My lips were trembling. I felt like I was about to have a panic attack. I couldn’t believe it after all the attempts I tried to prevent failed. The peer pressure got to Yosefin. She was in the parking lot near the hospital when she called. Her doctor somehow found a way to reverse her mutations. The first phase of her medications involved injections that would attempt to rewrite her mutated DNA. If it became successful, she could sound different or look like her male counterpart. The next phase, if she chose, would be surgery. She didn’t expound on the details but I knew the dramatic changes that might occur.

“You’re really doing this?” I said, trying to keep myself together.

“Yeah,” she said. “I’m so nervous that I can’t stop smiling.” The fact she had a smile on her face pissed me off.

“Why... why would you do this?”

“Dude... you know why.”

“I know they’re for stupid reasons,” I said, raising my voice. “Come on, Yosefin. Don’t do this.”

“I’m a building away from fixing myself,” she said like she was forcing her words through her teeth. She was silent yet understandable. It sounded like white noise mixed with the sound of crashing waves.

“To fix what’s not broken.”

“Josh,” she said and went silent for a second. “I’m not going to argue with you.”

“Well, I am!” I argued with her as I drove home. We kept going on even after I put the groceries away. My parents were in the kitchen when they heard us talking. I had to walk down the neighborhood street to get some privacy.

“Bro! You’re gonna make me late!”

“Good!” I said, screaming. I pulled the muscles inside of my neck from how loud I spoke.

“What the hell is wrong with you?” She said with her voice down. “You’re my boyfriend. You should be supporting me.” I nearly spiked my phone once I heard her say that stupid shit.

“I have.”

“Fucking when?”

“Ever since you began to question yourself.” She began to fumble and stutter on what to say. “I’ve been trying to make you see there was nothing wrong with you.”

“You just don’t want me to be what I am supposed to look like!”

Her statement hit me hard. She revealed a part I didn’t openly admit. I didn’t want her appearance to change. It took me a while to come to terms with the fact of what she was. If her look switched, she might be happy, but I wouldn’t be able to look at her the same way.

“You’re right,” I said. “I don’t want you to look like that.” She was still aggravated. She asked me why I didn’t want her to change despite knowing the truth. I reminded her for the last time how special she was and the drama we went through that got to the point of being in a relationship. “You were fine before your cousin opened her mouth,” I said.

“But... my father, Josh,” she said, softening her voice.

“He didn’t stop you from pursuing me,” I said then added, “He didn’t stop you from becoming what I got to love.”

“He’ll... never let this go if I don’t do something.”

“I know.” We went silent. I could hear her sniffing the mucus back into her nose. “Go in and do it,Yose. Goodbye.”

The second I hung up, she said my name. Only the first two letters came through. I shut off my phone so I wouldn’t see her call me. The heartbreak and anger I felt battled with each other. I had to do something new to keep my mind off of her. I went to my room, looking for anything and everything to distract me. When I looked around the foot of my bed, I saw my skateboard. The last time I used it was when Yosefin and I skated at the park. Vanessa came into my room right before I was about to leave with the board.

“Is everything okay with you and Yosefin?” Vanessa said.

“I’ll be home before dark,” I said and left.

I drove to Maple Gardens without saying a word and no music playing inside of my car. The only few noises that filled my ears were the sounds of the tires rolling over concrete. Once I pulled into the park, the sounds of people skating came through my car. The sound amplified when I opened the door. There were tons of people out chilling, eating, lollygagging, and skating within the rink. I jumped in the rink without warming up.

I kept my mind occupied for hours, skating as long as I could. The temperature that morning wasn’t hot, yet the cloudless sky made the sun slowly cook my skin. It turned the skin on my forearm pink. A few grades darker and I would have gotten sunburned. Luckily, the park had benches with umbrellas over them, and vending machines around. I ate a small snack, drank a bottle of cold electrolights to cool off, and then sat in silence. The people around me acted like my only source of distractions. I refused to open my phone because I didn’t want to be tempted to speak with Yosefin.

“Let it go,” I said out loud to myself over and over. “She made her choice,” I said and looked straight ahead. Sitting on a bench without a parcel a few yards ahead was Yosefin. She had her head down into her hands. I could tell she was crying by the way her body kept shaking after she breathed in. The worry within me made me jog over to her without a second thought. “Hey,” I said the moment I sat next to her.

“Josh?!” She said, looking at me with tear-filled eyes.

“What are you doing here?” Her tears poured out like spilling water from a cup when she blinked.

