Amdirlain’s PoV - Limbo - Monastery of Will’s Hand
When Liranë turned up to the training hall for the morning session on exam day, Amdirlain smiled teasingly at her. “I’m uptight about my examination, Master Liranë. Do you think I’ve got a chance of passing?”
Liranë expression became a mock-glare, and she cocked her head at Amdirlain. “Know Novice Amdirlain that I could always recommend your expulsion for excessive competence in the Martial Arts.”
“That would be lovely, then I’d get out of all my exams,” laughed Amdirlain.
A spark of amusement quickly spoiled Liranë’s stern gaze. “Know that the review process will take until the next rest day, so you’ll still have to undertake this quarter’s exams. But do you think anyone would take that reason seriously?”
Affecting a pout, Amdirlain crossed her arms in a huff. “Well, that’s not fair.”
“Know that since you’re worried about your exams, I’ll have to be extremely thorough in evaluating you.”
“We don’t have three days to spar again, do we?”
“Know I’ve learned a technique to assist, so I won’t require hydration next time.”
Liranë’s review of her Zerthi forms didn’t take long, and she sent her off to a language exam where her knowledge of Gith made it simple—though structuring her responses properly still didn’t come automatically. Lunch passed amid a hushed room, only disturbed by tense whispers and exchanged reminders.
When they arrived for the first of the afternoon’s examinations, a psi-crystal almost the size of her torso floated above Master Duurth’s table which had a few open boxes spread out across its surface. Amid the crystal’s internal structure, Amdirlain could feel a strange but simple awareness she’d never felt in their training aids. Three figures formed of ectoplasm stood beyond the table, and Amdirlain could feel their simple biology and mindless state.
As soon as the last Novice arrived, Duurth began with his instructions. “Know that all attack or distraction techniques need to be targeted at the psi-crystal or a training construct. Know these are more complex versions of the tools you normally use and will illuminate to show the strength and nature of the technique contacting it.”
Collecting a box from the table, he floated it past Lezekus at the end of the row. Drawing a token from it, she grimaced and flashed it down the line to show she’d drawn number one. Duurth had already continued the box along the line, but Lezekus stood up and took up a position near the objects laid out for the examination.
When the box skipped past Amdirlain, she looked at Duurth curiously.
“Know that since you have the most techniques to display, you will go last,” stated Duurth, and Amdirlain just nodded her acceptance.
Observing the Novices, all started with Far Hand, they then moved on to various techniques they’d learned for their path plan. Each technique targeted at it made the psi-crystal glow in different shades, with the intensity ranging from a firefly to a brilliant glow. While other techniques opened or sealed wounds on a training construct or moved one about the room.
When Duurth waved Amdirlain forward, the psi-crystal emulating mental structures glowed to show Distraction then Taunt hit home even before she’d reached the examination position. The mental assaults of Cloud Mind, Id Insinuation, and Mental Disruption caused various hues to appear within the crystal’s depths, and Duurth calmly made notes. When Psionic Blast filled it with a burst of light, he gave her a nod and motioned her to continue.
A construct echoed wounds she shared with Hostile Empathic Transfer. Of those, she sealed some with its Empathic Transfer before the rest closed as Biofeedback shared her regeneration. A moment later, the wounds reopened when Recall Agony undid the healing from herself and the others before she threw a Crystal Knife formed by Metacreativity. She followed in rapid succession with a propelled Crystal Shard and then a Swarm of Crystals’ manifestation. Coating the ground with Ectoplasm Patch, she hit a target with Dismiss Ectoplasm that evaporated it along with the patch and the two designated friendly, which earned her a frown.
A Mind Link allowed Duurth to observe the results of each Clairsentience and non-combat Telepathy techniques connecting her to others. Next came reading objects Duurth handed to her, using the Psychometry and Crafter’s Insight techniques to determine their history and the abilities embedded in them. While she could tell she didn’t get all the details, she got more than apparently Duurth had expected from the way his eyebrows raised.
Using some Psychometabolism techniques on herself had given her the greatest challenge, so instead she showed them by applying them to Lezekus and Nomein, who’d both volunteered. The tired girls had their health revitalised by Vigor, and Power Transfer topped up their Psi reserves from Amdirlain’s still greater reserves. Then Harden Flesh made their gathering up glass shards from the box risk-free before Amdirlain used Repair Damage, and the pieces formed themselves into a sphere.
Amdirlain raised an eyebrow at the bauble gleaming in Nomein’s hand before fixing Duurth with a look. “Yes, Master Duurth, I can now fix crushed balls.”
