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Level One Chef
Ch3: A Place to Call Home

Ch3: A Place to Call Home

As I predicted, Mel wasn't happy. But she also didn't really have the right to complain. It wasn't her life's savings (or lack thereof) being thrown away on a whim. She really didn't have any stake in the whole bargain.

Except, I guess, for having to get a new shoulder to ride on. She did seem to enjoy mine.

As it was, we were able to find a buyer pretty easy. There was an adventurer's guild in Mystic Falls, and they were more than happy to buy such a lovely set of armor.

I kept the buckler and the sword for myself. The armor more than covered my needs.

Or, you know, would until I could get this place up and running.

It felt weird to have money on my character sheet. Every cent I'd ever earned went right back to Duncan and his little empire of adventurer slaves. I got mere pennies for every gold I sent his way, and it felt real bad. Real bad indeed.

But this felt great! I wanted to do this more! Having money felt like I had everything.

Shame I was going to have to spend it, though.

And my first stop after the adventurer's guild was to Phelps' dingy little office. He took my twenty gold without even a blink, and I got notification that I was now the proud (temporary) owner of 5 Monroe.

That was it. No street or road or whatever. Just Monroe.

Maybe I'd call it Monroe's Place.

Better than Harper's Eatery, which was my original plan.

Phelps was more than happy to shoo me out of his office as soon as he had my money. He told me I had to pay him on the first of every month or he'd reclaim the place. And that if I needed anything, I wasn't allowed to call on him for help. And any upgrades I made to the building would be his, provided they were permanent changes.

And then I was shoved out the door.

Standing on the side of the road, as the door closed behind me, I felt as if I'd just been absolutely taken. Just manhandled and spent upon. I felt dirty.

He at least could have bought me dinner if he was going to fuck me so hard.

I sighed and rubbed at my face.

"Well, that's step one of my master plan done," I said as Mel fluttered out of my collar once again.

"I wouldn't necessarily call it a 'master' plan."

"Good point. Magnum opus."

"Mmm, more like 'dumbass idea of cobbled together dreams'."

"Ouch," I said with a laugh. We started back towards... uh... home. Monroe's Place. Harper's Eatery. Whichever. "We do really need a plan, though."

"Oh, so you don't have one?"

"I have... an outline," I said, weakly. "It's included getting away from Duncan, finding a place to set up a restaurant, and then opening the restaurant."

"Of which you've never done and have no applicable skills for." She was using her nagging voice, but it was really hard to take her seriously when she was still so small.

I shrugged instead of teasing her about her minuscule height. "Mmm correct."

"You know I can't help you with this, right Harps?"

"I know." I sighed as the building came into view. The building menu lit up, like it wanted me to know I absolutely owned this place. You know, temporarily. Like Phelps said. "One of these days you are actually going to be able to help me with something, right? I'm not just totally screwed for sacrificing so much to help you?"

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"Pft. As if I literally don't help you all the time. What's boosting your stats there, buddy? Who's given you so much good luck you were able to get out from under Duncan's thumb long enough to crawl away?"

"I don't know if I'd call that 'good luck', Mel. I nearly died."

"Semantics." Mel stopped talking and swung around to look at the building. "You know you are absolutely screwed though, right?"

"Big time."

"Well, as long as you know. So, what's part a of the next part of the plan?"

Without answering, I entered the building. It was somehow more depressing than I remembered. It might have been because the sun was going down, or because I'd actually paid real money for this. But it looked like the physical manifestation of the word depression itself. It was one finger of whiskey and argument away from a divorce. Or maybe a half finger. It didn't look like it could afford a full one.

"Step one: we've got to get this place cleaned up."

"Oh, I'm sorry. What's this 'we' shit?"

"Are you seriously going to just sit here and watch me clean for the next three hours?"

Mel laughed, a sound like twigs against a glass pane. In a flash of light, she became a human-sized woman. Her pixie features were mostly gone - she still had pointed ears and sharp facial features, but her golden hair was a much more muted blonde and her wings had become a sheer shawl around her bare shoulders. The dress she wore was iridescent and seemed to change color whenever you looked at it.

She was stunning. Not literally. There was no debuff. But Mel cut a gorgeous figure, even surrounded by so much filth.

I found myself staring, like I always did.

Mel was unphased. Instead, she just held out a hand, ignoring my slack-jawed ogling. "C'mon Harps. Give me a handful of coins. I'll go get you some cleaning supplies and a few building materials from the market. And then you can clean this place up and give me something fun to watch in repayment for making me sleep here."

"Uh-huh," I said, not really watching as I opened my inventory and withdrew a handful of coins. I didn't even really stop to see how much there was.

"I swear, Harper, you are hopeless." She snatched the coins away and counted them. "Five? Seriously? Ugh." She deposited the coins in her own inventory and fluffed out her hair. "I bet I can make it work." She turned towards the door, then stopped and turned back. "Don't just stand there and do nothing while I'm gone, okay? Figure out an actual plan. We need to get moving on this."

"Of course," I said, shaking my head. "I'm on it."

Mel muttered something under her breath, but I didn't really hear her. Instead, I watched her leave. In a totally non-creepy way, honest.

And once the walking distraction was out the door, I focused on my task.

Figuring out what the hell to do with this place.

There was a lot that had to happen. First of all, it was way too small. I needed to expand the building.

Opening the building menu, I could see the plot of land I 'owned' was longer than it was wide. I didn't have much room to go to the sides, but I could expand out into the street quite a ways. I would be able to match the other buildings, at least, and make a nice unified front. Or I could build out only a little bit and then make the front area an outdoor eatery. It would save me on building materials, since I'd only need to do a roof and a fence there. But it would make it harder to defend.

There was also an option to build up. I had to replace the roof anyway (it was barely holding back the elements as it was) and so it wasn't a bad option, but it was one I'd need to inspect later. Maybe Mel could fly up and give me an idea of what it looked like.

And then, there was the cellar. It wasn't worth even investigating. Likely some hole someone dug to put supplies to keep them from going back too fast. But it didn't seem to have any actual foundation or walls, so the system told me I could make as many changes as I wanted.

I knew I needed a kitchen area, and a dining room area. Both had to be decently sized. I needed food storage and clean up space in the back, and tables for patrons with maybe a nice fireplace or something eventually out front. Perhaps a bar?

Mmm, maybe not a bar. That was pushing it a little. But the rest sounded just fine.

As I dug into the menus, I found a few options for prebuilts. They were way outside my cost range, and none of them fit on my lot size. But they gave me a few options and ideas, at least. The one (called a 'fancy eatery') had basically everything I wanted. And a lot of things I didn't. But it had the right vibe. I wanted people to feel like they were treating themselves when they came here. Like they could forget their mediocre lives and get something really great.

My cooking skill would get there eventually.

With the 'fancy eatery' prebuilt as a guide, I started to draw up my own plans. I used the hay-and-dirt coating on the floor as a drawing board. Even as the sunlight around me faded, I kept drawing. Instead of scratching things out, I just scuffed them over with my foot.

By the time Mel returned (not only with an armful of cleaning supplies and some other essentials, like a lit lantern, but also with dinner), I had my blueprints. Or, well, dirt prints. Look, I had an idea, okay? And that idea was that I might not have been completely screwed. Sure, it wasn't going to be easy. Or cheap. But there was enough determination left in my ex-adventurer body that I was feeling pretty good about things.

Mel's dinner consisted of some sort of poultry, a handful of rice, and a few thin beans that looked like they had been tortured with fire instead of cooked. The meal was filling, but completely unsatisfying.

I could do better than this, right?