'By the way, Young Lady Megan, I have this weird list with questions here, which I got from your friend over there.’
Michael looked from his fiance behind the glass wall to the papers he had received when he arrived, and pointed at the official behind the desk again.
‘Old Greystone gave you something? How very generous of him. Watch out that it isn’t poisoned.’
She couldn’t reach the paper through the glass, but tried to look at the paper from different angles to read it, so he took it and held it up to the glass.
‘I don’t think it’s something dangerous. It just looks like a regular paper if you ask me, all right, but what the… is this even? Questions to ask you potential Wife at the first meeting. And oh, he even gave me a pen to write the answers down and take back with me. So I can study my future Wife or so? This looks like it’s supposed to be serious business.’
‘Oh, yes, the famous first meeting questionnaire that we never get to see beforehand as girls. You’re supposed to ask the questions to get to know me. Few men ever bother with those things though.’
‘Well, it probably could help to get to know each other in some kind of way, so let’s try at least some of them.’ He said.
‘Please do, I’ve always wondered what questions were on the questionnaire. There's a lot of speculation among the girls, but so far none of the taken girls was able to get their takers to share the whole list with them.’
‘Oh, in that case I’ll make sure you get a copy. You can consider it my first deed of conspiracy against the war between the sexes, or as an early wedding present if you like.’
‘Don’t be weird and just ask the first one, I’m very curious now.’
He looked at the list and sighed. ‘Hmm. I think you really don’t want to know actually. Believe me.’
‘Tell me, I can handle it. I’m always prepared for the worst with whatever comes from a man.’
‘Hey, I didn’t write this thing. Don’t blame me just because I’m a man.’
‘No, you didn’t, but another man probably did.’
‘It could also have been a woman like your please-your-husband teacher. But okay, number one: are you ready to marry and make your husband happy? Literally the first question on the list.’
‘Sigh. You should know the answer by now. As ready as you are, Mister Real Man!’
He wrote down ‘BLAH’ in capital letters and peeked at the rest of the questions.
‘Hmm, the rest is mostly childish stuff. What’s your favourite colour and stuff like that.’
‘Do people really have a favourite colour? I wouldn’t know. Magenta red then, write it down so Greystone will be pleased with our progress as a couple…’ She giggled.
‘Favourite book?’
‘Ah, should I name of of those Nation books for girls now? I never read those.’
‘The books for boys aren’t better, believe me.’
‘I know, I tried some. Waste of good black market value. School books for boys are much more interesting and helpful, especially the advanced brainie ones. Eliza has some advanced math books and books about robotics and biology and stuff. Much more interesting than our silly domestic economics, let alone the please-your-husband stuff.’
‘So I write down “Advanced math for boys?”’
She poked with her finger to a hole in the glass. ‘Don’t. Write down “The Legends of Old Cultures”. Let me at least have that. It’s not really Wife School material, but less problematic I suppose.’
‘Interesting choice. I approve of that. And, let’s look for the next one… Where would you go if you could go on a holiday?’
‘Away from the Nation, evidently…’
‘That’s impossible. Only sea around us and no fuel in this era of a planet with depleted resources. And you’re being rebellious against our noble Nation, Miss Megan. But I assume it’s no First City Love Hotel quarter for you then?’ He said, quoting the title of a famous but unreadable book about marriage and honeymoon.
‘No, I’d stay far far away from that. And far far away from everyone who feels entitled to being pleased by me in any way. Nothing personal towards you, sorry, but a vacation is something I’d like to do for myself, and not as a pleasure toy for someone else. So some kind of small place in nature without Wife Schools or anything like that. Just rest, and a lot of books. And no-one to tell me what to do. You can visit if you behave and let me read and help me cook and clean. Next question?’
‘Eh, what makes you special?’
‘Me? That I don’t belong here at all? Special enough? It makes me rather scandalous even, but also a bit special, not? And you?’
Michael was taken aback for a second when the question was returned to him, but when he thought of it was only fair that he answered too.
