After establishing the pointers of my cooperation – not going out late at night, not getting out of sight of Wann’s, asking for permission for every little thing, sometimes reporting to Vertig and doing his little deeds; wearing the fashionable accessory they called a collar. Wann was ordered to move back to our room, which he was not happy about, so that was a win for me. And Vince was moved to the one beside ours. The boy was not pleased with the situation, even more so than I was. But such was life, and not everyone could get what they wanted. 

I understood why Wann was chosen to supervise me – Vince was partial to me, so he was out of the question. Wann, on the other hand, would have done anything to make my life a little bit harder. And believe me, he did just that. Even though no one explained to him why he needed to follow me around, he didn’t really ask for an explanation. “I knew you were a freak the moment I saw you” was a confirmation enough to know that he didn’t need a reason for anything regarding me. Also, the necklace sticking out from under my jumper was a giveaway for reasons to despise me.

Wann was grumbling about how I was being an obstacle for his everyday life and tripping me every five meters on the way to class. It was starting to get on my nerves, but saying something back would start a fight, and I was so much more tired of that. Vince had other responsibilities in a different direction from my classes, so he was not with me. Then again I had the honor of joining all of Wann’s entourage. Which, to be honest, was meager after that last attack by Viscardi. Only Sylvester and Dark was there that I knew the names of, I think four of his pals were killed off, and now there were only other two of whom I had no interest in. 

I mean, it all could have been much worse – like me being locked up in a cage, as Vince had suggested. Though it’s still very awkward being near Dark; I couldn’t even begin to imagine how she was feeling. I did reject her quite hard and then didn’t get the chance to explain it all properly to her. Then I basically forced her to hide and now I was someone being supervised. 

It’s true, I had loved a couple of times during my existence, but none of those ended well for the other side – aflame or in bloody carnage. 

Memories of Victoria surged to the surface of my mind, those called out other names and faces, and it made my heart clench in something I haven’t felt for a very long time – grief, agony, guilt, and sorrow. 

“What. The. Actual. Fuck. Freak,” was Wann’s reaction to my crying face.

Well, I didn’t want to cry as much as he didn’t want to see me cry, but it was happening and I was spilling blood tears over my pale freckled face and there was nothing I could do about it. The last thing I actually needed was a panic attack – my heart seized and I fell short of breath; my knees gave out and I fell to the freezing ground. 

The worst thing about living for an eternity was that I remembered most of the things – those screams and cries I was recalling now were tearing my brain apart. Why was this happening now? This never happened. Ever. The rare times I could remember this happening was after I encountered Victoria, Villbert, and Vianey… 

“Fang?” Dark’s voice brought me back to reality, out of those memories. “Fang, you alright?” Worry did not suit her. It distorted her pretty face and made it look a couple of decades older. 

“I- I’m good. Ju- Just a seizure,” I tried smiling at her and stood up.

“Maybe ya should go back?” Sylvester suggested and was so ready to walk me back to the dorms, so he wouldn’t need to be at the boring Latin lecture. 

“No, she shouldn’t. I am so not skipping this class,” Wann was spitting venom with every word while staring daggers at me. “She’s fine. See?”

Indeed, I was fine physically; my mentality was going haywire, and I had no idea why. 

Breathe in. Breathe out. Repeat. And repeat it while you can see in front of you clearly and not stained red. 

After I cleaned up a bit with the paper napkins Dark so kindly gave me, we walked to the classroom late. As a punishment, we all had to translate a hundred maxims into Latin. One good thing about me being a couple of millennia old – I knew Latin as the back of my hand, so this didn’t take me too long. I had to admit, though, some of the words were hard to recall; I hadn’t used the language in a long time.

The teacher wouldn’t let us out until we finished translating all of the maxims. I was done by the end of the class. Wann, on the other hand, was only half done, for some reason he was a very diligent student, wanted to do everything perfectly, so I, by the orders of Vertig and our deal, had to wait for him to be done with it. Everyone else left. Dark, too, mainly because I told her to leave. It was a mistake. She would have been a good distraction from the thoughts and memories flooding back. 

