I was cleaning the bathroom stalls when it happened. I had been working part time at university for six months. Miserable salary, but a drop out without financial support gotta do what a drop out without financial support gotta do. God, I hated this job. Cleaning rich kids toilets is not exactly what I had envisioned for my future. I don’t think it is anyone’s dream anyway. Right ?

Nonetheless I was there, third stall, west wing second floor bathroom, 18:00 PM on the 4th of May, scrubbing casually, when a hand came out of the freshly flushed toilet bowl and grabbed me by the arm.

Next thing I remember, I was diving head first in the porcelain throne... Then I was drowning.

I can’t say I have tried them all, but I’ve got a vast imagination, and drowning might be one of the worst ways to die. Slowly sinking to your end, submerged in dark water, looking at yourself helpless, unable to breathe and bound to die, for two or three minutes.

That’s not what happened to me though. I came out of the water straight like a rocket, in what seemed to be a bottomless vortex composed of the wildest and purest energies. As I span and spun again at a speed defying all the laws of physics, held by an unknown arm, I could not help but think of a single word: “shit!”

***

Meanwhile, at the heart of the Antekosmos, in a remote wind farm miles above the eastern wilderness, a young woman in her mid twenties was giving birth for the third time of her life. Her green eyes reddened by a sleepless night of hard work, her shaggy brown hair scattered across the bed, she had long surrendered to the worst pain a child can cause an adult. Something or someone was twisting, gripping and pulling her insides in the most uncaring and savage manner.

Twice before she had gone through labor, and twice it had just felt like slightly stronger menstrual cramps. This time it felt wrong, disturbing, baffling, and goddamn excruciating.

The pain had taken her by surprise. She had been repairing one of the old wind pumps when a peculiar vibration had spread all over her body, from navel to extremities. An instant later, she had found herself struck to the ground, half unconscious and surrounded by the blurry faces of her worried colleagues. In the minutes and hours that followed, her body had decided to sample all the different pains it could experience. Her belly had bloated like never before, the next second her gums had been bleeding, and not long after, she had heard someone point out that her veins had popped out.

She thought the worst had come, when her entrails had started moving by themselves and a severe migraine had almost knocked her out. Yet from that point onward, the symptoms had only intensified and diversified.

Among all of this, the most shocking had been to learn that she was actually nine months pregnant. Had she been in denial the whole time ? Probably not. It no longer mattered... Now, she was pushing and fully aware of it. It almost felt satisfying, meant to be, and she could at last hold onto the promise that it would soon end.

The old midwife next to her looked even more exhausted. She was a sort of magwyd; a healer, a mage, a guide for the lost souls. She had been chanting, praying and emptying the little magic she had on her to relieve the lass. Her hoarse voice had kept speaking words of encouragement while her trembling wrinkled hands were trying to probe for heartbeats.

In a dark corner of the room, a pair of even darker eyes were locked on the miraculously round belly. How did it come to be ? A frantic thirty years old man still wondered as he sat on a simple stool. How could his wife’s abdomen, flat the day before, have risen like dough over the course of a single day ? What on Mundus could have explained what they were anticipating at this very moment ? And who the hell was the father ? His mind was racing towards a million irrational conclusions. The woman he loved was in pain, and none of today’s events made sense.

A shriek snapped him out of his reverie. Then a shout. “Here is the head, keep it up Girda !”

The man dropped the linen he was holding and jumped to his feet. As he passed by the window, his face, revealed into the daylight, wore a mixed expression. His muscles were tense, his skin lined and tired, but his black eyes were shining with excitement, or was it curiosity, or was it something else... He came closer to the action, his legs feeling unusually heavy, the sound of his loud steps only covered by the cries of his wife.

“Come on Girda, just a few more” said the midwife.

The wife moaned, a wet head popped out, and the rest slowly came out, little by little. A few seconds later, the magwyd was holding the healthy breathing newborn and handing it to the man.

“Congratulations, it’s a girl,” she told them softly. “Now you cut the cord, Adrig ! But be careful with it. I need it as part of the payment, remember."

She turned towards the worn out lass and whispered: “You are doing great dear. Are you ready for the next one ?”

***

"General, here we are again. After ten years of battling and questing, we did it. Can you imagine ?"

I did not answer. The realization came to me a while ago. Our journey was ending. We had prevented the fall of the empire, we had restored the relic of saint Obrad and our oath was now fulfilled.

I could not help but reminisce on the past. The men standing behind me, the scars on my skin, the tears on my face, the blood on my hands, everything felt so heavy. I held the spear towards the skies and tried to channel its power one last time. I had to break our connection. My energy was slowly drained as magic bolts started to race around its head. I took a deep breath.