“I didn’t do it,” she wept in a shakey voice. “I couldn’t do it!” I embraced her instead of asking her to clarify. She bawled loudly. Some people stared and came to see if she was okay. We had to move to the parking lot to get some privacy. “I couldn’t go through it.”

“What?”

“I didn’t want to disappoint you,” she said on the verge of crying again. “I didn’t want to lose you to some stupid shit I created!” Suddenly, she screamed, “What the fuck is wrong with me?”

“Settle down,” I said, massaging her upper arms. “What happened?”

“You said my name before you hung up,” she wept with a turbulent frown.

“Yosefin?” Her frown got bigger and kept shaking.

“You called me Yose before you hung up. Why?”

“I thought that was what you wanted to become again.” She cried some more but remained quiet. The more she cried, the more she had to use her arms to clear them up. I took off my shirt and gave it to her to use.

“I regret listening to them,” she said with her face in my shirt.

“Who?”

“The doctors! My cousin! My dad!” Each sentence got louder than the one before it. When she mentioned her dad, she shouted his name. “Josh,” she said, laying the side of her face on my chest. Her face was hot and sweaty. I said we should get in my car to cool off, but she didn’t want to at the moment. “I’m sorry for all the bullshit I said and caused.”

“You are a tough woman to be with,” I said and kissed the top of her head. “What am I going to do with you?” She looked up at me with a worried face. Both of her eyebrows pushed inward and went inverted.

“If I were you and went through the shit you’ve endured, I would find someone less problematic.” The suggestion to break up was something I thought about until she told me she didn’t want to change. “You truly deserve someone better than this emotional wreck.”

“Do you want to break up?”

“No,” she said, quivering her lips. “Do you?”

“I thought about it when you sought to change yourself.”

“I understand,” she said after letting her tears flow. “I was so focused on myself that I didn’t think how this would affect you.”

It was good to hear Yosefin recognize my worry. I sighed with relief at the thought of the nightmare coming to an end. Later that day, she came over to my house without warning at night with two sleeping bags. She looked drained. Her face was pink, and her eyes were a bit red. My father was behind me when I opened the door. She asked my dad if she could move in after she mentioned having a big argument with her father. The details of what went down she kept herself until she and I were alone. She promised to give my parents a monthly deposit to avoid any financial expenses due to her presence. My dad didn’t verbally agree. He waved his hand inward and went upstairs to his room.

Yosefin and I organized the stuff she brought inside the guest room. She brought more than two sleeping bags. Half of her room came with her. She brought her PC, clothes, shoes, blankets, pillows, and surprisingly the dildo from her bedside. One item I didn’t see was her gaming chairs. When I mentioned them, she said she was in a rush to get out. The chair required special tools to be disassembled. I offered her one of the dining chairs from downstairs to use, but she declined. She intended to get both of them the next day and asked if I wanted to come and help.

“I could use my dad’s pickup to take them whole,” I said.

“Will he allow that?” Yosefin said cautiously if she was scared to speak at a normal volume. “I don’t want to cause problems.”

“It’s good.”

The next day, we took my dad’s truck after Yosefin insisted she ask for his permission to take it to her home to pick up the chairs. I backed the truck down the driveway and parked it. Her father met her at the door before she could open it. He didn’t say anything. They looked at each other for a moment then she offered her hand to me.

“Let’s go,” she said. I took her hand. She interlocked her fingers between mine once I got in. “I just remembered I need to get some other things,” she said softly with her head tucked down. “Go ahead and take the chairs out.” She went straight to her bathroom. I grabbed the closest chair and rolled it out of the room. Her mother stopped me from heading back and asked if she could have a word with me.

“Is she moving in with you?” Her mother said quietly.

“She’s moving in with my family,” I said.

“For how long?” I shrugged my shoulders. “I apologize for all that’s happening and what my husband did.” Her apology left me confused. She didn’t do anything to cause all the turmoil Yosefin and I went through. I’d rather hear from Yosefin’s father’s lips.

“It’s fine,” I said not knowing what else to say at the moment. “My family doesn’t mind taking her in.”

“That’s good,” she said and sighed. Her husband came around the corner and all hell broke loose. “Look at what you did! She’s leaving because of your unacceptance!”

Ensure your favorite authors get the support they deserve. Read this novel on the original website.

I step inside Yosefin’s room to get away from them. Their voices echoed within the hallway. Yosefin listened from her bathroom as they argued over her body image. She shook her head several times and kept soothing her lips. Her parents argued over the correctness of her mutated body. I heard the same talking points from her father she spoke about. Every time he talked about her, he used the words, “he, him, his, Yose.” Her mother didn’t use those words.

