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Adventurer Slayer
Chapter 4: Bullying Some Goblins

Chapter 4: Bullying Some Goblins

After the fight against the Armored Salamanders ended, the search for the lost monstroscope began. Luke crawled on the ground and left no stone unturned. Severus dispatched his raised salamanders to scour the corners of the cavern. And both Vance and Robinia were forced to search the unsanitary nests of the salamanders, where there was an unsightly mixture of rotting human and monster meat. In the end, however, the expensive gadget was never found. It was as if the earth had split open and swallowed it into its folds, or so did Benedict say as he waited on a rock for the desperate search to end.

“What will we do now?” Robinia said, after the party regrouped.

“Should we head back and buy another scope?” Benedict said.

“And waste time and money?” Luke scoffed. “I don’t think so.”

Robinia looked at Vance, who gave her a covert signal—an inconspicuous wave of his little finger. When she saw this signal, she cleared her throat and said with a tone of gravity, “I think a change in leadership is needed.”

“Huh?” Luke turned to her in surprise. “What are you saying?”

“I agree,” Vance said calmly.

“I’m sorry, Luke, but I have to agree too,” Severus said, taking the bait that Vance and Robinia had put out. “You gave Vance our only monstroscope without thinking of the consequences. And during the fight, you wasted a lot of time hitting those salamanders’ armors. Your laxity forced me into a difficult situation. I even had to drink one of my potions.”

“Oh, so now everything’s my fault?” Luke scoffed. “I’m the leader of this party, and I’ll never give up my position. If you have a problem with that, you can go back to Cromsville, pal.”

“Everyone, let’s calm down,” Benedict said. “Don’t let the heat get to you.”

But Severus ignored him and retorted, “You stole my kills with that weird tornado Skill of yours, Luke.”

“So that’s what this is all about,” Luke laughed. “You’re just a Necromancer. Why are you so obsessed with getting more kills?”

“They give me buffs that can help us in later fights. It’s time you stopped thinking as a solo adventurer and considered investing in your team.”

“To hell with your buffs!”

Luke and Severus grabbed each other’s clothes and entered an intense staring contest. Before long, they were exchanging curses and insults. They raised their fists to punch each other, but Benedict stepped in and mediated in their dispute. The monk tried to remind them that they were in monster territory and that it was in the party’s best interest that they calm down. Everything he said made perfect sense, but the two hardly listened to him. They continued to shout at each other as if they had been bitter enemies, and every shout made their faces redder and their voices hoarser.

Vance watched in amazement. He hadn’t expected the situation to spiral down into such a childish altercation, but he was almost thankful that it did. It made it much easier for him to accomplish his goal. He clasped Robinia’s hand and made her tilt her head toward him. Then he whispered a few words in her ear. Seeing a smile appear on her face, he clapped her on the shoulder to encourage her more, and his lips spelled, “Do it now.” The three words left his mouth like the whispers of a devil. And then he walked a few steps away from her—creating a distance that would prevent the others from forming needless associations.

As the noisy argument continued, Robinia said, “Maybe we should split up.”

Luke and Severus looked at her. They first seemed a little confused by the unexpected suggestion, but then they let go of each other’s clothes and began to consider it.

“This way we’ll find the Cindermite crystals faster,” she continued, “and you won’t have to fight the monsters together.”

“I don’t think that’s a good idea,” Benedict said. “We accepted a job that requires a party of five. If we split up, we will lose our advantage against the monsters. We’ll get wiped out.”

“Wiped out? You must be joking.” Severus folded his arms and raised his chin with hauteur. “I have three Armored Salamanders to fight for me, so I can handle myself pretty well.”

“But we don’t even have a monstroscope anymore,” Benedict said. He tried his best to communicate his worries, but the budding rivalry between Severus and Luke was too strong a force to oppose.

“I don’t mind splitting up either,” Luke said, wrapping his right arm around the monk’s shoulders. “Things might get a bit rough without a scope, but as long as Benedict and I are together, nothing can stop us.”

“I’ll go with Luke and Benedict,” Robinia smiled. “Which leaves Vance to go with Severus.”

An expression of alarm appeared on Benedict’s face after he heard these words. He wiped the sweat off his forehead and said with little hesitation, “No, Vance should come with us.”

“Are you in your right mind, Benedict?” Luke retorted in a burst of anger. “He’s nothing but a dead weight, and I’m sick of babysitting him. He can go with Severus for all I care!”

“No,” Benedict said, “Vance has to come with us.”

“Why is everyone so stubborn today?” Luke sighed. “I’m the party leader, and my decisions are final.”

