(If you're reading this, and I'm dead, skip to page 296 for the beginner's guide of 'do's' and 'don'ts' while living here. A lot of the early parts of my journals are useless for your survival.)

I don't know if anyone's going to read this. I kind of hope not, it's embarrassing to think that someone might get to know me on a level even my sister doesn't didn't. But Melissa said that it might help. She always looks out for me like that, I'm realizing just now… ah man, see what I mean?

Ah whatever. Apparently this is supposed to help me stay in touch with myself. Live long enough here, and you start to forget who you are. Who you were. Time isn't… normal, here, and sometimes that really messes with your head.

I guess… I don't know. It's been a rough couple of months, man. Shit went bad for me really fast. Mentally, I mean, and I'm not srue so sure that I've gotten over it. But I guess no one really gets over it? They just learn how to live with it. I hope that's the case at least.

Anyways… hey world! Hey you! Nice to meet you. Well, not really meet you meet you, but you get what I mean. My name's Ryan. My favorite color's green. I used to really like drawing when I was younger. I mean I still do, it's just harder for me to find the time to do it. Which is kind of funny to think about, you know? I have literally all of the time in the world, I've learned. Well, unless "they" get to me first.

I don't even know what I'm supposed to be writing in here, so I'm kind of rambling. Sorry about that. I guess I'll start with my first day… here. It was rough, man, I'll tell you that right now. I'm pretty sure I cried. Ah damn, that's so embarrassing. Melissa, I swear to god you better not be reading this. If you are, just know that I'm shaming you in my head right now. And probably out of it too, if I ever find out.

Right, my first day. So I was in my sophomore year of college. I think I was in business management class or something, and I was struggling through it. I kept dozing off. Actually, that's what I first thought hap…

I snapped awake, panic flaring through me as I realized I had fallen asleep in class again. That panic turned to annoyance as I looked around and realized no one else was in class.

"Come on man, no one could have woken me up?" I grumbled to myself, rubbing my eyes. I mean sure, I wasn't exactly friends with anyone here, but someone could have at least woken me up to let me know class was over… Then I paused.

There was a sound coming from all around me. Simultaneous, this sort of small clattering that was echoing through the room. I frowned, before I noticed a pen drop to the floor by my right.

I glanced around, and sure enough that cascading noise was coming from pens and pencils rattling across empty desks. Some stopped just short of falling off, others following through with their inanimate leaps of freedom to the floor below. In the moment it took me to piece that together, I realized something else.

Backpacks were still here. Purses and bags were slung across chairs or resting beneath desks, and that wasn't the only thing. I saw more than a couple of laptops sitting open, and the projector at the front was still running, stopped at a slide showing a "dispersion of responsibility" chart, and now my frustration had given way to confusion.

Had there been some kind of alarm I'd slept through? How was that even possible? And, more than that, how had nobody woken me up? I ruled that out immediately. Sure, I didn't have any friends in this class, but I was friendly enough with a few that they would've woken me for this.

Some kind of prank, then? Maybe they'd pop back in after a few moments, recording my reaction to post to YouTube or something. I was kind of notorious for sleeping through this class, it was just something I needed to fill out my credits.

That could be it. I waited for a little while, before I pulled out my phone and checked the time.

10:17. And it was…

Oh, it was my birthday. I somehow forgot about that. I was kind of dreading all of the happy birthday texts I'd have to respond to, but I'd deal with that later.

I checked around again, but no one was bursting through the doors to record my reaction. I frowned, before I decided to text my buddy.

Bro, I think my class is pranking me.

I waited for the message to go through, but sighed as I got the "error, text not sent" message. I had full bars! I tried to resend it a couple of times, but nada. No luck. Knew I shouldn't have switched to T-Mobile.

I huffed, pocketing my phone and standing up. I walked down the steps to the exit doors of the classroom. I figured I'd pull a reverse on them, if they were going to take this long to finish their damn joke. I pushed open the doors, sticking my head out into the hallway.

"Alright, you thought you could…" I began, then trailed off.

The hallway was empty.

I looked down both sides, and saw a couple of lonely backpacks sitting crumpled in the hall, some of them directly in the middle of what would be foot traffic.

Wait, had I really missed an alarm? And no one had woken me up? What the fuck?

I looked back at the empty classroom, before pulling my phone out again and trying to see if I had received any messages about this. But again, nothing, and any texts I tried to send to my friends kept getting that error.

The annoyance was wearing off, giving way to something deeper, something colder. I swallowed, then hesitantly stepped into the hallway, the door shutting with a metallic ring behind me.

"Hello?" I called, my voice echoing hollowly through the hallway. No one answered.

I wandered down the hall, poking my head into each classroom and finding that same sight. Empty desks, left behind backpacks, and open laptops.

And I think that's when I noticed it.

The silence.

It was that kind of eerie quiet that you never noticed a building could have, until the sound you were used to it being flooded by was absent.

