Although I had woken up to darkness a multitude of times, this particular awakening is not a welcome one. I was dead. Then I was in Purgatory. Then I got bound by some hooligans who wanted me for their 'young miss'. And then I almost got rescued by what I hypothesize as an Angel, but then I fainted.
Since I woke up in darkness, I am assuming that I was not successfully rescued. But I also cannot hear the annoying old bastard's voice, so I am also assuming that he is gone for the moment. I am also totally hoping that the fucker has croaked in a ditch somewhere.
With that whirlwind of events, I am more than fucking inclined to believe that as of the moment I'm not really bound to some bloody chaos prina egg thingy and instead took one too many acid tablets. If not for that maddeningly painful binding shit, I would've been certain I was tripping.Of course, the sudden appearance of this bright blue hologram-ish box in front of me only served to feed my doubts further.
New User Detected! Unlocking Origin Bonus Package... Please Stand By...
Uhh... what the fuck is this? It seems a bit too stable for a hologram, unless technology suddenly jumped quite quickly in the few months were in those South-African strife zones. The words seem familiar though. Wait... I've seen this before, where was it again? Video game dialogues? Fucking hell, I'm in a video game now?
Package Unlocked! Bonus 100 SP acquired! Bonus 400 AP acuired! New Titles Unlocked!
SP? AP? I haven't played shit in a long time but I think I still remember those. How much do I have anyway?
Would you like to access Status? Yes/No
Well that's a no brainer. But I can't speak, so... I'll just have to think my answer, then?
Yes.
Name: N/A Age: N/A Race: Primordial Chaos Dragon Egg Level: 0 Health: 10,000/10,000 +500/sec Mana: ??? Title: Dimension Traveler Vit: 1000 Tier: N/A Qi: 7/5000 The Bound One Str: 500 AP: 500 One of Origin Agi: 2 SP: 100 Mag: ???
When did I break this thing? And I really don't like the bound one thing. Also, I'm an egg. A dragon egg, apparently, but again; I am now an egg. Fuck! How can I get even with that old fart as an egg?! I am not even sure I am gonna make it till tomorrow without becoming an omelett?! I have 10,000 health? Yeah, well that old fart's abilities should be over 9,000 to just skip merrily in and out of Purgatory! Two hits, and I'm breakfast! But the magic and mana though... it's either broken, or broken. I'd prefer the latter very much, but as someone who has more experience in guns than cqc, magic is probably a better option for me, assuming that I could get it to work. Still, I need to make sure. Half-ass information is what got me killed back on Earth.
Shit! Shouldn't there be a gm function? Hello? Can't there be at least a bloody Tutorial or something?
Event: Bloody Tutorial Initiated! Be Advised: Tutorial Level has been set to the highest difficulty, as requested by user.
Oh no. Oh hell no. You have got to be fucking kidding me!
For the Bloody Tutorial, you will be transported to an isolated Event Space. Event will commence in 60 seconds!
Shit! I need a way to get away fast! Or at least even move! What the hell is with this Agi of two?! Even if I haven't played video games for years, even I know that it's bloody pathetic!.And what am I gonna do with that 500 strength?! I'm an EGG!!!
...
Based on my memories of a childhood long past, tutorials should teach a new player that basics of the game. Even if the difficulty was raised, there was no changing that… or so I thought. Until the very first thing I sensed when the countdown ended was a big ugly motherfucking armored troll slobbering at the sight of me not unlike the ones that nearly roasted a few dwarves and a hobbit.
Bloody Tutorial Stage 1 Objective: Kill Armored Trol Warchief and Proceed to next Stage.
Armored Troll Warchief... Is this suppose to replace the weak goblin or something? Really?
“EGG!”
It roared, showering the nearby surroundings with its foul sputum, and began charging at me at a speed that I would have had no way to even perceive had I not placed all my given AP to Agi. Yes, that’s right, Agi. At first it was a decision to eliminate my most glaring weakness but it turned out to be quite a good choice. Apparently, the speed increase applies to your cognitive functions as well. It doesn’t mean I’m suddenly a genius, I can just think faster. Way fucking faster. That gave me enough time to maximize the few seconds given to me before the event to strategize and prepare, and to now take full advantage of the few milliseconds I have before the troll reaches me.
And so before the fugly mofo could even touch me, I used the second most expensive skill I bought earlier, while simultaneously preparing a non-magic-reliant evasion skill, just in case my expected conjecture about my broken magic stat proved to be false.
To my relief, Blink activated and I blinked the way out of the bastard’s path. The relief was short lived however, for just before the momentum of his charge vanished Mr. Warchief suddenly glowed blood-red and charged to my direction even faster than before. Without any hesitation I immediately activated the other skill that I have prepared, Maximum Roll and wheeled out of his way, and once again began to construct the spell Blink as I did. Inwardly, I shook, if I stop or falter for but a moment, this high-speed game of tag could result to a certain troll supping on the scrambled remains of yours truly. Unless of course, my shell is harder than the ground and the rocks he keeps on pulverizing with each step he takes.
“Oogi. Want. Eat. Egg. Egg! Stop! Moving! ”
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The bastard was gasping, just a little bit more, and I would be able to safely kill him.
Uh, no thanks. But in recognition of your efforts, I will give you something to eat later. Just you wait, bastard.
I steeled mysellf to make the distance a little bit smaller, just to tantalize him enough, so that he won't have to resort to throwing rocks at mach 5, which, arguably, would be harder to survive from than this guy crashing about.
The chase kept on going, he's breaths becoming increasingly labored, until, finally, finally, he stopped to take a breather.