“No. You don’t understand …” Benedict held Luke’s arm that was spread across his shoulders. “I mean … The Necromancer …”

“It’s okay, Benedict,” Vance said, with a reassuring smile. “I don’t mind going with Severus. He’s an experienced adventurer, and there’s a lot I can learn from him. I’ll be much stronger by the time we meet again.”

“Vance …” Benedict squeezed Luke’s arm tight.

“The matter’s settled,” Luke said, pulling his arm away and freeing it from Benedict’s grasp. “We will split up and meet here again after five hours.”

***

The deeper a human being walked inside the Sweltering Caverns, the more oppressive and unbearable the heat became. A curtain of steam often veiled the path and made it more perilous to traverse, and several pools of lava were waiting—past sharp corners and near precipitous edges—for an unsuspecting adventurer to misstep and fall into their salivating maws. A strange, sourceless sizzle echoed throughout the tunnels, as if from a never-ending barbecue, and the smell of burning never subsided from the air. The only redeeming quality of the place was the sparkle of the precious stones that covered the walls. And yet even this sparkle could be thought of as no more than a trap—a bait used by Death to harvest more souls.

Vance and Severus made their way through this unwelcoming environment, sweating as if they had been in a sauna. The Necromancer led the way. His Armored Salamanders lit their tails and illuminated the tunnel when it was dark, and his steel dagger left marks on the wall to make sure that he never walked in a circle. He exuded the confidence of an adventurer who had been to more dreadful territories, but time made it apparent that he wasn’t as calm and collected as his expressionless face implied: every now and then, he stopped and punched the wall with bitterness. And even Vance couldn’t understand the reason behind this behavior.

It was only a while later that Severus began to express the thoughts that were festering in his mind. After crossing a lava pool, he suddenly said, “I hate liars.”

The comment lacked any context, and Vance didn’t say anything in response.

“People tell all kinds of lies to get you to join their party,” Severus continued. “They flatter you again and again, and you end up believing them. Then the party registration is complete. You leave on your first job, and they show their true faces. It’s all so disgusting.”

“Are you talking about Luke?” Vance said.

“That bastard made lots of promises.” Severus spit on the ground. “He said he’d put his party first. He told me he’d let me explore my real potential. I can’t believe I trusted all the shit he said.”

“Don’t feel bad about it. You just left your previous party, right?”

“Yeah …” Severus said.

“So he caught you when you were vulnerable.”

“Yeah, you’re right … To make some easy money, probably.”

“You won’t lose much if you leave our party after this job is complete,” Vance said, wiping sweat off his face. “Freedom again, I guess.”

Severus sighed. He was about to say something, but then a noise came from the darkness ahead. With a quick command, he ordered his salamanders to investigate the area. They crawled forward and waved their tail flames until an unsightly shadow appeared on the walls of the tunnel. The salamanders then creeped closer to where the shadow had formed, and their light revealed a green-skinned creature half the size of a human. It was an adult male goblin, dressed in the hide of a Sickle-horned Deer and armed with an iron bludgeon. It seemed to have been on a hunt because it was lying in ambush near a Fire Rodent hole. But the arrival of humans meant that it had become the prey.

“This gob was out of luck the moment it left its nest,” Severus said.

The undead salamanders surrounded the goblin in no time. With its back against the wall, it waved its bludgeon right and left in a fit of blind rage. Little could it do to defend itself, however. The rusty bludgeon only landed on the salamanders’ thick armor, and the goblin recoiled from the impact. Then it was the salamanders’ turn to attack. They whipped their tails, disarming the goblin at the fifth lash. Before it could reclaim its weapon, they breathed fire and left horrible burns all over its body. It screamed in pain and writhed on the ground, but the merciless fire attacks neither eased nor ceased.

The tale has been stolen; if detected on Amazon, report the violation.

“Isn’t this enough?” Vance said. “Aren’t you going to raise it?”

“Why would I raise a goblin?” Severus laughed. “It’s too weak.”

This is odd. Vance watched the goblin cry in pain. Severus doesn’t have enough Intelligence to raise stronger monsters, so why is he so picky?

After a few moments, the goblin had been cooked into a nice meal, and the undead salamanders began to feed on its charred remains. They ripped its body apart with their teeth and tore the green-black flesh off its bones.

“I got my first kill of the day,” Severus announced. “The fun starts now!”

“Congratulations,” Vance smiled. Then it occurred to him to re-check the Necromancer’s Intelligence. He looked closely at Severus. 200?! Panic almost found its way to his heart, but he calmed himself down and began to think rationally. Did he get a buff from defeating that weak goblin? His Intelligence was 175 before, so it has increased by 25 points since the last time I checked. And I don’t even know what happened to the rest of his stats. They may have increased too.

