The rest of the day was spent in laughter and relaxation. In the small confines of the warm, softly lit room, everyone felt at ease. Safe.
The events of the past few days almost seemed far. In Nar’s memory, they had sort of taken a surreal, soft edge to them, as if he had truly just woken up from a nightmare.
However, if he concentrated, if he focused on any of those memories for more than a few seconds, the details began to sharpen. The sounds. The sights. The smells. He even remembered a sort of off taste in his mouth when he thought back to it. He couldn’t explain it, for he had not eaten anything that would have explained the taste. Perhaps it had been the very air, smoky, tainted and corrupt with all the pain and suffering and…
And this was when he would be jolted awake. His mind had endured enough, and already, walls and safety measures were being placed into place to safeguard him and his sanity. The memories would blur again, the taste would disappear, and the sound of cheer and laughter would come back to him, bringing him back into that safe room.
Nar would then pretend he had been paying attention, and contribute his own laughter to the mix, forced as it was.
It would never occur to him, nor any of the others for that fact, that for the most part, all their laughing was just a tad too loud, a tad too high pitched. A touch of hysteria. A touch of fear. The nightmare brood beneath the surface of their minds, and all of them, without exception, weren’t quite sure what they were even laughing about.
But laughter of any kind was better than to let the memories take over their minds. And when night came, and the lights dimmed, they continued chatting and laughing. They didn’t want the silence to come. Or sleep, and the nightmares that awaited them.
They had eaten and drank until their bodies could tolerate no more, and Mul in particular, was looking very queasy. He kept burping with a sweaty, pained look. Cen nudged him towards the toilet multiple times, but Mul always shook his head. After everything he had eaten, it would be a sin to puke any of it out.
However, rest was needed. If not of the body, which had been healed to perfection, at least of the mind and soul. After a lull in the conversation, where a single yawn had made its round across the party at least three times, Kur decided it was time to call it. Protests were raised at his decision, but he held firm.
“We need sleep,” Kur said. “I know nobody wants it, but we need to sleep. It will be rough, but it will get better. Come on, everyone, it’s time. Come on.”
And so exhorted and herded, the party turned to their original sleeping positions.
When Nar got to his place, he noticed Rel, sleeping with her back to him. He sat quietly next to her, and considered her sleeping figure.
She hadn’t joined in on the celebrations. No one had asked her to either. Other than their talk earlier, she had pretty much kept to herself.
He had no doubt whatsoever that Kur intended to keep his word. Rel would be Climbing with them. What that would look like, he still had no idea.
“Psst, Nar. Do you have a moment?”
Nar looked up and saw Tuk waving at him from a few steps away.
Nar felt his heart do a somersault, but he got up, and walked to the ring tosser.
As he arrived, he noticed Tuk heave a drawn-out breath, and an expression he had rarely seen took over Tuk's face.
“Listen, Nar,” Tuk said, with a tone that matched his face. “We’re both tired, and we both know we need to talk. Talking about this stuff makes me want to be sick, but we gave Kur the piling he needed, and deserved, so that he fully understood the consequences of what he did. And so that he wouldn’t do it again.”
Nar found himself unable to meet Tuk’s eyes, and nodded, silent, while staring at his own feet instead.
“I… You need the same.”
Again, Nar simply nodded.
“You saw what happened. You knew I was suffering,” Tuk said. “You could have said something. Anything. It would’ve helped. It would’ve helped so much. Tas would’ve never gotten so close to me had you said something.”
Tuk inhaled sharply.
“Look. I know you come from a… Bad place. I can’t imagine what it was like to grow up as an Unclean, I really can’t. I... I saw it. Of course I did. And I understand how that has made you the way you are. The way you were, when we first met. Closed off, quiet. I could barely believe you when you said you wanted to tank. I honestly didn’t think you cared enough about us," he said, rubbing the back of his neck. "I didn’t think you cared about much, to be honest. But you've proven me wrong, Nar. Again, and again. I changed my mind about you even before we left that tutorial. I understood that there was just something heavy you were carrying. Something painful. Probably even horrifying.”
Nar nodded.
Again. He anticipated what Tuk was going to say, and all he could do was nod. No words came to his mind that he thought he could speak. Regret and guilt burned his mind clean. There was nothing he could say. Only listen.
