After sharing a meal with Hickory, I decided I needed to find something to fight. Not hunt. I need something that can fight back and push me. I am much too weak to fight those shades I saw in a dream a while ago. Right now as I am, it might not even take them seconds to kill me. I need to work on my mana control, and how much I have. I am not sure what it would be like to get more, but when I was out there away from the elements, I did not have much. I bid Hickory a good night, as I took to the air.

Once I was in the air, I took in a deep breath letting myself open up to my surroundings. Taking longer measured breaths I let my surroundings flow through me. I could feel the chill clinging to my body. With each breath the frost on my body grew. It felt refreshing. It wasn't as nice as the lake was in restoring my energy, but if I can do this all the time, I can constantly keep control over my mana.

The air was nice, the feeling of it rushing over my scales, allowed me to relax. I felt free from all I had been worried about. I could feel my spirits lift. I can go wherever I want, as long as I am on this planet, I think. I have been wanting to test to see if I could escape from here. I could see which direction I should go in.

Looking up higher into the sky, the split was very sudden, half the night sky was dark and empty. The dark side would lead to the void. Its pull was nullified by the planet, but out of its atmosphere it would take hold. The direction which might be safest to attempt my fate would be toward the sky covered in stars. It's so dazzling, and promising. A sky full of jewels and dreams.

“If only I could leave, I do feel more grown up than I was when I left. I wonder if I would want to continue adventuring when I leave.” I wondered as I flew in the direction of the starry night sky.

I wanted to try my luck. I want to see if it's possible for me to escape. I kept focused on my breathing while I flew. Allowing the mana to flow through me. If I focused hard I could feel it. Looking at the sky, I made up my mind. I was going to escape and I am trying tonight.

Flying till all I saw was the starry sky, I turned to face it. Summoning up all my courage, I surged forward with all my strength. Without relenting I just try as hard as I can, my wings flapping as hard as I can. I wanted to be free of this place. I had never been as aware of my body as I have remembered ever being. I was exiting the planet and still no pull yet, was I going to be able to escape its pull? Was I going to be free?

No, as soon as I exited the planet the horrible feeling returned. I felt like I was gripped by my soul, and pulled on it. I gasped as the horrible feeling of its claws sinking deep within me and pulling on something not physical racked my body and pulled me, not to a stop, I was immediately pulled in the other direction. This horrible feeling, like death was approaching, my body trembled and no matter how hard I tried flying I was being dragged through space by the void. Its hunger and power was so overwhelming, it was too much.

I barely managed to flap and claw my way back into the safety of the planet, with not much time to spare. If I was any slower or weaker, I would have been pulled too far away from the planet. Even getting back in control of myself and feeling its grip disappear, my body didn't stop trembling. The panic and fear ran rampant and wild through my body and mind. My breaths were deep and I rushed to solid ground. ‘Danger’ was all my mind could think of. I felt like I was going to die. I very much could have.

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I roughly landed on the ground, I had no idea where I was, but I wasn't even thinking of where I was. I could barely stand on my legs, as they trembled and my panicked breaths made it harder to focus. My lungs were screaming for more air. I immediately lost all control and was trying with all my might to get back. After I had settled onto the ground and slowly caught my breath, I could feel all the effort I put on my wings trying to fight back against the pull, my wings started aching, crying out for a rest as I let the droop to the ground limp. I thought the ground was moving still but realized it was how much my body was trembling.

Slowly where I stood slowly came into focus. I was in what looked like a waste land. It was hot, and dry here. It was just as the sun was setting. All I could see was rocks and sand in any direction. I also noticed that when I had stopped trembling the ground underneath me had started trembling. I quickly looked around for the source of the disturbance, but I couldn't see anything. There was nothing running toward me.

Then something within me shouted to move, and that I was in danger. Without thinking I forced my wings and legs to take air once more and lift off the ground. Not any sooner had I left the ground the sand started falling into a large sinkhole where I had stood, opening a large hole in the ground. My tired body protesting me pushing it any further I try to find solid rock which I can land on and rest. I was not trusting the sand.

I found a large rock which I promptly landed on. My body having given its last energy in escaping the sinkhole I didn't have the energy to stand and immediately fell flat onto the rock wings spread out. My body crumpled into a heap on this rock. I had nothing to resist the pull of sleep. I slowly sank into its arms awaiting me.

I found myself in such a familiar place, the abyss. I didn't fight it this time. I let myself drift, leaving myself to the whim of the abyss.

“What is my purpose for living? I am stuck on the awful planet, with no escape. I was trapped. Would I live all my life alone?” I couldn't help it anymore, I started crying and curled up.

The feeling of hopelessness was overwhelming. All I wanted was a fun adventure, and here I am trapped on the edge of death. What is this all supposed to be? Did the elements know this was going to happen? The thoughts, I had so many rushing through my mind. That's when the image of my mother appeared.

“You are my child, you are too strong to die. All of creation may one day feel like it's crushing down on you, but you are too strong to give up! Just because you fought and you didn't win, does not mean you have lost the fight! You only lose when you don't get back up and fight again!” She said.

“I don't know mom, this seemed really impossible for me. I may be capable, but I can't beat the void.” I pleaded, hoping for an answer.

“Who says you need to fight it alone?” She replied with a smile before vanishing from my thoughts.

I wanted to reply but the image was gone. Was that me, the abyss, or something else? I didn't have answers, but I still don't know what to do. There is no other dragon here. It's helpless. Maybe I can try again with the humans, it’s all I have left.