Her words had Lezekus coughing to conceal laughter as Amdirlain continued with her techniques. Her use of Energy Adaptation let Nomein withstand a burst of heat when Duurth melted the sphere. Skate let her slip across the room to the other in a single gliding motion, while Deflect smacked another bauble Nomein tossed at her back straight onto the floor. Detect Teleport let her point in the direction that Duurth had teleported it away when she turned around. Hinder slowed Nomein’s attempt to return to her seat with every step in slow motion despite her efforts to walk normally. Before she could sit down, at last, Dimension Swap had Nomein standing across the room, where Amdirlain had been a moment earlier.
Turning her back to Nomein’s seat, Amdirlain swapped them again to let her sit at last. Lock secured the token box Duurth had used earlier despite it having no mechanism; instead, it stayed closed by a psionic seal formed by Psychoportation. Unlock broke the seal on a waxed parchment, then a psionic-sealed box, and unlocked a drawer.
When Duurth manifested a Crystal Spear that flew towards her, Time Hop phased Amdirlain out, then back into, the time stream moments forward from when she’d been. Then Dimension Slide put her on the far side of the room, the line-of-sight technique not something she planned to need. Though it had an advantage in that most magic—and even some psionic—barriers couldn’t block if she could see past them, unlike her Spells or Powers. However, the main purpose of learning it was to provide a thorough grounding for the next technique—Dimension Door—that moved her into the corridor.
When she opened the door to come back in Duurth raised his eyebrows. “Know that today’s exam only required you to show your understanding of techniques up to and including tier 3; Dimension Door is tier 4.”
“I put too much force into Dismiss Ectoplasm, so I thought I’d show something I knew I could get right,” offered Amdirlain hopefully.
“Know I hope you still have reserves for the rest of your Psychoportation and Telekinesis demonstrations,” said Duurth when she closed the door behind her. The three Ectoplasm constructs reformed in their original positions, and he motioned her to continue.
Far Hand lifted ten glass baubles from their case and held them in mid-air before the table. They made an easy target for Matter Agitation to melt en masse, and it sent molten glass pouring towards the floor. Puddled on the stone, Energy Ray sent a burst of cold that set them back to glass that quickly flew towards her under Telekinetic Force’s control. Reaching out a fingertip, a pulse of the Hammer technique shattered the mass before Telekinetic Thrust flung the shards into the closest construct.
Concussion Blast drove the slivers further into it and set the barrier Duurth held before the students pulsing. Its echo stilled by Control Sound before Energy Push sent a jet of flames at the mauled construct. The burning material was snuffed out by Control Flames before Energy Stun caused a burst of electricity in the surrounding air that sizzled across the fluid dripping from its wounds. An Energy Bolt sent a small lightning bolt from her hand to smash against it with enough force to drive it alone into the back wall.
Last but not least, Dispel Psionics broke the barrier when she felt Duurth stop maintaining it, and Amdirlain returned to her seat.
Duurth didn’t keep them waiting and passed out the results immediately from his notes. Though a few didn’t score as well as they’d like, everyone still scored more than enough to pass. Fortunately, not all the day’s tests were as dramatic or as draining. Certainly, the last tests of the day in Githzérai history, and maths were a cakewalk, and Amdirlain headed back to her training hall, leaving the others still in the exam room.
* * *
She hadn’t expected his presence in the training hall, but Master Cyrus looked up at Amdirlain’s entry with a grin. “Master Âdaka mentioned your eyes were glowing before the morning’s session. What did your pattern turn out to be?”
“A Phoenix burning on its pyre,” admitted Amdirlain.
“Why would the Phoenix burn on a pyre?” asked Cyrus in confusion. “The South Wind is Immortal and immune to mundane flames since it’s a greater aspect of yang.”
Waving off his protests, Amdirlain tried to remember if she’d ever read about Phoenix mythology but came up blank, other than a few movies and game statistics. “We’re talking about a different Phoenix. In the legends where I’m from, the Phoenix dies in a fire and is reborn in a continual cycle. I think every thousand years it perishes, and from the ashes an egg forms. I’m sure there are other meanings behind it, but that’s all I remember. Certainly, it’s not a greater Shen like the South Wind.”
“Such a tale sounds familiar but is eluding me at present. A creature continually walking the wheel of life sounds like a good portent to have your pattern contain. Continually reborn, able to put the struggles of its past life behind it, and rise from its ashes anew. A cycle of rebirth and purification by fire, perhaps? It has been a day of exams for you, has it not? I suggest you sit for a while before your evening meal with the Novices and cycle.”
