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A Drop of Existential Horror
I write Sins not Tragedies

I write Sins not Tragedies

"So… these are my new retainers?" Riya said as she went through the papers, "Three Knights, six scholars and five attendants?"

"For now these are your to-be retainers, yes," Jayden said. "You’ll have to conduct an interview for them, Max, Sally, Harry and Maria got more because of the workload they have but you can always hire more if you want-?"

"Oh no it's fine!" Riya interrupted, "I was just wondering why I would need so many attendants?"

Jayden gave her a are-you-serious look. "That's less than the average number of attendants most of us have." Jayden said. "You're basically starting up your own company right now, you're going to need all the help you can get."

Right… Riya really doubted she needed so many retainers but she didn't want to sound ungrateful or anything, "Sure whatever you say, but, I don’t know how to run a business?."

“Shuu will take care of that.” Jayden said, “All you have to do is, well, socialise, promote and make the items, you can do that right? Or do you have stage fright?"

"I can do it." Riya said a bit stiffly, "I'm not scared of having to talk to someone for just a few minutes." Riya was definitely scared, but Shuu was going to do so much for her… Running a company wasn't easy as much as she knew about legal businesses and companies and what not (most of her knowledge about business came from Merchant of Antonia, and the completion in the book was fierce, also from her time at Uni but she didn't pay much attention to economics back then) The least she could do was, you know, try to socialise and promote the stuff. "So… what percentage of the cut is mine?"

"Well…" Jayden said, looking up from the paperwork he was doing, "You're reinventing paper, the printing press, fountain pens and ink to go with the fountain pens and printing press, so you'll get a patent for those."

"But patents don't exist in this universe?" Riya pointed out, atleast, the book never alluded to anything called 'patents' or 'copyright' or 'trademark' or 'public domain' existing in-universe.

"Well, we're Aubs now so we can easily make those using country-wide contract papers." Jayden said as he went back to doing his paperwork.

Country-wide contract papers?! "But those are expensive!"

Jayden nodded, "Two large gold coins per contract, it isn't cheap, half the price comes from the high-quality parchment and high-quality inks needed to write the contract on, but after paper and ink are re-invented, the price would drop massively for us and we'll be able to reinvent other things we'd need and get patents and copyrights for them at a lesser price while at the same time, stopping other Prefectures from stealing our designs and money."

That made some sense to Riya, "So… how long do the patents for these will last?"

"About thirty to fifty years, haven't decided it yet."

"As in… Earth years?"

"No, New Rome years."

Oh.. That was a long time, "Is it ok to have them last… so long?"

"Well Aureus and the King… Zent… They literally set us up with a Prefecture knowing we don't have any Mana and would have had us executed if we failed, and not only that but the rest of the Prefectures watched doing absolutely nothing, some of them even treating it as a spectacle, they can cope." Jayden said with a dark look in his eyes.

Well when Jayden put it that… "True… You three didn't tell us that the rest of the Prefectures were there."

"We had a long day, we just wanted to say the most important stuff and go to bed." Jayden said coolly. Jayden put down his quill and just stared at the papers in front of him for five whole minutes. Riya was about to ask him what was wrong when he suddenly asked, "Say… You want to make inks right?"

Where was this going? "Uh… Yes?"

"Do you know how to make ink in the first place?"

How dare he?! Riya knew all about inks. Thank you very much! She even read a couple of Wiki How articles on how to make ink! "Yes I do." She said, testily, "Why?"

"Oh you know… I was just wondering…"

"Yes?" She asked, she hated it when people were so twisty when they wanted to say something, just ask your question damnit! It was bad enough She had to interact with people in the first place, don't make it longer! It was eating away into her reading time! Not that she had many books, most of the books she used to read were fanfics downloaded onto her computer… she only had fiction and other hard copy 'actual' books she'd read. Also why did he suddenly get so… This? They were having a nice conversation just a few minutes ago!

"Do you know how to make invisible ink?" Jayden asked, this time without beating the bush.

Riya thought for a second, "Yes I do." She replied slowly, "But why do you care?"

"Oh… You know…" He said, looking down at the papers he had.

Riya didn't understand what he wanted to say, "No I don't know, tell me."

Jayden took longer to respond this time, as if he was debating with himself on if he should say it or not, finally, he took another look at the papers in his hands as he let out a deep sigh, "I'm actually quite scared." He admitted, "Being in this world, chances of being found out are moderately high… I just want to make sure… we all get out of this relatively unharmed, you know what I mean?"

