Chapter 6 - Demiurge

“I… I don’t know. One day, I think I decided to change. I wanted something new. Something more. Something life-like, I think. I honestly can’t remember. But on the other hand, I truly don’t know why he did it despite his distaste for… human emotions, as you put it,” Demiurge softly whispers, his face still gazing down as if he is afraid to look up at the person who had suffered all because of him.

“I… see,” Lucifer pauses for a brief moment, digesting Demiurge’s answers before continuing, “Okay, tell me this then. I’ll ask you some simple questions and you’ll have to answer them sincerely. Do this, and then I may trust you.” He determinedly says while he stares at the vulnerable form of Demiurge, deciding to probe him. To test his worthiness. To test his truth. To find out why he became like this.

Lucifer has always been the special one in the family, whether in a drinking contest or being the greatest of the angels, mastery over the biggest and smallest of skill sets. He always had a knack for being the gifted one and using his talents to make his family laugh and smile with affection. One of his party ‘tricks’ was the ability to discern the truth from the lies, even when it came to his emotionless Father, despite all their unique abilities to mask each others’ omniscience.

“Really?” Demiurge asks slowly with his voice emitted in a soft tone, his body racking with slight hope and eagerness to prove his trustfulness. He raises his head, while the air surrounding them abruptly stills as if time had stopped to listen for his next inquiry.

Sensing his eagerness, Lucifer’s gaze softens for a moment as he’s reminded of the genuine pain in Demiurge’s voice, but he quickly masks it with a nod. “Yes,” Lucifer simply replies.

The answer immediately fills Demiurge’s body with unshackled joy, causing him to tremble in anticipation as if his material form cannot contain his excitement. He knows this is his one chance to form a new bond with Lucifer and make amends. To show that he isn’t the monster that he once was. To prove that he doesn’t deserve the justified hatred that should be thrown his way. To make the strange sting in his heart disappear whenever Lucifer comes to mind. He thinks to himself under his quivering appearance, unaware of how his eager body language rapidly morphs into one of desperation as his thoughts grow into a spiraling abyss.

“Ask away then!” Demiurge hurriedly agrees, staring into Lucifer’s eyes with intensity, albeit tinged with a hint of desperation rather than cheerfulness.

Noticing his father's impatience, Lucifer steadily obliges and simply asks, one mundane word filled with gravity escaping his lips, “Why?”

Demiurge waits for the follow-up, elaborating further on his ‘simple’ question, but he’s met only with his son’s unflinching stare. “Wait, that’s it? That’s so vague! How am I supposed to answer that?” he can’t resist playfully grumbling, his lively demeanor gradually resurfacing. A smile slowly adorns his face once more as the answers naturally come to him. “Fine, whatever! If I had to summarize why I want to help you, well… then I would say; it’s simply because…”

He wanted to repay him. To repay the debt, the debt of the promise he had long kept since his dawn. Lucifer had helped him in his time of need, even if he didn’t realize it. With only fragments of memories he had, he happily cherishes the moments they had during the confusion of his hazy creation, even if they were scant few because to him, Lucifer… is special. Lucifer was the one with that smile he always thinks about, the smile he couldn’t get out of his head, the smile that stuck with him.

The ever-bright smile of confidence, filled with unconditional faith that always saw the best in everyone despite their circumstances or nature, gradually shaped who he is today. But every time he is reminded of that smile, his heart bitterly strings with sudden emptiness that he cannot fathom why. He stares at Lucifer as if to seek his answers, only to glimpse at the painful contrast between his current and his past self. Nevertheless, he must repay his debt as a thank you for everything he has done for him. Thus, no matter what, he’s determined to bring back that blooming smile by the end of today.

“It’s simply because… I love you/need you/care for you/miss you/am your father, dummy,” he seemingly says in an incomprehensible jumble, his words tumbling out like an ancient language that mere mortals can’t comprehend. But Lucifer understands it all too well. “I’m your family. It’s what we do,” Demiurge continues, leaning closer to Lucifer’s motionless face, his own face illuminated with anticipation in contrast as if the pure, unadulterated delight could alone communicate the sincerity of his intentions.