“So, being someone who knows what it feels to carry a weight like that, it was really not nice of you to just ignore me,” Tuk said. “To pretend you didn’t see my pain. I don’t know what reason you had to do it. Was it because you went through something painful and had to deal with it by yourself? Was it because you didn’t know how to talk about it? Or... Because I’m a Clean?”
Nar looked up. “No! It wasn’t like…”
Tuk raised a hand to stop him.
“I... I know it was not for a bad reason, or else, we would be having a very different talk. Whatever it is, I don’t care what your reasons were. You failed me, Nar. Not by accident, but by choice.”
Nar’s throat tightened with emotion, and he barely managed to squeeze the words through. “I’m sorry.”
Tuk sighed.
“I know you are. Look, you already do an incredible job in the party. You have risked your life for the party more than any of us have, except maybe for Gad. Or, you know, the same. Those times you saved Viy, or jumped in front of something that would’ve killed any other of us? Man, I respect you more than a pile load. Way, way more! And I don't want to be ungrateful to all that you do. I just… If anyone is in a bad spot, don’t ignore it again, ok? I know I don’t need to say it.”
“I won’t do it again,” Nar said, forcing himself to look at Tuk’s face.
The trugger’s eyes glistened in the very low light, and Nar knew that the words had been just as hard for Tuk to speak them, as it had been for him to hear them.
“I swear I won’t,” Nar said.
“I know that. Look, forgotten and forgiven. Just remember, we all have a duty to look out for each other. And that means more than just keeping us alive, as ungrateful as that sounds.”
A smile managed to escape onto Tuk’s face, and both him and Nar shared a nervous laugh.
“We’re all that we have now,” Tuk said, staring at their party. They gave the appearance of sleep, but Nar doubted anyone had found sleep that easily. “I don’t know what or who we’ll find or meet up there, but I’m starting to feel like this is it. Our families are behind us, for better or worse, and this is what we have now. And no one else is going to take care of us. Or cry over us, if we don’t make it.”
Tuk’s eyes were still locked over the party, but he saw something else now.
“Do you want to talk about it?” Nar asked. “I know it comes late. And I’m not that good at this kind of stuff, but, if you want to talk…”
Tuk squeezed his shoulder. “Thanks. But I already talked with Kur. I shouldn’t have hidden it from the party either, and Kur already gave out to me for doing it. He also helped me make sense of my feelings. Talking about things really does help. So, if one day you need to talk about anything, you can come to me too.”
“Thanks.”
“Also, don’t underestimate yourself. I know you spoke with Jul. I don’t know what you told her, but I saw what it did to her. You did good. Crystal, I sound like a team leader. Look at me, going on and on.”
Nar managed a chuckle at that.
Tuk patted his shoulder. “Look, we both need sleep, however much we’re going to get. So, I just had one more thing to tell you. It’s a warning. What happened back there… What I did. What I choose. One day, especially as a tank, you will probably have to make the same choice. Not about strangers, but about us. The party.”
“I… That’s…”
“I know. I don’t want to think about it either. But the Nexus has not been kind to us, Nar, and I’m starting to think about what’s up there waiting for us,” Tuk said, looking up towards the ceiling. “After all, if the Named Few are as powerful as we believe them to be, I’m sure they didn’t just wake up one day being like that. All our gains come with a cost. Imagine what it’s like for a Named Few. Imagine what it's like for everyone else. There is no reason to think that our lives are going to be easy when we get out. Better? Oh, yes. I have no doubt about that. Easier though? No. I… I just don’t think they will. So yeah, think about it. Prepare yourself, if you can. And when that time arrives, whatever happens, remember this: it’s not your fault, and you’ve done your best. You’ve done the best you could. You’re not the Crystal, and you can’t do everything. Well, at least that's what Kur told me, so, I figured maybe I should pass it on.”
With that said, Tuk walked away.
Behind him, he left Nar both shocked and speechless. And scared.
So far, he had been lucky. He had not had to face a situation where he had to choose who to protect, and who he was willing to let fend for themselves. Not truly. He could not deny that he had simply been lucky.
Tuk was right. It was bound to happen one day, and there would be nothing he could do about it, but make his choice then.
Unless…
Unless he made himself strong enough. Strong enough to take the third choice. That of sacrificing no one, and saving everyone.
Was it childish? Perhaps. But it gave him comfort. He wasn’t ready to tolerate the possibility of such a failure yet. Nor carry the weight of knowing that he would have to decide who died and who lived, as Tuk had been forced to do.
