Nothing felt the same. Nothing made sense. Everything was tasteless, and it wasn't just the food.
The weight of sadness hovered over Jack like a bird of prey with unrelenting talons, never letting go. He was forced to endure the countless meetings that Demi dragged him to. And she insisted on going out to nightclubs and taking staged photographs to fix his supposedly tarnished reputation.
When Golden came to visit, he tried to make small talk that sounded forced and irritating. He didn't come of his own accord, but at Demi's request. As a last resort, Golden attempted an enthusiastic reading of a movie script based on one of Jack's books. Jack was certain Demi put him up to it. Disgusted, Jack could only stare sadly at Golden. Sensing the tension, Golden excused himself with a fake phone call and never returned. Jack didn't see him again and didn't care.
That relentless taloned bird lay on him when Demi, ever so dutiful, tried to drag him out of bed most mornings and guided him like a robotic zombie to sit at his writing desk, but he just stared blankly, lost and unable to be found. It was the same way he looked when she brought women to the house, claiming they were sumptuous and desirable. Jack wouldn't know because he couldn't see them. His eyes were open, but all they had sight for was Sarah.
Sarah...
Sometimes when he thought of her hard enough the demons faded. So he forced his mind to see her everywhere. To keep her image and essence with him so completely that he had no more time for the hissing demons reaching for him. The nagging Demi, disgruntled about how empty his page was, still haunted him. He could not ignore her because she was real and there in his house pushing him and pushing him.
Every day that passed reaffirmed to him the fact that he didn't want this. He couldn't do any of it. He wished he could just talk to Sarah. It had been too long... But there had never been a reason to get her number or email.
He couldn't shake the feeling that she was gone from his life forever. It seemed as though her memory would slowly fade away, erased by time until she was nothing but a distant blur in his mind. It had been nearly two months since she shattered his heart in the pouring rain and left it behind as she climbed into a taxi. Each day felt like an eternity, and with each passing moment, he could feel her slipping away.
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Living like this was killing him...driving him mad. When it was just him and his soul left, he couldn't stand what he saw in the mirror. He was wilting away, evil having the upper hand again, the horns he saw taunted him.
One night, Jack stood and stared at the mirror. He saw the beast that resided within him. It had to be the reason why Sarah rejected him; all those excuses she gave were just meant to soften the blow. He was certain. The true cause of her rejection was this being inside of him, glaring back at him.
In a fit of rage, he let out a fierce roar and struck the mirror with a powerful punch, causing it to shatter into pieces. In the fragmented reflection, his face looked even more monstrous and repulsive. His fangs protruded from his mouth, his face was a demonic thing in itself.
He heard the mocking laughter around him now, loud and clear, because he had removed his focus from Sarah and dumped it on his frustration. They laughed at him, those devils, whispering in his ears their victory over him. More enraged, he hit and hit the mirror until shards were flying everywhere and he had punched out his face in the glass. That monster couldn't exist in the mirror and Jack couldn’t exist here. His life was not here. He had tried for two months, but it had all just confirmed what he had told Sarah—his life was with her. To be without her was to die.
Jack would give himself a last chance before he submitted to that slow but certain death. He would try before he succumbed.
He wrapped up his bleeding hand, and ran out of the house like he had one night months ago. Keeping Sarah the focus of his mind as he jumped into the car. They couldn’t get him when she was there. A drizzle turned into a downpour, but he did not let up on the accelerator, praying he would survive the night... Praying he would see Sarah before anything happened to him. He had the feeling that he was lucky to get away once, the second could go either way. There was no middle ground. There was no finding and losing like there was the last time. This time was strictly for keeps. He would win her back or die trying.
As Jack sped through the night, memories of Sarah flooded his mind. Her laughter echoing through Drago's, the warmth of her hand in his during their evening walks, the way her eyes lit up when she spoke of her dreams for the future. Each recollection was a dagger to his heart, a reminder of what he had lost and what he desperately needed to reclaim. The demons that had haunted him in the city seemed to fade into the background, overpowered by the intensity of his longing for Sarah and the life they could have together. He gripped the steering wheel tighter, his knuckles white with determination. This was his last chance, his final roll of the dice. If he couldn't make things right with Sarah, he knew he'd be lost forever to the darkness that had been consuming him.