It was so strange to remember them now. I despised the times when I was somewhat happy. Smiling, laughing, loving. It was all so strange and alien to me. Simply because I did not deserve any of it. Yet, it was the things I lived through and the emotions I thought I needed. But I couldn’t have been more wrong. All it brought was death. Not to me, to them. To those I supposedly loved and cherished. And I destroyed them.

The earliest memory of my first love, if I was not confusing anything, was big bright brown eyes and thick dark brown curls.

I was trying to fry myself in the summer sun in a clearing of a forest. She was lost and stumbled up to where I was pretty much burning my flesh off. She didn’t run away screaming, she asked if I was okay… She was so silly. 

Vianey was a stupid to death kind. A simple village girl with no knowledge of the world outside her little village, but she was pure and sincere, instinctively kind and mostly ignorant to the world around her. That little silly girl wormed her way into this cold heart of mine and I even gave in to conversing with her and teaching her the truths of life. 

Her smile bought me over. Her laugh, her tears, and her loud voice when she would try to talk me out of self-harm. I was actually stupid enough to believe in happiness. 

It was one of those times when I slipped into my mindless-self and slaughtered the village she was living in, along with her. Better yet, she was smiling and swearing to love me forever while I was gutting her. 

Wann kicked my shin, his face distorted in disgust since I was crying again. 

Crying blood wasn’t the worst part of this body of mine, but it definitely was the messiest. I bloodied my coat which was one of my favorites. Wann was looking at me like, well, like he always did, with contempt, anger, disgust, and hatred. Seeing his colored eyes flash vibrantly made me remember his roots; the roots of a true born warrior, a hunter with natural instincts. And I realized he was my last hope of escaping the infinity. If he couldn’t bring me to my demise, no one ever would.

For a moment I allowed myself to drown in the shallows of his gaze – I imagined peace, relief washing over me. The ending of my suffering of each day passing and crushing me under the colossal weight of the sins I have accumulated throughout these vast centuries. I longed for a painless existence, of nothingness. And I could see that in the darkness of his eyes. They were so dark in all their brilliance, I could see the sunrise in them. Within that darkness was a light – beloved, yet so, so painful.

“You dead or something? I said, let’s go, damn it,” Wann grumbled pulling me up by my shoulder.

“I wish...”

We went out and the sun was hidden by a thick storm cloud. I was glad of that happening, but, on another hand, it meant a snowstorm coming, given the fact today the temperature was below zero and it was freezing. I never really liked snow; it was too white. 

“So what took you so long? Can it be, you suck at Latin?” I asked to try and forget about the cold eating away at my fingertips.

Wann only glared at me and hastened his pace, kicking my shin in the process. He took to that action lately, it’s how he showed his dominance over me. He should be glad I needed him for my goal, otherwise, I would have broken his neck by now. I did not like to be touched, not to mention kicked.

The moment he passed me I caught a whiff of that delicious smell of perfectly balanced blood. I was sure it was Wann’s blood that made my heart race just by a little smell wafting toward me. I reached for my bottle with a drop of blood to quench the thirst to avoid attacking Wann in the middle of the day. 

I mean, I had nothing against attacking him now, either way, he already knew I was something and not someone, so I wouldn’t be exposing myself more than I already had. And I could control myself enough as to not kill anyone. Though I would always drink to kill or the possibility of Viscardi situation happening again would rise by one hundred percent. 

To be honest, I never really wanted to fight any of Cold Walkers, after all, they were almost a family to me. They all wanted me dead, but still, they were a family of sorts…

At the corner of one eye, I noticed Vince approaching. I started smiling until Wann shoved past him with his broad shoulders and the other boy stumbled. I was at his side in a flash and growling at Wann. 

