As the 'cleaning up' by the servant began, Gin had been instructed by his Master to do some cleaning up of his own, thus found himself in his room. Gin thought he had done his best to look and act normal when he bid Spear and Il San goodnight while quickening his escape from their company.
After having done as required, he ended up sitting on his bed staring at a wall senselessly. Simply... feeling and sensing nothing. His earlier chaotic thoughts were nowhere in sight for his overactive brain to pick and poke at.
Instead of the unease and unrest that he thought would come over him, he felt that his mind was clear. But this didn't make sense to him. Was this a normal reaction to seeing death, no, seeing someone killed before one's very eyes for the first time? Death, itself, wasn't something new. He had been to his fair share of burial ceremonies to know how a dead body looked like. How death should, in his cocooned vision, look like.
Maybe the small talk he had with himself was good enough to settle any more troubles for his mental state? Maybe the war tales and journals he had read helped in this curious situation? But, how likely was that?
Some of the heroes written had longer-lasting effects from such scenes, and he had thought he too would have been the same. He had deeply empathized with them. Even when the very rare cases of murder had happened in his little town or the cities, he had been certain he wouldn't have been able to handle the situation any better if he had been involved in them. Well, with his current situation, he had been distraught, but that was until he decided he didn't want to feel that way.
Rummaging through his brain, Gin also thought of other tales, of heroes that took longer to process situations that he had just experienced. However, most of those heroes had turned to be or had been takers of life themselves. Maybe that was why? Maybe that was the difference? He hadn't taken the servant's, the spy's, life with his own hands? No, he was an accomplice whichever way he looked at it. These were peaceful times, and life was never to be taken so lightly in Yerek…
Immediately as that last thought bloomed into existence, Gin stomped it down. He was failing again. He had failed by doing the same thing he said he shouldn't. He had made conclusions to something he didn't know or even begin to understand. Although he still didn't get it, it didn't change the fact that he felt no burden from what he saw. Were those stories just full of air? No, that was unlikely.
His scholarly endeavors did teach him that Art and Life tend to imitate each other far too much. He just needed to make it clear to himself that he wasn't in a tale being woven; he was here. With people who live on the side of life he never thought he would get in contact with. He was here.
Gin turned his head downwards to stare at his hands. He was leaning on his bed’s headboard with the bottom half of his body covered in linen sheets. His rough hands laid palms up on his lap as he clenched and unclenched them. Sighing, he turned his head to the study table at the end of his bed. The neat pile of scrolls and bound books given to him by the Master were still there. His books from his travel case had been arranged there as well.
An assigned servant Spear had introduced to him, a frail-looking lass, was the only individual that had gotten to touch the reading materials ever since his second day in the Distant Jade had ended. They cleaned up his room and also helped him arrange his clothes into a neat pile every day. He had always intended to give the servant his thanks, but he never found the time to.
Servants… Gin's mind slowly reverted to his earlier musing. However, before he could get anywhere near that obscure topic, two sharp knocks came from his door, startling him. Seeming not to want to wait for a response, the person outside opened the door and entered.
Spear, looking shrew as ever, invited himself into Gin's room. Noticeably, he had changed into a loose and ungirdled robe, his usual headscarf was nowhere in sight as his plaited hair crowned his head. Gin wondered then how much time had passed. He should have gotten whatever sleep he could have. But this realization was false. Sleep hadn't come to him yet...
Ignoring the room owner's unresponsive state and without further ado, Spear informed Gin in an uninterested tone that he was there to check up on him. Hearing this, Gin got back to motion and found his heart warmed considerably by the gesture and felt grateful for it. He also found that he didn't mind Spear's otherwise rude entrance or clipped tone. Consequently, not feeling the need to hold back, Gin shared his candid thoughts on what had happened.
Spear, rather unceremoniously, told him, "Get used to it. It may be easy-going, fun, and games at times, but what is underneath all that is a mess. Master shouldn't have brought you to this world, true, but here you are. Death will be fleeting at some point. It will not be easy, but you still need to prepare yourself for that inevitability..."
"I see..." Gin muttered. He saw Spear’s point and for a moment he couldn’t understand how death would be fleeting to him, but the use of the term ‘world’ brought things to a better perspective than his own word choice of ‘another side of life’. Though glossed over by the amazing display the Divine Art provides, death was a twin attached to the Art at the hip in most cases. It was easily brushed off when people talk of the fantastical nature of what Divine Art Users could do. And the matter itself was seen as otherworldly. It has nothing to do with the ordinary folks of Yerek. Much less that of a farm boy.
Even if the people involved in a new scandal be it with the five or other rumors, the deaths that occurred weren’t key in any shape or form. This thought scared Gin. How many times had he and Agi ignored the mortality of these people? Some were bad people, yes, but surely not all. Was this normal? Does the distance from such situations easily create such dissonance? These questions, however, did nothing to answer Gin’s worry about his mental state. Just like he had done previously, the fear he felt about the lack of awareness of the deaths that occurred by the Art, was damned without delay when he looked past it.