“Let’s go find the goblin nest,” Severus said. “I could use a few more kills.”

This is bad. Vance followed Severus deeper into the tunnels. If his Intelligence increases with every kill, then it’s only a matter of time before he can raise stronger monsters. And if any of his other stats increase too, he’ll be much harder to kill. Vance clicked his tongue. Should I attack him now?

He checked the status of his Mana Poisoning.

Status Alert Mana Poisoning (Active: 47 minutes remaining)

So I need 47 minutes for the poisoning to end and 13 minutes for my Mana to regenerate completely. This might give him enough time to clear the nest, but it can’t be helped. 60 minutes in total … I should use this time to gather as much information about him as I can.

“What’s wrong, Vance?” Severus said.

“Nothing.”

“I told you I hate liars.” Severus stopped. “You wanted that kill, didn’t you?”

“Y-Yeah,” Vance smiled. “You got me.”

“Don’t worry. After five more kills, I’ll let you join the fray. You’ll level up in no time, and I’ll always be there to keep you safe. You can trust me. Unlike some bastards, I care about everyone in my party.”

“Thank you, Severus. I’m really glad I was paired up with you.”

The two continued to walk with only a short distance between them. Before long, they had found a trail of goblin footprints, which continued along one of the walls and across a narrow bridge over a lava pool. As he crossed this bridge, Vance was tempted to push Severus into the lava, but he never got the chance, because he always needed to focus on balancing himself. On the other side, the goblin footprints converged with numerous others and headed into a different tunnel. The impressions in the pebbly ground indicated that there were tens of goblins ahead, but neither Severus nor Vance seemed the least concerned by this fact—each, of course, for a different reason.

“How long have you been an adventurer, Severus?” Vance said, as he walked.

“Longer than I can remember,” Severus replied. “But it was never my main thing. I took it seriously only after my first Ascension.”

“You must have a lot of stories to tell.”

“A few. If you buy me a drink, I can tell you some.”

“Nothing’s for free?” Vance laughed.

“Only good booze can get my lips loose.”

“What about advice?” Vance said. “Do you offer it for free?”

“I’ll put it on your tab. What do you wanna ask?”

“You said you’d let me level up today.”

“I did, my friend.”

“I’ll get 25 stat points per level, correct?” Vance said.

“Correct.”

“So I was wondering about how I should spend them. I read several guides, but none of them seemed useful. I’m kinda lost.”

Severus laughed for the first time in a while and said, “All stat distribution guides belong in the trash.”

“You can’t be serious,” Vance laughed.

“I’m dead serious,” Severus rejoined. “Don’t let anyone dictate how you grow or fight. You should discover your own way.”

“But these guides are proven to work.”

“Trust me, they turn you into a run-of-the-mill adventurer. No guide can capture the complexity and variety of the real world. What did you say your class was?”

“Spectral Assassin,” Vance said.

“Well, I don’t know much about it, so let me speak about Necromancers instead.” Severus stopped and turned to look at Vance. “Guides tell you to raise your Intelligence as a Necromancer. Just your Intelligence. They tell you to ignore all your other stats and depend on the rest of your party for protection. But that never works.”

“Have you tried it?”

“I did. And almost died,” Severus said, with scorn and resentment that were directed at his past self. “I was abandoned in the heart of Blackmoss Forest. I hid in a tree trunk for three days as the Royal Moths buzzed around me. I could’ve died there, but I managed to escape. And when I got back home, I vowed I’d never follow a guide again. I spent points on my Endurance and Magic Resistance. Everyone laughed at me when they heard that, but I didn’t care. And at my first Ascension, I had the last laugh.”

“What happened at your first Ascension?”

“Well, aren’t you a nosy one?” Severus laughed again. “I unlocked two Perks that were real game-changers.”

“What do they do?”

“They give me good buffs,” Severus said tersely.

Fuck. He hedged. Vance regretted asking such a direct question. But at least I confirmed that he spent points on Endurance and Magic Resistance.

“Anyway,” Severus said, as he continued to walk, “I’m much more powerful than a normal Necromancer. I discovered my own way, and you should discover yours.”

“You’re right,” Vance smiled. But his smile hid both anger and frustration.

“Now, enough talk,” Severus said. “I think we found the goblin nest.”

A wooden gate materialized from behind a steamy veil, and several human skulls appeared across the wall above it—a clear warning to all intruders not to wander beyond this point. Severus, however, defied this loud admonition and ordered his salamanders to burn the gate down. It wasn’t long before it had turned into ashes and cinders, and even the skulls that hung above it tumbled to the ground and broke into tiny shards.