Both of them stared at me in surprise. The one most surprised by that was definitely me. I was acting all territorial, like some wolf, or let’s be honest, most supernaturals were very protective of their territory and possessions. What was weird though, was the fact I was protective of a human which I barely knew.

“Fey? Everything good?” Vince asked, concerned.

“Yeah, I just don’t like him treating you like some garbage.”

“That’s because he is,” Wann barked, and turned to leave.

“Wann, I swear, if you don’t stop this bullcrap I will beat the living shit outta you.”

“Hey, it’s all good. I’m used to it.” Vince was holding me by the shoulder, to pull me back a bit.

“How can you say that? You shouldn’t be getting used to being pushed around and looked down upon.”

“A pair of faggots being all friendly and shit. I got places to be, get a move on, Freak.”

“What do you, freaking Mutt, have to say about faggots? Aren’t you one yourself? Men, women, who else have you fucked around this place? What right do you have to call us names, when you’re no better?”

“Fey...”

Vince was getting cautious, trying in vain to pull me back and step in between me and Wann. I was clearly getting heated and I could feel Wann getting ready to fight me if need be. Vince at this point was trying to be a peacemaker, but I did not need a peacemaker at the moment, I needed to punch someone in the face, preferably Wann. 

“Or are you just denying that you’re one of us? Would your daddy be sad, if it turned out his proud son was one of those he considered to be nature’s mistakes? Would he not let you go out and play as much as you want if daddy knew that you eat ass and dick as much as pussy?”

“Fey?!” Vince gasped, blushing all the way to the ears, down to his neck.

Wann pushed Vince away and grabbed me by the collar, he got really close to my face; his eyes were raging furnaces of hatred and contempt. “What do you know about my family, you filthy… whatever you are.”

“Lost for better words, huh, Mutt?”

Wann swung his fist back to collect enough strength for impact, but he was so slow I could have fallen asleep. I could clearly see him concentrating on my jaw, targeting the juncture between the two bones. I could also see his muscles tensing under his jacket. He was emitting enough heat to boil from inside and then the fist blew out upon contact with fair skin and frail bones. 

Vince literally flew over his back and landed on his knees. Mouth bleeding, breathing labored and panicked. I watched in shock how his face bloomed in a huge bloody bruise from a broken jaw. 

Wann did not stay to apologize or do anything in this line of thought. He uttered a “his own damn fault” and left just like that. He just walked away, forgetting me, and his duty to Vertig to watch me constantly. Well, I wasn’t complaining, but this behavior was out of the ordinary for him.

Vince coughed and tried to stand up, but stumbled and lost his balance landing back on his knees. I think he was also crying, hot tears staining bloodied face. He spat out some blood and coughed again. Wiping his mouth, he winced in pain and decided to give up on cleaning up. He was trying to say something, but I could see pain shooting right through him and shutting him up effectively. 

I couldn’t do much, just help him get to his feet. Sticking myself under his arm like a crutch, I walked him back to the dorms and straight to the med bay. 

The doctor was shocked to see his face, but she wasn’t shocked to see us come in. Wann was sitting there, on one of the chairs in the room, staring us down. 

“Why are you here?”

His silence annoyed me to no end. Was he feeling guilty? That’d be a surprise if he was. I guessed, he was there to watch me, because he had to, and in the moment of rage he forgot about it. He still did not answer, so I concentrated on what the doctor was saying. 

“Your jaw was dislocated from the joint and it broke in two places. You are lucky, young man, you still have all of your teeth intact,” she tried to joke. 

“Do you, like, know how to fix him?” I demanded.

“Oh, I know you,” she smiled. “This young man over here had brought you here just recently, with your guts spilling out, that was a really worrisome wound. How is it doing?”

“Lady, can you fix him?”

“I ‘fixed’ you, didn’t I?”

“So get to it before he bleeds out!”

