While I headed towards my newly rented shop, I changed my mind. I turned towards Misty's to scope out if Vik had time for a check up, but I really wanted a chat with Misty. I had a feeling I needed someone like her right then. All of my emotions were burnt out, and even the mana flowing through me was stilted.

Misty's Emporium was calm and sadly empty. A condition that I had to think was somewhat intentional on Misty's part. The very air of her shop guided the skeptical folks away. Was it her own mana working to keep her environment peaceful?

Now say what you will about "spiritual" types, Misty zeroed in on the pain I was feeling quickly. I had barely walked in, when she took one glance at me and started shaking her head. I didn't have to say anything and she just pointed at that wonderfully comfy chair. Hopping into that soft embrace was a relief. I have to get one of these chairs.

She put some music on, and a soothing melody filled the shop. I let it massage my ears. Misty reached over and closed my eyes. It felt wonderful to no longer see the world, and to let myself drift on the peaceful sounds. I'll be honest, I don't think I would have voluntarily closed my eyes on my own. I was still in a wired state, and much to raw to pull myself out of it.

Soon a gentle scent wafted from incense, perhaps jasmine or honeysuckle I was never very good at telling those two scents apart. It used to drive my mother crazy. She'd loved plants and I often helped her with gardening growing up, but I'd never seemed to have the knack for it that she did. She had honeysuckle growing across one trellis and jasmine vining over another, and for the life of me, I couldn't tell the difference unless they were blooming. It was only from the shape and color of the flowers that I could make a solid identification. Strange, I hadn't thought very often about my family, since coming here. I'd gotten too caught up in all of the craziness here. The magic present in this world both real and metaphorical had captivated me.

I hoped they were doing well, because I had a feeling that I'd never find a way back. Not sure I'd even want to if I could. For all the pain, and all the terror I simply felt more alive here. Like I mattered even if only a little, or rather, my supposed purpose mattered. Being lost in my own thoughts had almost masked a feeling of being suspended in a pool of water. Drifting along and flowing around any trouble.

Misty finally started talking. "So what has you so knotted up? You reek of horror." My starting to relax brain actually shaped a Cleanse on myself, it was embarrassing to my to smell. The spell had form without any real effort on my part. It took it a minute for my mind to fully catch up to the question. "So you are like Ciri. I had wondered." Misty snarked when my eyes snapped open in momentary panic. She chuckled, "Don't worry, I'm not going to tell anyone." She placed her hand on my forehead, and gently forced my eyes closed again. I decided to trust her and went with it. Trying to get back to that floating feeling.

She was doing all kind of things, some were with those crystals I'd seen before, and then with other things I hadn't seen. She was softly chattering on about Chakras and how opening them up could aid with the processing of emotions. Most of it sounded like hooey to me, but hey, I was really relaxed so I wasn't going to say or do anything that might interfere with this pleasant feeling. I wasn't quite asleep, but I wasn't awake either.

"So I'd like you to talk about what has you all messed up. That will begin the process to let it all out and then let it all go." Her voice was as compelling as a TV Evangelist, without the fire and brimstone edge. No clue what she meant by it, but I listened anyway. Haltingly, I gave her an edited rundown of my time in these lands of darkness. I cut out most of the recent events with the Aldecaldos because I didn't want her involved it that mess. I did however, tell her all about Sinn and what happened there.

"So you're bothered both by the terrible events and that you actually cared about a person you barely knew?" She seemed amused, but exasperated. "It's okay to care Ryan. In fact... I'd say more than anything else, it's what this city needs." She poked my nose, and then closed my eyes when they popped open again. "You're adjusting to a new place, new rules, and new struggles. You're going to stumble, you are going to fall down. Just remember to keep getting back up, and hold on to who you really are. Don't let the pain drown you in the dark."

