19:41 23/04/2587 –(8734/671/75/12)

Erilur had wanted to meet Gabriel alone, and wasn’t that a queer notion. She would be leaving tomorrow, and Gabriel was sad about that, more so than he thought he would. Gabriel had returned from a party he and Risoti had organised for Erilur. It was a private but lavish affair, with everyone paying towards it to make it as special for Erilur as possible.

Erilur had said she would be at his apartment at half-past seven, but the Ponut’kild was fashionably late as always. Gabriel was contemplating whether or not to make himself a drink when the doorbell rang.

“Just eleven minutes late; she’s on fire today,” Gabriel said, pushing the button to unlock the front door.

She passed through the threshold and removed her mask. “Ah, I do so love being able to move my jaw,” Erilur said.

“Want a drink?” asked Gabriel, gesturing to the kitchen.

“Sure, I’ll have a tea again, please. It grows on you,” replied Erilur, “like most human food, now that I think about it, is that your diabolical plan to conquer the galaxy, get us all addicted to your produce.”

Gabriel chuckled and replied, “Uh, yeah, galactic domination is taught right after maths class.”

Erilur wagged her tail, and the pair sat down at the table. Once the drinks were produced, Gabriel asked, “why did you want to meet me in private? I would have thought you wanted to spend your last night with Risoti.”

“Oh, I will be, but there is something I need to do first, and this is my last chance,” Erilur replied, taking a sip of her piping hot drink.

“No cryptic speech please; I’m too tired for it,” Gabriel replied, rubbing his eyes. Their party might have been private, but Erilur had a taste for loud music with a lot of bass; he could still feel the beat in his skull if he remembered hard enough.

Erilur gently slapped her tail against her chair and said, “Very well.”

Rapping her claws against her mug Erilur took the time to compose herself, “you’ve gone through some horrible stuff, haven’t you, Gabriel?”

“My fight with the carnedon was distressing, but….” Gabriel tried to say, but Erilur held up her hand, deliberately imitating the human gesture, and Gabriel realised she had done her research.

“Please, Gabriel, we both know that’s not what I mean. You have an extreme aversion to forming attachments. I can tell because you hardly ever talk about yourself. When you do, it's always vague,” Erilur said, looking directly into his eyes, “and you rarely ask questions about other people.”

“I’m just a private person,” Gabriel replied a little too quickly, and he realised that he had just given away more than he intended.

“You are, but that’s not the reason. You enjoy spending time with us; I’ve seen you smile more the longer I have known you. Every day you laugh more, you want to get closer to us, ask us questions, know us better, but you’re afraid to do so,” countered Erilur, and Gabriel was beginning to feel this was a losing battle.

“You’re reading too much into it; I’m human. I act differently to Ponut’kild, Tufanada and Etulana,” Gabriel said, going for the most potent argument he could think of.

“Yep, you’re not wrong, but I’ve looked into it, and you are neither a- nor antisocial. This is a response, a defence mechanism, most likely to some past trauma,” Erilur explained, her voice calm but authoritative. Gabriel was slowly coming to the understanding that Erilur was a damn good psychologist.

That word, trauma, struck deep into a wound Gabriel did not realise he had, and he lashed out, though Gabriel being Gabriel, it was far more muted than he intended. “How the hell do you know?” he accused; he was getting very close to kicking her out.

Erilur took a deep breath before replying, “I’m a twin, Gabriel, I have an older brother, only by a few minutes, but still… his name is Tihoyu.”

Gabriel said nothing; he had a sinking feeling he knew where this was going.

“My big brother and me were inseparable, always did everything together, well almost everything; I went to the bathroom by myself,” Erilur said with a chuckle, and Gabriel chuckled back.

The tale has been illicitly lifted; should you spot it on Amazon, report the violation.

“Adventures too, explorers at heart, always had one another's backs,” Erilur added; she went quiet for a time, letting herself become absorbed in happy memories.

“Then, one day, we got too adventurous for our own good,” Erilur said, pulling herself out from happier days.

“We got it into our heads that climbing a pylon would be a good idea, not that we knew what it was at the time,” Erilur said; her tail went still, and she held her head, covering her eyes.

“You don’t have to finish the story,” Gabriel said, placing his hand on her arm.

Erilur looked at him and said, “thank you, but I want to.” “I say “we”, but Tihoyu quickly realised how stupid it was, but I was hopped up on Opedi berries, and I would not listen to him,” Erilur added.

Gabriel waited patiently for Erilur to finish her story, “You can probably guess what happened, I got stuck, and he immediately climbed up to get me. On the way down, I slipped and…. He saved my life by….”

Erilur tried to finish the sentence, but even now, after thirty years, she found it impossible, and the smell, it still haunted her, burning meat.

