“Are we there yet?” asked Tune.
“No,” replied Villager One. Then a brief pause.
“Are we there yet?” asked Tune.
“No.”
“When are we there?” asked Tune.
“By the logs, we’re not even moving!” Villager One threw her hands up. Not far from where Twig, Tune, and she was standing, Baladin and Dea lay in the grass enjoying the warm weather. They were lying almost exactly where they had started, and the mayor and the spectators were watching them silently. The other two teams had long since disappeared into the forest.
Villager One continued. “Apparently our venerable leader here is so good at finding prophecised swords that he, what, wanted to give the other teams a handicap? What is your plan, anyways?”
“I was about to ask the very same, before you interrupted me,” said Tune. “Baladin, how are we finding the prophecised sword?”
Baladin, with eyes closed, said: “I’m glad you asked. My plan is simple but efficient. Lie here and enjoy this rare, sunny weather.”
“Right…” said Tune. “I am admittedly unclear how that helps.”
“Tune, you know what vitamin D is?”
“No.”
“Well, neither do I, but I think it’s sun-related and good for you.”
“What about you, Xv;?” asked Villager One, referring to Dea, the sorceress, lying beside Baladin. “For someone entering in the last minute, you sure are letting the succeeding minutes slip by.”
“Don’t involve me in this discussion,” said Dea. “I could not care less what you people do.”
“If only everyone had your clarity of vision…” said Baladin.
“So what was the point of entering into the competition if you were just going to waste our time?” asked Villager One.
Baladin opened an eye.
“I didn’t want any of this,” he said. “One day my mother died and Moromir came talking about some prophecy. Next thing I know, we need to go find some prophecised sword, which frankly, I couldn’t be bothered with. Well now he has his own team and can do with them as he needs to, while I have mine and can do what I want. Win-win.”
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“But where is your sense of adventure?” asked Tune. “This is our chance at becoming heroes. Imagine the name ‘Tune’ – or exchange Tune for your own name – written in golden letters in the novels of history. Under the title ‘Finding a super cool murder sword’.”
“Alright, I’ll imagine,” said Baladin. Then he closed his eyes, and didn’t. “No, I’d rather stay here.”
“His imagination is not strong enough,” muttered Twig. “Baladin is unfit to be a leader! The only answer to an unjust leader who refuses to give up their position is violence.”
“Hey, why didn’t you just say so. I’ll give up my position, easy as that. Who wants it?”
Tune raised his hand. “Me! Me! Pick me!”
“There you go, Villager One, the leadership is yours.”
“Hey, Baladin, I think you may have misheard–” began Tune.
“Finally!” said Villager One. “Baladin might be content with gently losing the hunt, but I’m not. We’ve lost some time, but if we follow the others, we may still catch up. I won’t be wasting any more time. Anyone who wants can join.”
She began walking down the hill, towards the forest.
“Forsooth!” cried Tune. “Well said, Villager One. I shall lead this expedition, and any who wants to, shall join me.”
Twig muttered something to himself.
“Only one question,” said Tune. “The first team has five people all armed to the teeth. The second team has only one armed woman, but her teeth sit comparatively higher.”
“We will fight with the ferocity of the sun,” said Twig. He punched into the air, but his fists were caught by the wind and went slower and in different directions than intended. Then he followed Villager One.
“Alternatively, the sorceress could join,” said Tune, remaining. Dea did not reply.
“Your silence speaks volumes.” Tune closed his eyes as if he was grieving. Then he ran after Villager One and Twig, and, as he was wearing high heels and they were walking downhill, it was long before he caught up completely.
Now Baladin and Dea (and their spectators) remained. Baladin couldn’t remember ever having experienced such nice weather. He had almost fallen asleep when Dea jumped up.
“Alrighty! Sword located, let’s move,” she said. The audience applauded.
“How did you find it?” asked Baladin.
“Magic. Quick, rise and shine. The rest of our team we can disregard, but as for the others, it is important that us two are first to the sword.”
She started moving, and Baladin stumbled after her.
“So you knew how to find the sword this entire time? Why did you bother with entering the competition. Also, what about the bean thing?”
“You want a bean?” she asked, face lighting up.
“No, because it’s probably poison. Or… magic poison.”
“Then we need the sword. It doesn’t demand a lot from you, so just keep your arms and legs inside the cart and follow me.”
“I don’t understand what that means, so I will take it as an insult,” said Baladin. They walked into the forest in exactly the same direction as everyone else had.