Thoroughly creeped out by now, and more than a little worried, I jogged to the nearest stairwell I could find. Taking the steps two at a time until I got to the bottom, I pulled out my phone for a third time, trying to call someone. Anyone. But every attempt made was met with a 'call failed' boop.

I bit my lower lip, exiting the stairwell and jogging to an exit door. Now that I was closer to the outer walls of my school, I could hear noise coming from outside. And it was loud, even muffled by the thick walls of my university. I pushed open the door, and was assaulted by what sounded like hundreds of car alarms echoing across the campus grounds from the city.

I stopped, freezing in my tracks. There were dozens, hundreds of cars stalled out in the streets, most having slammed into each other and crumpling, and some even having ran through buildings. More than a few were on fire, a baker's dozen blazes burning brightly in the late morning light.

Okay. Now I was scared.

I dialed 911, but again that fucking boop. I called my family, and again, nothing. That fear was now ripping its way through my chest and nestling into my gut, making it hard to breathe. What was I supposed to do? What was happening?

I hesitated for a brief moment, debating on whether or not to hop in my car, but I did not feel comfortable driving with all of that going on. And, if I was honest, I didn't trust myself to drive. So I ran across the campus grounds in a full sprint towards my dorm, Alice Lloyd hall.

"HELLO!?" I yelled as I crossed the street, the alarms blaring from the cars shutting off one by one. "HEEEELLLLOOOO!!!???"

Nothing.

With the car alarms gone, all that met my shouts was silence.

I continued to run, not sure what else to do. I needed to get to my dorm. I needed to be somewhere that wasn't so suffocatingly quiet.

Unauthorized use of content: if you find this story on Amazon, report the violation.

As I ran, I tried to hunt for anyone, anything. I saw dogs wandering through the streets, empty leashes and loose harnesses trailing behind them. They looked just as confused as I did, sniffing around or gathering together. A couple looked at me running, whining before they continued to search for their owners. Trash and debris littered the streets, half-eaten food dropped exactly where the person who should have been holding them vanished.

What should I do? What was I supposed to do? I couldn't think of anything but just getting to my dorm, and that's exactly what I did, practically ripping open the doors to Lloyd hall and bounding up the steps to the third floor. All of the lounge areas were empty, cups of coffee spilled onto the floor, laptops dumped onto their sides. I ignored it all, rushing to my dorm room and forcing my key into the lock.

It took a few tries, my hands were shaking too badly. My key scraped and scratched against the knob of the door before I could fit it in, and I shoved it open, slamming the door behind me.

I looked at my roommate's side of the room. His bed was half-made, just as it had been when I left. All of his things were there. The posters of Metallica and Skillet tacked onto the wall, a dark tablet on his desk and the stylus he used to draw on it laying next to it. Everything was there, except for his backpack and computer. Except for him.

For some reason, the thought of his bag being one of the ones just lying abandoned in the university's hallway sent a shiver down my spine, my throat squeezing tight painfully. Tears sprang into my eyes, and I stumbled my way onto my bed, collapsing onto it. I shoved my face into my pillow, trying

I felt numb. I felt lost. My head was blank, absent of anything except for an overwhelming sense of fear and… I didn't know. I didn't know what to do. What could I do?

For a while, I just laid there. I don't know how long I spent, thinking of nothing and everything all at once. Where were my friends? My family? Where was anyone, and why wasn't I there with them? Why was I here?

It wasn't until I felt my stomach churn painfully that I remembered I hadn't eaten breakfast.

I sat up, my brain finally starting to work again. I checked my phone, and saw the time. 12:04. I'd spent at least an hour and a half doing… nothing.

I took a deep breath. Inhaled it in, exhaled it out. Inhale, exhale. Inhale, exhale.

Okay. First, sorry Brandon, I'm raiding your minifridge.

I popped to my feet, pulling open the door to his jealously guarded fridge. I'd always begged him to let me put stuff in there, and he'd always said the same thing: get your own. Well, not today buddy. What's yours is now mine. Until you come back.

Please come back.

Still feeling somewhat guilty, I rooted around in his mini fridge, snagging a couple of cans of Dr. Pepper from his stash, and an untouched Jimmy John's sub. I tore open the paper and scarfed down the sandwich, grateful that he always got one ahead of time. I doubted I was in the right mental state to go back outside and see… well, not see anyone.

Cracking open the can, I opened my phone as I took a gulp of good ol' Dr. P. Which was something I would never say out loud, when I thought about it.

I hoped it would be different, but sure enough, all of my texts were still showing that 'not sent' error. I opened up my sister's contact first, scrolling up. No messages that would even allude to something like this. I repeated the process for the rest of my family, then my friends. And then, out of curiosity, I opened up google.

…

It loaded.

It loaded?

It loaded!