She looked at me with raised brows and then she just folded her arms over her flat chest. Vince was trying to talk again, but failed miserably, so he just flailed his arms to get me to chill, as I mussed.

“First of all, this is my office,” she stated. “Second of all, you cannot barge in here and tell me to ‘fix’ someone.”

She stood up and got in my face. She had to bend down really low, because, I swear to all the gods, this lady was a giant. I grit my teeth and waited for her to explode in my face, but she just smiled and returned to her seat in front of Vince.

“I’ll get to work right now, but your friend here needs to leave. I don’t particularly like her.”

“Are you kidding me? Are you a child?”

I heard a whine coming from Vince and realized it was my cue to get the hell out. She got this, she did stitch me up, after all. Though it wasn’t necessary…

“Fine.” I stood up, stared at Vince for a minute longer to make sure he wasn’t dying and then left the room. 

Wann followed me out. Shoved me to the wall hard and, once again, got into my face. He cursed but did not attempt to punch me again. I mean, he could have tried, there was no longer any interference he should have been worried about. But he just shoved me again and growled. 

“This is why I hate you. I don’t un-understand what’s going on yet, but when I f-figure out what Verting wants with you, I’ll get you.”

“Sure thing. Do that. I’ll be here.”

“I need to talk to Vertig about this.”

“No,” I spoke. “What you actually need to do is apologize. To Vince. I know, it was his own fault for posing his face right then, right there, but you could have stopped or lessened the impact. But you didn’t.”

“Shut up!” he shouted walking away.

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“Unless you can’t control this beastly strength of yours,” I mumbled and sat down to wait.

I smelled more blood and more antiseptics and other medicine behind the med bay door while waiting for anything to happen. I knew he wouldn’t die from that, he wasn’t that frail, but I just wanted to know how bad this whole situation was. I needed someone to tell me it wasn’t too bad, that he could heal properly before the convention started – he was so excited about that, he’d die if he had to miss it because of a broken jaw...

I was cracking my fingers and pacing the hall. 

Why? Why was he so adamant about this? Why did he so willingly got in the path of a bone-crushing punch? For me? I did not deserve any of this. He was suffering because of me, and I did not like it one bit. 

It was too familiar. This situation. It had happened before. Couple of times. The first time she just enchanted me with her eyes and naivety. The second one was charming and mischievous. He was smart, witty, and always knew how to make me laugh. Then I started missing him, wanting to see him, worrying about him, wanting to be there for him. Needing him in my life. The same happened with Victoria, and now the same thing was happening with Vince. 

 I certainly did not wish for the same hell to happen a fourth time. Three was supposed to be a charm, right? Why did all of them had to go and swear upon their death to love me forever? Why? I was the biggest asshole this world has seen. I only cared about myself, I didn’t like people, I killed, I sinned. My soul was as black as coal and they still found something, some white smudges that made them like me, made them LOVE me. But I still couldn’t figure out what was that small part making them give away their life for something like me. It was unfathomable, incomprehensible and simply illogical. 

“Miss Knights,” Vertig’s voice brought me back from the trance. “I’ve heard what happened. I'm not happy about it.”

“You don’t have to be happy. It’s not my fault your guard dog can’t control himself.”

“We are not talking about Mister Wann here. We are talking about your actions which lead to this situation.”

His tone made me squirm in my own skin. This person was more dangerous than Michail, and I never heard of this man before. He was no one compared to the combat instructor or to Wann’s own dad. 

“It-”

“I don’t need your excuses. I need an explanation of why you insist on getting on our bad side?”

Then I realized everything. It became clear to me – they did not want to cooperate with me, they wanted to control me. And for that, I just gave them the perfect remote control tied with a bow. 

They knew they wouldn’t be able to threaten me by injuring me or imprisoning me or harming me in any other way, but if I had a weakness, which they could use against me, they would seize it no matter what it was. In this case, it was Vince. I realized it too late. They knew I cared, even before I knew it.

