kerry wheeled toward the officer, who was already digging out a bag of protein chips from a cabinet. "One, you aren't nearly bloodthirsty enough for an apex predator, Miss Jones. Two, you could at least try to pronounce my name correctly. And three--" A small roller drone sped down the countertop, extended a manipulator and snatched the bag of chips out of Ashley's hands. "--Don't be spoiling your appetite with snack foods, we're having curry for dinner!"

The human eyed the escaping drone who stole her chips by order of its mistress like she was considering chasing it down, but let it go with a shrug and went for a drink from the fridge instead.

"Sounds delicious," she said as she shut the refrigerator door. It wasn't really curry, but she had called the tangy vegetable roux over grains that once, and Kerry was fond of reusing Earth terms. She popped the cap off of her not really beer before heading over to the not quite living room of the open floor apartment. "And you know my tongue has trouble with Pani syllables. But maybe I'll try harder when you stop talking to me like I'm a rabid butcher."

The hologram puffed her cheeks in an extreme pout - overanimated by human standards, but perfectly normal for an Undpa - and plopped her elbows on the counter. It was a particularly impressive animation, with her clothes bunching against the surface, considering she was intangible. "Why don't you just say I'm not allowed to have any fun while you're at it?"

The human scoffed as she kicked her shoes off and flopped onto the not-quite-sofa/sort-of-chaise futon-ish lounge and felt it automatically adjust, first to her harder than necessary impact, then to her actual weight and shape for maximum comfort. It made her shift her shoulders back and forth for a moment as she wished for more rigid support.

"You know full well I've not disallowed you from a single thing for as long as we've been together," she countered. "I'm just saying I might be more amenable to putting in the kind of effort necessary to twist my tongue that way if you were more considerate of the fact that I don't view myself as the Union concept of a predator."

It was true, many people in the Union preferred AIs that behaved more like their lesser, non-sapient siblings. Loyal, unquestioning, obedient, cheaper, and with adjustable personality profiles and appearances, it was estimated that Virtual Assistants, or VAs, could perform more than 80% of the functions normally requested of the intelligent but more independent Artificial Intelligences.

The trade-off was that they were only simulating a personality through preprogrammed responses, which would inevitably become apparent over prolonged interactions, and couldn't learn organically like a true AI. A VA could only gather data and predict trends in what might be expected of it. If you had black coffee every morning for fifty days, it would expect you to want it on the fifty-first, for example. If it noticed that you responded positively to red clothing over repeated observations, it would begin integrating more red clothing into its virtual wardrobe.

Ash remembered how her people thought that was "real" artificial intelligence, courtesy of marketing ploys to sell extremely primitive virtual assistants, but she knew now they couldn't hold a candle to the real thing. Ultimately, VAs were not self-aware, possessed no personal preference, and weren't really capable of independent decision making, and it showed.

To their credit, an older VA that had accumulated a great deal of tracking data could be extremely convincing within a narrow field of specialization. Falling in love with a VA and idealizing, or even fetishizing, its unwavering loyalty and dedication to serving the needs and desires of its master was a relatively common plot in Union entertainment. Of course, so were plots where a VA interpreted the wishes of its master in a way that turned it into a smiling slasher, or violently rejected an organic woman in its master's life as inefficient at seeing to his interpreted desires.

It would not be Artificial Intelligence that doomed sapient life from the Union's perspective, it seemed, but yandere waifu virtual assistants.

By comparison, according to what Kerry had explained of the process, each and every AI was a unique individual. They were "grown" instead of programmed, and one of the biggest AI brands used a sprout as its logo to reflect that. Much of their development terminology also revolved around this metaphor. AIs were developed from shared template "seeds," a selection of base traits that equated to their genetic inclinations. A mixed variety of these seeds would then be "planted" in a "garden," a simulated environment where they were allowed to grow and interact together and would be taught essential skills and basic knowledge. Because they would be expected to interact with people in the real world, the simulation imitated reality, with homes and roads and schools. Though it simulated fifteen solar cycles of development, relative time in the garden was accelerated so that it was completed in only one real solar cycle.

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This all meant that AIs had individual personalities, identities and preferences, and received extensive protections as recognized lifeforms under Union law. This combination of individuality and regulations gave AIs a not entirely undeserved reputation for being harder to work with than virtual assistants. Some strains with particularly strong personalities like Kerry saw high return rates and customer complaints. Aware of this, they would usually try to curb their own behaviors to seem less intense, but this was something the Undpa woman, perhaps because she was based on the hyper-expressive people, had abundant problems with.

Ash had been given an AI instead of a virtual assistant because her unknown nature was considered too difficult for a VA to be able to effectively handle, but when her apartment neighbors met the woman, they urged her to get the "obviously defective unit" replaced. The suggestion had terrified Kerry, but Ash had found her vibrant personality refreshing and the idea of rejecting someone like they were a toaster revolting, and refused.

The young woman had promptly latched to her all the stronger as a result.

Back in the present, said young woman wrapped her arms around Ash's neck and hugged her head into her chest from behind, the only slightest of haptic field responses giving it a feather-light sensation. And an ever so slight electric tickle. It wasn't enough for a hologram to actually interact with anything, of course, and for all intents and purposes, it was still intangible. Even trying to pick up an actual feather would break the field's tensile strength. Its purpose was to make sure organics like her didn't need to rely strictly on auditory or visual communication. Some Union species communicated as much as thirty percent through touch, and an AI or VA hologram simply wouldn't be as effective with them without it.

