“No,” Sera said with a giggle, “There was never an event known as the ‘Bleebening of Blorb’ , what a silly thought.”
Joseph nodded to himself, satisfied. He was already pretty sure that there was no such thing, but he had just wanted to confirm that. Sera leaned back in his recliner, adjusting her wrists against her bindings. The temptation to simply remove them had been nagging at him since he decided that Sera meant no real harm… but he’d been burned by people he had trusted like that before.
Still though, if they were going to be working together for the next couple months, those bindings were going to make things inconvenient. What was he going to do when she inevitably needed to use the restroom? Was he going to wipe her himself? He nearly shuddered at the thought, no way. His gut practically screamed at him to let her go, that the ties were unneeded, but his brain reigned it in, erring caution. He had only just let her in a few hours ago, he couldn’t give her free reign… at least, not yet. He’d decide after he talked with her for a bit longer, just to see if he could spot any red flags.
“I have another question for you,” Sera began, “See, Outworlders have always been a rarity on Faenor… but you’ve all basically become myth this past century. The last one seen before you was twenty years ago now, would you know why that is?”
Joe exhaled audibly, pulling down his hood and removing his helmet. It was getting far too stuffy to keep wearing the damn thing, his head was slick with sweat. He sat down cross-legged before meeting Sera’s eyes. He didn’t say anything for a long while as The End replayed itself in his mind. Sera looked somewhat taken aback by the eye contact, again apparently reading him like a book.
“It ended.” Joe told her in a low tone, “My world ended, most of my people died.”
Sera put her bound hands over her mouth, eyes still locked on his, “Truly…?” She asked after a moment, “You aren’t joking…” She said, seeming to confirm this to herself.
“I’m not.” He said, “There used to be billions of us- not no more though. I’d reckon there’s only about a million people left alive back home… naw, half that, a quarter even.”
“Billions?” She asked, “I-I don’t know if there are even one billion on our world now… so many people died because of this event?”
“Most folk who lived called it The End, and when I got sent here things weren’t looking much better.” He explained, “The worst of it was during that first week… God I barely even remember what happened durin’ that time, it’s all a blur.” He continued, shaking his head.
“Do you know what caused this?” She asked, “Did a powerful demon invoke some sort of ritual?” She asked, “Did your Overseer punish the world for some misdeed?”
“Sometimes I wonder…” Joe said, putting a hand over his brow, “But… I don’t think He did. It felt more like a cosmic car-crash, an accident.” He explained, “It was too chaotic and random, and there were survivors. If God wanted humanity wiped out, he could have done it in a more absolute way, but that ain’t what happened. There were things from other dimensions coming out of those portals, sometimes they seemed just as confused as we were, but usually they just wanted to kill us and each other.” He paused for a long while, trying to recall the different things he had seen in that first turbulent week.
“Please, continue… unless you would rather not, I’ll understand.” She said, “Still, this explains why your kind haven’t had the presence that they used to.”
“I can’t tell ya how it happened exactly, but I know what brought the problems in. We call em’ Portal Storms.” He explained, sitting back up, “Anything can come out of one, building sized monsters, rivers of magma, entire lakes worth of water- that’s just to name a few. It wasn’t just monsters that they brought, at least in that first week. After a while, the storms seemed to get weaker, but they never left. They became a standard weather pattern, smaller in scale but still dangerous. Sure, they didn’t spit out lava quite as often or dump entire oceans on folk, but they still brought in new monsters. That’s why we could never recover, The End never stopped.”
“That’s horrible.” Sera said in a sad tone, “I’m guessing that is why you constructed Betty, yes?”
“Exactly right.” He said, “It wasn’t easy, I’ll tell ya. Took four years worth of scavenging to put her together, but she can take pretty much anything thrown at her. This is my life's work right here.” He said with a smile, glad to change the subject, “I could practically live here forever if I wanted to, save for when I gotta get food.”
“She basically is a siege engine,” Sera said, “If you have schematics, you could likely sell them and live a life of luxury.”
Joe snorted and shook his head, “Ya’ll are a bit too far behind to be replicating Betty, and even if you could there’s no way I’d share it.”
“Fair enough.” Sera replied, “Are you getting tired yet? We’re well into the night now.”
“Of course.” He told her honestly, “What about you?”
She blinked before grinning, “Ah… you aren’t aware. Elves only need around two hours of sleep a week on average, we aren’t lazy like the other races.”
Joe stared at her for a long while, trying to figure out if she was messing with him.
“Enraptured by my beauty already?” She asked, “I thought that was going to take longer.”
“You messin’ with me? Two hours?” He asked, ignoring her previous statement.
She smirked, “Not at all, but you need sleep. Shall I spend the night outside so you feel safe to rest?”
Joe frowned then, pausing for a long while before he shook his head. His temptation to undo her bindings had won out, that and he couldn’t sit right with leaving a lady out in the elements, especially when she wasn’t dressed for the weather. In fact, she didn’t even have a backpack when she’d boarded Betty. Was Gerad carrying all of their camping supplies? Well… if she only needed to sleep for two hours a week, carrying her own tent wouldn’t be all that necessary.