‘Eh, that I don’t belong here either? I don’t know. Ask other people what they think. I’m not the best person to describe myself.’
He looked at the paper again. ‘Hmm, they try to keep the pretence of romance up with the next question: What would be the perfect date for you?’
‘Ah, one of these expensive exotic medjool thingies from Second city in the South, that grown on palms. I’ve tasted them once, very good stuff!’ She smiled teasingly now. ‘You know that’s not what they ask, Megan. Do better.’
‘Okay, man that I have to submit to, May 12th, then as the perfect date, don’t ask me why…’
He returned the smile. ‘I think I'll give up on that question for now. We’ll have to find out together. I find it a weird thing to ask at this stage. It’s not that you ever have had many dates with boys already.’
She pointed at him with her fingertip to the glass. ‘It’s more about fantasies, and what you imagine a relationship to be I think, a quality Wife School fiance is guaranteed to not have dated any other men before. And your answer now too, mister class one male.’
He looked at her, surprised. ‘Ah, well, I have no clue either, a medjool on May 12th, but then only if it’s with you. Oh and by the way, the next question is… What is your worst flaw?’
‘I’m rebellious and I don’t actually want to be a Wife, among other things. Or you can put that with the question about my biggest qualities that follows it if you like. And you?’
Her natural way of reversing the questions every time to make it more equal made him very irritated with the whole thing, and with the whole Wife School system. ‘Eh, did I mention already that these questions are for me to ask you, but not for you to ask me back, for some reason? Quite asymmetric. Why don’t they want the girl to get to know the boy too? Hmm… you’re right that it’s better that I answer them too to see if I’m pleasing enough to you, or something like that. And if I’m not pleasing to you then you can tell me where I have to improve myself or so. But not through that Greystone dude please.’
She giggled again.
‘So, your biggest flaw, Mister Real Man with the Gamma-1 rating. Or are you afraid of that question?’
‘Me? Mister Real Man? You’re mistaken here… I’m afraid that I’ll never be a Real Man as they like them in this Nation or something like that? Which is quite a disadvantage in the male world, even with that shiny Gamma-1 badge. Although that might not actually be a flaw to you.’
She smiled again. ‘Ah, no, it’s more of a basic requirement. Real Men should be killed on sight, didn’t you say that yourself? But be assured, if you were one I would be busy now experimenting with all the techniques of advanced courtship sabotage. I know the book by heart now, but you probably shouldn’t know about that. No man is supposed to know that such a thing even exists now that I come to think of it.’
Enjoying this book? Seek out the original to ensure the author gets credit.
He pointed at the official again, who was writing numbers in an old book now. ‘Don’t let him know then. But courtship sabotage sounds like fun if you don’t want a partner.’
‘It’s quite risky business, but then again everything is when you have a partner that you don’t want. My biggest flaw now is that I already like you too much for trying out serious courtship sabotage. It’s rather mean stuff, you know.’
‘So you mean that you were actually planning on doing that with me?’
She shrugged shyly. ‘Eh, no. I don’t know. Not really with you. I hoped it wouldn’t be needed after meeting you on that choosing ceremony night. But to be honest, it always was my plan in case any man would be so crazy to choose me. I’ve been practising with girl friends for years. You’re quite lucky to be you now…’
‘So what would happen if you were indeed successful in the sabotage, and I’d bring in my papers with negative ratings, and say to old Mister Stoneface there that I don’t want you?’
He was whispering again when talking about the official, who still didn’t seem to notice anything.
‘Greystone is the name. He’d try to convince you to have one more meeting behind the glass and they would heavily punish me into compliance, to see if I can indeed be made into a good wife. But if you really would refuse me he’d just invite you to a new Ceremony of Partner Choice to pick another girl and that’d be it for you. Girls can be replaced very easily. And I’d get another bad rating, but since we’ve only met through the glass there’d be no real problem yet. That’s why you need to do the courtship sabotage before the first actual meet-up. I’d not yet be damaged goods, you know.’
