Any new phone or laptop found in the commercial market is designed with a default system, which very few people venture away from even after fully purchasing the product. Similarly, the Milky Way is a default system used as a schematic for other solar systems in order to experiment with civilization to see how they develop much like bacteria cultivating in a petri dish.
John began his civilization journey by designing the dinosaurs, a fantastic feature that mirrored neopets. John made sure his ‘pets’ were fed, cleaned and well-rested. Although the requirements and abilities were fairly simple it was oddly satisfying keeping the creatures alive.
“John, why the fuck is the t-rex's arm so fucking small. What's the point if he can't even use its arms?" Lucy asked
John replying, "its cute, look at its big head and wittle arms. Haha it's just flopping about, can't even grab anything. Also, I had to stop and the cone wasn’t working anymore.”
“Why does a t-rex need a cone!?”
“It kept scratching its face after it accidentally wandered into and played around with Demeter’s poison ivy plant bed. The cone stopped it from scratching and causing lacerations on its face but then it started using its sharp nails to dig under the cone.”
“Ah the beauty of intelligence, now don’t you wish we kept the creatures dumb” Lucy mocked.
John pouted indignantly, “it’s not like the short arms are too terrible. Just had to bring in the t-rex model and get Hector to shorten the arms.”
“Oh I bet he loved that.”
“Well…..” John flashbacked to that particular conversation filled with Brahma’s laughter as he slowly changed the arm length to an impossibly short setting for the large figure even having to override the default system which stated ‘ARE YOU SURE YOU WISH TO MAKE THESE CHANGES. MAKING THESE CHANGES WILL SEVERELY AFFECT THE EFFECTIVENESS OF THE CREATURE.’
“It was a trip to say the least” John said laughing pathetically at himself.
“Oh, you’ve all been probably wondering who Lucy is?” Johns says as he casually breaks the 4th wall.
“Lucy, is my dumb sister. Back in the day people called her Lucifer. They’re not really off the mark about that. Lucy isn’t the king of hell but she sure does represent my own version of hell. After all, who do you think created shopping and politics? Anyway, back to how Lucy totally destroyed pangaea, you know the mega continent made up of all the broken continents that exist today. The reason you have to fly everywhere. All Lucy.”
Other dinosaurs that were less carnivorous such as the Brachiosaurus were the inspiration of the modern day giraffe. Lucy wanted to challenge herself by creating a powerful creature that could crush a t-rex without it having to kill another creature for sustenance. Shocking, I know but she had her days. However, the Brachiosaurus she created were too massive to support their own weight on dry land, and instead lived partly submerged in water.
In theory, their long bodies made of essentially pure muscle were perfect for long ranged attacks. The t-rex with its small arms, used its massive strong jaw to attack and kill its prey was clearly a close combat specialist. Hence, the match-up between the two beasts could either be epic or legendary. Imagine it, the Brachiosaurus using its long tail to whip at the t-rex while the t-rex tried to grab onto the neck or tail of the brachiosaurus.
This narrative has been unlawfully taken from Royal Road. If you see it on Amazon, please report it.
Unfortunately, due to their water and land dwellings, much like the cactus plant and seaweed they would never meet so the epic battle that could have been simply never happened, much to the siblings' shared disappointment.
After that major disappointment, Murphy's law once again reared its ugly neck causing the inevitable horror of any early game creation when, a few million years later, the system crashed by accident and everything began burning.
Now, many will ask how did the accident occur, and the answer to that is simple. No one should ever play meteor ball in the project solar system. Because, who knew that meteors were so scorching hot that a few immortal beings kicking it around in another area of the void, could actually cause the complete destruction of the early earth system.
“John’s son’s body wash, that’s hot” Thoth commented as he watched the fire raze the system.
‘Really, you don’t say~” Hector deadpanned watching the blaze encompass the planet.
Meanwhile Athena was standing at the side with a notepad jotting down the consequences of a meteor the size of a heavenly football hitting earth “Now this is quite interesting, so the pressure from the impact causes the dust to rise and the sheer power of that wind can actually tear apart some the creatures.”
“Don’t just stand there !!! Do something” John screamed as he downed a bucket of cold water over the burning system causing it to crackle and spit fiery flames outwards.
“Yeeeeah, you shouldn’t do that” Hector pointed out in a blasé manner as he held a large pan filled with popcorn above the fire.
“I have to agree with Hector, it is going to affect the electrical circuits we used in order to create the gravity function. Plus this is a once in a millenium occurence, I must write this down for science.”
“My babies are dying and you can only think of dining and how they are dying!!”
“Hmm, you look stressed, have a snick-snack” Hector says as he picks up a popped kernel and holds it out in front of John.
“I don’t want your blasted popcorn,” he replied, smacking the food out of Hector’s hand.
“Aaannnd that’s another meteor that is going to dent the moon” Athena sighing exasperatedly, having given up trying to save the system and its creatures from a fiery death.
Seeing no other choice and in a moment of desperation, John grabbed the burning planet and ran. “Out of my way, I need to save them !!!” John screeched carrying the earth in his arms as he hurled it into a huge freezer. The said freezer was not a huge food storage place like many mortals had in their kitchens. It was actually the Boomerang Nebula located in the Centaurus constellation, with a temperature of one Kelvin or -272 degrees celsius, which in simple talk meant it was ‘frosty the snowman and his horde of snowman friends could live there and consider it freezing’ level cold.
“My babies, are you okay” John whispered gently into the arctic system.
Surprise surprise, the dinosaur’s were in fact not okay. After perishing from extreme heat the few seconds spent in the freezer had promptly begun what we now know as the ice age.
“Well, I mean, at least the burning stopped,” Hector stated.
Flashforward to the present time and a dark cloud could be seen hovering around John making the rest of his immortal friends pretend they didn’t see the horrifying face the being was making as he stared at the film in front of him.
“I distinctly remember creating these animals with fur and feathers. So tell me" John wildly gestures to the screen in front of him "WHERE ARE THE FURS AND FEATHERS !!!"
John had to say he was not expecting Jurassic Park and frankly he was a little disappointed. He really thought it was going to be a cute film but all the dinosaurs were strange and had leathery skin.
“I can't believe the humans allowed their children to watch naked dinosaurs in theatres. You monsters. I actually took care of my t-rex well, almost better than my tamagotchi.However, just like a tamagotchi, if you forget to feed it a few times to many especially when it lived with you in the void ….RIP Sir Flufferton, you are missed.”
When the immortals thought about it, the whole dinosaur situation is weird because they had seen them roam the earth and yet with a blink of an immortal eye, cars are being powered by their dead liquified remains, which is kinda horrific from like a dinosaur's perspective.
“If they had psychics, they didn’t, at least I don't think they did unless Apollo did something funky about it again and didn’t tell me, they would probably cry” Brahma mused to Thoth who was too busy watching the epic dinosaur fight in the film they all low key wanted to happen in real life.
So, it was back to the drawing board for the ‘wise’ immortals as they placed the earth back in its solar system. They had to begin with a base, something similar to dinosaurs that would adapt to the new environment