What remained was the unnerving feeling created by the swift shift of his mental state. Why? Gin asked himself, and Spear, "Um… is it normal to get over the shock from witnessing such events for the first time so… quickly?"
Gin had asked the question with a look that made Spear think he was constipated, but this, in turn, made him inquire back with confusion, "What?"
"It's the first time I've seen a human being killed before me, but other than the initial shock, right now, I don't feel anything else. I had expected something to overcome me and all, but... No… Is that normal?"
Spear narrowed his eyes, "Well, there can be various reasons for that... If you have forgotten it, this either means that you didn’t register those emotions, or it caused enough damage for your mind to keep it in the darkest, dustiest corner of your mind, never to be seen again.
"Although, based on your concerns… Hmm, it should be the former. Maybe the matter held little significance? Maybe you acquired a decent hold on reason for it not to be as significant? This event did create a shock, believe you me, but besides this, we can get an answer to this by pointing to your adaptability.
“You have very high adaptability, and this can assist you in your current… hmm, I’ll say predicament with the Master, as well as every other aspect of life, well, and death. Yes... this in itself is good," Spear nodded his head and looked over at Gin. He didn't offer anything else as he straightened his sitting posture on Gin's bed—which he had invited himself to sit on—and crossed his arms.
Having heard all things said, Gin lost himself in thought. The words Spear uttered turned around in his mind and he thought something was strange. If it was good, did that mean his reaction was alright? Different, but alright? Squinting his eyes, Gin focused the topic on another issue, did what Spear observe mean that it would be advantageous for their Master's plans?
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Rather, did it mean he had the potential to be a good killer? Gin furrowed his whole face at the thought. Was this a good quality for the Master's revenge...? When the last question rooted itself in his mind, this finally did too: 'Wait, did Master's revenge entail me taking a life?' Feeling a cold creeping up his spine, Gin got the rising urge to make things crystal clear.
°°
"What could possibly be 'good'?" Gin asked Spear, who had been inspecting his room critically.
Frowning slightly, Spear gave a sideways glance at Gin, "Why wouldn't it be good? High adaptability means that when things overwhelm you, you can be effective, even by a small margin, in whatever situation. And, to clarify for your lost self, the remark was more towards you being able to question the strangeness of your mental state. Yet, if you hadn't..."
Gin gulped when he felt the air between Spear and him stiffen considerably, "W-what?"
"I would have had to kill you, of course. It would mean that you had the greatest potential to endanger not only us but others as well. Your self-regulation will be put in question as you continue on this new path. And, of course, being given the lessons in Divinity could trigger a disaster due to all the power you will wield."
Mouth hanging open, Gin felt that he was thoroughly wronged, thoroughly! "You think I would go on a killing spree?! What in the world goes on in that head of yours! If anything, I should be the one worried and ready for any nonsense you and yours would pull!"
“Hah! My, of course, you should be. Self-preservation is key after all,” Spear smirked
“Say that when you are not the reason why the Royal family is taking time out of their busy schedule to spy on me!” Gin fumed.
Scoffing, Spear responded with a righteous tone, “I think you may be underestimating yourself a tad much. We had nothing to do with the Royals spying on you. This is all on you. Who told you not to deny the Master’s will?”
Gritting his teeth, Gin wondered again why he shouldn’t just escape. This experience was more than enough to give him the wake-up call he needed as an excuse! A rebellion of his own should be in order! “Well, then let me take all the blame then! I’ll take responsibility for the death of that servant, no! spy too!”
“Haha! As if you could have even touched the hem of that traitor’s clothes,” Spear cackled in delightful ridicule.
And just like that, a battle of words was triggered and the bickering between the two intensified. From shouting to hissing viciously, the students tired themselves out like so. While huffing and puffing, Gin and Spear sat face to face and stabbed each other with their gazes. Each trying to best the other.
"Anyway!"Gin said, having given up on the silent dual. He could see Spear lift his chin arrogantly while snorting with a smirk that smeared his smug face. Ignoring the reactions of his counterpart, Gin gritted his teeth as he asked about the Master's revenge and if it has any correlation to killing. In the same breath, he also inquired on whether the servants of the Distant Jade all learned the Divine Art.
"Well, for your first question, I really don't care." A 'hey' from Gin tackled Spear's words, but Spear went on without pausing, "As for your last question, there are only two servants that have and are learning the Divine Art in the Distant Jade. One is the little eel that Flame has put in, she’s the one in charge of cleaning your room, by the way. And the other is my second hand that you saw cleaning out that rubbish."
Huh? Oh! Gin was intrigued by the answer. To think that he had been close to one of Flame's sect members. In fact, how did Spear come to accept such a variable in the Distant Jade? How curious. However, aside from this… speaking of the 'rubbish', a worry that he hadn't thought of rose in Gin's mind.
"Uh… the 'rubbish' you are speaking of… he was the King's, maybe I should say, the Royals' spy, yes? Wouldn't that mean trouble since you killed him?" Gin felt his worry turning to panic at the terrible outcome when the news about the spy's death was discovered.
