Author’s Note: I had to go back and scrap out a bunch of chapter 15 because I moved the story in what I consider a stupid direction. This is not cannon, but The Twilight Zone. Maybe this is what the MC dreamed about while unconscious. This starts right after our MC collapses after having slurped up the red demon slushy.
***
“What do you mean a system error?!”
“Sir look, that is what is coming up.”
“Move over idiot.” The technician quickly scrambled out of the way.
“Why…what on….gods above. Hmmm.”
“What is going on?”
“Some idiot decided to have a quest chain involving demons and penalties for slaying them. Then there is a blood transfer effect in place allowing inheritance using a ritual bowl. Unfortunately, no one tested a combination. The player is caught in a limbo. He can’t be penalized, but at the same time the ritual cannot complete. Now the system is devoting more and more processing power in an attempt to solve this paradox. It is already at 0.000125%.” A screen popped up showing the slowly increasing percentage, more techs came over.
“So what now sir?”
“Not state restore, won’t purge the system. We just delete the character.”
“Um, we can’t do that. Only the CEO has executive authority to delete-“
“Then get his ass on the line…NOW! Move it. Where was I, delete the character, might work. But the error is still in the active processing queue. Hmmm.”
“I got the CEO on the line.”
“Don’t need him anymore, tell him to fuck off.”
“Ummm.”
“Quiet, I am trying to stop a crisis here. Hmmm, that should work.”
***
I shook my head and woke up. I was still in the vault and should here lots of banging going on outside the steel door. I shook my head trying to send the pounding headache away. Stupid banging wasn’t helping. I opened up my status windows.
Experience+60001+10 LvL
NOTIFICATIONYou have slain a Waking Demon
ERROR
ERROR
ERRORSystem ERROR detected, please stand bySystem ERROR, Status effect cannot be appliedSystem ERROR, Status effect cannot be appliedSystem ERROR, Quest status compromisedSystem ERROR, Primary buffer node, rerouting, please stand by
That wasn’t good. A figure suddenly materialized in front of me. They were dressed in pure white with gold trim, an admin. Only a single screen shot existed, and no one had ever managed to get one to appear. “Hey what just-“
He waved his hand and I was lifted into the air and frozen in place. “I apologize, but you have created a system loop. The only way to resolve the loop is to remove a key component.” A wicked looking device appear in his hands. “The system will eventually collapse from the paradox you have created. After looking at any number of solutions, the simplest one is to remove all your blood.”
This had gone from bad to worse to really bad and was now at bat shit insane. “Why can’t we just wave our admin wands or reroll the program you ask. Well the entire game is in a steady state, it can’t be saved or reversed. The computing power just to process everything, hold on let me start this up.” The giant drill looking device he was holding began to gesticulate wildly.
“As I was saying, there is just no way to create a backup and run the game at the same time. Anyways, we can’t purge the primary buffers either, that is a whole other nightmare. That leaves the only options being deleting your character, which wouldn’t necessarily remove the problem from the system. Or we can extract all your blood and then burn your corpse to make sure this avatar can’t come back and then prioritizing your death to the top of the queue to remove our paradox. Don’t worry this issue will be fixed in a couple of days.” The device began moving towards me.
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“Tough breaks, I know.” A chime went off. “One second. Yes, but…. I was just about…There is no time….The Doc is going in? Fine, I will pull out.” The admin turned back to me. “Saved by the powers that be, you are quite lucky.” Legal Bob suddenly appeared.
“Sorry for the inconvince, here is a form resolving Omnitrek of any recent difficulties you just faced and to hand all recordings of anything involving our staff.” I suddenly dropped to the floor.
“Oops, you just follow Bob here and-“
“Bullshit, compensation. Give me demon powers.”
“Ummm, that isn’t a-“
“Demon powers.”
“I can’t alter the game in that way.”
“I am ready to begin.”
“Shut up Legal Bob. This is bullshit. I killed the demon, drank its blood. I want powers.” The admin let out a long sigh and face palmed.
“Alright, let’s see. Hmmm, I can give you this.” With a flourish he pulled out a dagger.
“What special powers does it have?”
“It is the first dagger of Adminus and-“
“Just a normal dagger.”
“Hmm, well it looks like there are a bunch of people trying to get in here. I may be convinced to teleport you out.”
“Him as well.” I pointed at Ulther. “And anything I can take with me.”
“Yes, yes.” I grabbed up the pen Bob was holding and signed away. Bob faded away. “You got a minute.” I raced to the nearest shelf and swept all the gems into my bag along with a bunch of coins. I then grabbed Ulther and went over to the demon corpse and grabbed him up too. God, this was so heavy, I could do it.
“One Portal for you.” A glowing circle appeared in the air leading out into a frozen wasteland. I looked at the admin. “Fine, no frozen wasteland, Portal.” The first portal disappeared and a second appeared a moment later. All I could see was the end of the hallway. “I hope we never meet again.”
I dropped both the corpse and Ulther next to me and drew my swords. I slashed at the admin. The first blade hit his white, gold trimmed cloak and stopped.
IMMORTAL OBJECT
All damage and status effects are canceled out
My second blade bit into the side of his head. I wanted demon powers, not a stupid portal to some place that was probably Lady Breckley’s sitting room. The man screamed and I slammed the blade that had been deflected on his cloak down on his neck. His scream was cut off along with his head.
As blood sprayed out of the neck it was interesting to note how the outfit stayed where it was and the blood slid off it like oil on water. I wiped my swords off on the demon’s corpse and sheathed them. The portal had also snapped shut as well. I then reached out for the admin’s outfit, my hand stopped an inch away. My hand refused to move any closer to it no matter how hard I tried.
I was not to be deterred. I dumped all the stuff in a crate out over the floor and then dragged the crate over. I then got on the crate and reached above the outfit down onto the decapitated neck. Yes I could touch that. I was able to touch one side of the white outfit, but was repelled from the other. The outfit covered the entire body, except for the head and the hands. The long pants flowed over the feet. It also wouldn’t budge in the slightest when I pushed on the outfit from behind.
I looked over at the door and saw it was being pushed out of its frame. Someone really wanted all this treasure. I was screwed. I was fairly confident I wasn’t going to get another admin to come help me. No demon help either.