It's the day before Christmas day.

I'm just inside my room all this time. Mom was cooking for the Noche Buena. She does not want it when somebody else is in the kitchen if she is cooking. Maybe later I'll help her, or if not, I'll cook my special dish to serve for dinner after she finishes.

At this moment, I am preparing the big round table in the garden, and I had already cooked my specialty, which is Beef Caldereta, but it is still simmering. I let it cook for more couple of minutes. I'm setting up outside because Ley's Family would join us on this year's Christmas Eve. As I remember things, it's more than three years since I moved in here, and I befriend Ley. I was born here in the city, for the record, but I was raised in the province by my grandparents, my Mom's parents since they need to work. My parents settled here after their marriage, and they only became close to Ley's parents as we become best friends.

"Hey! Zig," Ley greeted me as he carries a ceramic tray with lasagna, which I can smell even from afar based on its redolent, tasty fragrance.

I smiled, "Can I leave you here for a while? Can I trust you to finish the other things? Got to go inside to check the Caldereta that I'm cooking," I explained to him.

He nodded, put the tray on the lazy susan of the table, and he started placing the pork and spoons; while I rushed to the kitchen. I took a spoon and scooped some of the red-orangey sauce to have a test taste, and I think it is ready to go. I switched off the stove and started ladling my Caldereta on a beautiful, large, deep bowl, and head out to place it on the table.

"Ley, go pick up Tito, Tita, and Lira. The food would be ready by the time you get here," I told him.

He went home to escort them to the house. Oh, you are wondering who Lira is? She is Ley's younger sister, and they have a two-year gap. We aren't talking that much as we are both kinds of timid-type of person, but I think we're good.

Mom is bringing out the dishes she cooked for tonight's dinner. She made a very creamy carbonara, crispy roasted chicken, and delicious potato salad. Ley's family is already here, and aside from the lasagna, they also brought chicken adobo and a fruit salad.

Mom and Tita Teresa greet each other with beso so as Mom to Ley and Lira and Tita Teresa to me. We all sat down, circling the table. The place becomes quiet, and all you can hear is the prayer of my Mom, as we offer our gratitude for this special occasion and little celebration that we all come together.

This tale has been unlawfully lifted from Royal Road; report any instances of this story if found elsewhere.

The arrangement we had was Mom is beside Dad, and next to him is Tito Ludwig, then Tita Teresa, Lira, Ley, and me beside my Mom. We started eating, and all of us are having a good time. But as the conservation continues during the meal, I feel annoyed at what my mother is blabbering.

"Ziggy, why don't you be like Ley. Good at academe and also at sports and not wasting his time being in an enclosed room the whole day," Mom said while praising Ley.

"Thanks! Tita Dreil. Zigs the top of the class, and he got your skills in cooking," Ley said.

"He shouldn't focus on things like cooking. It's a girl thing, and he is not a girl." invalidating Ley's compliments,

"Ziggy just look at Ley. He is such a fine young man and very handsome. A lot of girls seem to be going crazy for him. You should think about having a girlfriend by now," now she said it, and I'm over with this kind of conversation.

"If you would excuse me," I said with a smile, but I'm pissed off, so I leave the table.

"Cooking is a life skill, Dreil. And it's a good thing that you should be proud of." Tita Teresa said, defending me, which I heard as I'm not that yet far from them.

She knows my gender identity and that I'm gay, yet she's always like that, still insisting on the things I do not want. It's fine with me that she keeps on comparing me with Ley because he is far more capable of me, and I know that. However, she crossed the line when she's trying to instill that I should be attracted to a girl. This situation happens all the time. It keeps on reminding me and makes me feel that my existence as a gay person is truly unaccepted and only tolerated by the people who should be the first person to do so.

I am mad and angry at them, but I can't be for a long time because they are still my parents, and all I can do is work very hard to earn their approval, to prove to them there's no need for me to force myself to be someone I am not and let them understand and accept me. My dad never talks to me about it. He was never angry about it, nor he told me that he acknowledge me, but he kept silent, and I have no idea what's on his mind. While Mom pretends that she's okay with it and yeah, she vocally said it, but her actions contradict it, as every day she made me feel I'm defective and there's something wrong with me.

I did not bother to go back there. I go to sleep crying.

The following morning, it's Christmas day. I feel more okay now, and Ley is here. We are in the living room, he brought me a gift, and it was a bracelet.

"We're matching," he said as he shows off the bracelet on his wrist.

"Oh! Thank you for this friendship bracelet," I happily said and felt sorry afterward, "but I don't have anything for you."

"Don't worry about it. As long as your happy, I'm okay with that." He said and gave me a sweet smile.

"Ziggy de Leon!" someone shouts outside, "delivery for Ziggy de Leon," I rushed to the gate as I heard that it was a delivery meant for me, but I did not order anything online. Who would have sent it?

"Ziggy de Leon, sir?" he asked, and I nodded. I signed something and received a kind of a large box.

Ley helped me carry the box. It is big, but it's not that heavy though. I opened the box, and there's a big blue teddy bear inside. There's no name in the box, and there's no one in my mind that I could think of giving me such a present, but there's a card as I lift the teddy.

I read it, and it says:

Merry Christmas, Zig. I hope you like it.

~Mockingbird