Crystal willing, with some mercy, that would never happen.
"Nar?"
Nar blinked and looked up. Tuk was still there, looking at him with an intese gaze.
He actually looked like he was on the verge of tears.
"Yeah?" Nar asked, frowing in concern. "What's wrong?"
Tuk looked away. "Are we still friends?"
Nar tutted and rolled his eyes. "Go to sleep, Tuk."
"I'm being serious here!"
"So am I!" Nar said. "Of course we're still friends! What kind of dumb question is that?"
Tuk's eyes glistened in the dim light. "It's not a dumb question at all... It means a lot to me."
Nar sighed. He stepped towards the trugger and gave him a sudden hug.
A case of content theft: this narrative is not rightfully on Amazon; if you spot it, report the violation.
"We're good, man," he said. "Don't worry about it."
"Thank you. I appreciate that," Tuk said, returning the gesture.
They separated, and Tuk wiped at his eyes. "It was kind of you, you know. If it had been me... I don't know if I would've been as... As... Gracious? Oh, new word. As gracious as you."
Nar shook his head. "Knowing you, you would've told everyone on the first day."
"Nah! I would've kept quiet about it too," Tuk said. "Considering what you went through, it was the safest option, man. I don't blame you one bit."
"Thanks, man. I appreciate it," Nar said, feeling a tightness returning to his throat again.
Damn it! How much more crying am I going to be doing today? he muttered to himself, trying to keep a hold of his frazzled emotions. Almost getting eaten, followed by a big chastising from and to Kur, followed by him finally opening about his Unclean past, and then Tuk's well deserved giving out... What a bunch of utterly insane days he'd had.
"Alright. Enough crying for one day," Tuk said, his thoughts clearly in tune with Nar's. "Try to sleep, alright. And if you can't, just come find me. Or anyone, really. I doubt anyone's going to have good night's sleep."
"I'll keep that in mind," Nar said. "You try and catch some sleep too, Tuk. And again, from my side, I promise I won't be quiet again."
Tuk nodded, smiling. "I know you won't, man. I know you won't."
The ring tosser gave him one last wave and walked away.
A smile shone in Nar's features as he watched the ring tosser go.
Friends with a Clean, uh?
He shook his head. He had to stop thinking of them like that, of course. But Crystal, if only his dad could seem him now.
*********
Sleep did not come to him easily that night. It had to be grabbed and dragged. Thrown down and beaten into submission.
When Nar opened his eyes, he swore that he had just finally managed to drift off into a swirl of purple nightmares. But the lights were bright, and the party was awake and going about their morning routines.
He allowed himself to lay where he was.
The thoughts and coversation from the previous night came to the forefront of his mind, and a grin split his face. Not everything was a bad memory.
Then he sighed.
Right. You're still Climbing. Can't keep grinning away like an idiot. Time to finally look into those gains. They better be as good as everyone's been saying they are. And Crystal, just how much [Aura] did all of that ended up costing me?
He grimaced. But he couldn’t avoid it any longer.
He also needed to change into his new gear, and prepare to leave the safety of that safe room. They couldn't, and wouldn't, be staying locked up in there forever.
With a swallow, he willed his UI to flicker to life, and before he could hesitate again, he focused on his notifications. The window showed up immediately.
You have seen, endured and escaped from the unforgivable.
Your path continues.
Rewards:
1. You have been granted an unlimited rest period. Cleaning and toilets are provided. Unlimited food and drink are provided. You are safe here. Stay as long as you want.
2.You have gained 5 new gear sets. Report to the dispenser to receive them. You must return all of the older sets that still remain in your possession.
3. You have been awarded three levels.
4. You have been awarded extra gains.
It didn’t come as much of a surprise. He already knew about the first and second rewards, though he was somewhat curious to know what the new gear was like.
On the other hand, a mere three levels seemed almost insulting.
Apparently, the System had thought the same, and had given him a fourth reward. Extra gains.
With his stomach convulsing uncomfortably, Nar willed the prompt away, and another took its place.
DING!
His eyes widened as he read through it.
You have leveled up!
You have leveled up!
You have leveled up!
Extra gains have been awarded!
You have gained:
Strength 15 -> 17
Constitution 18 -> 22
Stamina 21 -> 25
Agility 15 -> 18
Speed 15 -> 22
Aura* 48 -> 59 (+11 Mod.)