Hey, hey, you're tired ain't ya bastard? Ya wanna eat right? Here have a, what is it again? Chaos Ball? Seriously, who the hell named these skills? Well, this one only cost me 1 SP though, so I shouldn’t complain too much. Oogi want food? Here!
HEY OOGI! TASTE THIS!
I screamed with all the bottled up rage and impotence that had accumulated over the past few hours, cackling madly as the ball of chaotic energies grew larger and larger… and larger, without any signs of stopping.
At the sight of this, the cackling laughter died in my throat. The look of shock and resignation on my opponent’s face surely would’ve mirrored my own, if I had a face. For all that bravado and egotistical claims of mine of planning and strategizing the most ideal outcome, it seems I have forgotten to take into account my temper and my ignorance. I could only hope that this magic would either be unable to affect me, it's user, as its intrinsic property, or that my defense against magic, which would be hopefully derived from my magic stat is enough to ensure my survival.
I sigh, and as if it was waiting for it, the diusaster masquerading as the level 1 magic spell Chaos Ball exploded.
...
Meanwhile, in a parallel universe distant Plane,
Shin Ling stared vacantly at the falling leaves of the Divine Iron Bamboo. When he was but an infant, he used to chase these leaves merrily, trying to cath them all before they fall. When he was a boy, he finally managed to just that, after achieving heights in cultivation that people could only consider monstrous for his age. And when that was not enough, he sliced them apart with his slender fingers, those leaves famed to be as hard as Divine Weapons, but that was all in the distant past.
Shin Ling, the Divine Cloud of the Ninth Heaven, had fallen, and in its place was a crippled man with a crippled soul, whose injuries baffled even the wisest and most intelligent of the Healars and Alchemists.
Not long ago, he was chosen to take part in a mission of grave importance for the future of their clan, the danger, though present, was not said to present much of a threat to him, but rather towards the one he was suppose to escort, the eccentric Soulbinder Elder Song Jun.
Shin Ling was not told the specifics of the mission, only that its success is paramount to the future of their clan's young miss, his third sister, and one he extremely doted upon. While the first half of their mission was easily accomplished, Shin Ling was shocked to find that the true strength of Origin was actually far above their own realm. He had already been quite cautious when treading upon Origin, but it turned out that his caution was still far from enough. In fact, it would have been for the best if they didn't enter it in the first place. The Guardians it held were powerful beyond imagination, their appearance unlike that any he had ever seen, and their techniques, if he could still dare name something as transcendant as those actions as mere techniques, didn't even bore the slightest resemblance to the multitude he had experienced. Shin Ling was loathed to even admit it, but the presence of those Guardians alone would dwarf even The Divine King.
In stark contrast to those Guardians however, were the souls they protected. While Shin Ling saw that their sturdiness might even surpass the best of the Ninth Heaven, the energies they held were so absymal that even the cattle found in the First Firmament are even mighty in comparison. The disparity was so great that the ferocity which the Guardians wielded when a single was touched, even the one as flawed as Song Jun bound, utterly befuddled him. Even he found it miracalous that he was able to escape from with his life. As for elder Song Jun the soulbinder, Shin Ling could not even muster an iota of hope.
And as for the egg itself, their greatest failure, Shin Ling had no idea. He was certain that it made its way out of Origin, but with the Guardian's distortion, where it was sent was a mystery. Shin Ling could only hope that their clan and its allies find it before it is destroyed, or worse, be taken by the enemy clans.
He had so many regrets in regards to this entire fiasco, but the greatest of them all lay not in his failure, and shockingly, not even the tears that he had made his family shed when they saw him in his broken, seemingly irreparable state, it was the fact that his very soul was crippled to the point that he would be unable to use the myriad of insights he had gathered during that single encounter. Even in his current state, Shin Ling believed that if he's soul could at the very least regain a fraction of his ability during his prime, he would no longer be just a mere Divine Cloud, but the entirery of the Sky itself.
...
Meanwhile, in our universe a certain event space,
Stage 1 Clear! Armored Troll Warchief Defeated!
Stage 2 Clear! Cyan Sky Wolf Defeated!
Stage 3 Clear! Unique Chimaeric Cerberus Defetead!
Stage 4 Clear! Mutated White Wind Tiger Defeated!
Stage 5 Clear! Legendary Li Jen Legion Defeated!
Stage 6 Clear! Thousand-Head Hydra Defeated!
Stage 7 Clear! Mythical Astral Binder Defeated!
Calculating Total Experience... Error. Current Level Limit Reached. Further cannot be gained until after evolution. Experience Shelved For Evolution Process. New Titles Gained!
Bloody Tutorial Final Stage: Objective: Defeat Divine Astral Dragon and Survive.
Numbly, I stared as a string of blue boxes flashed before me. I had survived, but I felt at that point something else in me didn't. When the event commenced, I found myself in some sort of colliseum within what I assumed was a vast cavern. Now, well. I think I broke the entire fucking fabric of space. I mean, I don't actually know what it would look like if it broke, but I'm assuming what I'm seeing is pretty darn close. Distortions everywhere, cracks here and there where some sort of some rainbow looking stuff oozed out of. And an abyss where Oogi once stood, extending far beneath the ground. In fact.
And now, flying out of it, looking annoyingly majestic in spite of being clearly pissed off is a dragon.
The final fucking boss of the fucking tutorial.
It's not even a dragon egg like me, nor a hatchling, nor a fledgling, but a bloody full grown dragon that doesn't even have the courtesy to have a reverse scale or a glaring chink in its armor.
Truly, it's been one thing after another. And it even has a Divine something in its name. If I go by fucking video game logic, that's supposed to be some sort of World Boss material.
Well, let's hope another chaos ball could do the trick.
But then, just as I activated the skill, it and the dragon vanished.