As the smoke dispersed, a meandering maze of vein-like tunnels took shape. Each tunnel was lined with small wooden huts and straw beddings. Goblins built their nests in such a way so that they would be easily defendable. Having a single gate into their settlement meant that they needed to garrison only one front. And building their houses in branching tunnels meant that they would never be wiped out: a hypothetical attacker would need to choose a single route to launch an attack, and while this attacker explored the chosen route, the luckier goblins would have a chance to escape unnoticed. Casualties would arise, but the tribe would survive and resettle in a different location. This was the strategy that the weak goblins employed to survive in the world of the strong. And as long as there weren’t enough enemies to attack all tunnels simultaneously, it worked perfectly.

Neither Vance nor Severus were familiar with this piece of goblin ingenuity, so they didn’t think much when they found the branching tunnels, and they followed the leftmost path without basing their choice on much more than a whim. Soon they found their first opponent—one of several goblins that had to buy time for the rest of the tribe to escape. Vance watched the pitiful monster snarl savagely and drum on its green belly. Then he also watched as the undead salamanders cornered it and burned it alive. As the flames engulfed its body, it scratched the stone walls and broke all its fingernails in agony. Then it stopped struggling and embraced death with an expression of horror frozen on its face.

“Ha ha! I got my second kill,” Severus said.

His Intelligence jumped to 205.

After several minutes, another valiant goblin stepped out of the dark and stood in the path of the bloodthirsty Necromancer. It tried to use a one-handed ax to decapitate its reptilian opponents, but the salamanders whipped their tails to disarm it and chewed its neck into a disturbing mince.

“Third kill!”

210.

Another goblin jumped down from a hut and tried to stab Severus with a poisoned dagger, but the Necromancer avoided the attack with a backward step. The salamanders scurried to defend their master. And the goblin met with an atrocious fate—immobilized by the massive weight of one opponent, it watched its lower body get eaten before it bled to death.

“Fourth kill!”

215 … So it’s now increasing 5 points per kill.

Vance could no longer tell whether he was sweating because of the heat or the stress. The situation was nightmarish. Nothing could make it better, except a single message—an announcement that he almost lusted for with un-Platonic thirst. But he was too afraid to check the ongoing countdown to it. Time passed excruciatingly slowly, and he continued to suffer, amid the agonizing wails of the goblins, until he finally heard the liberating words.

Status Alert You have recovered from Mana Poisoning.

Finally! Vance felt a surge of energy throughout his body. 13 more minutes. I only need 13 more minutes.

As Vance celebrated his timely recovery, Severus was also in the mood for celebration. Although his face was straight and his expression emotionless, he turned to Vance and said with a tone that betrayed some excitement, “How about we do something fun for my fifth kill?” And he pointed at a straw bed where a mother-child pair of goblins were cowering in paralyzing fear. “It seems they couldn’t run away in time.” He had already ordered his salamanders to surround the miserable pair. “I got this idea from you, Vance. Remember when you told me to raise a goblin? I’ll do it now.”

One of the salamanders wrapped its tail around the mother goblin. A short struggle ensued as the mother squirmed and screamed, but the effort didn’t amount to much, because the grip of the tail was too strong. The salamander spun the mother goblin around in the air and threw it against a wall. It fell to the ground and tried to crawl back to its child, but before it could even make it back to the straw nest, the salamander had tackled it with its armored back and squashed its body against the stone wall. A second tackle. A third tackle. A fourth. Every time, the goblin mother tried to return to its weeping child, and every time, the salamander denied it the simple wish.

The fifth tackle was the last. With it came the sound of shattering bone; with it came a gush of visceral blood. The mother goblin breathed its final breath and lay still on the ground with an arm extended toward its child. And the child stopped weeping and looked at its mother’s bleeding corpse—with a blank expression that was the epitome of despair.

220.

“And that’s my fifth kill,” Severus announced in triumph. “But the real fun starts now.” He fired a sphere of blue mist and raised the mother goblin from the dead. “Dance! Dance! Dance!” Severus clapped in amusement, and the corpse started to jump around like a frolicsome puppy. The show lasted for a few minutes before Severus said, “Now for the finale.” He took out his steel dagger and tossed it at the mother’s feet. “Watch closely, Vance. It’s gonna pick it up and kill its own child.” Severus laughed. “It’s a shame goblins can’t talk. Imagine if we got the little one to beg for its life.”

Equip Spectre. A gray-green semi-transparent dagger formed in Vance’s right hand. Its handle was shrouded in a dark mist, and its smooth tapering blade didn’t reflect any light. Spectral Execution. The dark mist erupted, covering the entire length of Vance’s arm and part of his torso.

Armed with the steel dagger, the goblin mother loomed before its child.

Armed with the spectral dagger, Vance loomed behind Severus.