“I guess, I got played,” I scoffed. “You planned all of this, somehow, involved Vince in it. And then this pawn of yours made it all happen. He provoked me.”

“Whatever do you mean?” Vertig played a fool.

I narrowed my eyes and observed both of them. Wann had this pissed expression on, but it was nothing unusual. The unusual was the cast down eyes, inspecting the floor like they were a new piece of hunting technology. Vertig, on the other hand, had this strange grin on his lips, as if mocking me, taunting me to dig my own hole deeper and deeper. He was waiting for me to slip and I was doing just that. I had to better learn to not talk in these situations because I always seemed to talk myself into more trouble.

“Miss Knights, we had an agreement, did we not? You behave, we behave – everyone’s happy. But if you keep going around making my subordinates lose their temper, I won’t be able to help your case.”

“Whatever do you mean?” I parroted.

He smirked, “I mean the method to reach your death.”

He made my skin crawl. He knew more than he was letting on and it made me impatient. I needed to know what he knew, but it wasn’t supposed to be that easy, it never was when it came to humans. 

Supernaturals were easy – they told you straight what they need and want from you. Humans, humans were sly, cunning, calculating. The worst kind to deal. And this was why they were dominating the world right now. Not because they were stronger, but because they were more twisted. I was not denouncing supernatural intelligence, but it was a simple truth – supernaturals did not like mind games. They loved the thrill from a simple game of chase, or an honest to a fault bloody carnage. Most of Cold Walkers loathed humans for this sole reason of their manipulative and cunningly obnoxious ways of achieving their goals. 

And Vertig… He was the prime example of the human supernatural creatures wanted to weed out of existence. But the fight was futile – humans were simple, yet complicated, but they never changed. One was worse than the other, the good ones weren’t as good as you first expected them to be. A human heart could change at the drop of a hat. Once pure, a heart could turn black just because of a broken promise, a simple mistake could turn over the world. All because human heart was fickle, unpredictable and insatiable. 

“Which is?” I tried.

“You would think it was that easy?” he chuckled. “I don’t think it could go that way, Miss Knights. Before I give you what you need, I will need you to do my bidding.”

He finally started to get to the point. I had to be honest, I didn't really want to hear his demands, I could guess they were nothing I would like.

“That being?”

“I need you to tell me everything you know about others like you. Their weaknesses, strengths, habits, whereabouts. Everything you can.”

“You already know enough-,”

“Don’t lie to me.” His tone made me shudder. 

I couldn’t understand what made me fear this man so much. I could just simply break his neck and all of this would be over, but something was stopping me from lashing out. 

The med bay door opened, and the doctor emerged; white coat bloodied, smelling of mixture of chemicals. She grinned eerily at me and turned her gaze to Vertig.

“Young lad is fine. It’ll take about a month for his jaw to heal, but otherwise, he’s peachy.”

“And the thing I asked?”

“Oh, I installed it where it couldn’t be removed without killing the poor lad,” she smiled while answering.

“Good.” Vertig nodded and turned to Wann. “You don’t actually need to babysit her during the day as of now. Just make sure she’s in her place before sundown.”

Wann barked out an “yessir” and marched down the hall and out the building.

“I believe I made my point?”

“You stinking bag of crap, you think you can control me? You think this collar or whatever else you have can control me? Just try me, let’s see who walks out unscathed out of this mess you are trying to create here.”

“Miss Knights, I am just asking for a bit of information for the price of Mister Bloomer’s well-being.”

“What did you do to him?” A chill ran down my back.

“Nothing much,” the nonchalant tone was driving me into a corner. He had this situation in his grasp. I was the one being cornered, with no escape out. “I just asked Doctor Merrylin here to install a little something as a precaution, that’s all. If you behave accordingly, it will all be alright and no one will get hurt.”

“Can I see him? Or is that also prohibited as of now?”

