Exposition on methodology for the cataloging of the events leading to Ealheim’s Blasphemy.
By Absalom Wren.
Magistrate of The Sacred Circle. Second Hand of Grand Master Theylis Ophram. Beneficed Theologian of the Church of Divine Order.
I am not myself. Not as you've known me. Just as the eternity I entered millennia ago has changed, I am no longer what Transcendency has created me to be. I do not believe I can escape what it is I have become. Not escape, that does not seem right. I should be careful what I say and who I portray myself as in this exposition. I suppose that is what I am trying to relate. In accordance, it would be wise to note my feelings on Ealheim’s blasphemy, before relaying my methods in my research. Since his desecration of The Tabernacle, the violation of stepping foot in the holiest of holies without the permission of The Divine has left its taint in the minds of us all. It had never seemed possible. If anything, because we could not imagine it, it wasn’t. The mar of it has ired the faces of our brethren. Which I now must look upon with a seed of suspicion taking root with every passing glance. I have looked upon the feelings of doubt and violation in their faces and felt mistrust. This veiled paranoia has scarred me with a ruin I cannot come back from. Few of us were righteous before we began our journey in the afterlife. Even if millennia had made us forget that, the memory of it now breathes a new life in the planes of divinity.
What was thought impossible is now possible. I believe this is a good place to begin. The Divine seeing it fit to place Ealheim’s thread of life into The Baptismal Pools, was seen as an act of grace after his annihilation. We could finally witness his movements through the different planes of existence firsthand. After his escape into the Mana Wastes from The Realm of the Profane we had seen mere shadows of his actions. How he was able to survive in the Mana Wastes for so long remains a mystery, but our suspicion that he carried an aura of interference from it was confirmed. Seeing his life first hand allowed us to fill in the gaps and cement the understanding of his influence throughout the centuries. I will not reiterate what we all found. We are all aware. It lives in us now. Feeding the seed of mistrust among us.
After this shift in spirit, I set my sights back on the instigators we had been previously studying in our most recent research. With this newfound knowledge of Ealheim’s influence, it allowed me the opportunity to fill in the gaps of Cyrano and Evie’s present actions. I had offered them my whole attention before Ealheim. It was to be a petition to The Divine to reopen the channels of Transcendence to the Afterworld of Serenity. Therein those who accomplished nothing of any repute in the living world, would again be able to transcend through the hierarchy of the Afterworld. Since Jaimor’s subjugation of it millennia ago, and after his children consumed him and began their chaotic rule, I had repeatedly pleaded with The Divine in my supplication to deal with the treachery. Despite my efforts, The Divine never saw it fit to respond to my supplications. A result, I see now, to be expected. In response to Ealheim’s Blasphemy they have repeated the same castration. All Channels of Transcendence between the Afterworlds of Divine Order are severed. Something I feel needs repeating.
It is the first decree of the Clergy of Divine Order to not concern ourselves with the emotive discourse of the past and present lives we document. These fleeting feelings cannot fathom the eternity that awaits them, and in the end, are tempered away by the steps of transcendence to higher realms of eternity. When I returned to the reflections of Cyrano and Evie's lives, my view of their movements held the knowledge of Ealheim’s intent. The pain of now knowing their naive culpability tore at me. Looking over their lives and the lives of their comrades, their innocence wounded me. Or rather, pressed mercilessly against the wound of Ealheim's blasphemy. For the first time since my bare feet touched the warm earth of this church, I questioned The Divine's intent.
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I must tread carefully now. While I do not intend to stay within the safety of The Divine Realm, I am fully aware of the reach of The Divine’s influence. However, I will not go back and remove what I have stated previously. It is important this seed of doubt be known so you may understand why I have cataloged this research in the manner it is presented. It is not chronological. It is also not removed from the emotive transference that exists in living souls. When I returned to Cyrano and Evie, I allowed myself to be enveloped in their mortal understanding. Or maybe, I was swept under? Truthfully, I am uncertain. What I do know is after allowing myself to be immersed in their mortal lives I felt the touch of time again. A memory burned away millennia ago. Their urgency became my own, and their feeling of loss and triumph reconnected the threads I had long allowed to be severed. I felt shame.
After reliving life through their eyes, I removed myself from the church to a quiet and nearly unused section of the Baptismal Pools. In an act of disobedience, I relived my own life. I ate. I slept. I celebrated and mourned with my tribe. I remembered my name, Ishraq. I saw my children and remembered my love for them. All my successes and failings came back to me. Including the knowledge, I did not know where my children were within the planes of eternity. So, I followed them. I do not know how long I spent in the pools, but several lifetimes passed through me, and I ached with longing for them all once I left. In my mind, scattered in thousands of memories, I felt my family as a part of me again. I forgot Ealheim. Strangely, I did not forget Cyrano and Evie. My theory is the familiarity of their love for each other, as chosen siblings, weaved itself into the pattern of my blood.
I fear by publicly admitting to the cardinal sin of reliving my own life in The Baptismal Pools I have forced my intended exile. Even if I may survive existing within the chaotic ether of the Mana Wastes, I fear I may no longer be welcome on the holy grounds of the church. My reasoning in this act was my own I suppose. Removed from the single goal of the church to document Divine Order within the ever-evolving workings of creation. Despite my inescapable suspicions of my brethren, I have become the one to sever my right as a member of this church. I will enact my own punishment in the hopes that my journey through the unshaped ether of provenance may reveal to me what is left after this willful act of disobedience. As a last act I present to you my findings of the events leading to Ealheim’s desecration of our most sacred realm of eternity. Within them the presence of time and the fragility of a living soul remains intact.
It should be mentioned before I end this final entry that there was an anomaly in my research. While someone managing to stay hidden from the oversight of The Divine is well known during the years Ealheim escaped to the Mana Wastes, a being having the ability to exist wholly outside the will of The Divine has never been known before. How this being has managed to do so and whether it is an act of their own accord I cannot say. It appears as they reached a certain level of being they have managed to remove themselves from the curtain of Divine Omnipresence. What they are and how they came to be I do not know for certain. All I can gather is that if they are possible, there are wonders of creation we have not yet known.