"What does that have to do with invisible ink?"

Jayden hesitated again but spoke anyway, "Do you ever wonder if… Well…" Jayden started to hesitate again, he started to play with the parchment in his hand, "I- well- I uh- protection- Look. I want a way to be able to send each other invisible letters just in case."

"Invisible letters?" The thought had never crossed Riya's mind before, "Why?"

"Not like invisible letters as in the whole page being blank when sending it, that would be too suspicious… I was thinking that we use invisible writing in any normal letters we send to each other because writing in English is also a bit… suspicious…?"

"You mean like, say normal stuff in normal ink and then the actual content of the paper in invisible ink so if any Noble miraculously cracked the code on how English is translated into German, they still wouldn't be able to get any important secrets?" Riya asked.

Jayden took a few seconds to respond, "Yes…" He said, "Exactly what I meant…"

"Well why didn't you say so!" Riya exclaimed, "Well.." She started to explain how invisible ink was made, "Usually any citrus works, but lemon juice works the best, to reveal the message, the letter needs to be slightly burnt so just holding the paper a couple of inches away from the flame should be enough to make the message show." She said, nodding, "Ya that's basically it."

"Thank you." Jayden said with a smile, "I'll let the others know…" Jayden started to organise the paperwork, "I'm done with the papers now, I need to give these to Shuu and Melissa."

"What are those papers about?" Riya asked.

"Oh nothing much." Jayden said a little evasively, "Just a couple of contracts. Also," He started, pulling out a ring from his pockets, “This one is for you.”

Riya took the ring, it felt a little heavy and there was a symbol of an eleven-pointed star on it, Ok what the fuck?

“It’s your Aub ring.” Jayden explained, “To show that you’re an Aub of Harmonia, also Harry managed to ‘hook it up to the foundation’ or so he says. Any blessings you receive will be transferred to the Prefecture foundation if you’re inside the Prefecture, if you aren’t then the mana transfer will happen once you step into the Prefecture, he’s currently working on being able to give blessings with the ring and use the ring to do actual magic but so far he has no results.”

“The fact that he attempted to do this and basically succeeded halfly impresses me.” Riya said, “We’ve only been here for what? Two days?”

Jayden nodded at that, “It is impressive, I asked him about it you know? He said it was like ‘programming a computer’!”

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Riya’s mouth felt dry, “Hello.” She said to the new faces in front of her, “My name is Projookta Karmakar, but please feel free to call me Riya.” Her voice just barely managed to be level and not crack.

The fourteen retainers in front of her kneeled and had their hands crossed across their chests and their heads down.

“May I pray for a blessing in appreciation of this serendipitous meeting, ordained by the vibrant flowers of Persephone, the Goddess of Spring?” They all asked in unison.

Relax Riya… You’ve read this happens… This is how Nobles greet each other, “You may.” She said, trying to look a bit more regale, she was an Aub now, act like it dammit!

“Oh Persephone, Goddess of Spring. May you grant Lady Riya your blessing.” A gold drop of mana floated towards her and into her ring, it took every drop of Riya’s almost non-existent self control to not ‘ooh’ and ‘ahh’ at the sight, it reminded her of the floating lanterns scene in Tangled for some reason.

“Everyone, please follow me to the dining room.” She said, and led them to the dining room adjacent to the living room of the palace where she and the other ten ‘Messengers’ had been living for the past few days. The room was very large and had a colour code of white and red with these large windows and ceiling-to-floor curtains to go along with it.

As she entered and stood next to the host seat (because she was the host obviously she would be sitting in the host seat) she gestured to the table, “Everyone, please sit down, after all, it is lunch time isn't it? You all must be hungry, we can conduct the next part of the interview after eating, but before that, I know your names but do not know the faces to go with the names. What are your names? How old are you? And do any of you have any special interests? Any hobbies?” You can know a lot about a person if you ask them about their hobbies.

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Everyone started to sit down, she watched them all take their seats and their reactions as well as how close they were sitting next to her. All the women seemed to sit the closest to her while all the men sat the farthest.

The lady on her right had deep green eyes and midnight blue hair, she was one of the ones who washed her hands with the water. "My name is Amelia, My Lady, and I am twenty-five years old. In the moments when I find respite from my duties, I take immense pleasure in serenading with my voice, My Lady."

