Waiting for the Lizards’ arrival had caused the next few days to pass quickly, as I was kept up at night at the mere thought of seeing them all again. Mari, Nessa, Makko, Anthony… being able to show them just how much I’d learned and just how strong I’d become excited me like nothing else. In some ways, I considered them, too, to be a part of my extended family– especially after what we’d been through together. I also wondered how they were managing, considering that Jasper had been their leader.

The knock on the door alerted me to their presence, and as I had been pacing up and down the house for the past ten minutes (which was unusual for me), I was the first one to reach the doorknob. Mentally preparing myself for the final time, convincing myself that this was indeed real, I twisted the handle and pulled the door open.

I was met with Nessa and Mari, and behind them Anthony and Makko. Nessa wasted almost no time tackling me to the floor at such speed I was certain I couldn't have dodged even when using Blink. Though, despite the fact that my body was constantly augmented by soul, which cushioned my fall, I still had to deal with the weight of the grown woman on top of me.

Anthony, Mari, and Makko gazed down at me, presumably taking in my features, which were older than the eleven year old boy they had come to know. Nessa pulled herself to her feet, composing herself before speaking.

“How the hell did you survive that fall, kid? We all… thought you died.”

Nessa glanced towards the other three, whose eyes had all dropped towards the floor as they seemed to be looking anywhere but me. Quickly changing the subject, Makko patted me on the back as I got to my feet, a grin on his face.

“Well, it's good that you lived. Not only that, but we hear that you somehow managed to win the Succession Ritual Tournament! Man, you scare me…”

He punched my arm lightly, which caused Anthony to chuckle and speak.

“I always knew he was a monster… winning that thing at 12?”

I should have laughed along with them, but that word– ‘monster’– caused my heart to twist slightly. However, I pushed it away, smiling up at them.

“So, how's the adventuring business been going?”

“Well, we recently went to Krystallos as you know,” Nessa said, “But other than that, we've been notified that we're supposed to be guarding you soon enough. And honestly, I'm more worried about how we’re expected to guard you….”

“And what about a leader? Because Jasper's–”

“Funny you mention that, actually. Our new leader is…”

Mari raised her hand shyly. To be honest, it wasn't exactly what I had expected. Mari was the quieter type, rather shy and awkward. But looking beneath that, I could see leadership qualities. Calm and collected in difficult situations. Able to speak her mind when it mattered. Though she didn't have much of a voice all the time, she had one when it was needed most.

The heart of the Lizards had never been Jasper.

No, it had been Mari all along.

I merely smiled, extending my hand out to her. She took it, and shook it gingerly. She would grow into it, just like I had. With time, care, and effort.

“I'll be in your care, then.”

“I-I'll try my best…”

My hand let go of hers quickly as I felt a presence at the top of the stairs, which quickly approached. In a blur of white, Isabella shot towards me– as I had left her sleeping– before I caught her like a dodgeball, close to my chest as the force dispersed.

‘The hell was that for?!’

‘You didn't wake me up,’ She complained, ‘I would have missed them!’

‘They don't even know you exist, the hell do you mean?!”

‘Yeah, but I know they exist.”

Our argument continued for a few more seconds, before I became conscious of those around me wondering why I was glaring daggers at a white furball. Isabella uncurled, before leaping up onto my shoulder and giving them a look of acknowledgement.

“Kuu!”

“This is my bond, Isabella. I found her shortly after we parted, and she hasn't left my side since.”

“What species even is she?” Makko piped up.

“I don't actually know, to be honest. Some sort of horned wolf.” I was used to lying through my teeth to those around me. The lack of remorse from my past life had carried on into this one, and I still couldn't bring myself to feel anything, even if I hurt them as badly as I had hurt Yao, Yuxi, Elowen, and Liam. Only those who could afford it had the luxury of feeling bad for their enemies in battle.

They were nothing but numbers to me.

