“Really? I mean...you’re not fucking with me?” Brian could help but ask. The implications would...confirm what he already suspected, but didn’t have the nerve to ask. The bathroom didn’t have mirrors for him to see his new bald self, but it did strike him odd that he was surrounded by, basically, skinny kids in their early twenties.
“Hahaha-no, I really just turned 74,” Andy said with a laugh as he inspected the paintings. “Whatever they did to my body, it made me a helluva lot more spry than I've been in years. Gotta say though, you’re really strong, even if our bodies are like this.”
“Not for long,” Brian gritted. Andy was standing on Brian’s shoulders barefoot on account of being shorter, though he was mostly leaning against the wall while Brian made sure he didn’t fall.
“Alright, I’m done,” Andy said. Brian moved forward and allowed Andy to slide down behind him. “Thanks.”
“No problem; find anything?”
“Besides the fact that they're just printed copied and not actual paintings, not much,” Andy answered as he put on his slippers.
“...I hate this company already,” Brian said as he turned around and leaned on the wall. “They have decent bathrooms and what I can only assume is magic, did shit to our body to make us like this, but then do weird and cheap shit like peanuts and printed paintings. I mean, aren’t like a third of people allergic to crackers or around abouts?” He asked, “Err-peanuts I mean,” he amended.
“It’s contradictory,” Andy nodded as he leaned on the wall beside Brian and crossed his arms. “They flex enough to prove they can do more than talk, but skimp on small stuff. It might not even matter to the company considering our position...or is it on purpose?”
They both paused to think about it.
“Motivation maybe?” Brian asked with a shrug. “I mean, the peanuts alone is enough for me to leave and see if he can find a slice of pizza somewhere.”
“Maybe,” Andy shrugged. “I’ve done underhanded job interviews before. You know, let the kids sweat for an hour and then chuck a problem at them, see if they sink or swim. Nothing on this level though. Still, if there really is a way to leave, then that ought to mean that they left hints or clues for anyone to find...unless....”
Brian didn’t like how Andy trailed off like that.
“Unless what?”
“Unless...only a finite amount of people can leave this way, meaning a finite amount of clues. The worst-case scenario would be that that the limit has already been reached.”
They were both silent after that.
VA-RMMMMM
Both men snapped their heads at the direction the sound echoed from.
"From the right," Brian said.
"Eyup."
"Any chance we can still leave this way because people keep coming in?"
"Personally?" Andy began, "I would not put my faith in that. Still, hope is better than no hope."
Brian didn't say anything. Both he and Andy had to exit through different rooms. Meaning one of them was for sure going into the bad room. If it exists.
"What would really help is finding a clue. At the very least it would be something to do," Andy said.
Brian nodded at that. Having something like this to focus on has already done wonders for his mental health, mainly that he's not close to having a panic attack anymore. But Andy has probably been at this for hours.
“Any ideas where to start?”
“Somewhere I haven’t,” Andy offered. “I’ve tried everything I could think of,” Andy continued while slightly shaking his head. “Tables, chairs, even tried to get a turn on those games. Heck, I even tried to find someone who could understand morse code.”
“Morse code? You mean that dot-dash thing?” Brian asked, faintly recalling how it works.
“Yeah. There’s no reason for the hallways to be flickering like that, had to be on purpose,” Andy pointed out, to which Brian nodded while resisting the urge to kick himself for not jumping to that conclusion.
“Didn’t find anyone?” Brian asked.
“Eh, I did indirectly,” Andy replied, “the good thing about this whole...‘Silence Bubble’ thing, is that it makes it easy to creep up on people. These two girls caught on early, twins I think, and they were trying to be stealthy. One girl counted the lights flickering before telling the other girl who wrote it out. I caught sight of it while they were distracted, it was just nonsense.”
“Oh, like what?”
“Literally nonsense. Letters in different orders. I grabbed a sheet myself and tried to see if I could arrange them differently, nothing. I thought afterwards that maybe they found out what I was doing, but they are still there,” he pointed to the right.
“Have you tried working with them?”