I quickly tested the rest of the internet, and sure enough, everything was loading just fine. Okay, so internet was still here. Which meant social network sites were still here! I opened up instagram on my phone, and tried scrolling through my feed. Everything was there. Posts, comments, everything. But…

Nothing updated past 10:13 this morning. I tried to post a comment, but got an 'error posting comment. Please try again later.' I tried this with everything I could think of, facebook, twitter, even fucking youtube. Nothing new, nothing past 10:13, and I couldn't post any comments.

Alright. So I couldn't contact anyone, but I at least had internet. But that caused a thought to form, as I took another sip of my soda.

How long would that last?

If no one was around to operate anything, how long would anything last?

Okay, google time! Thank god for google.

…

Alright, so things aren't looking great.

I hadn't even thought of nuclear power plants. Thankfully those should be mostly fine, but I'd stay away from them just in case. Also, planes. I guess I was lucky no planes were flying overhead. I'm not sure how I would have handled seeing them start to drop out of the sky.

But as for everything else, it looks like I have the next day, maybe two, to get myself sorted. First things first, download survival guides to my phone. Youtube tutorials, maybe? How to set up generators, get potable water, stuff like that, and… shit it's already 12:30.

I stood up, biting my thumb painfully hard. Just enough to stop myself from panicking. I was probably still panicking, I was still feeling kind of numb, but I was at least functional.

I shuffled over to my desk, pulling open the drawer and taking out a notebook and a pen. I hesitated for a few moments, before charting out my next week of activities. First thing first, grab as much ice and perishable goods for the next couple of weeks as I could. The mini fridge was not going to cut it. Second; solar power battery banks for my phone and tablet, generators, and learning how to get power to my building. I probably couldn't stay in the dorms, it would cost way too much electricity to run. So a small house.

On and on I charted, until I looked at my phone and saw another thirty minutes had passed, between googling my most important next steps and how to do them. I could probably try to keep the local power grid running, but doing that would cost too much time to learn, and it would fail eventually at a higher level in the chain. And I only had the power of the internet as long as I had the power of electricity.

I didn't know how long this would last, but I should try and prepare for the next month at least. Hope for the best, prepare for the worst, you know?

And then a thought hit me.

It slammed into my chest with the force of a sledgehammer.

I thought a month would be the worst case. Maybe a year tops.

But what if…

What if this was it?

What if this was just my life now?

I felt myself start to spiral again, and I bit my thumb. Harder this time. Hard enough that I felt the nail began to creak and crack.

I could worry about that later. For now, I had to get back to my car and load up on supplies. And then I had to house hunt.

Pushing all of my other thoughts out and away, I took another deep breath, grabbed my notebook, and stood. I had to move and get this plan going, or I was going to sit in that chair and spiral out. Alright world, I'm ready for you-

Ah damn, I forgot my phone. Okay, now I'm ready for you!

I stood in the doorway of my new house, looking around the dark interior of the living room. The TV was still on, the only source of light available inside. The sun had now set completely, and I was left with only that single screen, drawn to it as a moth was drawn to a flame.

It was playing Jeopardy.

I tore my eyes from the tv, setting my bags down onto the ground. I'd gotten most of what I needed, the rest loaded into the truck of my car or on my tomorrow to-do list. I was ready to move in to my new home. I just needed to be able to see to do it.

I looked at the living room light switch, and for some reason, a part of me dreaded flipping it. If I did, I'd see what kind of life the people who lived here had. Who they were, what they liked. Pictures, maybe art hung up on the fridge.

And I'd see that they're just as gone as everyone else.

I shook my head, then forced myself to walk forward. Step after treacherous step on soft carpet, I flipped the switch.

"Let there be light." I muttered, looking around.

It was very homey. The walls were a warm green, with earthy brown furniture to compliment it. I saw pictures hanging up on the wall, of a woman and a man smiling as they held each other in different parts of their life. A cruise ship. The woman cornily propping up the leaning tower of Pisa with her hands. The man grinning as he tossed pizza dough in the kitchen. I looked at that same kitchen, my eyes drawn to the fridge, and my heart caught in my throat.

There was an ultrasound picture held up by a magnet.

I swallowed thickly, closing my eyes and taking another deep breath, before letting it out shakily. I opened my eyes again, and took down the picture frames one by one. I hesitated, my hands shaking as I peeled off the ultrasound picture… before I decided to put it back. Then, I put a picture of the woman and man - together - next to it.

That would be my reminder.

Eventually, they'd come back to their home.

I looked at the pictures I'd placed for a few moments longer, and then opened the fridge and started loading it with groceries and bags of ice. When I was done, I walked to the bedroom. More pictures, more things I had to take down, before I crawled into the bed - my bed - and kicked off my shoes and socks.

As I laid there, struggling to fall asleep, I was once again hit by just how quiet the world was now. How silent everything could be, without people in it.

Heat built into the back my throat, forming a lump of molten iron that I couldn't swallow away.

I sobbed, heaving in air that was immediately choked away with another gasp of tears. For the first time, in a long time, I sobbed my heart out.

Because for the first time, in a long time, I was truly alone.