The days began to blend for Painin in his new life at the Keep. His mornings were spent running and helping Monroe attend to the daily needs of Commander Novik. He had finally had a breakthrough with Monroe who had finally accepted him if not fully trusting him after Painin had given him some sort of fancy coffee. He had come across a small bag of it while cleaning up inside Master Pierce’s room. He had been surprised that it was even there and suggested that Painin gift it to the Veteran soldier.

The atmosphere in the kitchen of the Keep also seemed to change as the women that oversaw that domain also seemed to receive him better. He wished that he could say the same for his interactions with the Appraiser Johnson and the Ferret but sadly they still treated him with snide remarks and general rudeness.

His time with the guardsmen also became more frequent as Marki assigned him turns at different nonvital duty stations within the Keep. His skills also progressed with his weapons training and his time with Master Nich became more about finding his inner calm and center. He said it would help him release the rage and sorrow inside him.

“Focus on the flame inside your mind. Push every other thought away inside of your mind. Leave nothing there but a void with a single lit candle inside it. Only the flame of the candle exists, and I want you to push your feelings into it. Everything else goes away or into the flame.” He said while kneeling across from Painin with his hands on his thighs open and palms up.

“Control the flame it can grow hotter as you feed it but do not allow it to grow in size. Listen to my voice and allow it to guide you in maintaining its size and shape.”

Painin sighed and settled down picturing the candle and flame in his mind. He followed the lead of Master Nich’s words and worked on clearing his mind of thoughts. The flame flickered as he looked at it in his mind. He tried to push his thoughts and raw emotions into the flame and at first, the flame began to change color turning a bright red. He pushed more of his emotions into it and it began to turn bluer becoming more purple in color.

The flame continued to grow in both size and intensity until the only thing inside the void was the flame. It consumed everything it encountered until there was no room left in the void. Just as suddenly there was a large explosion inside his head, and everything went dark.

He came awake to find himself laying on the ground with Master Nich kneeling over him.

“I am not sure what happened to you, but you suddenly cried out and seized up before falling over unconscious. Some brundle root under your nose brought you out of it luckily.”

Painin groaned and started to sit up when waves of nausea rolled over him and he threw up. Master Nich continued to kneel near him and placed his hand on his back until he finally stopped.

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“I am sorry Master.” Painin croaked.

Master Nich stood up and moved over to the water bucket and pulled out the ladle full of water and offered it to him. Painin sipped at the water slowly allowing the cool water to soothe his hurting throat.

“Take your time and regain yourself.” Said the Master as he turned and began to walk towards the door to his private chamber. At the door, he stopped and looked back at him.

“Meet me back here tomorrow and we will try again to control the flame. Now clean up your mess before you go.” He opened the door and walked through it leaving Painin still kneeling on the floor.

“You said it was a meditation exercise?” Master Pierce asked him after taking a sip from his cup and looking up from the large tome he was looking through.

“Yes, Master. I was focusing on a candle flame in my mind and feeding my emotions into it. It seemed to grow on its own and I couldn’t control it. Then everything went black and I woke up on the floor.”

“It almost sounds like one of the tests they give to new potential candidates at the Hall of Magic. I have never heard of it being used outside of the order, however.” He stared into his cup as he swirled the reddish-brown liquid around.

“In the order, the reaction like you described is only found in those who have a high magical presence in them. You did say something about your mother having Elven blood in her family line. There might be truth to that story. Blood doesn’t lie. That reminds me that I want to study your blood.”

Painin stared at him from across the room and silently judged the distance to the door.

The metal ingot glowed as he pulled it from the fire of the forge. Master Nich placed it on the anvil and using a metal chisel he began to strike it with a hammer to draw a grove down the middle of it. As the ingot heated up, he watched the flames dance around the metal. Once it was hot enough, he pulled it back out and began to hammer it over onto itself as sparks flew off with every strike. Once the color had faded again, he replaced it in the forge allowing it to once again attain the proper color.

Moving over to the barrel of water he drank from the ladle and whipped the sweat from his brow with the sleeve of his jerkin. Working metal gave him a different way to clear his mind and think about things going on. He took another long drink of water before going back to the forge and pulling forth the block of metal and repeating the process of scoring it and folding it back over again on itself. Once he had folded it over enough times, he marked the ingot before placing it on the sand table to cool off slowly.

Never before had he seen someone have that sort of reaction to the meditation ritual and to be honest it had scared him when the boy had screamed and collapsed. His choice to use brundle root from his supply from home left his already dwindling supply dangerously low. Moving into his room he removed his heavy leather apron and jerkin and hung it up on a peg.

He took a cloth and dipped it into a small wooden bowl of water and whipped the sweat from his upper arms and chest before kneeling on the small rug in front of his bed. Taking a steading breath, he pulled out the ornate box from under his bed and opening it removed a piece of the brundle root which he placed into a small stone bowl on the floor and lit it on fire using a firestick.

Once it caught flame, he allowed it to burn for a few moments before blowing it out and letting it smolder. He knelt in front of the bowl on the rug and allowed the smoke to curl around his body before breathing deeply in. Allowing the smoke to do its job he followed it into his memories of his past and looked upon his wife and children as he had last seen them alive back home. He smiled at the memories as tears rolled down his face and landed on the mat as the world outside went away.