“Wouldn’t even talk to me,” Andy said with a sigh. “Or anyone else for that matter.”
“Makes sense,” Brian said. “So you’re tapped out then?”
“I’m tapped out,” Andy admitted, “how about you?”
“I, I honestly don’t even know where to start. Especially at something you haven’t,” Brian replied honestly, “but, I think I know someone who does.”
----------------------------------------
“Wow, so, yer really gettin’ alotta mileage outta this,” Zed said in surprise.
“I guess,” Andy said with a light chuckle and a shrug.
“Still though, different realities, why didn’t I think of that,” Zed said while shaking his head.
“Not exactly the first thing that comes to mind,” Brian said nonchalantly, trying really hard to not let the two know that he was a little more than surprised by that fact.
"Yeah, but that's the job, right?" Zed said. "Colonizing a new world in a different reality or some shit?"
...how did I forget that part? Brian couldn't help but wonder.
"Well yeah, if you trust they're telling the complete truth," Brian said, "and, let's be honest, isn't the fact that were dead more concerning?"
"Eh. True enough."
"Mortality has always been an issue," Andy added in.
"Ey, so, you guys think there’s a reality where Arnold Thrump won the American election? Um, a Billionaire, has a weird tan and hair,” Zed asked with a small smile.
"Oh that guy, I don't think he ran in our reality," Brian replied.
“He tried," Andy corrected, "but hey, anything's possible at this point, right?” Andy said as Brian just shrugged while Zed laughed.
“So why are we here?” Brian asked as the trio stood in front of a trash shoot. The thing wasn’t a container, it looked like a container but it wasn’t. It was literally a hole down to a dark bottomless abyss, and considering everything Brian has seen, it might literally be an abyss. The hole was just slightly bigger than Brian’s hand.
“Well, ya said you tried everything right, even this?” Zed asked with a smile as he tapped the shoot.
“Yup,” Andy said, “I even put my hand inside and found what I thought was brail, but really it’s just a bunch of bumps.”
“Alright, alright, just check this out,” Zed said as he put his hand inside and began to feel around. “Five,” he said as he pulled his hand out, “five bumps. Alright, your turn,” he told Brian.
Stolen from its original source, this story is not meant to be on Amazon; report any sightings.
“My turn what?” Brian asked.
“To feel the bumps.”
“But you just said: five.”
Zed just smiled and nodded at the shoot. Brian sighed but put his hand in, he felt around the edge. His face scrunched. He felt the bumps, they were the same number as he moved his hand around the lid.
“Well,” Zed asked with a toothy smile, “how many bumps?”
“Three,” Brian said as he pulled his hands, “um, six sets of three,” he added.
“Oh shet, didn’t think to watch that,” Zed said in surprise, “nice job!” Brian didn’t say anything, he just nodded and accepted the compliment.
"Thanks, um, how'd you know about this?"
"I didn't. I talked to a lot of people who tried a variety of stuff, either wanting to escape or just bored. Shoulda seen the girl trying to crack open a trash shoot," he laughed. "Any-anyway, a few that I talked to did this and each time I got told a different number."
“Huh,” Andy let out with a nod, “I think I’m getting a better picture now.” Andy put his hand in and felt around. “Three sets of five,” he said.
Zed quickly did the same.
“Same, three sets of five,” Zed said. “Um, you and Brian are from the same earth, er, reality, or whatever, right? Whats different?”
“Lester,” Brian said with a tight smile, “Lester was the guy who interviewed me.”
“Oh, in that case, I got Mariam,” Zed said, he looked at Andy, “that mean-” Andy shook his head.
“Theodore was the one who interviewed me,” Andy quickly cut him off.
“Huh,” Zed let out. “Well, there’s goes that thought.”
“Could be a coincidence,” Brian offered.
“Maybe,” Andy said, “let's try another one.”
They moved to a different trash shoot and repeated the process. Andy and Zed got the same amount of bumps while Brian counted a different amount.
“Okay, this is fucking with me,” Brian said.