The next one was a girl with bubblegum pink hair, interestingly enough, she had a Bob cut like Maria, she had also chosen to wash her hands with the water, "My name is Sentisia, My Lady. I have seen twenty summers, and my heart finds solace in the discipline of training during my precious moments of leisure."

The one after that had blonde hair and dark brown eyes, "My name is Sophean, My Lady. I am twenty years old, and I have a deep passion for the art of breeding Veilchens, which I cultivate during my leisure hours."

The one after that had straight black hair that came up to her shoulders, "My name is Carollette. I am nineteen years old, and I possess a deep affection for the art of sewing, which I find to be a soothing and creative pursuit, My Lady."

"My name is Viola." The next one said, she also had black hair, "I am sixteen years old, and my heart resonates with the joy of singing, My Lady."

The subsequent introduction was made by a young man who exuded a lot of enthusiasm. "My name is Sebastto," he declared, "I am fourteen years old and find immense joy in playing the harspiel during my moments of leisure, My Lady."

Next another guy followed Sebastto's introduction with a bright smile. "My name is Bendolo," he stated, "I am thirteen years old, and I dedicate my free time to rigorous training, My Lady."

The introductions then shifted to the otherside of the table, "My name is Schaium, My Lady. I am fourteen years old and take great delight in the world of books, which I eagerly explore in my leisure hours."

Riya was already forgetting all their names, their names sounded so similar to each other the names seemed to warp and bend inside her mind till it all became a jumble of nothing in her mind, still, the next boy started to talk, "My name is Shivan," he said, "I am sixteen years old, and I find solace in the practice of sword fighting during my precious moments of leisure."

"My name is Lauroon," The next one introduced himself, "I am twenty-three years old and derive immense pleasure from the world of theater, particularly the captivating plays that grace our stages, My Lady." The way he smiled, it looked… Weird… Was she overthinking this? Riya thought she saw a glint of malice or something in his eyes, maybe she should find out more about him later…

The next few names passed in a blur.

"My name is Bianna, My Lady. I am twelve years old, and my heart is filled with the joy of singing, which I embrace with great enthusiasm."

"My name is Madonna, My Lady. I am fifteen years old and take delight in the graceful art of whirling, a dance that fills my soul with joy."

"My name is Evanne, My Lady. I am sixteen years old and have a deep passion for the art of sewing, where every stitch weaves a tale of creativity and expression."

"My name is Isobella," she declared, "I am nineteen years old and take great pleasure in playing the harspiel, an instrument that allows me to channel my emotions and creativity, My Lady."

After the introductions were done, Riya gave a large smile. "I am so very thankful each and every one of you has decided to become my retainer! Please, enjoy a few delicacies from my homeland!"

She steadied her nerves, it was time for the test. Betty and Bertha, the commoner chefs, brought in bowls of warm soapy water (the soap was a prototype Valerie made for themselves because most Nobles used a 'wasshen' or whatever to clean themselves) and placed the bowls in front of each of them and herself. "Please use the bowls of water to wash your hands or cast a wasshen if you'd wish too."

She dipped her hand into her own bowl and wiped it down with a napkin, she watched a couple of others do the same while a few chose to wasshen their hands… Like that Laurenroon guy or whatever… Interesting…

Betty and Bertha took away the bowls.

A few more commoner attendants came in with those grey domes seen in movies and fancy restaurants, covering their food, they placed the covered food in front of the seated dinners and once all the plates had been placed in front of them, the attendants took the dome, revealing the food inside.

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“The reise has been cooked in a special way and is now called ‘polao’, the other two dishes on the plate are ‘paneerer torkari’ and the other dish is called ‘mangsher torkari’.” She said, guestering to the paneer torkari and mangsho (mutton) torkari

She then showed them how to break the rice and slowly add the paneer torkari first (veg first! Then non veg! But only if they are both the same gravy level, if one is a bit heavier than the other then the lighter curry should be eaten first!) and showed them how to eat with their hands.

As she was eating, one of the ladies, Binaca (or something like that), one of the ones who casted a wasshen on their hands, started to question her, "My Lady, if I may be so bold, why do you choose to partake in such a... rustic manner this evening?" Her voice had a tinge of disgust in it as far as Riya could tell with her limited understanding of tone (which meant the other dinner guests definitely heard it).

Riya gave a smile and started to baffle them with her bullshit, "I do this as an homage to the goddess of cooking, to honour her divine gift of flavour. It is said that by feeling the textures and savouring the essence of the dish through one's touch, one connects more deeply with the culinary artistry."