I mean, I didn't actually get it, but it also made sense. Have you ever been there? My mind churned that advice while I drifted into a deeper relaxation. Dreams seemed to dancing before my mind's eye. I witnessed tall spires filled with gears and circuits, being struck by lightning while vines grew up to surround them. A figure of moving light kept begging me not to stop the flow of information, while thousands of folks below cried out for water and food. Landscapes drifting in a void sprouting new greenery being lovingly tended to by automatons. Another glowing figure soon shifted into A dark cloaked figure. This grim looking being screamed at me not to get involved to just give up and fade away into the night. It extolled me to embrace apathy and ignore its people, its slaves. Hmm, this part of the dream seemed different almost like when I talk to Mead...

My eyes snapped open as my pulse ratcheted up to 200 bpm. I started gasping for air. I nearly jumped off the chair. What the fuck was that?

Misty laid a hand on my head. "It's okay, it's alright. You're safe here." She whispered as if to a small child. "Where did you go? What did you see?" Misty was really good at being concerned, without it feeling weird.

I didn't say anything at first. I couldn't. Finally I managed, "Let me process it first. " I stood all the way up, sad to leave the chair, but needed to move. I started pacing. "One day all this will change. I want to help folks, but it's hard to figure out a good way to do it."

"Sure, that's the dilemma of the visionary. How many things do you have to break to get to your goal? Who pays for it all in the end? Help these people and end up hurting those people, how do you choose?" Misty was a pretty perceptive person.

I grunted, the inflection was, 'you're right.' "That's the way of it." I nodded, still moved back and forth.

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"Just remember why you want to help. Maybe that'd be your best bet." She punched my shoulder. "Vik's ready to see you now. Take care Ryan." I shot her 200 Eddies. While grinning at her.

"Thanks Misty. Wise as always." I got a chuckle for my lame efforts at humor. I did feel better though.

Time to make sure my chrome was integrating properly.

Sadly the cat wasn't in the alley. No scritch therapy today. Bummer. Vik, however, was in a good mood, he seemed upbeat and ready to have some fun. "Ryan great to see you back. How's the new eye treating you? Ready for a check-up?" I noticed his boxing gloves and workout clothes out to the side.

"The eye's great, thanks again for the quick work. You boxing again, Doc?" I was glad he had something to keep him sane. You'd never guess it by looking at him, but Vik cared deeply about people. Maybe even more than Misty. He'd just been through a fuck-ton more trauma. Still, he'd developed excellent coping skills. Everyone could stand to learn a lot from Viktor Vektor.

"Nah, one of the guys I used to coach when he was a kid, has returned to the city. We went a few rounds to celebrate his homecoming. Besides, I mentor a lot of the kids still. I'm old but I'm not done yet. " He gave a few punches. I was amused. The idea of having folks running around in the world, that could just show back up and we'd pick up where things were left off, sounded awesome to me. I hoped to have that someday. I'd never had any close friends in my old home. Lots of casual bros, but no one who had my back no matter what.

Maybe I was getting there with the Aldecaldos. Though perhaps they'd ditch me now that there's major heat attached to the association. In the end, they might just be cozying up to me because of the things I could provide, but it hadn't felt like that while I was in the camp with them.

Then there was the Doc, Vik seemed to be a genuine good dude. Sure a professional and all that, but he gave a damn. What was his secret? I could use some practical advice on how to deal with all of this mess.

Eh, couldn't hurt to ask. "Hey Doc, you been around a while. I know, that you know what it's like out there, far better than I do. How do you keep caring about folks? What keeps you sane in the face of all this crap?" I was pensive, still trying to work through everything.

"Connections, Kid. As simple, and as hard as that. You find your community, then you invest in those people and their lives. Soon enough, their victories become yours, their defeats as well. You share all that pain and all that joy and you grow together. It'll keep you grounded, like nothing else can. Too many people place value in becoming legends or making eddies, like the kid that just left. That never works for long, the city wins that fight every time. Communities can rise and fall but they tend to keep going even when everything else turns to shit." He seemed a bit embarrassed to say all of that, but that was exactly what I needed. Vik had given me the best advice for this troubled place.