“See what it is like?” Yosefin said and then grabbed the second chair. “I can’t be here anymore. My existence has become an issue.”

“Let’s go home,” I said and took the chair from her. “It’ll never be an issue there or anywhere when I’m around.” When I turned my back, she hugged me from behind and pulled herself into me. Her arms squeezed my stomach and chest.

“I love you,” she said. The volume was quiet yet louder than her parents. It sent chills up my neck and down my back.

“I love you too.”

She turned me around to kiss my lips. One wasn’t enough for us. We made out while her parents continued to yell at each other. Their voices began to fade out the more I focused on her. They got quiet to the point that they made me check over my shoulder. I thought they were looking at us. Fortunately, that wasn’t the case.

We left with the last chair and a bag of other items while her parents were still arguing. I lifted the chairs in the bed of the truck and took off. Yosefin never looked back. She sat tall, eyes forward, hands in her lap, and bobbed her head to the alternative rock on the radio. The only time she looked back was when she wanted to check her chairs. I had to drive slowly to keep them from rolling around. By the time she did, we were home.

“Bro,” Yosefin said. “We should do something nice tonight.”

“I’m all ears.”

“Let me think.” After we got her chairs in her room, she didn’t have an answer. She organized the things she brought in and had nothing to say about what she wanted to do. I thought she had forgotten until she took out a baby blue dress from the wardrobe. “Let’s go out to dinner.” She said and put the dress on the bed.

“Dinner?” I said, rubbing the fabric on the dress. It felt coarse yet the inside was soft. There were miniature white floral patterns throughout it. The waistline had a matching strap and the skirt had vertical creases all around it. “This looks pretty.”

“It was cheap. I had it when I had blonde hair. It might not look good on me now.” She looked stunning when I imagined what she could look like. I pictured her with the dark red lips, makeup, earrings, and high heels.

“The way I see it, I think you will look stunning.”

“Maybe you should dress me up,” she said, holding me from the side. “Ja?”

“Ja.”

At six o’clock, I put my image on Yosefin. She improved upon what I imagined. Instead of dark red lips, she made them pink and glossy. She put on an artificial blush, darkened her lashes, and put on white high heels that elevated her height to be level with the bridge of my nose. I felt underdressed. All I had on was a nice collar shirt and a pair of navy blue jeans.

“Looking great, babe,” I said.

“Thanks,” she said, hiding her smile with her hands for a short moment. “You should call me more by that name.”

“I’ll add it to my New Year’s resolution.” She shook her head as if I said something wrong yet it made her grin.

“God, you are so adorable,” she whispered with her fingers gently clawing my chest. “After we eat, I need to rant about something to you.” Her touch got softer. She circled her index finger on my left nipple.

“Is it something bad?” I said, speaking to match her calming erotic voice.

“Yeah,” she said and bit the corner of her lip. I got an erection from thinking about what could happen once we got back. My jeans didn’t have enough room to comfortably compress it. It hurt the more I flexed. I had to press it down so it wouldn’t lift against the fabric. “Settle down,” she said. “We’ll let it free later.” Her words didn’t help the situation. After we took some quick pictures, I had to walk as relaxed as I could to the car to soften the erection.

“I should’ve worn shorts.”

“Sorry about that. You’ve made me so happy and excited.”

“Excited? Are you horny?”

“No,” she said, rolling her eyes. “But, tonight will be special. You’re gonna get an award for loving me.”

“A reward?”

“Yes,” she said after giggling. “You’ve saved me.” Her smile went away. “You know that right?” I turned my head away but kept direct eye contact. “What?” She snickered. “Don’t look at me like that. It’s true.” She pointed forward to direct me to drive. Once I got out to the highway, she spoke about what she meant by I saved her. “I could have been a jealous bitch if you dated Naomi.”

“Yeah?”

“And I could have turned myself into a fucking dude if it weren’t for you saying my name. Thank you.”

“Now I got to thank you,” I said nearly choking on my words.

We were lucky we kept steering back to each other. I could have unfriended her after she told me who she was. I could have been in a terrible sexual relationship with Kat if it weren’t for Yosefin showing how stupid I was. If it weren’t for her jealousy towards Naomi, I wouldn’t realized I had the best girlfriend since the beginning. And lastly, if I didn’t say her true name, we would be no more. After all the mess and drama we went through, I was glad it flourished into a special connection.

“Hey,” she said and held my hand that was resting on the center arm console. “If I ever go crazy again, promise you’ll slap some sense into me.”