That seemed to placate her a little, so she started to eat as Riya had shown her how to eat. After eating a bite, Bianna gave a smile of delight, "Lady Riya," she began, her eyes became so wide Riya thought they would pop out of her skull, "This Paneer and Polao is truly exceptional. The paneer is so tender, it practically melts in your mouth, and the spices... they're a symphony of flavours! But, I must say, it carries a hint of spice."

Riya felt pretty happy at the compliment, the other Nobles had the same expression as Bianna's, nodded graciously. "I'm delighted that you find it to your liking," she replied. "The Paneer and Polao is a treasured dish from my homeland, where we embrace the boldness of spices. The heat, you see, is an integral part of our culinary tradition."

Actually the paneer she gave the Nobles were way milder in spice then hers cuz Leo thought they wouldn't be able to handle the heat because they weren't used to eating spicy food. He was right, she could see more than a few hands go for the water goblets.

"It's quite exquisite," Sebastian said, taking another bite and savouring the intricate blend of flavours. "The spices, while fiery, add a depth that's truly remarkable. It's a testament to your skill, My Lady."

Riya smiled and slowly came up with a response, "Your kind words warm my heart. The beauty of diverse cuisines lies in their ability to evoke emotions and create lasting memories. I'm thrilled that you're enjoying this taste of my homeland."

Everyone seemed to be having a great time, except for one. "But, My Lady, such practices are hardly befitting of your esteemed station. Should we not uphold the decorum and etiquette expected of our lineage?" Leroon said. Interestingly enough, he chose to use the fork and knife and as far as she remembered, he used a wasshen instead of choosing the bowl, not that those two points mattered much to Riya, it was the question that sent her spiralling.

Fuck FUCK FUCK! What to say?!

Ok… calm down… She's got this! "Decorum, my dear companion," she said, "Is but a tapestry woven by the norms of our society. The true nobility lies in embracing diversity and appreciating the artistry of life in all its forms."

And so the lunch continued.

After everyone had finished the paneer torkari, Riya took the taste test for the mangsho torkari as well as how to remove any bones in the meat.

Everyone said they loved the food even though a lot of the retainers were drinking water by the litres.

Laroon, as expected, was having a difficult time trying to eat the mutton with all the bones in the mutton and him not being able to stab and cut as a result. Even after he realised what was happening, he still tried to use his knife and fork.

As a result he wasn't able to eat the main part of the meal (cuz paneer wasn't filling at all!) And kept shovelling rice into his mouth. He was probably going to leave the table hungry.

Good.

Fucker deserved it.

Ok maybe she was being a bit too harsh but she really didn't like how her authority (and her culture, mostly her culture) was being disrespected (She was his Aub dammit!).

Leo told her how he was going to be spreading tacos and Nachos as a trend later, how the hell was lurenroon going to keep up with trends after that? Eat nachos with a fork and knife and delicately dip it into the dip? She'd like to see him try!

Riya looked at the table, everyone (except for larooni) had finished or were on the verge of finishing the meal, so Riya looked at the far end of the room (the entrance) and nodded to the servants to bring in the bowls of soapy water.

They were done eating after all.

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"So?" Riya asked, looking back behind her after the all possible retainers left, "What do you two think?"

"I think that lauroon is sus as Hell." Maria said, walking out of her hiding spot behind the curtains, "Don't take him in as your retainer."

Lauroon? That was his name?!

“I agree with Maria.” Shuu said, coming out of his own hiding spot behind another set of curtains, “He’s hiding something… I just know it… We should give him to Jayden, he’ll figure out who he is in no time.”

“He could.” Riya agreed, “But he’s like… Super busy isn’t he? He’s dealing with new trends, the logistics of the new castle and capital with Max and writing up contracts for all the new retainers…”

“She does have a point.” Maria said, “But since Riya said he's writing up the contracts, we should at least tell him about the possible-situation we might have here so he could add in a few extra clauses for Lauroon, who knows? He could have been a spy for some winning Prefecture during the war and now the other Prefecture wants him to keep an eye on us or something…”

Riya had to agree with that, it all kinda made sense to her. “Ya… I guess you’re right…” Then she started to ask a few other questions she had in mind, “How was the lunch though?! I hosted it well, didn't I?!” She didn’t falter much at all!

“It was good, but it wasn’t as entertaining as watching Shuu force Nobles to use chopsticks for the first time… And use it to eat rice… That was kinda mean now that I think about it…” Maria said. “Mean but funny.”