Gabriel stood up, approached Erilur and hugged her. Gabriel held her for over a minute, Ponut'kild were not one for hugs, but there was something comforting about the warmth his body provided.

“Thank you,” Erilur mumbled, patting Gabriel’s shoulder.

Stepping back, Gabriel said, “I appreciate you telling me that, but I have to ask, why?” Raising his hands to emphasise his confusion.

“You been through something terrible, and I can’t help but think it was even worse for you than for me,” Erilur explained as Gabriel sat next to her.

“The reason I asked to speak with you and told you this was not to tell you what to do; I just want you to know what I experienced and how I was able to cope and move on,” Erilur said, returning to her drink.

“I am coping just fine,” Gabriel finally admitted, reaching across the table for his own beverage.

“Yes, I can’t argue that you are remarkably well adjusted, but that’s just it; you are coping. You're not moving on from that; you’re not happy,” Erilur said, pointing at him.

“Of course not. Happiness is transitory. If you try to be happy, you will be miserable; trying to be happy is stupid,” Gabriel countered.

“So what should a person try to be?” Erilur asked without missing a beat.

“Content, if you are content, happiness will come on its own,” Gabriel explained, using a well-worn speech.

“An interesting philosophy, and not without merit,” Erilur allowed. “But my next question is, are you content? If your life carried on as it has from now until the day you die, would you be fine with that?” she asked.

Gabriel did not respond; he simply stared into his drink, looking at his reflection.

“My family is what helped me, Gabriel. We all supported one another; it helped us mourn and pick ourselves back up,” Erilur said once she realised no response was forthcoming.

“You didn’t have that, did you? I know you’ve lost someone precious to you, the most precious really,” Erilur supposed, pointing to Gabriel’s locket, hidden now beneath his shirt.

“How could you possibly know all this?” Gabriel asked; he attempted to be accusatory, but she was hitting too close to home for him to muster much effort.

“I’m very good at my job Gabriel, what happened to Tihoyu is why I became a psychologist, so I could help people get through what happened to me,” Erilur explained.

“Then it is irrelevant; even if I was willing, you will be gone tomorrow,” Gabriel said, downing the last of his drink.

Erilur took his hands and held them, “Look, I know I said I was not going to give you advice, but here’s some anyway; myself, Risoti, Nish, and especially Pista love you; if you let them in, they can help you.”

“You don’t have to tell them or me what happened, and I can tell you’ve built a wall around yourself, and you’re not ready to tear it down, but when you are, they and I will be ready to listen,” Erilur explained.

“We’ve only known each other for three weeks,” Gabriel said.

“Irrelevant; it doesn’t matter how long you’ve known someone; it matters what you did with the time,” Erilur explained.

Gabriel pulled his hand from Erilur’s grasp and began to rap his fingers against the table. He said nothing and just stared at his hands; he could not believe she was right; he would not. He was fine; he had to be fine; he would be fine; he didn’t need to do anything. Even if what she said did make sense.

***

The spaceport was busy, unsurprisingly. Families, tour groups, and single travellers on business or pleasure embarked and disembarked.

Despite the crowd and the noise, only one thing had Gabriel's attention, Erilur, who was currently holding Pista in the longest hug of their lives.

“I’m gonna miss you too,” Erilur said, rubbing her muzzle against her face as much as the mask would allow.

Even now, with the sadness of seeing her go welling up within him, Gabriel’s mind kept drifting back to what Erilur had said last night. He tried to push it from his thoughts, focusing all his attention on what was happening before him, but it wasn't easy.

Eventually, Erilur put Pista to the ground, and it was Risoti's turn. “I made you lunch, and I want you to write to me as often as you can,” she said, handing her a bag that no doubt contained the handmade meal.

“I will, and I promise to do everything I can to make this work long-distance and look into moving,” Erilur replied, rubbing her nose against Risoti’s cheek.

“Wait, what?” asked Gabriel.

“I’m looking into moving to Xorko,” Erilur explained.

“Wait, isn’t that?” Gabriel asked, pointing at Risoti.

“Well, she can hardly move to Bosd, can she,” Erilur replied, scraping her toes against the floor.

Gabriel did not reply; he just looked at the floor and kicked his toes against the ground.

“It was lovely to have met you, Erilur,” Nish said, taking advantage of the lull in the conversation.

“Well, maybe my next holiday will be on Yursu; drop by on a friend and mooch,” Erilur said, embracing Nish.

Nish trilled; she knew that hugs were not a natural thing for Erilur, and she appreciated the effort.

Last but not least, Erilur’s attention turned to Gabriel. “Think about what I said Gabriel,” Erilur said.

“Yeah,” Gabriel mumbled.

Erilur stretched out her arms, and after a brief moment of hesitation, Gabriel hugged her. “And don’t forget to have fun,” she whispered.