Since there was nothing I could do until my companions returned, I found other ways to keep busy. Mostly by talking to Adam, who unfortunately wasn’t much of a conversationalist. However, they were an exceptional listener. Recounting my experiences was… therapeutic. Just talking and venting my frustration at the unfairness of it all felt good.

I was in the middle of recounting the bandit fight when the entrance to the hideout suddenly opened, making me almost jump out of my skin. Lilith couldn’t hide her smirk as she entered. “Why so jumpy? You only have one assassin guild hunting you.” She shook her head in sadness. “And here I thought that our big bad non-human was made of tougher stuff.”

I was confused by her words. Why would she think I was big or bad? She was only slightly smaller than me, and I certainly wasn’t bad. Then I remembered one of my new abilities. I used Sense State to reveal her amusement and chuckled with her. With a pat on my shoulder, she sank into the other chair and began to study me.

“What?” I asked after it started to get uncomfortable. Lilith sighed. “I can’t figure you out. Everything surrounding you is strange and much of it doesn’t make sense. At that, I shrugged apologetically. “I told you everything I know, but even I can’t piece it all together.”

The assassin frowned at the lack of answers. Her frown quickly turned into a smile as she got an idea. “How about a game?” She asked eagerly. The shift in topic was sudden, but I was still intrigued. I motioned for her to continue.

“It’s simple. We will take turns asking each other questions. If one person doesn’t want to answer a question, another one has to be chosen. Sound good?” That was indeed a simple game, but I considered it. There were some questions I didn’t want to answer but that wasn’t a problem as I could just pass. Besides, there were a slew of things I wanted to ask her.

Lilith clasped her hands together and smiled after I agreed. “Great! Since this is your first time playing you can ask the first question.” There were several things I was curious about so I started with the first one that came to mind. “When I was at the altar of your god there were three different figurines on it. What do they mean?”

This was a question that was very much to Lilith’s liking. “Ah, Noctus, God of Shadows. Did you know that he is also the god of woodcarving? It’s interesting that you ask even if your situation is… let's say special. Most people don’t really care about him and instead flock to one of those golden dicks from the Pantheon of Order. Persa excluded. There aren’t many who take her as their patron.”

I remembered that Persa was the goddess of forgiveness and Pecta’s patron. Maybe he would answer my questions about her later. “Anyway,” Lilith continued. “The three statues represent the forms of Noctus: The Deceiver, The Merchant, and The Unknown. They embody all his major aspects. Now it’s my turn.”

She thought for a second before finding something. “What do you think of Pecta? You told me how you two met, but I would like to know what you think of him.”

The question caught me off guard. ‘What I think of him?’ It was a simple yet difficult question. “Well,” I started. “He was the first person I interacted with after my awakening. At the time, I was desperate for any kind of social connection. Even if he had turned out to be a bad person, I probably would have still enjoyed talking to him. But he wasn’t a bad person.”

I thought about how to properly phrase my thoughts. “He is ruthless. When we attacked the bandit camp, he had no remorse about killing them. He is also very good at hating. If you spend more time with him, be prepared to hear some rants about nobles.”

I paused. “But he is also the most caring person I have ever met. That probably doesn’t mean much considering my lack of social interactions. Still, there have been countless times when he could have abandoned me and he didn’t. Countless times when it would have been easier to just leave me. But he never did. You don’t know this, but I have experienced betrayal before. It wasn’t a nice feeling and I am afraid that it will happen again. But with Pecta I am not afraid of it happening. He has a lot going on, but I know that he won’t betray me.”

It took me a while to compose myself. That had been way more personal than I intended. I just wanted to say that he was a good person, but it had unintentionally spiraled out into this grand speech. Part of that was Lilith’s fault. She was a good listener, almost as good as Adam. Her bandaged face didn’t reveal any emotions, but it felt like she truly understood. She didn’t interrupt, she just listened.

