He hasn’t come back yet. I begged him today. I begged him to come home early because mum is sick but that bastard lied! Why the hell do I always have to deal with this?

Creek

“Jack, Honey” I look up to see my mother is standing at the doorway leaning her whole body on the door. Her hair is plastered to her pale skin, her eyes unfocused. She’s sick, very sick, I don’t know what to do…I close my eyes as cold tears fall down my flushed cheeks.

“Jack go to bed” she's closer now. I want to yell at her to tell her that I can't sleep when I know that he will get angry if he doesn’t find me awake and he will hit her, he doesn’t give a shit about her or me for that matter. But instead I open my eyes and look at her green ones they're filled with exhaustion and she smiles at me. “Mum, don't worry about me, I'll sleep after you, okay?”, she bites her lips but nods. I hold her arm and make a quick job of helping her get back into bed. We sit in silence only interrupted by a cough or the creek of the bed as she tries to get comfortable “Jack are you going to leave me?” I look at her, her brows are creased and her lips are dipping downward, her green eyes are filled with a layer of moist. I don't answer until her eyes slowly start to close and her breath evens out. That's when I say into the now silent and empty room “No mum I won’t leave you I promise”.

“Get up” I blink back my grogginess and force myself to focus on the figure

looming on top of me in the darkness

“Derek” the moment the word leaves my lips he slaps me the sound resounds in the cold silent room.

“It’s father, Jack or have you forgotten”

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My whole body tenses like a string as I bolt up. I feel myself start to shake with anger and fear. I want to scream, and claw at my skin until only bones are left but I force myself to look into his dark heartless eyes. Behind me I can feel my mother starting to stir. I force myself to calm down. I walk past him into the living room he follows. Before I can even turn around or process the hands round my waist. My spine connects to the wall. I feel it crack.

“How many times Jack do I have to give you a lesson about respect?” His voice is cold but with an undercurrent of anger I force myself up onto my knees as I wipe blood from my now split lip. I open my mouth to speak but before I can he kicks my sternum .A jolt of pain explodes in my ribs causing me to double over as the edges of my vision begin to blur my head is spinning. I brace myself against the wall and try to speak but only manage a wheeze.

He clicks his tongue “How many times Jack ?” .Silence. “ANSWER ME” tears fall down my cheeks in a steady stream I look up

“I’m Sorry, Only once Father”the words are quiet but raw he watches me coldly. Our eyes stay interlocked in the silence that follows. He studies me as if I’m merely a piece of furniture after a moment he nods satisfied

“Good” he turns around and makes his way towards the couch turning on the light as he goes, I remain kneeling, watching as he picks a show to watch. Acting like nothing even happened like he probably didn't just break my ribs. His eyes swivel towards me. He studies me but merely continues to swipe through the channels. I cough blood onto my sleeve, he watches me noting the blood but he doesn't care instead he says

“Go heat dinner for me”I feel my body start to shake. He doesn't care. In the end I’m his possession as long as he has a mother as a leverage against me, blinking back tears I nod complying with his order. As soon as I get up my knees give way I fall, my fathers eyes are on me a sense of foreboding creeps in on me before a lulling darkness comes in to claim me I see my father lean down next to me his hands lift my chin up so that he can look into my eyes I want to vomit, but his hands so warm so comforting unlike there usually harshness stop me. Looking into those eyes of his I feel my heart clench such pain and worry I have never seen in anyone but in that moment I see them in my fathers handsome face he strokes my cheek with a finger ‘I’m sorry Jack, I really am. Just a bit longer.”

Darkness clouds my vision as oblivion soft touch comes closer and closer. I whisper a prayer of absolute salvation……father………….