Kahli focused on the third timeline, wondering what could possibly happen here that would make it advantageous to choose. Then again, Kahli didn't always choose the third timeline, in fact last time when she'd allowed Omar to lop off her hand she'd actually chosen the first timeline, but so far at this [checkpoint] she'd died in the first timeline and got her memory wiped in the second. This made Kahli feel like she would most likely pick the third timeline by default - unless it was just too horrible to bear.
[Third Scenario]
"How do you know what the anomaly is or isn't,, miss?"
Kahli looked at Agent 42 with frustration. But then, she held back. Why exactly should she tell this strange agent of F.I.N.G.E.R. (who knew what that crazy acronym meant) why she knew that it was a perforation, when he was content with denying reality to her face? How could she know whether this Agent 42 was trustworthy? She'd seen those two other timelines at this point, and she knew that if she got too far in her line of reasoning, he'd blank out her mind. What a sinister thing to be able to do to people! What kind of a [skill] was that? A small part of Kahli made a mental note to try and analyze Agent 42's system if he ever let his guard down. Maybe, if she ended up getting in a fight with him, she'd kill him and scalp that [skill]. It sure would've been powerful, wouldn't it?
Plus, what about Unit 5a23? Kahli glanced down to her unconscious robot companion. How would she get him fixed up if she allowed this Agent 42 to mess with her head?
Kahli felt backed against a wall.
"Miss?"
Kahli blinked. "What?"
"Miss, I believe I asked you a question," replied Agent 42. "I asked you why you think you know what the anomaly is or isn't. Are you going to answer my question? You've got to admit, it is a valid line of questioning. A lot of super duper messed up stuff has been happening here in downtown Gifflenberg today. And I and my team members of F.I.S.T. are here to help you and your friend with the nice hair ensure that you are safe and alive. Please don't take my question lightly, I am only asking out of concern for myself and others."
Kahli scrunched up her face, cracking the plaster covering it a little bit - however, she noticed that it cracked a little less than normal. Was her face finally starting to transition from plaster covered to living wood covered? Kahlin hoped not. She wasn't old enough for that, right? By the pincers of Theseosus, if her face was covered in living wood, she'd probably stop getting asked to provide identification when she went to purchase ale! But Kahli couldn't let this dreadful realization keep her from working her magic, because she'd just had an epiphany.
If Agent 42 was going to lie to her face and present some alternative picture of reality to what was Kahli had obviously observed and experienced, well then to hell with it. She would, too. After all, she had a [skill] that would help immensely with that - [Tale Teller]. And Agent 42 clearly didn't have the same [skill], because she hadn't been at all been convinced with the way he'd painted reality. Agent 42 had even lied about what his organization had been called. He'd originally called it F.I.N.G.E.R., hadn't he? And yet here he was calling it F.I.S.T.! There were really only two options here - either Kahli had originally misheard him, which was just preposterous, or he was lying again. Well, Kahli was going to lie her butt off to Agent 42, that much was for certain, but she'd also make sure he stopped messing with her and called his organization by its actual name. She just knew he's originally called it F.I.N.G.E.R., and she'd make sure he admitted to his trickery.
Also, hadn't Agent 42 thrown something in there about how Sahdi was Kahli's friend? Friend? Sahdi? And worse still, Agent 42 had complimented Sahdi's hair. That was... that was just a step too far. Kahli was disgusted. She had to do something about this vile, lying agent of F.I.N.G.E.R.
It was time to see how she could do. Kahli cleared her throat, and then she started.