Lilith cleared her throat. Even she hadn’t expected my answer to be this deep. To stop the awkwardness, I hurried us along. “Let’s continue with the game. My turn now. When I met Noctus we were in some kind of jungle. Do you know what that place is? Everything there felt so strange.” Lilith took a moment to think before answering. “I’m a Chosen, but even I don’t know everything. All I know for sure is that it's called the Fallen Forest. That is Noctus' domain, a world completely under his control. I assume all gods have a domain, but can’t confirm it.” She looked slightly uncomfortable. “It is also the place where Chosen of Noctus get tested before receiving his blessing.”

That was interesting. I nodded and motioned for her to continue. It was her turn to ask a question.

“What are your plans? You want to leave Seran, but then what? It doesn't matter if you used to be a human, now you're not, and non-humans aren't welcome in Sanktrum.”

“I…” What did I want to do? Hell, what could I do? I knew so little about the world and yet the few things I did know weren’t pretty. “If you don’t want to answer, that’s fine,” Lilith offered, seeing my discomfort. “I can just ask another-“

“It's fine,” I interrupted. Taking a deep breath, I confessed. “To be honest, I haven’t thought about it. All this time I have just been going with whatever was thrown at me. Do you understand what I mean?”

At Lilith’s earnest nod I continued. “On one hand, I want to explore the world, meet its people, and see interesting things. However, I have almost died several times in a short period of time. Despite life's many shortcomings, I think it's a thousand times better than whatever awaits us after death.” Every time I thought of the darkness from which I had come, shivers overtook me.

“Are there even places where I can live in peace? Without someone hunting me.” Lilith thought about it. “There are places that are more hospitable to non-humans. The Empire accepts them as citizens, though I have heard that there is a lot of discrimination. There is also Zalfanum, a nation almost entirely made up of non-humans.” Lilith cringed. “Now probably isn’t the greatest time to move there. Wouldn’t surprise me if another crusade is about to start.”

I wanted to ask more about this Zalfanum nation but realised that now wasn’t the time. Instead, I continued thinking about my long-term goals. “I don’t like all this fighting and violence. If I had the choice, I would never fight again.” I sighed. “But that's not realistic. It doesn’t matter what I want. In the end, that decision isn’t within my reach.” I shrugged helplessly. It was infuriating but true. Until I solved all my immediate problems, my life wasn’t my own.

Lilith sighed and moved her chair next to mine. She didn’t touch me, but her closeness was still comforting. We just sat there for a while before Lilith broke the silence. “Do you know why I like this game?” She went on before I could answer. “I like it because it gives you a glimpse into the minds of your fellow players. You can learn a lot by just asking simple questions.”

She stared blankly straight ahead, as if lost in thought. I was about to ask her what she meant by that when she suddenly stood up and turned towards me. The determination in her eyes was downright scary.

“Do you want to control your fate?” She demanded. I could only nod at her intensity. Control was something I desperately lacked. “Then you must learn to fight,” she stated. “What? But I don’t like violence,” I complained. Violence was something I could very much do without.

“There will always be people who want to take control of your life,” Lilith retorted, not backing down. “To control your destiny, you need to be able to defend yourself. Fortunately, you have a blessed assassin here who is ready to teach you everything there is to know about kicking and stabbing ass.”

The tale has been illicitly lifted; should you spot it on Amazon, report the violation.

Controlling my destiny… hm. It was certainly an appealing idea. I had no delusions about the fact that learning to fight would magically solve all my problems. After all, how do you fight a demon, let alone a god?

The bandit fight flashed before my eyes. If I'd been stronger, Pecta and I wouldn’t have gotten hurt. And I wouldn’t have been so desperate as to give in to the demon. Knowing how to fight would definitely make my life easier.

I appraised Lilith. She certainly didn’t look like a fighter. All the bandits had been bigger than me and I had still overpowered them. In comparison, she looked like a stick. Maybe she could show me some interesting tricks but I would have to be careful not to hurt her. “I’m in.”

With a gasp, I landed on my ass for what felt like the millionth time. “Again,” the ruthless voice of the assassin called out. With difficulty I managed to get back into a position that vaguely resembled a fighting stance.

“Bend your knees more. You need to be able to react to whatever your opponent throws at you,” Lilith lectured me. I weakly glared at the human, whom I had begun to consider more of a demon than the actual one in my mind.