“I was simply weeding out the lazy morons who thought they could work for me and get easy money, easy fame and thought their ranks could get them whatever they wanted.” Shuu said with a shrug, “Nothing too serious or extravagant, just taking them a bit out of their comfort zone and a little kick off their high horses to see which way they would fall.”

It was a one way massacre if Riya was remembering today morning correctly, Nobles had never touched chopsticks before so their hands weren’t used to it and kept dropping their food, and the rice grains were so small they barley had more than one or two grains of rice every time they tried to pick up the rice with their chopsticks. Nobles were also expected to do everything gracefully and perfectly whenever they were in public so when they failed that hard in front of other Nobles…

“I’m surprised you didn’t kick out Laroon like I did to all those who dropped their chopsticks so they could use the forks and knives.” Shuu said, “It was quite insulting to you, you know? You were his superior and were showing him how to properly eat… And yet he had the audacity to pick up the cutlery…”

Riya waved her hand, “It’s fine, Seeing his face get frustrated when he couldn’t pick up the food was entertaining enough, seeing everyone else enjoy the food while he couldn’t due to his own ego was probably frustrating him, also since he wasn’t able to eat he left the dinner table hungry and must have been hungry for even longer as he had to tell this cooks to cook him a meal which would take more time. That couldn’t have happened if I just kicked him out, he would have just gone to his cooks and have gotten a meal in a much shorter time.”

“Hmm… Ya that does sound like good revenge.” Maria said.

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Something was definitely off, at least, that’s what Riya thought.

A few days had gone by, and now it was time for the retainers to be finalised and for them to sign the contracts.

All Riya could smell was lemons.

“Do you like it?” Jayden said to the crowd of Aubs of Harmonia and to their to-be retainers, “Sally and I made a citrus scent so the castle can smell like fruits and fresh air~!”

“Sally!” Riya said, “Jayden! A word if you two have the time?” She said with a strained smile, “Right now?”

The three of them excused themselves and moved into a smaller side room. “Yes?” Jayden asked.

“Don’t ‘Yes?’ ME!” Riya yelled, “Does Sally Know?!” Did she know that Jayden was using her and the new reinvented lemon air freshener as a front and was actually making the retainers sign contracts with god-knows-what-clauses with invisible ink?!

“Do I know about the invisible ink?” Sally asked as if they were simply talking about the weather, “Yes, Yes I do.”

Riya was confused, “Then why are you-”

“Riya… I really like you.” Sally said, “You seem like a very bright girl who had a very bright future ahead of her… Most of us had bright futures ahead of us… Futures that were snapped away and tossed aside… Leaving us here… In a country that determines your worth on how much Mana is in your veins. We don’t have a single drop of Mana in any of our veins, we can’t do feats of impossible tasks like ‘crush’ everyone in the room with a simple thought… The only reason why we’re here and not dead or being tortured or even worse… Is because we’re lying to them.”

Jayden continued from that point, “What happens if a few retainers find out what we actually are? What if other Prefectures pay them to tell them our secrets? What do we do when they find out we’re just a bunch of nobodies from a Manaless world? What do you think they will do to us, Riya?”

Riya stayed silent… What would they do to them? Perhaps… Kill them all? But Riya didn’t want to die… She was only nineteen… She wanted to experience life and all that there was to offer! She wanted to eat ice-cream with her friends and read all the books she could find and write fanfiction whenever she could and just talk about fandom drama with other dedicated fans! She didn’t want to die…

But… At the same time… Was what was happening right? Was this coercion? Slavery? Could making other people unknowingly sign away certain freedoms and rights just so she could live… Was it even ethical?

“If they are good retainers later on.” Sally started, “The invisible rules won’t even matter in the first place. All we’re asking of them is to not betray us in any way, we’re asking them not to betray us to other Prefectures, isn’t that the minimum an Aub should expect from their retainers? Not to commit treason?”

Still… “What if… they break a rule in the contract?” Riya said.

“Then they will be sent to the Ivory tower, where they can live the rest of their days, they won’t die even though they would have committed treason against the state, they’ll be alive, but they’ll be Mana batteries for the rest of their lives.”

Riya said nothing after that and they simply went back to the procession in the other room.

As the first retainer came up to sign a contract, Riya could feel bile rise up her throat.

By the time the last retainer had signed a contract, Riya noticed blood on her palms caused by her tight grip and long nails. How strange, she didn’t even notice she was hurting herself by her own actions…