Chapter 6
Suddenly there was white everywhere. It didn't make sense, Yu Jin could not make out where it ended. There were no walls, no ceiling just endless white. Yu Jin couldn't remember when or how he even got there.
He tried getting up but he didn't have the energy. His mind was clouded and there was this haziness whenever he tried to think.
“.....”
Suddenly he felt something from behind him. He started panicking he couldn't move yet whatever the presence was it kept coming closer and closer until it was right in front of him.
He couldn't see properly, there was this bright light coming from the figure in front of him he couldn't really make out what it was. Through his squinting eyes he could just make out long flowing blonde that had such luster he was sure whatever was in front of him couldn't be human. He tried concentrating more on the face but all he could make out was a gentle smile.
The rose pink lips opened to say something but then drowsiness hit him and he fell unconscious yet again.
***
Yu Jin felt himself start to awaken, his body felt weird as if it was floating and there was a tingly feeling all over his skin. As his eyes opened the first thing he saw was Ji Seo-Yun.
“....”
She was fast asleep.
‘Wait, wait, wait… what's with this position?’
Yu Jin had just noticed that his head was resting on her thighs and her hands were on his chest.
‘What do I do? What if she wakes up when I try to get off? Wait, why would I even get off’
A curvy smile started blooming on his lips till something wet fell on his face. Confused, Yu Jin touched it and it was a clear liquid. He looked up at Ji Seo-Yun and saw that it had come from her. After looking closer at her face it looked like she had been crying. Her eyes were puffy and her pale white face had a red tint to it.
‘Why would she be cr….’
Then it hit him…. Everything that had happened before he passed out. It all came rushing back to him.
The scene of Kim Min-Jun falling from the bridge into that pit. The fact that he couldn't make it in time.
‘I couldn't save him…. It was all my fault… I killed him.’
This book's true home is on another platform. Check it out there for the real experience.
Yu Jin was racked with self loathing. He knew what happened was his fault. He was the one who kept making the party go further and further even when they should have gone back to rest.
He wasn't strong enough to save his best friend.
His only friend…
He didn't even notice that he had started crying as well. He felt a pain in his heart that he'd never felt before. It was an emptiness, it was pain, it was something gnawing at his very soul. He felt so much guilt and that guilt gradually turned to anger.
Anger to the fact that he had lived and his friend had dead. Anger that he was weak. Anger that he treated all of this as a game,never stopping to consider that death was always around the corner.
The whirlwind of emotions just ended with a sigh.
He was just tired, tired of everything, tired of breathing, of feeling and simply tired of thinking.
He wanted to die.
When the thought entered his mind the picture of Kim Min-Jun flashed before him. He didn't know what to do next. Something within him had changed. How could he run around playing dungeon explorer like before after this. How could he go on without a care in the world.
He sat up and immediately Ji Seo-Yun eyes flashed open.
“.... Oh, you're awake?”
“... Yeah”
For a while there was an awkward silence in the air.
“... I'm sorry”
The usually distant Ji Seo-Yun who gave off an air of confidence with each word was gone. For the first time since they had met she seemed her age. She seemed to not know what to say and couldn't even look him in the eye.
She kept on speaking
“it was my fault, if I didn't get careless and avoided that injury he…”
She closed her eyes as if searching for strength to go on. Wiping the tears clouding her vision she pushed on.
“Please forgive me, I don't know what else to say or do…”
After this she stayed quiet, she just grasped her hands together and waited. Waiting for Yu Jin to chastise her, his next words surprised her.
“How did we get back here?”
“... I waited for my hp to go back up then carried you back here.”
“Thanks”
With just that, Yu Jin got up and started walking away.
Unbeknownst to the two at first, there were a lot of people in the safe zone most of whom were listening in to their short conversation. Yu Jin however didn't care he just walked past the eavesdroppers and headed to leave the dungeon. Ji Seo-Yun was surprised by his reaction but didn't say anything. She just knelt there and watched him leave.
Yu Jin took the portal back to the entrance and didn’t even spare a look behind him. He passed the checkpoint and got on the bus to go home. All the while the feeling of emptiness remained. For the first time in his life he felt lost , truly lost not knowing what to do. He couldn’t just run around like he did before just for the sake of adventure. He couldn’t just have fun when Kim Min-Jun had given his life for him.
He kept feeling the seat next to him, the seat Kim Min-Jun would usually be. He kept looking back at all their silly fights and arguments. All the plans they had made the future. Yet here he was, alone.
After catching a train he got off in Sillim. It wasn’t the best place to stay it was a little rough but it was home. It was already dark but he didn’t mind he actually preferred it like this compared to the hustle and bustle during the day. He walked into the tiny two bed apartment they shared and just slumped on the bed and slept. He didn’t have the energy to think anymore. He just wanted to escape to his dreams and forget about what happened even if it was just for a moment.
***
The next morning Yu Jin didn’t feel like getting out of bed and just lazed in bed only getting up to use the toilet and eat.
This went on for about two weeks till one day when he was peeing he looked up and saw himself in the mirror. He just looked at himself for a while. He couldn’t recognize himself, it was just two weeks yet his he looked homeless, The look on his face was that of someone who didn’t have anything to live for someone who was just waiting for the release. The worst part was his eyes, that’s what truly shook him. His black eyes looked completely soulless and without drive.
‘Is this how I am going to live the rest of my life? This life that Kim Min-Jun died to protect. Will I just waste it.’
He began to realize that he was letting Kim Min-Jun down. Wherever he was he couldn’t repay what he did with this ingratitude. He felt something again within his heart, Something different from the throbbing pain and the constant emptiness. As the look on his face started to change he could see it in the mirror. He was filled with resolve, resolve to continue what Kim Min-Jun and him had started. To continue to climb the dungeons and find what waited at the end. He would make sure he wouldn’t make the same mistakes as the past. He would see it through no matter what struggles he faced. No matter what, nothing would stop.
For the first time in a long time he muttered
“Status”