We had moved all the furniture out of the way before starting the training. ‘Training’ was a very vague word, considering that for roughly two hours Lilith had been beating me up while dropping hints about what I needed to do to not get beat up.

At first, I had been pretty confident, thinking that my superior strength would make this easy. When she said that we wouldn’t be using weapons, my confidence had soared even higher.

It was almost hilarious how wrong I had been. While yes, I was physically stronger than her, that didn't really matter because I couldn’t get my hands on her. Somehow she always avoided all my attacks and managed to get close to deliver a counterattack.

Luckily, or unluckily, I could take a lot more punishment than the average human. When Lilith noticed this, she stopped holding back.

That’s how I found out that Chosen could pack quite a punch. Even when I pitted my strength against Lilith’s, I was only slightly stronger. Gaining a blessing apparently strengthened the body to superhuman levels. What worried me even more was that my opponent was only a Blessed, the weakest of all the Chosen. I couldn’t imagine the strength of a Chosen higher up in the hierarchy. This cemented my opinion of never messing with someone who was chosen by a god.

What I found even more fascinating was how Lilith used her blessing. It was designed for stealth, allowing her to blend into the shadows more easily, but by briefly activating and deactivating it, she was able to disorient me.

Despite all this, I wasn’t getting frustrated. The fight didn’t feel unfair like the sandworm attack, but rather like a puzzle that was just waiting for me to figure it out. And I was getting closer. With a nod, I motioned for her to begin.

She began by circling me, a risky move in such a tight space. It was very tempting to lunge at her, but I resisted. I had learned the hard way that this left me wide open for a counterattack.

Instead of making the first move, I stayed calm and watched her movement. Lilith tried to scare me with a couple of faints but I refused to fall for them. Then she added her blessing to the mix. Whenever she activated it, my gaze became unfocused and it became harder to keep track of her.

But I had grown accustomed to her fighting style. I had found that by concentrating, I could see small wisps of energy emanating from her whenever she used it. After consulting with Adam, I concluded that this was divine essence.

But how was I able to sense it? When I asked Lilith she just stared at me. To her knowledge, only very skilled Chosen could sense divine essence. She had theorised that my meeting with Noctus could have something to do with it. Another answer might be the influence of the demon, but I didn’t mention that.

I almost missed the moment Lilith went on the attack. After using her blessing, she ducked forward and tried to kick me in the side. I barely managed to dodge and went to grab her, but she spun away before I got a hold on her. Not wanting to waste my momentum, I tried to hit my opponent with my human hand, while being ready to defend with my claw.

What I hadn’t expected was for her to grab my hand and use my movement to throw me over her shoulder. I landed on my back with a grunt, bracing for the impending blow that never came. Instead Lilith moved aside and offered me her hand. With a grateful nod, I took it and got to my feet. That had been intense.

Slow clapping resounded from the entrance as Pecta entered the hideout. “That was impressive, Vindict. When we fought in the desert, you only used brute force, but this had style to it.” It was rare for Pecta to offer compliments and I could feel a seed of satisfaction blooming in my chest.

Lilith just grinned and stretched her arms. “Aw, where is my compliment? I think I did pretty good.” I frowned and nodded. She definitely deserved praise. At Pecta’s huff, I grew confused and used Sense State on both of my companions. It revealed Pecta’s annoyance and Lilith’s mirth.

Lilith chuckled. “Don’t worry, I know I’m great. Anyway, interested in gaining some hands-on experience?” She cracked her neck. “I’m feeling gracious after this warm-up.”

Pecta shook his head. Even though he was still annoyed, I could see a small smile on his face. “I’m not looking to meet an early grave.” The smile vanished and he became serious again. “We need to talk about our next move.”

We moved the furniture back into place and formed a circle, so that Pecta could relay his discovery. When he came to the wanted poster, I gasped. Even Lilith looked surprised. “That can’t be,” she muttered. “Why would someone hire an assassin guild and somehow get the city guard on your tail?” Pecta shrugged. “Whoever it is, they definitely are a noble or have a connection to a noble. The bounties were by noble decree.”