"You're free Gerlance." The words came out as I threw the overcharged sacred weapon as far as I could into the lake it once came from.

Standing on the small boat, I watched as the spear flew for dozens of meters before diving into the water and disappearing.

I was free.

I turned towards Octim and instructed, “let’s go home Lieutenant, our job is done."

“Yes my lady," he acquiesced. “Men row ! To Costillac !”

I looked up to the sky where rays of sunlight attempted to pierce gloomy clouds. "That's my silver lining," I said, hoping it was a sign.

I smiled for a second or two, then sighed. I sat, my back stiffened, my knees aching. For the first time in years I would finally lay down, stay home with my Leonim, and watch our daughter grow. Damn how I missed them. How I missed my Costillac. What many took as an impregnable cliff fortress, the gate to the empire and light of the strait of Whitepasse, I only knew as my home. Everyday I was reminded of it by my soldiers’ shields. They proudly displayed the coat of arms of my family. A gray fortress on a white cliff, facing the white pharos on an indigo sea above three words: Watch, protect, guide. A simple blazon paled in comparison to the real sight, and it only made me long for it more.

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While rowing, one of the soldiers asked his mates: “What do you think will happen to the sacred spear ? Will it ever come back ? How does that even work ?"

"Who knows Philirim, it is Gods' work, ask a priest, not us !" answered another one, Marcus was his name.

“Why is it always so taboo and mysterious ? General, out of all people, I refuse to believe that you don’t know !” protested Philirim as he turned towards me.

I sighed, “I have no idea Phil. I could wield the spear, that’s all. I too wondered at first, but there is no logi— ," A deafening blast interrupted us. A massive bolt of raw energies struck the water a hundred meters behind us. First my ears started to bleed then my vision became blurry. Or was it the contrary ? It went too fast. The small boat shook in every direction, the previously still surface of the lake was torn, opposing currents formed as two massive waves rising out of nowhere came crashing against one another.

We tried to hold onto the boat, getting a firm clasp over whatever we could. Philirim lost his balance and his grip, flying towards me. In the panic of the moment I tried to react and catch him but I was disoriented, too slow, or too scared. I ended up dodging him instead. I saw his eyes full of despair a second before he disappeared in the stormy waters. In horror, I watched him sink in what seemed to be the start of a maelstrom. ‘We are doomed," I thought to myself.

This giant whirlpool sucked the small boat inside of it. The men had long stopped rowing. It would not have mattered anyhow, as our speed grew so fast, that soon I felt my head spinning. We had no control. I could not hear anything anymore. The boat capsized.

I managed to hold onto a rope, but I was probably the only one to do so. It did not change anything, I got washed over by the raging currents and sent into the abyss. It was deep. Ten times deeper than the lake itself. “How is it possible ?” I pondered.

I soon realized that we had been pulled in a sort of giant and complex magic vortex. The water had just rushed in the siphon opened by a powerful mana implosion. The spear, or the blast maybe, had seemingly torn the world’s fabric, space, time and reality itself. Strange phenomena were appearing all around me, creatures that I had never seen, places I had never been to, buildings, objects, vehicles, plants, reactions, fluids, and a thousand of things that I could not name, all distorted by the magic and water curtain.

At some point I heard Octim’s voice bellow, uttering a deformed call for help. It sounded like an anguished screech instead.

That's when I truly felt despair. By any means I needed to escape that trap. I channeled all of my accumulated magic into my hands, forcibly summoning it out of my fingers, knowing very well that it would cause a leak in my core, possibly emptying it completely. Unexpectedly, my right hand managed to pierce the vortex curtain and catch hold of something apparently solid. I tried to lift myself up to escape into its world. I ended up pulling it with me.

A square and young man’s face appeared in front of me, bearing the dumbest smile and eyes full of confusion. He was dressed entirely in a blue suit, with his family crest on it: a white circle containing two crossed objects in a light blue color. I identified the first as a broom. The other was a weird one piece metal tool ending in a U shape. A text accompanied it : "Brad - technicien de surface." I had no idea what it meant. I did feel bad for reeling him in like this. His family would probably miss him...

These were just fleeting thoughts though. I had to try getting out any other possible way. I said to myself, “Call me insensitive but I —” a sudden sense of agony came to me. I screamed at the top of my lungs. Pain did not feel like this. Why was I shrinking ? Was it my unstable magic core collapsing on itself ? No, this was ... dying ? My mind blanked.