“You ‘n me, both,” Zed said with a snort.
“Hm,” Andy said with a nod. “Hey Zed, do you recall seeing a picture or painting before being interviewed?”
“Ah...Um...actually, yeah-some sorta underwater thing. I think I saw it in the washroom too.”
“Well that idea’s out,” Brian said as Andy nodded, “I saw one with a dragon. Andy said he saw the unicorn with two horns,” Brian jerked a thumb in the general direction of the bathroom.
“Pretty sure it’s not ah unicorn then,” Zed pointed out.
“Twoniecorn then, I dunno and I’m not really sure I care to be honest,” Brian said.
“I don’t think anyone does,” Andy said.
“Eh,” Zed shrugged, he looked around and stopped when he spotted something. “Oh! I got an idea, be right back!”
Zed quickly walked off to a nearby table and talked with someone who was drawing something on the table. Brian and Andy shared a glance before looking back at Zed. The more people they brought in the bigger the risk that either of them would not be able to leave. Brian didn’t want to be that kind of person, or even think that way, but this wasn't exactly an average situation.
Zed quickly came back with another bald person. White skin and soft features and dressed as they all were.
“Hey guys,” Zed said while holding the girl from her shoulders, “meet Alex. Alex had Leonard as the interviewer.”
“Um, hi,” Alex said with a clearly feminine voice while giving an awkward wave. “Alex Falls.”
“Hey, I’m Brian Sosa,” Brian introduced himself with a lazy wave.
“I’m Andrew but I prefer Andy,” Andy introduced himself while putting his hand out, “pleased to meet you, Ms. Falls.”
“Um,” Alex let out with a small tight smile but accepted the hand, “same.”
“Well alright, let’s get this show going,” Zed said while clapping his hands. Alex walked up to the trash shoot, looked at it for a moment before reaching inside and feeling around for a moment.
“Seven, um, just one set of seven," Alex said.
“Same as me then,” Brian said. “How many people doing the interview are there?”
“I counted four from the people I talked with,” Andy replied.
“Same,” Zed said.
“Yeah. Lester, Mariam, Theodore, and Leonard,” Alex supplied, “those are the only names I heard.”
Brian couldn’t help but note that everyone in their group aside from himself was pretty well informed.
“So...what,” Brian began, “people with Lester and the other guy get the same numbers while the people who got the other two get a different set?”
“Looks like it,” Andy said as Zed and Alex agreed.
“So...what now?” Alex asked.
“Split up?” Zed suggested.
“I don’t see why not,” Andy said, “Brian and I can head to the other room and collect the numbers from there and-”
“And the two of us,” Zed motioned Alex, “can get the ones here. Yes! I like that!”
After a brief discussion about the plan, Zed and Alex continued to search the trash shoots in The Left Room while Brian and Andy went to collect the numbers from The Right Room.
----------------------------------------
“Hey so,” Brian began as two made their way back to The Left Room. Aside from Andy laughing at his mistake, turns out the two trash shoots he investigated had the same set of numbers, it was pretty uneventful. Meaning Brian had enough time to think. “You said you had a better idea of what’s going on, right? Mind filling me in?”
“Hm?” Andy let out as he glanced at Brian.
“I mean,” Brian paused to gather his thoughts, “I get that they want people who can think, people who pay attention and find information.” It wasn’t a tough conclusion to come to, 3/4s of their little group knew the names of the interviewers, Brian hadn’t even thought to look for that. “But, I’m just not sure what they want. I mean, isn’t there a better way to find all that out?”
“Well...” Andy began, “truth be told, I’m just as in the dark as you are. All I have are guesses that are a bit of a stretch.”
“Yeah, I hear you, but, you sound like you have better guesses than I do.”
Andy glanced at him again, then stopped walking before turning around to face him. He rubbed his chin, he paused when he did touch his chin before he continued feeling it. Brian reasoned Andy probably had a beard, like himself, but was still surprised to find smooth skin.
Andy took a deep breath in.