??? 14 -> 16
??? 18 -> 21
Might 5 -> 6
Endurance 6 -> 8
Instinct 15 -> 20
Reflex 16 -> 21
Hearing 9 -> 12
Sight 10 -> 12
NPC 0 -> 5
Gains threshold exceeded!
Stat points will be allocated during sleep!
(Stat points have already been allocated)
Attributes unlocked:
NPC
Skill [Strong Attack 2] upgraded to [Strong Attack 3].
Skill [Quickening] upgraded to [Quickening 2].
That much [Aura] was a blow.
He had been expecting the increase, but he had not expected it to be so high.
70 points. 70, uh?
Nar took a deep breath. He was still too mentally wrecked to think too much about it. Or the fact that with another 30 points, [Aura] would claim his second modifier as well.
Instead, he focused on the new attribute he had gained, and a new window popped up, smaller and overlapping the one with his gains.
Neural Processing (Combat), NPC - Your ability to process information faster. This is the (Combat) variety, commonly awakened in those whose minds need to keep up with the demands of battle, and the strain of their enhanced bodies and combat attributes. Further, [NPC] provides passive bonuses to other attributes. Currently, per point, [NPC] provides an extra 0.05 multiplier to [Reflex], an extra 0.03 multiplier to [Agility], and an extra 0.02 multiplier to [Speed]. All resulting numbers are rounded down.
Wait. What?
He frowned and re-read the explanation of his new stat. It had gone completely over his head.
Process information faster? That’s basically thinking faster! Or, wait. Is it?
He didn’t feel the invasive drip of new knowledge, so he knew he was on his own to figure it out. However, considering the bonuses it gave to [Reflex], [Agility] and [Speed], it seemed like a valid conclusion to him that [NPC] helped him think faster in the middle of combat. To see, and perhaps even sense, things faster, and process them faster? Even to react faster? To make decisions faster?
I think that's it? I’ll ask Gad’s opinion about it later.
Maybe he was interpreting it wrong, but he had a feeling that he wasn’t.
It was a pretty amazing attribute. Not only was it about to make him think much faster in the middle of a fight, it also provided significant increases to some of his most crucial attributes. [Reflex] alone gained an extra 5 points, and from the attribute description, [NPC] would probably provide better bonuses as he gained more points in it.
One thing he didn’t understand was how the new attribute worked, however. How exactly did it help him think faster? Was it just filling his brain with Source energy during fights, to boost his mental capacities? And if so, how much stamina would that cost on top of what it already cost him to use his current attributes? Plus, it looked like [NPC] was the same as his [Instinct], something passive that he, at least as of yet, had no control over. Did it mean it could drain him out of stamina?
It was all a bundle of unknowns. Another mystery attribute which, just like his [Instinct], he didn’t even begin to understand how it possibly worked.
He didn’t even have a quantifier to know how much faster it helped him process information.
I mean, I sensed danger before I got [Instinct]. But this time, I didn’t notice anything for this [NPC].
Or wait, had he?
A vague something tickled at the back of his mind. It was enough to push him to canvass the memories of his recent fights. He made sure he remained objectively focused on how he had felt when fighting though, and not on the salivating mouths, the sharp teeth and other unpleasant parts of those memories.
Eventually, he gave up. He felt like there was something there, but whatever it was, it wasn’t something he had noticed enough to remember.
He decided to put those questions aside for now, and checked his upgraded skills. That too, was a pleasant surprise.
Strong Attack 3 - an attack that does an extra n * 0.55 damage, where n is your current [Strength]. Costs 10 stamina.
Quickening 2 - for 5 seconds your [NPC], [Reflex], [Agility] and [Speed] increase by (n + y) * 0.25, where n is your [NPC] and y is your [Speed]. Costs 15 stamina.
[Strong Attack 3] was just another straightforward 0.1 increase in the damage multiplier, just like [Strong Attack 2] had been.
[Quickening 2] looked to be a much greater boost, however. He wasn’t sure how it made sense for [NPC] and [Speed] to enhance themselves, but he wasn’t going to complain. With now 22 points in [Speed] and the extra 5 from [NPC], he gained a whooping extra 6 points in all four skills!
Even the duration of the skill had been enhanced to an extra two seconds. In a fight, those two seconds could very well be all that separated him from a gruesome end to his Climb… And the skill’s cost had remained at 15 points of stamina as well!
