“GOOF MURNIN NEEK!”
Nick’s drowsiness lifted immediately. She spun around, clutching a toothbrush in front of her. “In—Intruder! Where a-are you?” she stuttered.
“Not intoodre!”
Nick turned around, her oily hair slapping her face. “Exflipper!” she exclaimed, “What’s wrong with your voice?”
“Puh-lite!” Exflibberaguil demanded pointedly.
“What?”
“Not ever mind,” Exflibberaguil sighed, “Tranzlater got an-gree. Sulking now. I don’t good Nedriew.”
The only thing that sounded normal in Exflibberaguil’s sentence was Nedriew. But then again, Nedriew was an alien word, after all.
Exflibberaguil’s normal voice sounded very much like what you’d think a strangled seal would sound like. Key word would. In reality, normal strangled seals don’t talk.
Exflibberaguil’s voice cracked and squeaked at the oddest of moments, and though the words were recognizable, each word sounded wrong. The emphasis was in the wrong places. Most of his words sounded like they required a question mark at the end. And he was loud as well.
“Did you fight with your translator? Is that why it isn’t translating for you?” Nick clarified.
Exflibberaguil nodded. It obviously strained him to talk in English.
“Well then,” Nick said, “can you understand me?”
“Not good. Hard.”
Nick sighed. “Well, I guess we can’t continue with the trigger words. We only got half of ‘A’ yesterday. At this rate, it’ll take a year for you to remember anything. Plus I can’t understand half of what you’re saying.”
“Box…Box tranzlate.”
“You’re right!” Nick started, “Box can translate! But that means we have to find somewhere to park. We can’t be feeding this parking meter forever. And I don’t trust Box enough to ensure my safety when it multi-taskes.”
“Park,” Exflibberaguil repeated.
“Yes, park. But—”
“No!” Exflibberaguil groaned with frustration, “Park at park! Cam-p!”
“Park at…?”
“Park!” Exflibberaguil yelled, waving furiously at the window.
In front was a large wooden arrow-shaped sign with white, blocky letters painted on. Written on it was “PLAYING! CAMPING! FUN! A PARK TO BE IN WHEN YOU HAVE NOTHING BETTER TO DO!”
“Oh! You mean we park at the park, and pretend to be campers!”
Exflibberaguil nodded, his now-greasy red hair shaking with his head.
I never realized it, Nick reflected, but we really are different. Exflibberaguil needs his translator and Box simply just to communicate with me.
After their trailer was secured a good distance into the forest, Exflibberaguil began unplugging Box from the many wires attached to it. Nick had insisted Box severed all connections to the car, in case Box would accidently activate the car and explode the vehicle.
Enjoying this book? Seek out the original to ensure the author gets credit.
“Hello! I am Box! It’s so nice to see you again!” Box said cheerfully.
“Box, can you please be a translator for us?” Nick asked politely. It was refreshing to hear the cheerful Australian accent.
“I’m so happy to be of service!” Box bubbled joyfully. “I’ll love to be your translator! What are the languages?”
“English and…well…whatever your language is, Exflipper.”
“Mustache.”
“Mustache?” Nick repeated, “You have to be kidding me.”
“Not keed-ing.”
“Ok! The translator is now set up! I will begin translating now!” Box beeped.
Exflibberaguil sighed a breath of relief. Nick could see that speaking in a different language had tired him out considerable, not to mention that he had been awake all night.
He was the first to speak.
Speaking, however, would not be the correct verb to describe him. He sang. And it was not words that he spoke. It was music. Smooth, classical music that are played in elevators and telephones because they go on forever without stopping.
Of course, after listening to Exflibberaguil a little more closely, Nick was able to differentiate certain phrases and groups of short melodies that she could only assume were words. No wonder why his voice kept on changing pitches so dramatically, Nick realized, his language requires him to.
His language requires him to.
“Exflibberaguil says,” Box began, “ ‘I will stand guard and watch over the trailer. Nick, you go and buy some food. I’m sure you’re hungry by now. You humans always get hungry so easily. It’s annoying. And buy something healthier this time. None of that non-rabbit-repelling snacks.’ “
It felt so odd to hear the word ‘humans’. Exflibberaguil always said Sodriew. But of course, how could Box know?
“Um,” Nick spoke, “Box, can you not translate this?”
Box paused, making sure Nick had nothing else to say, before turning to Exflibberaguil and relaying the message.
“No! Box! This is an order!”
Poor Box spun in circles, unsure whether or not to translate. “I…I…I…” it glitched.
“Box! Instead of telling English trigger words, you should have been saying Mustachela words! I’ve been so stupid all along! How long with it take to got through all the words?”
“Only a few centuries.”
“Ah, nevermind,” Nick muttered, thinking hard.
“Box…” Exflibberaguil croaked in his broken voice, “no…include…words…sayed…beefore…”
“Excuse me?” Box asked politely.
“That’s genius, Exflibberaguil!” Nick blurted, “Box! Don’t include words that Exflibberaguil has said before! Or any words that you’ve said before!”
“That will cut it down to only half a century.”
Nick sighed. “Oh well. Better start now, I guess.”
Exflibberaguil sang something. Box said, “Exflibberaguil says ‘go buy something to eat.’”
“Oh, that’s right!” Nick exclaimed, “I’ll also need to buy clothes and shampoo. I’ll be out for a while then. Box, do you have money?” Nick still felt a pang of guilt for using the counterfeit money.
“Yes. It’s in the safe.”
“Thank you, Box. Please begin saying the words.”
Nick left the trailer.
----------------------------------------
NICK WAS WALKING BACK.
She had several large shopping bags in her hand. Exflibberaguil would not be happy with her food choice, but she just couldn’t resist the heavenly smell of croissants and macarons. Nick had gotten Exflibberaguil a salad. Salads were brightly colored, and Exflibberaguil seemed to enjoy anything that was bright.
As she neared the little clearing in the woods where they had parked the trailer, she could feel the sense of wrongness. Once again, the pressure on her head and shoulders started, as well as her reoccurring headache.
“Exflipper?” she called out cautiously.
Something rustled behind her. Instinctively, she dropped the bags and picked up the closest stick she could find. Everything put her on edge.
But the bush parted. It was only the white ferret.
Nick sighed. “Ferret, have you seen Exflibberaguil?” she asked in a sing-song voice.
The ferret looked at her stupidly.
“Of course, I wasn’t expecting you to reply,” she said to herself, “Exflibberaguil would be in the trailer you big idiot.” She picked up the bags and walked heavily to the trailer. For some reason, she took another deep breath, as if she were about to walk onto a stage. She reached for the doorknob.
“Neek…”
Nick jumped, swinging the stick and nearly hitting the target. She was about to apologize, when her eyes fell on Exflibberaguil.
His eyes were red and bloodshot, but for some reason, it did not look like he had been crying. His nose twitched slightly. He kept on gnashing his teeth and biting his tongue.
“I…reemeembeer…” he whispered.