In turn, his son stares into his deep purple eyes, noting every tiny movement, searching for any sign of deceit. But he’s met with nothing but Demiurge’s unguarded willingness to be examined. “... Right,” Lucifer scoffs, skepticism lacing his voice, clearly recognizing the underlying irony of his father’s statement. But since clear glass is still clear glass no matter the angle a person is looking at it, he reluctantly admits to himself that Demiurge is telling the truth. A part of him even smiles at his father’s words, indicating the lack of bite in his tone.

Then, Demiurge suddenly holds Lucifer’s face with delicate care, his fingers gently tracing across the subtle weight of pain etched into his son’s features. He sees the sadness accumulated over countless years, hidden behind his smile, the emotions weighing down and distorting what was once pure. But this is enough for him. The smile is good enough.

Of course, his son initially flinches at the sudden touch, recoiling slightly from the unfamiliar contact. His eyes widen slightly in surprise, and his jaw tightens. But instead of pulling away, he slightly leans into his father’s gentle palms almost subconsciously, finding comfort amidst everything. “I hate you,” Lucifer murmurs, his tone carrying a surprising gentleness.

Demiurge flinches at his sudden words, causing him to pause. Expecting another harsh comment, he braces himself, but instead, Lucifer continues in his typical monotone voice, playfully saying, “I hate how you make me feel this way.” Then, he smirks slightly, albeit his eyes subtly flashing with conflicting emotions.

Demiurge stiffens in surprise as he notices the visible, albeit small, grin. Then, finally realizing the gentleness in his comment, he unfreezes and slowly melts into Lucifer’s body, his hand caressing his face with tender care. “Oh. But you like it~,” Demiurge responds teasingly, his deep purple eyes sparkling.

A moment of contemplative silence passes before Lucifer quietly admits, “Never said I didn’t.” His gaze of doubt finally softens, and the corners of his lips twitch as if he’s fighting back a growing smile.

A grin spreads across Demiurge's lips even further, satisfaction gleaming in his eyes. “You’re such a tease, hmph,” he playfully hums, a mixture of fondness and exasperation in his tone. Then, he caresses Lucifer’s face almost affectionately, lingering a bit longer for each stroke, but there’s still a boundary between each one as if he’s scared to push his luck any further. Yet, he enjoys the short, silent respite, his petite body relaxing visibly.

“Yes, I am quite the charmer, I know,” Lucifer smirks as he leans further into his touch, making his father playfully scoff with annoyance. Then, he smiles once more as they sit in companionable silence.

A quiet interval of happiness passes before Demiurge voices a question he’s been wanting to ask, “So, does this mean you trust me now?” His voice carries a hint of a tremor, though overshadowed by the sheer radiance of excitement exuded from his quivering body.

Lucifer raises his brows mockingly, a playful glint in his eyes. “Never said that either.” He tilts his head downward, watching his father’s reaction with amusement and affection.

“W-wha?! Wait! That’s not fair!” Demiurge stammers in shock, his hands tightening their grip in surprise, “You meanie!” His cheeks puff out in a childish pout.

“Why are you in such a rush? I’m barely on my first question,” Lucifer teases, his smirk growing ever wider across his face, ignoring the flattery compliment about himself.

“Y-you…!” Demiurge angrily pinches both sides of his cheeks, his brow furrowing in mock annoyance.

“Ow. Alright, fine, fine. Although you might not be my first choice as to which family I’d like to see again, I appreciate that you’re here, I suppose,” Lucifer begrudgingly concedes in a roundabout way, his wide shoulders relaxing as he lets out a small, resigned chuckle. Although, a subtle smile does tug at his lips. “Speaking of those bastards, where are Gabriel and the others? I’m honestly surprised they’re not here. How’s our family?”

“Oh, yeah. They’re managing, I think. I’d tried reaching out to them once, you know, to see how they’re faring…,” Demiurge softly elaborates, his cheerfulness abruptly dimming at the mention of their family. “But they kept avoiding me. I think they’re still afraid.”

