Me POV:
“Ah, hell.”
Of all the things to happen today, it just had to be this. When you think of how it is that your journey across the unruly countryside in an age of magic and blades; you think of running into bandits, tribes of murderous werebeasts, a cult of dwarvish heretics, maybe some dyads if you're lucky, a conclave of vampires or succubi if you’re really lucky.
But no, I just had to have my horse, along with all my supplies, tent, money and MAP mind you, get struck by fucking lightning. If I wasn’t going to take a piss, I would be just as charred as my most faithful companion in this world. Since when does lightning hit a horse in the middle of a fucking forest anyway?!
“Teacher! I did it! I really did it!” Lady Fuck Bitch
“Don’t get ahead of yourself just yet kid.” Mistress Fuck Bitch
‘Oh, that’s how… magic… FUCK!!!’
Some rustling in the underbrush as well as an effeminate shriek sound behind me. I am still kneeling and staring at the corpse of my, sad as I am, best friend. Mind you I won the horse in a card game about a month ago.
I need to find some new friends.
Preferably sentient ones.
“Oh! I- uh- well- good morning?” Mistress Fuck Bitch
“Yeah.” Me
I nod my head, still not turning away from the scene in front of me.
“That was you--” Mistress Fuck Bitch
“Transportation, supplies,*sigh* livelihood...” Me
I trail off as my mind finally begins to work out the shock and come to realize just how utterly fucked I am. My current funds along with my instruments were on Perseus, my horse, my friend. I’m a bard by trade, but a bard can only entertain so much without any instruments. And without a horse you can’t escape the city whenever you get into mischief; thankfully the biggest problem I ever had was that one time every innkeep and tavern owner in Fergum pooled their money together for an assassin. That was a little excessive.
‘I mean their daughters only bragged about me bedding them! I’m still a fucking virgin for fucks sake! The only reason those bastards even had enough coin to hire the assassin was because of the business I brought in!’
“Do you want a ride to the nearest city? We were just about to head to Nurnia.” Mistress Fuc-- Opportunity
I turn my head around and am honestly pleased by the sight. The lady I assumed to be the Master was an elf, meaning her age was undeterminable from a glance. She had a slender body type and a decent face, along with decent proportions, something most elves had a good amount of trouble with. Her eyes were green, along with 99% of the elvish population, long, sleek, oaky brown hair, and pale skin.
Her student was your average prepubescent human with a wizard's staff, they used these for precision casting. After all, it doesn’t help when your lightning bolt just goes straight back into the ground, now does it?
She had light brown hair and topaz eyes, like most magical humans her eye color had changed to match her highest affinity, along with a face still rich in baby fat.
The Elf wore rugged leather mercenary gear with a green underlay, which has the possibly intentional property of accentuating her assets in tandem to her figure; actually it was probably intentional due to the horrible case of vanity most Elves suffer from, but god are they self concious, so much so that they can get pretty cute on occasion. She had what looked like your standard elvish sabre strapped to her waist, as well as a whip
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Kinky.
The student had on grey robes that covered everything, so no descriptions on that front. Just the staff as well, again nothing besides the glowing topaz crystal and white staff to describe.
“You’re traveling mercenaries, right? As in you go travel from city to city in search of work, materials and training? As it would seem, you owe me. Big time. But we are both in luck, as it were. My name is John, and I am a bard; as well as an above average camp hand. I accompany you on your journey and offer my services as payment. Deal?” John
‘Please say yes, Please say yes, Please say yes, Please say yes, Please say yes, Please say yes, Please say yes.’
“Can you make decent food?” Elf
“YES!!” John
‘Okay that was probably a bit too loud.’
Both look a little startled, but the grumbling of their stomachs soon changes that. They look down, embarrassed.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
After an hour of close observation to make sure that I wouldn’t poison the food, we came across the most sensitive subject in my arsenal, my cloak and mask. I say mask, but it’s actually a thin layer of linen reaching down from the top of my cloak to the bottom. I can see through easily, due to a multitude of reasons, but others can’t see in
“So are you ever going to take those off?” Elsa
Also, as it turns out, the Elf’s name is Cassandra and the Human’s name is Elsa.
“No.” John
“But isn’t it--” Elsa
“No.” John
She gets a slightly ticked off expression, while Cassandra has a knowing glint in her eyes whilst stifling a chuckle.
“Why are y--” Elsa
“No, no, no, and lemme check on that one, NO. I don’t mean to be rude, but the cloak is a topic I will most likely never get into you for the remainder of your lifetime.” John
‘Ah, fuck. That was too much info.’
Cassandra perks up at this.
“Oh, so you aren’t human then? Do tell, do tell.” Cassandra
‘Well there goes that opportunity. I need to control tongue slips like this in the future better.’
I let out a dejected sigh at the prospect of this entire escapade being wasted.
*sigh*
I pick up my pack and start walking down the road towards Nurnia. At least I was trying to before the duo literally materialized in front of me in a praying position.
“We’re sorry, we won’t ask any personal information!” Elsa
“This is the first time in months when I didn’t want to hurl everything I ate on the road! I am not going back to lightning cooked deer!” Cassandra
Elsa shifts her head to look at Cassandra, a hurt expression on her face.
“Hey it wasn’t that bad!” Elsa
“Less back talk more groveling!” Cassandra
‘Oh, so they’re the type of adventurer that is in it for the fame and glory, but forgets to bring someone along who is capable of cooking or cleaning. Not the first ones I’ve met and certainly not the last.’
“This is going to be a long journey…” John