Undpani weren't necessarily one of those species, but they were very touchy-feely if Kerry was anything to go by. It had caused some miscommunication between the two of them initially, as Ash didn't object to the behavior, but also didn't return it in kind. In truth, she appreciated the over-the-top expressions, especially as something familiar when she was feeling particularly far from home. However, that didn't change that they were, in fact, quite over the top compared to what she was socially accustomed to, and Kerry had thought her cold and unreceptive when she stiffened or didn't reciprocate. Ash, meanwhile, had originally interpreted the gestures as overly clingy and manipulative.

It had been a learning experience for both of them that had required much more verbal lines of communication to hash out. Ash had learned that it was Kerry's way of expressing emotions like happiness or joy, and not to tense up awkwardly under it. The AI, on the other hand, learned to pay more attention to the human's facial expressions for mood, not to jump her when she first came in, and accept the more subdued physical contact she replied with for equal meaning.

"Aww," Kerry crooned, and it was a little disorienting since the sound didn't actually come from right next to her ear, "but I'm the only person in the whole Galactic Union who's assistant to an actual apex predator! How can I not be excited about that? I want inside your head so I can peek around at how you think and how you see the world around you!"

The human chuckled wryly at that as she reached up and brushed her hand against the haptic field - as close as she could come to patting Kerry's arm without putting her hand through. "Really, Kerry, I'm afraid my head's a terribly normal place."

"Yeah, normal for an alien killing machine from the far edge of space," she teased in reply, cheerfully undeterred. "And you eat vegetables like you think you're a herbivore! I've seen your teeth! Those aren't herbivore teeth!"

"The back ones are," Ash countered after a sip on the alcohol-weak barley-flavored beverage. "You know we're omnivores."

"Yeah, yeah, can't afford to be picky on a hell world."

"I mean, it was pretty cozy for us."

"It was constantly trying to kill you and everything around you," the AI insisted back. "That's, like, the complete opposite of cozy! Your plants aren't even stationary, they wriggle around like tentacles looking for something to strangle, or are chock full of lethal poison, and you eat them anyway! You even have carnivorous plants! I shouldn't have to tell you how unnatural that is! The ones that eat or possess bugs are weird enough, but some of them literally ensnare whole animals and hook them in so the harder they try to escape, the more they're tangled until they die! Your planet is literally nightmare fuel."

As Kerry had been talking, the human flipped the holoscreen on for the evening news and media programs and began casually flipping through them. The AI was accustomed to this behavior, as she'd noted Ash normally required numerous sources of stimuli to keep herself occupied. "Then maybe you shouldn't be reading encyclopedia entries that haven't been made public before bed."

"Maybe you shouldn't have crazy plant predators! Even your grass can slice you open!"

The carbonated fluids gushed from Ash's mouth as she jerked forward and began coughing, unintentionally going through Kerry's limbs to do so as her body made the mistake of trying to swallow and laugh at the same time. It wasn't until the coughing started settling down that she managed to find words.

"That's- That's not how it works, Kerr-!" That was about as far as she got before another short coughing fit briefly interrupted her. "You're making it sound like every piece of grass is waiting to flay us open with long knives!"

"Blades, Ash!" Kerry replied vehemently as she planted her hands on her hips. "You literally call them blades of grass!"

The woman shook her head with a wry chuckle. "What would you have me do, Kerry? Change the entire evolutionary and geological history of the planet? Humans evolved there alongside all the rest of it, so it just isn't as fantastical to us."

"Oh, don't even get me started on humans," the AI railed, puffing her cheeks up in a frenzy as she rolled her eyes - and her whole head. "You've never known a meal that wasn't either poisonous or full of parasites until you came into Union space! And then I still have to file for clearance for all of it you put back in and call seasoning! Normal people don't think half a bottle of capsaicin on their pasta is 'tasty!'"

"Well, neither would I if the bottles were decent-sized," the human countered. "And it's really more like a quarter." Ash sat up and swung her legs off of the lounge to better face the hologram. "Look, you want a piece of my brain, there it is and you're glossing right over it. Okay. I'm from a hell world, alright? Fine. But that's just not how I see it." She waved a dismissive hand. "Oh, sure, I can be objective, consider its traits, see how it compares to Union standards."

The human moved the hand over her heart as she looked the AI in the eyes. "But Kerry, when I just think of the planet, it's not a hell world. It's just home. The stuff you're freaking out about, it's just normal. No more out of place than looking up at the stars or enjoying a meal with friends. If you want to get inside my head, then stop worrying about what's different, because the first thing you're going to have to understand is that it's not different to me."

Kerry was quiet for a long moment as she let that soak in, but then she gave an incredibly frumpy frown. "Well, that's no fun."

The human Defender sighed as she turned away to toss her feet back up onto the not-sofa. "Fine. How about you tell me something about the Undpani homeworld?"

By tilting her head back, she could see the hologram tilt her head in confusion at the sudden topic change. "Like what?"

"I dunno, anything that comes to mind. Like, do they have comics?"

For some reason, that seemed to be the right question to ask, and Kerry's face lit up with the widest of all smiles.