My mother's voice broke me out of my thoughts, as it always did. She had a habit of bringing me back to reality and down to earth, even when I questioned myself and the legitimacy of my own decisions. Sometimes, I feared what she would say. When she found out I was an imposter in the body I lived in, a leech that was living through imitating her dead son. Would she still look at me, smile at me, love me the same?

As much as I didn't want to admit it, the thought of being pushed away haunted my nightmares just as much as losing them did.

“I'm glad you're all having fun reuniting, but remember, we have to go clothes shopping today. We can't attend the princess’ birthday looking shabby, you know?”

Ensure your favorite authors get the support they deserve. Read this novel on Royal Road.

—

We spent most of the day ambling around aimlessly, trying a few sets of clothes out before finally choosing. However, I had other plans. After gaining permission, I broke away from the group once more, having left Isabella with my family, heading to the all-too-familiar alleyway where Hotaru’s smithy was. That day, I wasn't asking her for a sword– at least, not for me. It was to purchase a birthday present for Hua.

I had thought over what I could get her numerous times, but I never seemed to settle on simply one thing. What would work best with her character? What would she benefit from? No, it wasn't just about utility. What would she like?

Searching around Hotaru's shop whilst hearing her in the background, my eyes caught nothing which I thought would be of Hua's tastes. Now that I thought about it, I didn't know what she would like. For all the time we'd fought together, laughed together, lived together, almost died together–

I still knew little to nothing about her interests.

Perhaps that was likely a result of my past life's actions interfering in my current ones. Even then, those who I had fought together to the bitter end with were nothing more than pawns in a game I controlled. I wasn't as strong, fast, or as talented as others– so I used their strengths to my own advantage and devoured them whole.

Even then, we were so close, yet worlds apart. In reaching distance, but never able to touch. This whole time, I had never considered what she was to be. Well, she was a ‘friend’. I hadn't had a friend since Arwan, Deianira, and Evanora. Ever since I had lost them, I didn't dare grow close to another. She was as important to me as they had been...

…No. I couldn't say that. That was far too bold a statement.

They had been my everything when we were children. When we believed that our wishes would come true, when we dared to dream of dreaming. Before those dreams fell from the sky, and shattered like broken glass on the cold concrete of reality.

“You alright, kid? You've been staring into space for a while now.”

I didn't realise I had been lost in thought until Hotaru's voice dragged me back to reality. Rising from the crouching position I had been in, I turned to face her.

“Ah– I’m sorry. I didn't realise.”

“You can make it up to me by telling me what's got you so stumped, though.”

“It's… nothing.”

“No, go on. I'm interested. You don't seem like the type to freeze up in thought.”

“I'm struggling to pick a gift for my friend, Hua. I just… feel like I don't know anything about her.”

Hotaru cracked a wistful smirk, seemingly thinking deeply on what I had said to her. After about a moment, her head raised, and she motioned for me to follow her into the back of the shop. I hadn’t been there since forging Genesis– and it was certainly more cluttered than the last time I’d seen it, with forging equipment simply lying around where anyone could steal it– or, the more likely option, trip and fall over them.

“Gimme a second,” She said, searching around amongst the various piles of stuff she had in there, before pulling a box out sharply with an “Aha!”, turning to face me and holding it out in front of her. It was very dusty and quite clearly old, not having been opened in a while. In response, I raised an eyebrow, but she just grinned at me.

“I’ve heard you’re going to become an adventurer, and since your friend’s the crown princess, she won’t be going with you. Right?” Nodding along, I allowed her to continue speaking without interrupting her flow. Sometimes she was too excitable for my liking… “Then, you’ll need something to keep you two connected. And so, I present to you…” The box opened rather dramatically, and I peered closer.

“A… pair of rings?”

“Not just any pair of rings! These rings analyse your soul core and your soul levels, before transmitting that information through the symbols engraved on them. That way, for her peace of mind, she’ll know you’re okay! Or if you’re in any trouble… which, knowing you, I doubt you will be.”