We all thought about this before Pecta piped back in. “What I find strange is that the bounty wasn’t for someone named Vindict. Sure, it was you on the picture, but the name of the person was listed as ‘Sarvad’. Any idea why?”

I nodded. This only further confirmed the fact that the horned woman was searching for me. “I think Sarvad was my former name. Before they experimented on me and I lost my memories.”

After this, the conversation stalled as we all stewed on our thoughts. Leaving Seran had just become much more difficult. Our only hope had been the caravans but that was a no-go. Security would be too strict to join one unnoticed. Well, at least for me.

“From what you said Pecta, it would be basically impossible to match you to your wanted poster, right?” I waited for his confirmation before starting to say something that I really hoped I wouldn’t regret. “Has it ever crossed your mind that you can just… leave? Nothing is tying you to me, and by helping me you are just risking your life. I won’t hold it against you if you decide that you have had enough. You have already helped me enough to clear up any imaginary debt owed to me.”

I avoided his eyes. Despite what I had just said, I wanted him to stay. Not just because he was extremely helpful. His company felt… good. I enjoyed being with him and didn’t want it to end. But not saying the obvious felt selfish, especially now that things were getting more dangerous and he had no incentive to stick around.

I glanced at Pecta and he seemed to be deep in thought. “It would be a lie if I said I had never thought about leaving. Turning my back on a path filled with danger sounds very tempting,” he stated. My hope plummeted, but he continued. “But then I thought about what I would be returning to. My life before meeting you wasn’t horrible. Not good, but I got by doing various guard jobs. There wasn’t anything else I could do, considering that my only skill is fighting. Of course, many people would welcome any fighter with open arms. However, those jobs are often on the more unsavoury side of the law and morality in general.”

Those words weren’t meant specifically for Lilith but there was a connection nonetheless. She didn’t interrupt, although Sense State told me that she wasn’t too thrilled. “The army wasn’t a place I wanted to go either. Too much death for me.” He chuckled darkly. “Despite what you saw in the desert, Vindict, I am very much against violence. Already seen too much of it. Being a guard was the only real job that required me to be able to fight, but with a low chance of it happening. Guards do most of their work by simply being intimidating.

Pecta paused to consider what he was going to say next. “My life was… dull. I lived from one day to the next with no real goal to achieve. I am a follower of Persa, but I wasn’t doing anything to justify it. But since I met you, this has changed. I feel like I am finally doing something good by helping someone. And frankly, I enjoy your company.”

I didn’t know how to express my overwhelming gratitude to Pecta. My vision was becoming blurry and I wiped away some strange liquid coming from my eyes. “Thank you.”

Lilith slowly began to clap. “That was incredibly sweet. Almost brought me to tears.” She wiped at her eyes, though I could see that they were dry.

Pecta glared at her. “I know you're a ruthless, fanatical killer, but could you just shut up for one moment?” Lilith raised her eyebrow in mock offence. “I disagree with two of the three statements. I mean, have you seen some of the priests from the Creator’s Church? Complete whack jobs, I tell you.”

It was fascinating how their personalities changed when they were in the same room together. Despite only knowing each other for a day, it was obvious that there was no love lost between them. I didn’t even need Sense State to figure that out, even if I didn’t know the reason. And frankly, it currently wasn’t that important. I clapped my hands together, interrupting their senseless bickering.

Clapping was such an all-purpose gesture that humans used and I was glad that I could do it as well, despite the distinctly different sound. “We need to come up with a plan,” I stated. Both of them reluctantly nodded, so we got to planning.

Unfortunately, the plan that we ended up with was rather lacklustre. It was too risky for me to step outside, so I would stay hidden for the foreseeable future. Pecta would be responsible for getting food and other accommodations with the money we had ‘liberated’ from the bandits. Lilith, on the other hand, would be our spy, informing us of the progress of the Desert Vipers and any other new developments that might occur. We hoped that security would slowly relax, making it possible for us to sneak out with a caravan.

I had asked Lilith if she would join us when that happened, but she had declined. Prying was very tempting but I restrained myself. Her reasons were her own, and I had learned enough through conversation with Pecta that humans often didn’t want to talk about ‘private’ matters. For now, I could only sit back and wait for things to change.