“Not surprised,” Lucifer ruffles his father’s dazzling hair.

“I…,” Demiurge flinches at the comment and deeply sighs, “Yeah… I guess.”

“C’mon, I’m just playing with you. I find no twisted pleasure to see you in such a saddened state. Even though I should,” Lucifer jokes, noticing his father’s hands loosen their grip slightly.

“Hahaha, no no no, I’m not sad. I’m just… uh…,” Demiurge struggles for words, his small laughter trailing off with a wry smile. Flashes of memories of their encounter pop into his mind. “It’s just uh… it hurts to see them so scared, and I understand why. I’m justified in being hated.”

“Oh.” Lucifer suddenly lets go. That wasn’t a lie. And Lucifer doesn’t like that. He doesn’t like the way Demiurge talked about himself at all. Something about that irks him. He doesn’t like it. Not. One. Bit. His eyes narrow, and a flicker of protectiveness inexplicably crosses his face.

Demiurge continues, “But, I feel so helpless about it. I can’t even be there for them or provide support. I can’t help them, even though I really, really want to. I just uh… I just wish things had gone down differently.” His voice gradually wavers, his tone uncharacteristically soft, while his shoulders slump slightly as if the weight of regret is too heavy for him.

Then, a sudden silence hangs over them, the stale air of hell stilled in the wake of his statement.

“I see.” A moment of deep contemplation passes before Lucifer finally asks, “But Is that all you want?”

“What?” Demiurge blinks, looking up in confusion.

“Is that all you want?” Simply wanting to help them despite their hatred for you? I didn’t hear a single word about your desire to be happy alongside them, just wishing the best for them. He wished he said, but, instead, he continues with, “Simply to help them and maybe change their opinion about you?”

“What—no!” Demiurge’s sapphire eyes widen, a mix of indignation and surprise on his face. “Where is this coming from–”

“So you’re altruistic then,” Lucifer states matter-of-factly, cutting him off, the playful tension gradually morphing into something more serious.

His father hesitates briefly, his eyes darting around as if to search for a different answer, his lips parting but no words coming out.

“Uh… Yeah, of course…,” Demiurge lies, unable to acknowledge himself as being that benevolent. He doesn’t believe it. He’s selfish. “B-but why do you suddenly ask?” His voice lacks conviction and his eyes look away.

That was a lie.

Lucifer watches him, a solemn understanding settling over his features. “Nothing much,” he replies calmly, gently grabbing his father’s slim wrists, “Simply inquiring.”

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Lucifer despises liars, especially those who lie to themselves. And for some asinine reason he’s far too familiar with, they cling to the ridiculous lie that they don’t have the merit to be loved. And Demiurge… Demiurge is one of them.

“Umm… Well, okay!” Demiurge reluctantly accepts the explanation, allowing his son to hold his arms with almost naive cheerfulness as if he hadn’t been moping a few moments ago.

I… see it now. I understand. Demiurge is fundamentally flawed. His sole purpose might only be a service to others. But never himself, he lives for others, yet only to be rewarded with the isolation of their spite. And he’s simply, truly okay with that. A flicker of comprehension passes Lucifer’s cold eyes, an empathy masked by his typically stoic expression.

“Now give me your hands,” Lucifer requests, his hands reaching for Demiurge’s own. “And unlock the chains around my omnipotence. Set me free once more.” At his statement, his deep, black eyes glint with a fiery flame of resolve as if the growing amber of determination can seamlessly manifest in reality through sheer willpower alone.

Yet there’s a small, itsy-bitsy problem with that, I’m not. I’m not ‘okay’ with that for obvious reasons. One of them is because I wouldn’t DARE wish the loneliness I… had experienced on anyone else, not even if Demiurge is deserving of the contempt that comes his way. My father doesn’t deserve the isolation or self-loathing.

“Wh-what? Really? I mean, yeah. That was the whole plan, originally,” Demiurge excitedly agrees, albeit confusedly. Rightfully so. His excitement is tinged with hesitation, eyebrows furrowed as he tries to comprehend the sudden shift, but he brushes it off for now.