“You can, but he’s sleeping,” answered the doctor.

“I don’t care.”

I pushed the door open and bee-lined to where Vince was lying, motionless, barely breathing. He had a small cut along his left side chest, stitched cleanly. His jaw was braced and wired, the bruise was blooming larger and darker. 

It hurt me physically seeing him lie there like this. My insides were screaming in agony and I knew the history was repeating itself. He was the one who brought my colorless life a full array of a rainbow. He was the one who made my heart react to human emotion. He was the one who would also bring me to the horrors I kept on reliving over these past thousands of years. He would bring me down this time too, along with his frail fleeting life and a definite promise to never renounce the love and devotion for me. He was another like Victoria or Villbert. Another case of Vianey. 

“You asshole… You can’t be- You can’t, you hear?!”

I hated showing my weak self to others, but I couldn’t control this mushy side of myself when it came to those, those people referred to as soulmates. 

A witch was highly interested in my story once. That’s where I first heard the term. I kept noticing it in the books, in people around me. There was this undeniable invisible bond tying two souls together, transcending the bounds of time and place. And for some reason, I had this bond with this boy lying before me. I was not supposed to exist in the first place, and the existence of another soul, bound to me until the end of time seemed so cruel to me. 

I never wanted this. I never needed this either. I was fine by myself, roaming about, moving on, never staying in one place. Never aging, never reaching the end. Always stuck in this endless nightmare humans called life. And this Life decided to play a prank on me, or maybe on this poor soul, by bounding us together until I cease to exist. It meant that the poor soul was stuck in this horrendous loop. Meeting me, loving me, dying because of me, devoting themselves to me and repeating the viciously painful cycle for all of infinity. 

It was beyond me why this someone decided to make my existence like so, but there was nothing I could do about it. I was alive for more than three thousand years. I’ve seen first civilizations and cultures being built, expanding, creating communities and warring each other. I’ve seen life being given and taken. I’ve witnessed the creation and destruction of cities, the high of religion, the wars it brought. I was a witness for all of it and I was content with being only a bystander. But every once in a while there would appear a human who involved me into their daily lives, made ma a part of it. 

Vianey brought me back to her village to help me heal the burns I received from trying to burn myself in the sunlight. She hid me in her family home while I was healing. I tried to refuse, but she was strong-willed and she just dragged me back against my will. And I had no strength whatsoever to oppose it. 

I couldn’t recall where I was or what century it was, but it was before the rise of Christ. 

Her family was dubious, but she somehow convinced them I was a “good person”. They welcomed me as long as I wasn’t walking around with my flesh rotting off. 

Then it happened – someone saw Vianey forcing her bleeding hand into my mouth. 

She came to realize I wasn’t a regular human, and then she mussed she might heal me with her blood. So she did just that and was seen. The village elders caught me; I didn’t resist. I didn’t want to repeat the history of the village I was born at. 

They made a mistake of beheading me and burying me just outside the settlement. My head grew back, but I was not myself. 

It always happened when I lost my head. Every time I came back from beheading I would turn into this senseless bloodthirsty monster, with only one goal in my head – kill anything that moved and had blood flowing through their veins. My blood-lust was the strongest at those moments and I could track down the smell of blood from miles away. 

So the moment I came to I sped to the village and slaughtered every one of them – animals, cattle, men, women, children. I was ripping through her chest and she still smiled at me, blood and tears staining her beautiful face, uttering words of eternal love.

Villbert came around after over ten centuries had passed. He was a devoted Christian and a gentleman. He was trying to involve himself in the lawmaking or at least get into the fighting to get himself something greater than just nobody for a status. 

We met during one of the battles of that so-called Hundred Years War. I was just passing by their camp during the night; I was trying to get to the other side of that damned island, to get to the sea, to try and drown myself. Unknowingly I was crossing through a battlefield and was shot by a longbow arrow through my heart. I cursed under my breath and tried to stand up, then he approached me threatening to shoot me again if I didn’t stop moving. 