“This is just a guess,” Andy began, “don’t take what I say to heart too much,” Brian nodded. “I think you were on the right track earlier about motivation, but that's only a piece of the picture. Aside from doctors and scientist, this company needs muscle. Us, right?”
“Right,” Brian nodded. Someone had to do all the boring and/or heavy work.
“But we’re all like this,” he motioned his body, “all of us. Bald, thin, rejuvenated or some other magical humbug. At this point, everyone here is on equal footing, there’s no way to tell who’s good muscle. Put yourself in their shoes. If you needed to hire people from this bunch, how would you go about doing it?”
“I, I would,” Brian hesitated for a bit, “I dunno, a contest maybe? See who’s got the drive to diesel up into shape, can follow orders, maybe see who gives attitude. Not this...‘escape the puzzle room’ crap we’re doing.”
“And yet here we are."
"Meaning I'm off target."
"No, you're on target. You just have to remember what the business is."
"Colonizing?"
"Yeah, think about it. We are being recruited to colonize…something. If you look at history, colonizing isn't a fast or easy process. Drive, motivation,” Andy said while bringing up his hand for emphasis, "that's only a piece of what you need from workers. What else about your workers would you need to know before you ship them out for this long and difficult project?"
“...Can they work together,” Brian said in realization.
Andy clapped his hands loudly.
“Exactly! Sure a smart individual who knows morse code is cool, but it takes more than a single person to physically build a city.”
“So...Initiative and cooperation,” Brian said, “Um the motivation comes from, well, we don’t want to be here, and we need to work together to actually get out.”
“It’s my guess,” Andy said with a smile before turning around and walking, Brian following behind. “Again, it’s a stretch but it seems reasonable. Even in a regular job you need to work and communicate with other people, especially in a team setting.”
Brian nodded at the logic. He would have said more but they ran into Zed and Alex in the bathroom. The two were by the water dispenser staring, Brian assumed, at the wall with the pictures.
Zed gave a wave as the two approached while Alex leaned on the wall close to the water dispensers, Arms crossed and smirking. Alex glanced at them and gave them a nod before looking at the wall again.
“Man there are some horny fuckers here,” Zed commented.
“Oh yeah,” Andy laughed.
“Should have seen the threeway I walked through earlier,” Brian said.
Zed snorted before he pointed at the direction of the wall.
Both Andy and Brian turned to look only to find a small group of people having sex. He couldn’t get an accurate count because of the urinals in the middle of the bathroom, but he counted at least seven bald people getting freaky.
“Oh, you meant literally,” Brian said before looking away with a small smile, “yeah...that, that tops the threeway I saw.”
“Huh,” Andy said with a small smile and a nod as he stared at the spectacle. “No invite?” He directed at Zed.
“Ey,” Zed put his hands up while shaking his head, smiling as he did so, “I like good bed company, but it does require a bed.”
“Fair enough,” Andy laughed before he looked at Alex, prompting the question without asking. Alex laughed with a blush but shook her head.
“Bald is not my type and I’m more for privacy and comfort. This is far from that,” she gestured at the spectacle in front of them.
“Also fair,” Brian said. “So you guys got the numbers?”
“Yep, Alex has it,” Zed said as the group quickly got down to business. Andy brought out the list and placed it on a dry spot on the counter beneath the water dispensers and the one in Alex’s hand quickly joined it.
“Alright these numbers here,” Andy said as he pointed at a set, “are the ones from the longest wall, the shortlist here are from the shortest wall. This one here, it’s the wall with entry to the hallway. We labelled it just in case it mattered and in what order we got them in. No point making multiple trips.”
“Nuh, I feel you,” Zed said.
“We actually did the same,” Alex said as she pointed at the labels they used.
“We found a few repeating sets of numbers,” Brian pointed.
“Same here,” Zed said.
“Okay,” Andy said as he nodded.
“Alright,” Brian mimicked the motion.
“Mhmm,” Zed let out while also nodding.
“Okie-Dokes,” Alex joined in with a nod while studying the numbers. “Well...now what?”
“I don’t know,” Andy replied with a tight smile.