So, that wouldn’t do. Thus, Lucifer vows to fix his father's problematic personality once he’s free. No matter what it takes. He nods to himself.

After all, he wouldn’t want another mirror image of his younger self, now would he? It already troubled his family enough, he wouldn’t ask for a repeat. “Heh,” he suddenly chuckles at his own humor, a flicker of irony reflecting in his eyes at the eerie similarity in their personality, reminding him of ‘someone’ he used to know. The way he bounces back from depression does remind him of who he was. Now, he understands why his family would call it uncanny, fully observing it for the first time.

Mistaken by his son’s laughter for him making fun of his constant stuttering, Demiurge playfully huffs, albeit with a soft smile, appreciating the gradual happiness from Lucifer that re-emerges again. Yet, a small pout still forms on his lips in response to the sudden change. But for now, he doesn’t question it as he proceeds with his meticulous task.

Then, with his fingers interlocking with his son’s, he summons forth the commandment that forces Lucifer into indefinite stasis. His imprisonment. The insignificant lines of text separate him from being locked out of creation to being a true god once more. With almost perfect precision, he scans them and begins to set his son free from hell, erasing rows upon rows of text, the foundational rules for Lucifer’s incarceration. He hums in contentment as he does so, time slowly passing around them at an unhurried pace as if to prolong this moment between them a little longer.

Demiurge’s head sways side to side in quiet happiness, a cute contrast from his usual exuberance. There is still a pang of sadness that tugs at his chest from the earlier conversation about their family, but he brushes it off for now, refocusing on the ancient symbols and letters floating across Lucifer’s body in a circle. He continues to erase them, while his son sits in silence with his thoughts. Halfway through the process, a curious question slowly emerges from his mind, the one from earlier, which causes him to ask Lucifer. “So… uh, do you trust me now? And what was that all about?” He looks up, causing Lucifer to break his trance and stare down at him.

Lucifer doesn’t reply immediately, raising his brows in contemplation. He takes a moment, a short period of silence inslewing, before his lips eventually part. “Altruism… An altruistic person is selflessly concerned for the well-being of others, even if it means being hated or misunderstood,” he responds in an even tone, opting to ignore the question. “I’ve met my fair share of them while being stuck here for eternity.”

“What…?” Demiurge blinks in confusion.

“The one common trait among them I've seen through my experience is their absence of desire for self-care.”

Oh. Oh no.

“The second common factor is the cruel idea that they aren’t deserving of such luxury.” He gradually leans down, looming his tall, imposing frame over his father’s delicate body, creating a shadow in his wake.

Demiurge might know where he’s going with this, and he, in fact, does not like it.

“And you, however, are the worst case I’ve witnessed out of all of them.”

Lucifer proclaims distinctly.

The blunt statement rings in the air, the words of exasperation and amusement echoing in the surroundings, the tense silence quickly following suit. Demiurge stands in there in utter shock, unable to form any coherent sentences, refutes, deflections, or even lies. He even feels himself shrink inward at the remark.

He wants to deny it, yet he can’t. So, he decides to remain quiet for now, opting to ignore his comments in return. His gaze quickly falls back down on the lines of texts as he deletes them again, grimly looking away from Lucifer. But, he suddenly feels a hand atop his head, the gentle warmth seeping through his hair, as he blinks rapidly.

“In any case, I can’t say if trusting you is a wise choice or not. I can’t say. But I do love you, and that’s… enough for me,” Lucifer answers his earlier question while he ruffles the gremlin’s glowing hair tenderly, causing Demiurge to cease his blinking in surprise.

Then almost hesitantly, he slowly nudges into his touch, acknowledging his heart-wrenching claim about himself, as tears slowly cloud his vision. Then, through it all, he finally manages to get rid of the last line of text imprisoning Lucifer, his arms shaking from exertion. He holds Lucifer's pair of hands tightly, affectionately clutching them for support. Then he finally admits.