Nar closed the tab with his skills and stared at his attributes again. His head spun.
All in all, if he ignored [Aura], his gains were insane. And even more surprisingly, they were exactly what he needed and had wanted.
It shouldn’t be surprising. After all, those gains were all just the result of his own actions and choices. No, the surprise was more that the System had actually given him such a fair, even favorable, he would’ve argued, assessment and resulting rewards. He had started expecting the worst from It.
[Aura] however, was still [Aura]. He understood where it came from now, and why he was gaining it so heavily. They had probably all racked a lot of [Aura] from crossing the Pressure barrier. Plus, they had been hammered quite heavily with it during the tutorial, and at several significant points of their journey. That, at least, finally explained one of the unknowns he had faced since leaving the plant. And it was the one that had driven him crazy the most.
The question now was what he was going to do with it.
He was going to learn how to use it to fight, obviously. There were no doubts and no arguments there. He needed to pull his own weight, and he wasn’t going to let the others carry him forward anymore.
There was a slight problem there, however. He had the nagging feeling that his advanced [Aura] was going to be a problem, not a boon.
From what he could tell, [Aura] usage did not feel good to either Tuk nor Cen, as it should. But given what he was used to back in the factory, and much more [Aura] he had now within him, or however it worked, he worried that using [Aura] would be a lot harsher on his body now. A lot more. And defintly in a very dramatic and bloody way.
But he wasn't sure of it yet. And there was no point in telling anyone about it until it was confirmed. The last thing he wanted to give the others the impression that he was trying to avoid doing his share. Or worse. If it did turn out that he couldn't use his aura with reducing himself to a bloody puddle on the floor, Kur would just insiste on Nar not using it all. And the others would all agree too. He had no doubts there either. However, he did not want that.
He would tell everyone about his 70 points of [Aura], but he would keep the rest under wraps. He didn't want preferential treatment. He wanted to be one of them. Plus, he didn’t think he could stomach it. He wanted to make his own fate, not have others sacrifice theirs for him.
If only it was [Aether]. Crystal. Everything would’ve been perfect then.
But what ifs had never made the pile any smaller, or the work any easier.
It is what it is, Nar thought, and opened his status tab.
NAR293457741235645XAV
Basic 19
Health Points: 220/220
Stamina: 250/250
Stats
● Strength: 17
● Constitution: 22
● Stamina: 25
● Agility: 18
● Speed: 22
● Aura*: 56 (+14 Mod.)
● ???: 16
● ???: 21
● Might: 6
● Endurance: 8
● Instinct: 20
● Reflex: 21
● Hearing: 12
● Sight: 12
● NPC: 5
As he had first feared after the tutorial gains, when his path had begun to shift, his movement attributes, and [Instinct] and [Reflex], had overtaken his [Strength]. They would soon do the same to his [Constitution]. However, he now looked at these changes with different eyes. With hope for the potential they reprensented.
It was his chosen path, and he would make it work. Yes, there was [Aura], and yes there were still those two [???] unknown attributes, which had both had massive gains. However, he had gained in [Might] and [Endurance] as well. ANd he had unlocked [NPC]. So, he would figure it out. Somehow. Probably with some help.
With a deep breath, he turned off his UI entirely.
Before he went over to talk with Kur, to tell him of his increased [Aura], there was just one last thing to do. Replenish his cracker and jell-o stores, and get his new gear.
When a couple minutes later he beheld the clothes in his hands, he couldn’t help but repress a shudder.
Climber’s Shirt 2
Uncommon
A superior version of the [Climber’s Shirt]. Dyed purple.
Attributes
● Absorbs 4% of damage taken when hit.
Climber’s Pants 2
Uncommon
A superior version of the [Climber’s Pants]. Dyed purple.
Attributes
● Absorbs 4% of damage taken when hit.
Climber’s Shoes 2
Uncommon
A superior version of the [Climber’s Shoes]. Dyed purple.
Attributes
● Absorbs 1.5% of damage taken when hit.
The higher damage absorption was more than welcome. The dyed purple, though? He could’ve done without. Was that the System's sick humor? An attempt to make sure he didn't forget what he had gone through and all the lessons learned from it? Or what is something else entirely, and completely beyond his comprehension?
He sighed, shaking his head.
He had never thought it possible, but here was a color he was starting to seriously dislike. He hoped to never see that brilliant, nightmarish purple ever again.