‘You said that before. What do you mean with that last comment?’ Michael stared at her, horrified.
‘Oh, if you don’t like your product and bring it back it’s a used item, so it’s lower quality from then on. You were quite right about that one earlier on with your speech about responsibility. They will investigate what happened on your dates and from the slightest distrust you’ll get the label ‘probably not a virgin anymore’ on your file. Which means you’ll automatically be a D at best even if you were an A before, and never top-10 again, and it’s told to the boys when they ask for you at the ceremony so they can reconsider.’
Michael couldn’t believe his ears. ‘That is heavily disturbing to say the least. And I certainly still stand by what I said about my responsibility for you then. Unless you don’t want me that is. You always have as much right to end this as I do.’
They looked at each other in an uneasy silence, until Michael looked at the paper again.
‘Okay, and the next question is… What would you change.’
‘Change about what? About me? About the world?’
‘It doesn’t specify. Just “What would you change?”’
‘Oh, Life, the universe and everything then. And I wouldn’t want to be a girl. Alas, I definitely wouldn’t want to be a boy either. And I still like being a human, and being myself, but just not in this world. So it’s complicated. And inconclusive even… And you?’
‘Everything about this place and more. Everything about this country. But not that I’ve chosen you. You’re much more fun than I imagined girls to be.’
She smiled and sighed.
‘And I’m almost falling for your flirting now too. You’re more than just hard to sabotage. Hmm, let’s say that you’re hard to process, but easy to get used to. Next question.’
He smiled. ‘What is the weirdest dream you ever had?’
‘Don’t ask, I never remember my dreams, and I wouldn’t tell if I did, let’s have some privacy too. We don’t even know each other for too long, do we? Next?’
‘What do you want most in a husband?’
‘Phew, they have the audacity to have the boy ask that? Really? After all those years of telling me that it’s only the wishes of the husband that count, and that we have to submit and comply and so on? Well, that he asks me questions like that and then listens and answers them too. And that he listens to my “no” on other things too.’
‘I think I can do that. And I hope it can come from two sides too. And oh, wow, it gets better with the questions: What’s your most feminine quality?’
She looked annoyed. ‘That I have a biologically female body. And a higher voice than you. And due to some cruel joke of either God or mother nature or probably both I’m predestined to be attracted to male humans. Which is basically complete self-destructive madness.’
‘My condolences, my dear Lady Megan. I have the same problem from the other side. Maybe it’s a sign we belong together.’
They both started laughing.
‘I think we’re the worst couple ever, not?’ He said.
‘Maybe, but I’m having fun and I think that at least the friendship part has a chance. But stop looking at that paper that I cannot touch, and go on.’
‘Ta-dah… How important is The Church for you?’
She frowned. ‘No comment. Really. You don’t want to go there.’
‘So, you’re one of them atheists?’
‘Oh no, I don’t know. The Church just creeps me out. I have no problem with God, or with angels or whatever, but John Manfred was no Saint, and I just don’t believe in any of their nonsense. And I don’t think they do either. And in the good stuff they say they have they’re usually pure hypocrites who don’t practice what they preach. It’s only part of the propaganda machine that keeps women enslaved and turns men into the worst possible version of themselves, and nothing else. If there are spiritual truths somewhere out there they surely won’t be found in the Church.’
‘Cynical but fair I’m afraid. And we’re almost at the end. Oh, Oh, the next one: do you agree to comply to the church’s teaching against premarital sex?’
She held up her hand as a sign of surrender.
‘You answer this one, mister man. The girl’s opinion doesn’t matter at all in the real world. You should be smart enough to know that.’
Now it was his turn to blush.