"Okay, so, first of all, I think you misheard me there, mister Agent. I never once said I know what the anomaly is. In fact, what happened was, me and my not-friend were standing here watching the big Boner go over to the abandoned porn shop when you and your fellow agents zoomed up here in your fancy little pods and jumped out and startled us. And then you started talking about portals and perforations and anomalies, and I was so confused that I had absolutely no idea what you were talking about. See, I'd just been standing here essentially doing nothing when you cartwheeled up here, introduced yourself as an agent of F.I.N.G.E.R., and started accosting me and arguing about how I'd called some anomaly a perforation. Which, honestly, what even is a perforation? I don't even know, like, I think the last time I heard that word I was in pre-post-secondary-post-pre-afterschool! And it's been a while for me since then, you know, even though I do have a youthful glow! So, like, what is a portal? Is it something you fantasize about or something? I've never heard anybody in the world of serious science and reality talk about portals, why'd you mention a portal when you first cartwheeled up here? And with that, well, what's a perforation? And what's an anomaly? Are they all different words to describe the big beam of light? Like, I have no idea what it really is. I just know it's big, and there's light, and it's scary and I want it to go away. Isn't that why you're here? To make it go away or something? So why are you verbally accosting me about this, I don't even know, this whole terminology discrepancy? About words that I don't even know? Like, I genuinely don't even know what even of those words mean, so I don't know why you keep talking about this portal or why you keep trying to involve me in it. It's all very confusing and startling and honestly I have just had enough of your attitude. We're just here, defenseless against this big Boner that you ostensibly came here to fight off, and you're getting on to me about something? What's your problem?"
The narrative has been taken without permission. Report any sightings.
Agent 42 blinked a few times, clearly he was still trying to parse everything Kahli had said to him. Finally, he took a deep breath, and he responded.
"Honestly, miss, I have no Nomachiatoly idea what a portal is, so I must apologize thusly for bringing it up. I... I must have just misspoken, honestly. What would a portal have been? Something that takes you to another world or something? Sounds fantastical, but also just... Unrealistic, to say the least. Regardless, that's enough of that. Let's instead focus on the fact that, I assure you, the big beam of light is an anomaly. Once again, I cannot apologize enough for my tone and accustations. I haven't been having a very easy day. I swear, it's like the apocalypse just started hitting over and over again over the last week or so. It's been so much for an agent of F.I.S.T., it's been exhausting. I think I must be losing my mind. To clarify, though, I am an agent of F.I.S.T., you must have misheard me before."
Kahli balked. At least the agent had accepted most of her statement at face value, but now he was trying to fill her head with more lies, when she knew to her core that he'd said he was an agent of F.I.N.G.E.R. If only Kahli could remember what F.I.N.G.E.R. stood for, she was certain she could convince the agent to give up on his wretched lies. She racked her brains, and then she finally remembered.
"Sir, I must insist you stop trying to deceive me. I know what I heard. I know you've been flustered today, and I get it, it does seem like the world is ending or something, though I have no idea why that might be. Regardless, I can't just stand idly by and let you misrepresent reality to me. I know exactly what you said before you started talking about portals and fantasies and perforations and anomalies. You said you were Agent 42, an agent of F.I.N.G.E.R. Then, when I looked at you like you had three heads, you immediately followed up by clarifying that F.I.N.G.E.R. stands for Fighters of Imminent Negativity who Generally Ease Relations, and then I asked you what relations you were easing, and you clarified further that the relations you ease were the relations between disasters and the people experiencing them. And, to clarify again for you, I am a person experiencing disasters, so, by your own acronym, you are here to act as an agent on my behalf, and I absolutely will not accept or have any of the lies or backtalk or accusations you've been accosting me with thus far!"
Agent 42 gasped. Then, he took a deep breath, and he sighed. "You are right. Of course, how could I have deluded myself into believing my own fabricated lie when there are people like you, right before me, who have experienced and can so clearly articulate the truth? Please, forgive me. I've been a bad boy."
It was Kahli's turn to gasp as the Agent walked over to his pod, rifled through the back of it, and produced a cat of eight tales - a painful torture device covered in ropes and spikes, named after the supposed eight lives that felines were granted in Nomachiato.
"I've been a very bad boy, and I must be punished," said Agent 42. Then, he began to flog himself mercilessly, screaming out in pain and cringing with each thrash of his nasty device.
[End scenario]
Wow, Kahli thought. Then, she didn't even know what to think. That scenario had been absolutely wild.
This certainly hasn't been a boring selection of scenarios, Kahli, thought-spoke the jellyfish. Do you know which path you'll takee?
Of course she did. There was no way Kahli was going to pick the first path, because she didn't want to die. And the second timeline wasn't too tempting either - after all, who would voluntarily choose to have their memory wiped before being led into a stranger's transport pod? No, there was only one real option. She was going to have to choose the one where Agent 42 started flogging himself, and it was just as well - as far as she was concerned, the bastard deserved it.