“Lucifer… I’m not that great. I’m a horrible, cruel person. I… I don’t think I’m as altruistic as you might initially think, but thank you… Thank you so, so much,” Demiurge gently nuzzles into Lucifer’s chest, holding his hands and rubbing the other one with his head.

Wait a minute. 1, 2, 3… He counts at amount of hands laid across his body that are caressing him affectionately. He looks down and then up, finally noticing Lucifer’s smirk and the floating hand atop his hair. Looking closer, Demiurge quickly spots an empty eyesocket on his face. His son has used his left eye as a material component to conjure a hand to comfort him. His heart skips a beat, and Lucifer simply smiles, his eye slots curving upwards in joy.

“But you see, that’s where you’re wrong. You’ve got the worst case of altruism I’ve seen so far,” he refutes. Then suddenly, feeling the comforting sensation and total control resonate within his body, he slightly shivers as his original power slowly manifests. “Ah, that’s better.” But, he quickly recomposes himself before he continues, “You do tend to berate yourself over the actions and atrocities you did in the past that haunt you. Yet, from what I believe, from what I gathered, you’re entirely different from that cruel entity who committed those heinous crimes, practically a new person. You said it yourself, no?”

Tears filling his eyes, Demiurge stares at him in a small hint of awe and amazement before shaking his head and tenderly whispering, “Yeah… but that was still me. I still have the memories, I still recalled the images of your betrayed face when I locked you away. I don’t deserve forgiveness. At least, I, myself, don’t think so.”

“It’s okay. I won’t either… it’s still too early to forgive you.” Demiurge flinches at the remark as Lucifer continues to speak. “But I love you, and that’s more than enough. So, begin loving yourself… because I do. I believe the current you, are not him. Certainly not,” Lucifer confirms with unbridled confidence, patting his small father in reassurance.

“But but–”

“Alright then, answer me this; do you remember everything He did? And, if given the choice and circumstance, would you do it again and continue even right now?” Lucifer interrupts, causing him to pause and rethink.

“No! No… I wouldn’t,” Demiurge meekly replies with a subtle smile, his voice is still honest but soft, while his eyes are still watery. “And, surprisingly, I don’t remember that much.”

Then, Lucifer strokes back his star-filled hair and reveals more of his face, observing closely for any sign of deceit. His small, feminine features, from his heart-shaped face to his soft, slightly upturned lips, conveyed a gentle soul and a tender vulnerability. He didn’t lie.

“And that’s good enough for me,” Lucifer smiles in satisfaction, compelling Demiurge to return the simple gesture. “You understand now, correct?” He asks, causing him to slowly nod in confirmation with tears almost spilling.

Lucifer smiles, an idea forming in his head, “You know what? Father. Demiurge. Tell me something. Out of curiosity, how well can you keep a promise?”

“Um… very well,” Demiurge shakily nods again, his wide and expressive eyes barely holding back the unshed tears.

“Good,” Lucifer shortly remarks in acknowledgment, meanwhile blinking in a rapid session to get a grasp at his bearings. Then with a final blink, his left eye re-emerges, where it was naught but a void a few moments ago, as he wills it into existence again with his newfound power, causing Demiurge to jump slightly. Lucifer simply refocuses and lets go of his grip on his father.

With his arms free, he suddenly hugs him. A simple and pure hug. Demiurge widens in shock, and then he blinks again as if to confirm the current reality, causing his tears to disappear temporarily.

“So, please. Don’t… don’t leave me again, all alone. Promise me.” At this moment… This very brief period, his voice uncharacteristically wavers into a plea, almost nearing desperation for the first time in his unbroken facade. He whispers in a quiet, fragile tone, his eyes glinting with longing. “And, in return, I’ll teach you how to love yourself once more.” Then, he gradually smiles down at Demiurge kindly, the ever-so-cheerful smile from his youth, the look of shining expectations and hope, the charming one he idolized.

Demiurge’s heart quickens. “I promise, Lucifer,” he vows solemnly, his voice breaking with untold emotion. A wide grin forms a silent thank you, almost making him want to cry right then and there.