He shook his head, “Naw, I don’t think you’ll be a problem.” He told her, undoing the zip ties, “Just don’t touch anything without my say so, you could break something.” He told her, “Especially nothing in the cockpit.”
“Aye aye cap’n.” Sera replied, flashing a thumbs up, “So, does that mean you’re letting me stay inside as well? Even if that means you’ll be at my mercy when you rest?”
Joe hesitated before he answered, “You had me dead to rights earlier, if ya wanted me dead you coulda done it there and then, but ya didn’t.” He said, “So, I’m gonna take a risk and trust ya.”
“Why that’s so-”
“I’m sleepin’ in the cockpit and lockin’ the door.” He said, cutting her off, “It won’t be cozy but I’ve slept in worse places. You can relax on the recliner there, and there’s a couple blankets packed away in the shelf next to the T.V., if you get cold.”
“I thought I couldn’t touch anything?” She asked, raising an eyebrow.
“I just gave you permission to touch the shelf and the blankets in it,” He told her flatly, “Were you listening to a word I said earlier?”
“Oh I was, I just wanted to annoy you a tad.” She said, standing from the recliner, “Just a bit of fun before I’ll be bored for the night.”
That’s right, she wasn’t going to be sleeping at all tonight. Sera would be spending hours out here alone with nothing to do. He moved over to the entertainment center, and turned on the television. Sera trailed right behind him, squatting beside him as he rummaged through the dozens of dvd’s he had collected over the years. What would she enjoy watching? Maybe something like Lord of The Rings? Or perhaps a nature documentary, seeing as she’s an elf n’ all… She then suddenly put her chin on his shoulder, looking down at the collection of dvd’s.
Joe shrugged out of the sudden intrusion, looking back at her with brow furrowed, “Ya ever hear of personal space?” He asked her, mildly irritated.
Stolen from its rightful author, this tale is not meant to be on Amazon; report any sightings.
“Ah, sorry.” She apologized, “I’ve never had a good sense for that kind of thing, I merely wanted to look at those strange books there.”
Joe eased slightly, picking up one of the dvd cases and opening it for her to inspect, “They ain’t books, these are called discs, the things holding them are cases. They’re very fragile but they can hold video-” He paused, “I’ll tell ya about what video is tomorrow, but I was gonna play one of these for ya while I sleep, so ya won’t be bored. Just trying to pick which one to put on, ya won’t be able to understand anything that’s bein’ said, but it's better than just sittin’ there.”
“Alright…” She said, “How about… this one here?” She asked, pointing at The Thing.
Joe grimaced. “No, not that one. That might be too much for ya.” He said, shaking his head.
Her face scrunched up, apparently she was offended by what he had said, “There is nothing in this world that is too much for me.” Sera said, indignant, “I’ve seen it all.”
Joe scoffed, “This ain’t from this world, you won’t be able to deal with it.”
Sera scowled, “Play this video and I’ll prove you wrong! Go to bed right afterward and you’ll see that I’ll be just fine when you awaken.”
“I don’t think it's a good idea-”
“I think you’re scared of it,” She said, jabbing him in the chestplate with her finger, “Will hearing it in the other room keep you awake?” Sera asked, face becoming smug.
Joe sighed and shook his head, “Ya don’t get it, I’m not puttin’ that one on cause-”
“Because you’re frightened.” Sera said flatly before crossing her arms, “I am brave.”
Joe drew his lips to a fine line, “You know what? Fine.” He said, “Fine, I’ll put it on for ya. Also, this is important for you to hear, the story that’s going to play on the screen is fictional, meaning that it was played by actors, ya know, thespians.”
He didn’t want her thinking that The Thing was based on real events… then again, with Earth having succumbed to The End, shapeshifting monsters weren’t too far fetched. In fact, now that he remembered it, he had killed one such creature himself, but it hadn’t been like The Thing. Thank God for that.
“Like a play?” She asked, “I don’t see how something like that would be scary.”
“You’ll see, Ms. Brave.” He said snidely, sliding the disc into the dvd player.
He set the movie to start before retiring to the cockpit, locking the door and curling up behind the chair, falling asleep relatively easily despite the gear he still wore… however his sleep was soon interrupted by a loud knocking on the cockpit door. He sat up, wide awake and reaching for his knife, but he eased as he remembered where he was.
“Joseph, please come out here!” Sera shouted from the other side, “Please!?”
He opened the door with a groan, seeing the elf standing right outside, eyes wide and hands clutching her arms.
“Can you please sleep on the recliner, I’ll be quiet I promise.” She said in a pleading tone, “I don’t want to be alone after watching that travesty you call a play.”
“That was one of the best movies of all time.” He told her with a yawn, rubbing at his eyes, “Not a travesty at all.”
“Are all these discs like that!?” She gasped, turning her head back to the entertainment center, “These movies are all like that?”