I nodded, I'd understood that. something about it clicked. I had to pick my connections, and work on growing them. Then I'd a moment of insight. "Which is why gangs are such a big thing. A sense of that connection even though they are using you."

"That's about the size of it. The biggest problem is learning to pick out the best people to hang with. Your real chooms. It's a rare thing." He shook his head, remembering something from his past.

"Sorry Doc, didn't mean to drag up old problems." I didn't want to bring Vik down.

"Nah kid, we all have things we'd rather forget." Nothing seemed to phase Vik for long, which made him an excellent role model. It was comforting to know he taught kids, passing some of that unflappable-ness to the younger generations. The world could use more folks like Viktor Vector.

"Hop up on the chair and let's have a look at your chrome." He waved towards the operating chair, and I jumped up into it.

"If you don't mind, and as long as everything checks out, I'd like to get a grip." I settled back into the chair. Looking at all the monitors still told me next to nothing. I really didn't understand any of this chrome stuff yet. The odd think was, I realized my trepidation about cyberware was mostly gone. That got my mind spinning in some odd directions.

"Oh looking to improve the aim?" He seemed a bit surprised.

"No aim's good, just looking to know where it's going after. My iron's a bit more serious these days, and going to be even more so soon. I don't want to zero someone by mistake." I grimaced at the thought of killing some poor schmuck just in the wrong place at the wrong time.

"Sure, look over the list while I scan your head." He dropped the scanner until it was surrounding the top of my head.. It made me slightly dizzy for some reason. I powered through the fuzziness so I could examine the readout on the left hand monitor. Tons of options from lots of different Corps, each more expensive than the last. Though it took a few minutes, I settled on one from Bats Corp. It basically combined the feature of a ballistics coprocessor, a smart gun link, and a recoil manager all in one. It also had a better technical link to the weapon, so you would get more info, like gun part condition and other finer details on your feed. It ran me a whooping $50,000, but I had a feeling it'd be worth it.

"Oh, now that's something I don't sell a lot of. Little too pricy for most folks." Vik raised his eyebrows at me. He knew I had to scrape together cash the first time he'd chipped me, and that wasn't very long ago.

"Biz is good. Had a nice little gig out in the Badlands, with more coming down the pipe." I grinned at him. "Soon I'll be able to invest quite a bit in a community." I saw his face clouding over. "I know, I know, not that kind of investment Doc. I was joking." I laughed. He really did remind me of my Gramps.

"Well, eddies are good to have, but friends can save you when money won't buy your way out of danger." He nodded like he knew I got the message. He flipped up a device on the right side of the chair, "Stick your hand in there. The Autodoc will get the grip implanted." He gave me a shot in the right forearm, once I got my hand positioned. "How's that, feel anything?" I shook my head. He was already rolling his chair back around to look at the scanner. "Everything looks good, your neural pathways have already adapted to the circuitry. Clean connections all the way. The optic sockets report no problems and the nerve there has a good signal coming through. I'd almost say you were born to Chip in with results like this." Then he winced, he hadn't meant to say that. Now I was curious as to why that might be, but I'd already pulled him into one uncomfortable conversation today. Maybe the next time I'd look into his reaction.

"Sounds great, Doc." We waited a few minutes while the Autodoc finished working on my hand. He flipped the device back under the chair.

"Alright pull your iron and check the sync up." I whipped out my Omaha, and everything had changed. It was like it had become part of me, I could feel it like it I felt my hand. Awesome. In addition to that new sense, the ammo count was now displayed in my optics feed as well as a condition readout for the gun. A line traveled from the tip of the barrel showing the most likely trajectory, and even how it would ricochet off the sign I was aiming at. It even suggested a different line of fire to hit the sign for maximum damage.

"Worth every ennie. Thanks Doc." I said hopping back to my feet. Vik handed me another inhaler, with much the same procedure as last time. One puff now, another one every hour for five hours. I hit the first puff and a soothing mist filled my lungs.

"You're welcome, Kid. Now get out there and find your people." He waved me towards the door.

Yeah. Find my people in a world of fucked up shit. I hoped I could.