I removed the arrow and punched him in the face. Broke the damned longbow and was about to walk my way when he stopped me. He was intrigued by me strolling the battlefield as if it was my own backyard. He walked me to the shore and then observed my struggle to drown myself. 

He suggested to bind a rock to my feet so I would sink, but he wasn’t expecting me to actually try and do it. He tried to stop me, since I was a fair lady and whatnot. It all ended in us wrestling on the beach until he was out of breath and I was too thirsty to control my blood-lust.

When I told him I needed to sink my fangs into his flesh, he laughed and asked if a victim of Black Death would suffice. The name was not known yet as a bubonic plague pandemic outbreak was nowhere near. But he knew what was coming. He wasn’t sick, yet, but he knew. 

He was weird, offering his blood to me as if it was nothing. Not reacting upon realizing I was still walking after having my heart pierced through. 

Nearing the sunrise I had quenched my thirst and hidden in one of the caves near the shore. He was still with me, talking, making me laugh at his stupid predictions. 

I left, but I would come and find him during those years, sneaking away from the battles, talking, trying to console him, to get rid of his nightmares. 

He told me he saw his own death, but I laughed at him, telling him he was overestimating his own ability to see the future. He told me he saw himself burn as I watched. I would call out on his crap, tell him repeatedly to not be silly. I told him once to come with me, if he was so afraid of dying. He told me a fate could not be changed. 

That night I had decided to leave for the east, to explore the world some more. He told me he loved me, but couldn’t go with me. 

I never believed him, until the plague broke out, just as he predicted. The war ceased its process because of uncountable casualties. 

I roamed the settlement of ravaged battlefields, looking for his familiar smell, seeing all the piles of bodies. Burning flesh filled the air with an unbearable stench. People were in a panic, as the horror unfolded right before their eyes. 

The plague ravaged and plundered, robbing them of their loved ones. But I was sure, I would find mine fine and alive. 

I screamed my guts out when I saw his lifeless eyes pale and colorless, fire engulfing his contorted face, his flesh burning away. I jumped into the fire to try to drag him out. I was shot countless times, but I didn’t give up. I dragged his rotting body away from the crowd. Half burned, half destroyed by grief I reached the beach where we first talked and flung us both to the depths of the sea. His cold body dragged me under and the waves swallowed us. 

When I met Victoria, I was back in England. A person called Victoria, not my Victoria, was ruling the country. 

Victoria saw me roaming the streets during a rainstorm and invited me over to her abode. It was humble, reminded me of a barn. As it turned out, it was a barn. She was a handmaiden for some tavern owner. She was gentle, yet stubborn and she knew how to drink. She used to scold me for drinking because children were not supposed to drink. It was strange seeing her, a woman in early twenties, berating me, a being over two thousand years old. 

The man she worked for was a nasty old pervert. At first, he wanted nothing to do with me, he told her to kick me out, she refused. He hit her. I hit him back. Then he kicked us both out. Then I broke into his bedroom and killed him, making Victoria the next owner of the tavern. She didn’t tell me upfront, but she knew I had done something. She smiled and took care of the customers, and I helped out. 

There were nasty people all around the town. They would harass my Victoria over and over again and I would just get rid of them. Silently, leaving no evidence. 

Being near her made me do silly things, but I couldn’t just sit and let bad things happen to the one I cared about. 

Years passed with us together, people started talking. Victoria and I were making people whisper. We were not hiding our love, it wasn’t my idea, to tell the truth. She would kiss me out of the blue, in front of everyone, and laugh at their reactions. She would slap my butt and call me strange names. And I loved every moment of that. 

People, on the other hand, did not like it one bit. Our relationship was against God’s will. We were unnatural. We were freaks of nature. Then some people, still chasing the witch hunts called us out on those disappearances. They blamed us for worshiping Satan and being devil spawns. 