“It’s going to be okay. And, you… don’t have to put up a pretense and be cheerful all the time. I’m here. I’m here for you,” Lucifer calmly soothes, stroking the back of his blackened hair affectionately. “You… don’t have to hold back anymore. You can truly, honestly cry. It’s okay to be sad, to be human.”

Demiurge’s heart cracks, sinking further into his comforting embrace. “How do you possibly even…? Nevermind, I’ll give it a try,” he slowly, reluctantly nods in confirmation with a contorted smile, a mixture of a teary frown and pure smile fighting against each other.

Meanwhile as Lucifer is hugging him, he lets go of the third hand on his head and points the index finger up, a soft glow emanating from it. The walls of his hell suddenly break down and disappear at the arrival of this light, turning the surroundings into pure white aether. But that isn’t as important as his statement, so he refocuses and stares at Demiurge’s face, observing him warmly.

A small, almost imperceptible tear first forms on the corner of Demiurge’s eye, slowly escaping and trailing down his cheeks. Clutching Lucifer’s jacket, his sobs become muffled against his son’s shoulder, a display of vulnerability for all to see. Before he knows it, a dam breaks within him, a sudden flood hitting him that he hadn’t known he had been holding. The waterfall of them happens to land on his son’s shoulders, the rhythmic sound of droplets echoing across the abyss of hell as he clings to him for support. He finds himself curling inward, hugging Lucifer even closer, desperately holding on.

The overwhelming pain and isolation grip his chest tightly, making it harder to breathe. Yet, despite all of this, the suffocating weight, the loneliness, the self-loathing, a simple, genuine smile inexplicably tugs at his lips. A plain, happy smile. This was the first hug he had in his new life, in fact, the first meaningful contact he had ever received. The longing he so desperately wanted. His desire to bury his face into Lucifer grows ever stronger. And so, he gives in, sobbing uncontrollably as he face-plants into his son’s chest once more.

He continues to cry for what seems like an eternity until he senses his son’s palm gently stroking his back. Lucifer’s faint echo of reassurance moments ago re-emerges in Demiurge’s mind, the warmth and affection lacing through his words he hadn’t ever experienced. Those were new to him. A shaky movement trembles from his small frame, a vibration coursing into Lucifer. His body presses into his, his eyes squeezing shut as if to imprint this tender moment forever. That is the first time someone told him he is loved. That everything is going to be okay.

Because everything is.

But, the end must continue forth.

So, as if marking the end of their chapter in their rather sweet reunion, the surroundings begin to dissolve into entropy. The end of their first meeting. But instead of the all-encompassing black of nothingness, a bright, white light spreads beyond this empty hell, illuminating from Lucifer’s fingertip and radiating outward to the farthest reaches of the universe and beyond. An indication of a new beginning, a new hope. Like a chapter closes, and another opens, the promise and endless possibilities shine dazzlingly he hadn’t believed was possible until now. Demiurge smiles at that thought as everything fades into white.

/===\

(Present.)

Lucifer hums in contentment as he recalls the memory. The conversation that led up to those recollections was two and a half months ago. He still finds it warm and cozy each time he reminisces about the moment. Now, in his desolate Domain, a part of this game his father made, it causes him to inexplicably miss Demiurge’s presence already, the longing to give affection to that little goblin. Even though it hasn’t been that much time since they last met each other, he wonders where he is right now. It’s a real shame that he doesn’t have his power currently while playing this, no omniscience nor omnipotence.

He looks over at the monitoring screen of the village, televising the liveliness and vitality in the villagers’ day-to-day lives on it. But for now, he has a game to play and his people to take care of. Despite their near-limitless potential to be cruel and malevolent, the humans are still one of his favorite races to interact with, being the only few able to make him smile. Excluding his family and mostly his father. Lucifer smiles as he looks over his believers, creating future plans in his mind and the best ways to take care of them and blah blah blah.

Then, suddenly, a portal emerges from the aether in his Domain, signifying an intruder has entered. Speaking of the devil, it’s the cute rascal himself.

“Lucy Lucy! I got great news! I’ve finally met them! Our family.”