“You’re nuts,” I said and chuckled at the image of doing such a terrible thing. “You’ll be fine.”

“I hope so.”

“You will,” I said and jiggled her upper thigh. She pulled my hand back to it when I pulled away. I kept it there and occasionally massaged it until we got to the restaurant.

**

My parents were in their rooms once Yosefin and I got back. The only person up was my sister. Her lights were on and something loud was playing on her TV. Yosefin put her finger over her mouth and pointed her head towards her room. I had a strong gut feeling she was about to give me the reward she mentioned. Once I heard the pop of the locked door, I got undressed. She didn’t take off her dress at the start. The jewelry on her body was put away first before she took off her dress. She hopped on the bed with her underwear on and sat with her back against the headboard. Her legs and arms opened out to invite me in. I let her take hold of me to whatever type of she desired.

“Tell me what you want and I will give it to you,” I said.

“This is your reward,” she said, taking off my hairband and keeping my hair back. “You tell me what you want.”

“I want you to tell me.”

“Fine,” she said with a half-cocked eye roll. “Take off my panties, slowly.” I went extra slowly to maximize my arousal. My heart rate reached full stride the second her panties were no longer in my sight. “That thing is twitching. What’s gotten you this hard?”

“I feel like doing anything you say.”

“You sure about that?” She said smirking. “I don’t think we’re there yet, Joshy.”

“No, we are,” I said and spread her legs apart to get closer. “I’m ready.” Her blushing face and jittering eyes showed me she knew about what I was about to suggest. I didn’t have to say anything. She whispered what I wanted to do.

“I promise I won’t fuss about it if you don’t.”

“There’s no need for a promise,” I said slowly pushing inside of her. “This time I’m not bitching out.” She took in a lot of air from her mouth. I stopped and watched her face to make sure I wasn’t hurting her. She bit down on the bottom of her lips and watched me move all the way in until I couldn’t. “This better show you how much I am in love with you,” I said, keeping my voice down. “This was the ultimate nail in the coffin, yeah?” She bit harder on her lip before taking them out of her mouth. It was slightly wet and red around where the teeth laid their mark.

“You’re so dumb,” she said after letting the first moan come through. I moved back and forth without making too much sound. The house was dead silent. Besides the AC fans, the subtle noise within the house was my legs smacking her. She kept her hand over her mouth to muffle her moans. “Move quicker,” she said. The faster I thrust, the louder the contact with her skin got. Her breathing intensified. She had to brace her face to suppress all reactions. I kept going until she suddenly put her hand above my crotch. Her knees shot toward my hips. I stopped moving when I saw her body tremble.

“Oh my god,” I said and pulled out. “Did I hurt you?”

“Fuck! That was an intense one!” She said, laughing silently. “Come back. Come back. I’m fine.” She put me back inside of her. Thirty seconds later, her body shook and her legs came in again. “Oh, god,” she said, groaning. I saw her abdomen flex. She pulled her forearms back and pressed them against the side of her ribs.

“Yosefin? What’s happening to you?”

“Amazing stuff! Keep going! I’m loving it!”

I kept going until I couldn’t. It was an exhilarating, playful, and surprisingly informative time. The sex I watched in porn when I was younger wasn’t drawn out in the way we did. I didn’t expect we would stop fucking to watch amateur porn together to make sure we were utilizing more intimate positions. Sometimes we would talk dirty to replace our quiet rowdy moans and grunts. She had the best lines even though some were cringeful yet laughable. When we weren’t having sex, we would lay together and talk about random shit out of the blue before returning.

After we had the most vocally, spine-chilling, awkward, yet thrill-inducing time of our lives, we lay in a splotchy bed without saying a word. I was on my back and she was face down holding a pillow against her chest. I couldn’t believe I willingly and continually without an ounce of control managed to have sex until I couldn’t. She was right about the condom analogy. Plus, there were things I didn’t know her body would do until it happened. My body didn’t do the things she did. When we were watching porn together, I noticed most guys wearing condoms no matter where they went. But, there was a noticeable consistency to the ones who were doing what I could only do for her. I asked her again why I wasn’t using one. She said that her mutated body produces lubrication through arousal. She mentioned women also have the same capability but it wasn’t where the sun didn’t shine.

The bizarre incidents I saw at the beginning she had to explain afterward was that no one experienced the types of orgasms she had. Her body would spasm and shake when she climaxed. Sometimes she’d momentarily expel whatever came out of her. It was clear, had no color or smell, and resembled nothing like what I expected. Considering all of the unnatural aspects I saw throughout our time together, I didn’t think she would shock me with more surprises.