I thought for a moment. Those would work well, almost too well, actually. They’d do just fine as a birthday present, but I also needed to think about my mother’s peace of mind as well. She’d no doubt be worrying about me the entire time. Come to think of it, I also had quite a bit of money from Hua for being her knight after she’d regained her status as princess fully. I could get everything I needed for my adventure, and there was no better blacksmith in the city than Hotaru herself.

“Could I get another pair? For my mother? She’ll be worrying about me, too.” Hotaru nodded in response, going to get them, but I stopped her as I wasn’t done yet. “I also need some other stuff… boots with sound magic to silence them, some under-armour for my size, arm braces, fingerless gloves, and a long, black coat with a hood.”

“That’s quite a lot. You sure you’ve got the funds for that, kid? I mean, I’m certain I could find all that stuff for you, but…”

A grin spread across my face as I raised up a large bag of gold, dropping it in front of me. In response, Hotaru simply nodded, before starting to search through her shop for everything I had requested. Ugh…. this was going to cost a lot, I could already feel it.

—

Hotaru was firm, but I drove a hard bargain, managing to get what I wanted whilst still having some money to spare. Carrying everything I had bought in a bag over my shoulder– I had somehow managed to cram everything in– I slowly made my way back to the group.

Truthfully, it had been such a long time since I had gone anywhere without Isabella, I felt slightly lonely. Gods, I was pathetic now. The fact I needed the company would have been shameful for me in my past life. Or perhaps we both needed it– I had just gotten so used to being alone I didn't even realise how much I longed for the company of another.

‘Did you miss me?’ Isabella’s smug voice resounded through my head. I glanced around, looking for her, but she wasn't there.

‘If you're looking for me, you won't find me. I'm not there. We're bonded, remember?’

‘Yeah, I remember. We've just never been this far apart before, so I didn't think it would work.’

‘Of course it does. I told you, I'm always with you. But hurry up! We're waiting in the main square for you.’

‘I will.’

It was hard to hide my emotions from Isabella, considering we were bonded. However, there was always this sense of worry in the back of my mind that I couldn't rid myself of. I'd noticed I was prone to losing myself to anger– or, those whispering thoughts in the back of my mind. Symptoms of insanity– yet I wasn't insane.

I'd never had such a problem in my past life. I'd never had such utterly destructive thoughts as murmuring undercurrents beneath my calmer thoughts. They only seemed to appear when my emotions were especially volatile, too, and took over my body in the brink of an eye, making me prone to do things I never would have otherwise.

I still couldn't feel remorse, that much was evident. But the way I behaved when those thoughts surfaced was beyond what I was used to.

Shaking the feeling off– I'd have to investigate it later, but for now it was best not to let Isabea know– I hurried towards the main square, especially considering that they had undoubtedly been waiting there for me for quite a while.

Slowing down as I approached my family and the Lizards, I raised a hand in greeting with a small smile. Isabella sat, perched on Mari's shoulder, having taken a liking to her.

“Did you get whatever it was you needed?” My mother asked me, once I was in earshot. Calmly, I nodded in response.

“Yes– and I also got some adventuring equipment as well, so you guys don't have to buy it for me.”

It was the least I could do, since they were already allowing me to go on the journey in the first place despite the worry I had already caused them. Taking one of the ring boxes from my pocket, I handed one to my mother, who examined it carefully.

“It's so you don't worry about me. One is for you, one is for Hua, and the final one is for me. Both of yours are bonded to mine, which examines my core and my soul levels. If I ever get dangerously low– which I promise I won't– the symbols on the ring will glow a dark crimson colour.”

She slipped it on without wasting any time, as I put mine onto my finger as well. I doubted that anything I could face whilst out adventuring would be stronger than anything I had already fought– but I wasn't about to bet on that.

Adventuring was dangerous, but I was grateful for the Lizards being by my side. Isabella was company– but she was part of my mind. I needed proper company to make sure I didn't properly lose myself to those thoughts that were normally confined to the back of my mind.