“You just want to observe its manifestation,” guessed Amdirlain, and gave Cyrus a suspicious look.
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“I did show you mine,” declared Cyrus in mock-offence, and his eyebrows leapt upwards at Amdirlain’s outburst of gleeful laughter.
When her laughter settled, she focused on the pattern and almost lost control when another fit of giggles hit. She steadied herself with the three months of nightly practice and set the Ki through the pattern. The Ki had it blazing even to regular sight the moment it completed, and the wings raised skywards amid the flames.
“I understand now. Your legend is like the Persian Phoenix, but it’s been hundreds of mortal lifetimes since I’d heard that tale last. They’re said to live an endless cycle of life, death, creation, and destruction. It is a creature of beauty, kindness, and goodness that lives beyond the sun’s brilliance, only venturing into the mortal realm when its time draws close.”
“But weren’t you originally Persian?” asked Amdirlain. “I would have thought you’d be more aware of that tale, though I can understand the Four winds take precedence for you now.”
“While our order existed in Persia nominally, the monasteries were on the eastern edge of the lands claimed by the Persian Empire. The surrounding lands were more influenced by Zhōnghuá culture than by the Empire and the Pantheon that held sway over most of its people. It is part of the reason we moved the villagers through the heavenly gate, rather than follow the Empire’s plan,” explained Cyrus, and waved off Amdirlain’s attempt at a question. “Such is a mundane and old political matter. I’m more interested in your Phoenix.”
“What are your thoughts on it?”
“Well, the version I’m familiar with is different; rather than the egg forming from the ashes, after emerging from its predecessor’s remains, the new phoenix carves a cremation egg from a lump of myrrh. The egg is hollowed out, and the ashes interred within it. They took the creature as a symbol of renewal and rebirth. The ability to rise again despite life’s setbacks is among its attributes. It must have been a relief to see your Soul finds inspiration in such a symbol.”
Amdirlain rubbed her neck ruefully, and Cyrus fixed her with a probing stare. “My first thought was it ending up like ashes on the pyre. Seeing its destruction made me wonder if I’d ever died a peaceful death.”
His stare eased at her admission, and Cyrus’ tone softened reassuringly. “That is not how I see the symbol, the blaze of the flames, and the feathers speaks of fierceness. The ashes are not the end; they are the beginning of the next. For the Phoenix, the blaze is a peaceful death. It dies in the fire at the time of its choosing, having lived a full life.”
“I’ll admit-”
“All you saw is the destruction. I hope that is only because you’re still dealing with your pain, but time meditating is the only way you’ll learn for sure,” Cyrus interrupted and patted her shoulder.
Amdirlain flinched back even as she registered there wasn’t an ounce of pain from his touch. “Your touch didn’t hurt me.”
He gave her an amused smile and waved a finger. “You assumed it would after our first meeting, but you never asked what I’d been doing when I touched you.”
“Your touch and opening your third eye were both agonising,” declared Amdirlain, remembering his explanation.
“Yes, I touched you while my Ki State was active and used a power that has destroyed many of the Yomi King’s demons. While it was agony for your flesh, you didn’t explode or even endure lasting harm.”
Amdirlain fixed him with an incredulous look. “All this time, I’ve avoided sparring with you because contact would be painful.”
“If you’d been sparring with me, you wouldn’t have been spending time in meditation. After your explanation upon declining, I saw no need to correct your assumptions. Now cycle your Ki again. You’ve only just impressed the pattern, so while your Ki capacity has likely increased, there are still gains in that regard. Also, until you-”
“So about sparring,” interjected Amdirlain hopefully.
“-get towards the point of being able to cycle your Ki continually through the pattern; it won’t be as useful to you for recovery. Or enable you to try the past life technique,” continued Cyrus, and gave her a smile. “I’m sure Liranë provides you a suitable challenge.”
As if the mention of her name had summoned her, Liranë opened the door to the training hall and looked between them upon entering the room. Ignoring the glance she directed their way, Amdirlain continued with their conversation.
“But-”
Cyrus fixed her with a reproving look and waved her off. “You are as bad as the Dark Warrior’s disciplines, solely focused on the Martial Arts, and expanding the skills that aid them in battle.”
“I live a dangerous existence,” argued Amdirlain.