Somehow I regained consciousness. My senses felt absurdly dull. Everything was red around me. Had I become blind ? I had the impression of lying down at the bottom of a pond of blood at night time. I tried to spread my arms around, checking the surroundings. My body did not answer me directly. Or it did, but in an awfully slow way. I was quickly stopped by squishy yet impenetrable walls. I wanted to suffocate, but I could not breathe. "Damn it better not be claustrophobic now, don’t panic, come on !" I reassured myself. I took a pause to check my body instead. I had two arms and legs, hopefully, a somewhat human looking body in the end. But not mine. There was no hair ! I tried to feel my chest, but could not find it either … “Wait !” I froze. Hesitantly, I reached out with my hand to verify an important detail. “I am still a girl." I let out a long sigh of relief only interrupted by the sound of muffled voices outside. Human ones. Hard to understand, easy to distinguish.

But there were not just people outside. Inside, there was someone else. One like me. Its kicks of rage or despair had started to make my hideout a shaking hell. I replied with equally furious punches, hoping to knock some sense into its head. I refrained from hitting too hard though, consideration for the poor mom. Yes. By now I knew. The cord attached to my navel gave it a while ago. I was a baby. And most likely, inside a woman’s womb.

***

“I don't remember much of what happened. One second I am cleaning the bathroom floor, the next I wake up as a baby. Right, and between these two moments, I was thrown into the uncharted waters of a weird washing machine vortex by an unknown Viviane. Maybe I am experiencing one of those reincarnation myths. Maybe I am a time traveler now. Maybe I changed worlds and went through transmigration ? Damn I hope I can come back home. I have to think, I must calm myself. Obviously I am a human baby, I can think, I am me, Brad. But how did I keep my memories ? They couldn’t be transferred like this to a baby brain, right ? Oh no no no, nothing makes sense, Descartes help me ! Pretty please ...

I will know more when I come out of this place. The question is, when ? I don’t know how this is supposed to work. I mean, I know the theory, the contractions, the baby popping out and here we go. Am I ready to get out though ? Do I have to kick everywhere to cause the contraction ? I am sorry madam new mother. I am crushed in there, covered in viscous fluids, I hope you will forgive me when you see how cute I am !“

Gathering what seemed to be a decent yet controlled amount of strength, I tried to throw a punch. I aimed at what I took for the exterior of the belly, and softly hit something mushy. There was no room for ample movements, it was cramped in there. I tried kicking this time. Many times in fact. At first gently, then increasingly stronger, as confusion, frustration and dejection mixed themselves one after the other in my frantic rampage. Until something or someone hit me back. Coming from my right, exactly towards my head, stopped only by a thin membrane, a punch that I would remember. Humiliation. Whoever dared this was not a nice person. “Hello sibling, you will regret this one," I thought. However, it was not the end of it, and the rain of tiny punches only stopped when I conceded, lying still in my bubble. I lost the first fight of a new life. But only because I chose too.

I felt terribly tired anyway, and soon enough my mind resumed its drifting, from conjectures to worries, until I fell asleep. I woke up to muddy sounds, voices and cries dampened by the layers enveloping me. I felt strong pulses, coming like ripples, pushing me or maybe pulling me head first towards the ground. “Well that was not too long a wait," I told myself. Eager to come out and see what the world had to offer, I tried to follow the flow and move with the rhythm, pushing forward relentlessly, millimeter after millimeter. How much it contributed, I don’t know, but it took hours at least. Something humiliating happened again though, as I lost the race to come out first. Amidst the still muffled yells of pain, surprise and joy, I witnessed, from within the womb, stunned, the birth of my elder sibling. I would be last born now.

This negative consideration came to an end when I realized that I was probably the first human being to behold their own birth, and potentially never to forget it. When I saw the exit was near, when I felt the water break into a large gush of sticky fluid, I was submerged by deep emotions. From the darkness of the cervix, compressed, pulled by endless contractions, minute after minute, I could not help but think: “So that’s how it looks from inside ?”

Eventually, large adult hands grabbed me and pulled me out resolutely. A warm and colorful light was enveloping them, but it somehow felt natural and I did not give it much thought. Unsettled, restless, blinded by light, held lightly in the arms of a stranger, I felt tiny, weak and defenseless. I almost suffocated, as oxygen slowly stopped coming from the umbilical cord. In a pure uncontrolled reflex, I attempted to breathe for the first time. God it was hard. I tried, again and again as harsh, shallow first puffs slowly came out. Without even realizing it, I started crying, and it became easier, air fully engulfed my lungs, washing away the blood that previously filled them. In this victorious cry filled with a bit of pride and a lot of relief, I came to life once again. It was on the first day of year 1000, exactly 12 minutes after midnight, somewhere in the Antekosmos.

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