I wouldn’t do anything. I couldn’t move and kill all of them. They had her and I couldn’t lose her again. They tied me to a pole and readied for an execution. I was fine with it. I would be back in a day or two, depending on the weather. I was prepared to die for her if that would leave her safe and unharmed. 

They lit the fire beneath my feet, but it didn’t take fast, it flared a scorching heat, but it didn’t bother me. I was just glad she was safe. 

I miscalculated. 

As I was content with the execution, breathing in the stench of my own flesh burning, eyes closed and trying not to scream as to save Victoria from seeing me suffer, they erected another pole next to mine and tied her to it. Before I could escape the chains, they lit her on fire. 

I screamed in rage. She assured me she was okay dying for me. She told me she would love me for a lifetime and more. Her screams later filled the air and it hurt. The fire was nothing. Seeing the one I loved burn again, die again because of me was the cruelest punishment this life could have given me. Just because I was a mistake, it decided to torture me for it.

“You can’t do this to me again,” I whispered, clutching the bedsheets and pressing my forehead to his chest.

“Do what?” a raspy, muffled voice came to my ears. 

I snapped my head up and stared at his pale blue eyes, spark back in them, but still clouded by pain and medicine. 

“You can’t fall in love with me and then die.”

His blank stare made me anxious, but before I could talk again, he cleared his throat.

“Um, I’m gay.”

“I know.”

“No, I mean… I’m into guys.”

“Yeah. I get it.”

“Dude, you’re a girl.”

He repeated those same words I said when we first met face to face. It made me laugh. It startled him at first, but then he tried to laugh, too, regretting it right away.

“But yeah, I do love you.”

“You can’t. Kill that feeling right now.”

He looked at me as if I was a child demanding candy. He raised his brow and looked from corner to corner, thinking.

“It is not how that works, Fey, and you know it.”

“I don’t love you,” I uttered, blood tears spilling down my cheeks as I knelt beside his bed. 

“Keep lying to yourself, but we both know you love me,” he tried to smile wide and, again, regretted it.

I hesitated for a minute. He looked in pain, but he didn’t show any regret of shielding me from the harm. He might not have wanted to bed me, but he was completely devoted and sincere toward me. 

“Uh, do you know what a soulmate is?”

“Huh?” Vince looked confused. “It’s a person bound to another person by a soul?” He sounded so unsure of himself, for the first time his words were hesitant and wavered.

“Yeah, pretty much. Also, by the look of things, I think you are mine...”

“I am not yours. I am my own.”

“I meant – you are my soulmate, you big douche.”

“That exist? And you’re saying we are bound to each other by it?”

“Yes. Also because of it, Vertig now has a hold on me. Also, you have some kind of device inside your chest now, so they would be sure I’m not killing all of ‘em.”

“Wait, what? They what? I’m- I’m what?” He flailed his arms trying to feel at his chest. There was a tiny cut just above his left pectoral, two stitches holding the sides together. 

“Hey, chill,” I pushed him back on the bed gently and squeezed his shoulder in reassurance, but he didn’t seem to calm down. “I might have fucked everything up now, but I’ll fix this, okay?”

“How?” his voice cracked, eyes were filled with panic.

“As long as it’s reasonable enough, I can help them with it. I mean sharing information on supernaturals isn’t a big deal, after all, you all might end up dead faced with Purebloods again.”

The door slammed open and Vertig walked in, Wann right behind the man. The doctor walked in closely behind and sauntered to her chair, sitting down and getting back to some papers lying on her desk.

“I suppose, I have given you enough time. Now, let the young man rest and we can have a nice long talk.”

I grumbled standing up and wiping my face. Vince was reassuring me he was fine. I desired to believe him, but I knew, nothing from now on would be fine. I messed things up. We both did. But mostly me.

“Fine.”

I spared one last glance to Vince and followed the two out.