“This will help you develop a greater Ki strength, recover Ki faster, and gain a deeper understanding of yourself. It should also help your Psi reserves if you cycle them through the pattern.” noted Cyrus and motioned Amdirlain to go meditate. “Go on, I know a battle addict when I see one. You avoid the pain inside yourself by focusing on immediate external threats or challenges.”
“I’ve been getting better,” argued Amdirlain, and folded her arms rather than move to her meditation spot.
“No, you’ve been healing from damage you’ve taken but not yet found the sources of your pain,” countered Cyrus.
The explorations that had found the Elven form immediately came to mind at Cyrus’ statement. “Do you know anything about punishments branded onto a Soul?”
Cyrus had motioned her to meditate yet again, but stopped at her words. “Only true savages would do such a thing. A Soul might Damn itself to their Pantheon’s Hell, but others shouldn’t be branding Souls.”
“I’ve found a past life in my Mind Palace but she’s wrapped up in strange metal vines studded with thorns and spikes. No matter what I do, I can’t seem to get a single one free of its form,” explained Amdirlain.
“Perhaps when I’ve earned your trust, you can show me,” suggested Cyrus, and seeing Amdirlain’s sceptical reaction, he snorted. “Though most likely I’d say it will need to wait until you have the past life meditations working, and you might find out how to free yourself of it. Why do you believe it’s a brand on the Soul? It could just represent pain that life’s memories contain.”
“I was told they branded her in a fashion that imprinted the punishment on the Soul to prevent removal. It showed on the flesh looking like this tattoo of flowering vines with thorns and spikes,” recounted Amdirlain and rubbed her fingers across where the tattoo showed on her palm.
Cyrus extended his hand, and she set her palm up on his own, so he could look the tattoo over.
“I’d caught glimpses of it but find it disturbing that a monstrous act provides such a beautiful presentation. Your Mind Palace is perhaps showing you how you perceive it, but still such a thing is barbaric! A Soul should always be allowed to redeem itself in another life. Such an action might well have scarred all future lives by the pain your Soul carried between lives. Why punish a Soul that isn’t enlightened and might never remember its past lives in such a way?” asked Cyrus, gently releasing her hand.
“I could argue that with some Souls, but they had rites that restored past life memories when the children reached adulthood,” objected Amdirlain, wondering why his words sparked a defensive surge within her.
“Still barbaric, even more so given they force an unenlightened Soul to remember its past mistakes instead of allowing it to learn the lessons in its new life,” argued Cyrus. “Speaking of which, learn the lesson of your pattern and go practice cycling Ki.”
“Yes, Master Cyrus,” huffed Amdirlain playfully.
“I’ve told you before about titles,” Cyrus grumbled, and beckoned Liranë to resume whatever sparring they’d been doing.
Amdirlain gave him an amused looked and pointed at Liranë. “You use them for the other masters.”
“I use their rank since I’m here in the monastery, but I’m not a member of this monastery,” replied Cyrus, his dodging unaffected by responding to Amdirlain’s argument. “See how many times you can repeat the pattern, keep the points lit, and I’ll warn you if you press too far.”
Kneeling by the entry, Amdirlain started the Ki cycling again. The energy infused the starting point and with the practice of casting thousands of spells, she wove a course between the rest. Months of working out the pattern had the process take only minutes, but still it drew in the same amount of Ki as the first time. Even as the Phoenix flared and the energy rushed back into her pool, Amdirlain was already pouring it into the first key point. The scent of the ashes from the pyre was so real it tickled within her memory, and thousands of distant fires burned within her mind’s eye.
The taste of the fires so far distant tickled across her taste buds, echoing back to the ash soaked air of that last Sydney day. Again the pyre surged into life, with the Phoenix arching its wings, a rush of power returning to the pool cut it a hair deeper. Ignoring the energy coursing through her, the pattern held the vague memories of living quickening breaths brushing under her skin, ashes drifting like snowflakes covering all in the record of destruction before the Ki’s waters washed her clean. The flow of the power kept the world distant from her and even though she registered an exchange between Cyrus and Liranë, her focus didn’t truly shift from cycling Ki.
The chimes rang for dinner while Amdirlain was cycling through a sixth time and Liranë started forward to put a hand on her shoulder only for Cyrus to stop her. “She needs this far more than pretending to require sustenance from food.”
“Know it’s part of her routine-”
“Yet they continually adjust her routine depending on Elliyna’s need to rest. This will help her far more than Elliyna’s discussion right now.”