Contrary to Gin's reaction, Spear only scoffed, "Please, the King's people die every day."
Hearing this, Gin clutched at his head. Yes, a headache was beginning its assault. "I think the two points are completely different."
"Is that so? Hmm, very strange, to me, they seem to be the same," Spear shrugged and waved his hand nonchalantly.
"Spear…" Gin warned. He had to wonder if the reason he didn't feel anything much about death and killing actually morphed from this person...
Sighing, Spear gave Gin a serious look, "Truly, Gin, the King's people die every day."
Frowning, Gin took in Spear's words as they were. The words were true, annoying, but true. The King's people did die every day. Bad health, accidents, murder, wrong place at the wrong time, etc. Recalling what the spy had said himself, his chances of survival had been zero. That wasn't a mistake, it had been a simple fact. How many didn’t know that you never left unscathed when messing with the Distant Jade? Wasn’t this too a fact?
There was no way individuals of Il San and Spear’s background would have taken the matter of being spied on lightly; Royal spy or not. Also, who would have known that Spear had, allegedly, killed the spy? For all anyone knew, the spy could have fallen ill or had an unfortunate accident and passed away. He also had no family to speak of… As Gin thought more about it, it just became exceedingly terrible.
"He didn't have a family… Oh, wait, what about the other servants?" Gin inquired. They must have been shocked.
With a shake of his head, Spear spoke, "You don't have to worry about that. Though they don't have the Divinity, each of them is specialized in the Fighting Arts. And trust me, most of them have seen their fair share of what unkindness can do. Even that spy."
"Oh… I see. I, well, that's a positive of its own. Sad but, better than being unprepared," Gin mumbled.
"Yes, far better," Spear concurred.
The two sat in grim silence. Gin interlaced his fingers and stared at them for a while. The silence was broken when he broached another topic.
"What does Master say about all this?"
Seeming not to think about it much, spear only gave a noncommittal grunt. This made Gin raise an eyebrow.
"You haven’t talked to him about this?" Gin highly doubted it. Even though Il San would sprinkle more hate on Spear for such an event, he must want to discuss or get a full briefing on the issue. The Distant Jade was his after all.
Mumbling something inaudible, Spear moved his gaze around Gin's room. It was as if he was avoiding the matter. No, he was avoiding it!
"Ha! You haven't gone to talk to Master yet, have you? I bet after everything, you just ran with your tail tucked neatly between your legs. What? Scared Master will have you running ten thousand laps around the field?" Gin cackled with pure evil energy.
It was almost imperceptible, but Spear flinched slightly.
Victory! Gin puffed up his chest.
"What are you even worried about, brother mine? If anything-"
"Oh shut it, you little thief!" Spear countered.
"Well, you can go to the Hells of the Underworld with that accusation! I paid my dues already!"
"If that's what keeps you sleeping soundly at night, then by all means! I was going to talk to Master right after I checked up on you, you sorry sack!" Spear tutted as he shook his head.
Snorting, Gin scooted to one side of the bed where the wall was, leaned on it, and crossed his legs at his ankles. "So, when did you notice that he was a spy?" He was glad to have changed the topic, though still heavy, it was easier than death. And, it was something that should bite Spear where it hurts, and he could figure out if his guesses were correct.
"Humph! Sadly, it was when he decided to make you his business. The time he talked to you at the gardens was the giveaway. How troublesome! By then I decided to have Flame's subordinate be your maid and guard, just in case, you understand? My second hand, by the way, helps with knowing who is doing what and where then reporting to me-"
"What?! I had a guard?! So, it's not super hearing or super eyesight?! Master had said Divine Art users in Martial Arts get heightened senses, so I thought the Divine Art was all about superhuman everything. I mean why else would you guys make it sound so awesome and mysterious?" Gin babbled as he slapped the feathered mattress— which he loved to pieces compared to the cheap straw mattress back at the farm.
Spear massaged his temples, "Unbelievable... What exactly is Master teaching you?"
Not wasting a second, Gin listed out, "Stances, body conditioning, meditation, lifting weights, more stances, and did I mention stances?"
Spear's frown, which hadn't left his brow for a while now, deepened, "What about the Divine Art?"
"Hmm, he had given me some scrolls to read on its history," Gin pointed to the study table at the foot of his bed. The scrolls and bound books were neatly stacked on each other.
Massaging his temples even harder, Spear continued his questioning, "And, you haven't read them?"
"How can I?" Gin tilted his head innocently, "Master is having me exercise like there is no tomorrow, so when can I get the time to study them?"
"Here you are wanting to be a small scholar, eh?" Spear grinned in contempt.
"Why, yes. Now, if only I could convince him to give me enough time to work on those scrolls," Gin said through gritted teeth.
"True, it is a bit weird... Fine, listen up. Divine Art has a University-"
Gin interrupted him with a 'this I know' and Spear was ready to thrash him. Wisely deciding to keep quiet, Gin listened attentively.
"The University has three sects, but they are commonly known as Schools to keep up with the 'University' title, you see. These Schools are: School of Thought, School of Martial Arts, and School of Crafts."