“Your tremors seemed to stop,” I said. “How are you feeling now?”

“So good,” she said softly and then squeezed her pillow. “So fucking good. How about you?” She asked and rolled over to see me. “Did you have some fun with your girlfriend?”

“I did and I’m mad at myself for not doing this sooner.”

“Don’t be,” she said and snuggled on top of me. “You weren’t into that at the time.” She spoke with such care. Her voice was quiet yet clear, unlike a whisper. “Hey, you’ve made me such a happy girl today, Joshy.”

“I’m glad to hear that, babe.”

“I love it when you call me that,” she said and scooted up my chest to make out with me. Her tongue went into my mouth. When it touched mine, she pulled away. A line of spit connected our lips. It drooped before splitting. Some of it landed on my chest while parts of it adhered to her chin. She came back and did the same thing, but I was ready. Her tongue felt slimy and soft. I could barely match her libido. I had to turn away to catch my breath.

“Too much?” She said.

“A bit.” We tried again but slower. I could feel her face wanting to press into mine. My lips were at her mercy. She kept going for a few seconds and then pulled away.

“Okay,” she said and wiped the saliva off of her mouth. “I’m done.”

“Are you?” She hummed and looked behind her to check to see if I was hard.

“Honestly, I could use another pounding.”

“Why did you say it like that?” I said nervously laughing. “Was I not rough enough?”

“You could’ve been a lot more assertive if it was just us in the house.”

“Wouldn’t that hurt you?”

“Nope,” she said, wagging her finger. “How did it feel inside?”

“It was warm, tight, smooth, yet frictionless like rubbing oil between my fingers,” I said slowly.

“My walls are elastic.”

“Elastic?!” I scoffed. I rolled my eyes. It sounded funny yet reasonable. The more I thought about it, the condom analogy had a second meaning. Condoms had some lubrication on them. Since she created her form of lube, I didn’t need it. “You had this planned out from the start,” I said. “You knew I wouldn’t need a condom because of what your body did.” She giggled with the biggest grin. “What other secrets do you have?”

“I can heal scarring,” she said with her finger pointing to the left side of her head. “Remember the accident?” The gash was gone. There was nothing but skin left.

“How?”

“Mutant powers,” she said in an exaggerated awe.

“You are something special.”

“I know,” she said after snuggling back on me. “I can also take seven inches like a champ too.” Her dirty remark made me laugh. “Next time we should do it when no one is around.”

“Yeah?”

“Being quiet was hard for me.”

“Maybe we should get a place.”

“Like a hotel?” I shook my head, no. “Then what?”

“An apartment.” Her eyes opened wide.

“You,” she stuttered. “You want me to live with you?”

“When I’m able to afford one.”

“Seriously?” She said with her lips. She looked at me like I was bullshitting.

“Yes!”

Both of the women I met had apartments. Each building looked cozy and could fit a least one other person. Naomi’s looked cheaper than Kat’s, but I preferred the smaller rooms. It would be perfect for Yosefin and I. She could live carefree from all the shit that tried to bring her down. The possibilities of our imagination decorating our living space gave me butterflies. I wanted to find a place sooner rather than later. When I told her how I felt, she wasn’t as eager as I was.

“Take your time, dude,” she said, soothing the side of my face. “We are young and still trying to figure our lives out,” she said then kissed me a few times. “Plus, I just moved in. I think I got several years before your parents kicked me out.”

“I guess you’re right.”

“Let’s take this slow, okay? I want these moments to last long so I can cherish them.”

“You got it.”

A new chapter bloomed halfway through the year. Yosefin’s turmoil over her image ceased. She regained the self-love she had when she accepted her mutations were a part of her life. I became more of an extrovert. We explored new thrills, vacationed to interesting places in and out of state, explored more of our intimate side together, and continued to study together.

Yosefin’s father barely spoke to her as the days went on. The only consistent contact she had with her family was through her mother. They kept tabs on each other a few days out of the week. The only time she went home was during special holidays and birthdays. Those visits didn’t last more than an hour. The tension remained present but it never turned confrontational. I felt like her father understood he couldn’t steer his daughter anymore to what he wanted. Plus, if it ever did, I would defend her in a heartbeat.

I went through an emotional toxic hell with Yosefin. It tested my patience thoroughly. I could have given up on many occasions, but thank god I didn’t. We were an unlikely couple. Normal people would’ve separated to find more easy-going matches. Thankfully, it was the opposite for us. Thankfully, we kept coming back.