“Then why didn’t you tell her that-”
“I told her to see how many times she could repeat the pattern. You can either go to dinner or remain, but I’ll watch to make sure the Ki doesn’t threaten her control. It won’t be long before she’s overflowing with Ki and needs to stop.”
“Know that I’ll wait as well, but Elliyna’s session-” replied Liranë.
Cyrus just held up a hand and halted Liranë’s objections. “May have to wait until another evening depending on how strong Amdirlain’s mind truly is right now. She has a pattern of such complexity that it should have taken years, not the three months it did to discover its key points, let alone trace it out—especially given the level of frustration it should have invoked. Perhaps I should have asked her about her Skill in Meditation.”
“Know from what she has told me, Meditation isn’t what she uses. She told me she gained a Power called Harmony that absorbed Meditation and provides a greater result.”
Cyrus glanced between them and settled on the floor cross-legged. “Well, that changes things. We could be here all night.”
“Know that Elliyna-”
“Will have to wait. In doing this, she’ll be helping to ease her injuries and potentially find inner truths,” declared Cyrus. “The Jade Emperor directed me to assist her, and I will do so to the best of my ability, that I promise upon his Name and my Immortality.”
“And if your ability is not enough?”
“Then I will learn as well, and do better to assist,” said Cyrus.
“Know I’ve dealt with my own mental injuries in the past for you to act as though this is a cure-all,” grumbled Liranë, momentarily at a loss for words.
“It is not a cure, but certainly a powerful tool to help,” consoled Cyrus.
“You can tell Master Elliyna,” whispered Amdirlain, her focus still on cycling. As she started another, it felt like the Ki started flowing across the dry, rock strewn lake bed within her Mind Palace, and she stopped paying attention to them altogether.
The cycles of Ki shaved the depth of her Ki pool a hair breadth deeper each time, but the slow increase in it wasn’t enough to prevent it straining against the boundary of her skin, and the Mantle glowed in her awareness. The Mantle's strands swaying in the breeze bent strangely towards her against the wave of Ki she first shared with it. Her small picnic blanket in that perception of a sea of grass expanded slowly but steadily, increasing half again in size from the first time. On the second, a boundary seemingly a metre wide grew around it before her blanket’s space grew further, allowing her psyche a clear separation from the Mantle’s press. Unaware of the energy that washed down into the Domain’s Wellspring, to trigger further buildings to grow, she continued cycling the energy’s flow providing a timeless tranquility.
Cyrus observed her caramel skin take on a lustre of shining gold that drained away before he could prompt her to stop. The second time it occurred, he opened his third eye enough to observe the energy’s torrent, being careful to evoke no pressure on her form and backed carefully away from what was before him. The Domain’s wellspring was aware of him even as he glimpsed the protective Souls in its depths staring back.
As the night grew later Liranë left Cyrus to watch over her and returned the next morning to find neither had moved. Amdirlain’s flesh shone bright white-gold, and the energy within was melting vague obstructions to its flow before the energy faded and her flesh returned to normal.
“Has she rested at all?”
“No, and each cycle, the Ki’s pressure builds ever higher, then suddenly it drains away somehow before she reaches a dangerous point.”
Liranë fixed Cyrus with a sceptical glare. “Somehow?”
“I’m not sure how she’s doing it, but she’s sending the Ki somewhere that has Souls resting at peace within it. I’ve seen nothing like it,” admitted Cyrus.
“Know that sounds like Amdirlain then,” laughed Liranë, and knelt down beside Cyrus to observe Amdirlain. “Know I believe some Novices are waiting for her.”
“Let them know she’ll be awhile. She’s stopped even bothering to fake her breathing—I’m not sure time’s passage means anything to her.”
“What do you mean, fake her breathing?” asked Liranë, snapping her focus to Cyrus.
Cyrus fixed her with a look of surprise. “You don’t even know what Amdirlain is? I know many are unaware, but I don’t know who knows what around here. I think you either need to speak to Master Jarithä or ask Amdirlain once she’s stopped cycling Ki.”
“Should we get her to stop?”
“Don’t be silly. Normally this would be a closed chamber exercise and the practitioner left to surface only when their insights prompted them,” dismissed Cyrus. “However many days, months, or even years it took.”
“Know that Master Tenzin might have something to say about her avoiding classes tomorrow—she’s very protective of her Novices,” warned Liranë.
An unconcerned shrug from Cyrus drew a hard stare from Liranë. “If she’s that protective, she’ll want the best for her, and this Ki cycling will help her Soul heal. Though she did come by last night to check on her.”