‘Ah… Well… I’m not even sure on this time table that by the time they want us to marry I would actually be ready for anything like sex. And most things I hear and see about it are horrifying anyway, I mean the message of sex ed classes and porn and such. The whole ‘you need a woman to please you’ stuff. It’s just not worth it. But there must be a way in which the word intimacy is not a lie, I’ve read enough black market love stories from outside The Nation. And I’m willing to find out how that works with my Wife. I am not really ready to think about that now though, I need to learn how to be around girls first, and that’s probably going to take enough time already. And I probably need to unlearn a lot of stuff that I have been imprinted with too. All that porn nonsense isn’t about real people, it’s what you’d do if you married a human wifebot with no will or soul and could be as selfish as possible without any consequences. But if I were in that position…’
She had been listening and nodding, and then started laughing with that last word, and then stopped when she saw his serious and shocked face.
‘Oops, that wasn’t meant as an innuendo… Wow, that was so improper of me after all that you were saying. But you get a strange kind of humour after too many please-your-husband lessons.’
‘Whatever. What I wanted to say is that if we are ever an actual couple, your opinion and mine are equal, especially on things like that, not? And whoever says no has always the veto vote. I don’t want to do anything unwanted. I don’t see how any person of honour could enjoy that. It’s better to never have sex than to be predatory and entitled and then abuse your partner. And to be honest, I’m so afraid of falling into that blind spot of Nation culture myself that it might be better to just stay away from it… Can a man ever be a real lover? I really wouldn’t want to hurt you. You deserve better. So I’d rather have a fake cover-up marriage and never even touch you than that. If you know what I mean.’
She didn’t answer, and he couldn’t read her expression.
‘Well, was that pleasing to you, Lady Megan?’
She frowned a bit before she answered. ‘Certainly, Sir Michael. It was a bit unexpected but a welcome surprise to hear this from a man. With a mentality like that you could actually be a good lover, I’m sure of that. But I’m not sure whether I would deserve such a thing.’
She blushed, and paused again for a while. ‘More questions, or is this it?’
‘We’re nearing the end of the list and they’re mostly quite silly from here on. All of this is silly anyway. And what’s up with this stupid glass in between us? Is that really needed?’
‘Ah, they don’t want boys to get too crazy on the first meeting. They can sift out the really bad apples that way. If he is really too disagreeable at the first meeting they can throw him out of so, and then abort the arrangement without having the girl losing their value or something like that. And I suppose that if I had a father who followed me and listened to me I could still object to him and he might stop it if he really didn’t like the boy or had other objections. Which isn’t the case as you know, but still. The father is still the owner until the girl marries so he has some say too.’
He nodded and felt a bit nauseous.
She looked around. ‘I don’t think old Greystone will do something at all no matter what you do. You’re the client, and a higher class man than he is at that, so you will get the girl no matter what, even if you choosing me was rather weird. He knows my father doesn’t care. And sometimes I wonder if that guy is even human. There’s actually a theory among the girls that he is a robot.’
Michael looked at the man. ‘No, too much wrinkles and stuff. No-one could do that so realistically in a robot. Or at least they don’t try. But I see what you mean.’
The official looked in their direction as if he woke from a dream, and seemed to notice that he had filled in most of the questions already, and then looked at his watch.
‘Your time is up, mister Adams. A new date will be arranged for you both to meet, outside with a chaperon. Please find a way to end your conversation now,’ Greystone said in his disinterested mechanical voice.
‘See you next time, Megs. And greet little Lizzie from me.’ He said cheerfully.
‘We call her Eliza now, but I will. She’ll never believe me when I tell her how the conversation went.’ Michael looked at his papers.
‘Oh, and before I forget, it might not be on these papers, but there’s a question you need to answer too, for me personally: Is Michael Adams overall pleasing to you as a potential husband, Lady Anderson?’
‘Eh’
The official interrupted him again before he could get an answer.
‘Time’s up lad. Time to leave. You’ll see her soon again if you fill in the papers.’
He left without getting an actual answer in words, but her smile told him enough. They certainly would be able to conspire against the system as friends, with or without marriage. And his future would be better with her in it.