Joe shook his head, “Naw, there are different genres of film, you just insisted on watching a horror.” He shrugged, “You shoulda watched somethin’ else.”
“Look, just sleep out here. I won’t do anything to you, I just need to have someone present.” She said, grabbing his wrist and attempting to pull him out of the cockpit.
Joe nearly laughed out loud, but controlled himself… instead letting out a snicker. Sera glared at him beneath a furrowed brow, not pleased to hear it.
“Did you watch the whole thing?” He asked her, shaking his wrist out of her grip before brushing past her.
“I did…” She said, putting both hands over her eyes, “I watched it all.”
“Why didn’t you wake me up before?” He asked, seeing the credits rolling, “I coulda changed it to somethin’ else.”
“I couldn’t look away.” She admitted, “I was fascinated as well as disgusted, I could not tear my eyes away no matter how grotesque it got.”
That made sense, she’d never seen a movie before after all. She probably equated it to magic or something like it.
“I’ll sleep on the recliner,” He told her, receiving a grateful nod in response, “But I’m gonna put on another movie to help ya detox.”
Sera paled then, and shook her head, “I don’t want to see another.”
“I don’t just got horror movies,” He said, kneeling down by the entertainment center once more, “I got all kinds of flicks, adventure, romance, action- the works. I got even more on my computer but I ain’t lettin’ you touch that.”
“As long as it isn’t another horror film, I may be alright…” She said after a moment, “But you still need to stay here.”
For all her dangerous magical abilities, Sera was kind of a pansy. It was hard not to trust her, if he was being honest with himself. She reminded him of one of his old friends from back in the day, and her bubbly demeanor and curious nature made it hard to be grumpy. His gut told him that it’d be fine to remove the armor and get some proper sleep on the recliner. If she were going to try and steal Betty, she’d have done so by now.
“I’m gonna put on a classic, it's called Lord of The Rings, it's got elves n’ other stuff in it too, not scary at all.” He said, popping the disc into the dvd player, “Classic fantasy adventure.”
“I’m in the movie?” She asked, “Sorry I mean- My people are depicted in the movie?”
“Yup.” He confirmed, “Not sure how close they are to Faenor elves, but they’re in there alright. They’re played by humans since we ain’t got no real elves, but I think they did a good job. Anyway, I’m gonna go take a shower, I’ll be out in a bit.”
“You have a shower!?” She exclaimed, excited, “I’ve heard of them, can I see it?”
“Not while I’m usin’ it.” He said, shaking his head, “There’s showers here too?”
Sera nodded, “It's another thing the dwarves tried to keep secret from the other races, but humans have figured out how to replicate it. Only human nobility seem to have access to these, but they may become more common soon, at least that is what I’ve heard. Water flows through pipes and comes out of a faucet, yes?”
“Byeah.” He replied, “Pretty much.”
“Can I see it once you’re all done?” She asked, “Or even use it myself?”
He didn’t really see any harm in it, so he agreed to the request, on one condition, “You gotta have me teach you how the water works, if ya don’t, you might make the water too cold or too hot.”
“I can boil my own water,” She told him, “You don’t need to teach me that.”
“No, listen.” He said, “There’s valves you can mess with to change how hot or cold it is, ya don’t boil the water yourself.”
This opened him up to another assault from Sera, prodding him about how that was possible. After a lengthy explanation of how water-heaters worked, he played Lord of The Rings, ditching her in the front room and readying himself for his shower. Once he was finished, he emerged, clad in his mighty white and red polka dot jammies. Sera barely noticed him step out, her eyes glued to the tv screen.
“I have been to such a place before,” She said, “But the halflings there were war-like and savage, these ones seem so… pleasant in comparison. I think I would like to meet these folk one day-” She paused, “That’s right… I forgot for a moment that these people aren’t real. Movies are a strange sort of magic.” She finished, finally turning to look at him. “Is that some kind of pajamas?”
“Byeah.” He replied, moving over to the recliner and kicking back, “Real men wear polka-dot.”
“I think it looks strange.” She said, “Almost like something a baby would wear.”
“Goodnight.” He said, ignoring the jab and shutting his eyes.
“I thought you were going to teach me how to use the shower?” She asked, “And I can’t go in there until this movie is done.”
“You can pause it with the button that looks like two lines right next to each other, and ya can play it again with the sideways triangle button.” Joe groaned, pointing to the remote, “And hot water is the red valve, and cold is blue. Ya adjust them to get yer preferred temperature and just scrub yourself down.”
“But what about-”
Joseph pretended to snore, cutting her off. She huffed, and he heard the movie pausing and her stepping into the bathroom, shutting the door behind her. Before he drifted off to sleep he heard her let out a terrified squeak, but he didn’t move to investigate. He wasn’t gonna go barging in on her and she could figure the shower out by herself. It felt oddly calming having someone else in Betty with him for a change… maybe these next couple months wouldn’t be so bad after all?