"Did somebody say meaningless bloodshed? Because if so, I'd love to partake! Bwa hah HAH!" Lloyd grinned as he shot out his large, purple claw hand and clasped it around the two Gifflenberg officers. "Let's see how you officers sound when I squish you like insects!"
"Lloyd! Unhand those fucking officers!" Omar waved his flaming arm. "I was going to have them contact the precinct over by that fucking beam of light in the distance!"
"I don't care about your measly plans!" cackled Lloyd as he squished both officers.
[Gifflenberg officer died]
[Gifflenberg officer died]
Kahli noted that the sounds of their bones crunching was somewhat similar to the squelches that Froufrou often made, and the blood oozing from Lloyd's grasp was kind of like the green, icky slime that oozed out of Froufrou. How was Froufrou doing? Kahli looked down to check. She noted that her weird little doomsday pet seemed to be doing mighty fine in her plush handbag, and that was just as well.
"I can't fucking believe you just squished those officers!" said Omar. "Do you know how much I had to bribe them to get them in my pocket? Those were some of my goons you just fucking offed, guy!"
"Don't call me guy, guy!"
"That's it! It's time to throw down, you obnoxious fucking alien!" Omar crouched as the flame emanating from his posterior grew in strength and turpitude. His flaming arm reignited into a glowing blue flame that was twice the size of his original red flame. "Get ready to get your shit kicked in, you sick son of a bitch!"
Kahli gasped. She was grateful. It seemed that, at least for the moment, everyone had forgotten about her and her supposed causing of the resurgence of the Curr. Which didn't even make sense. Kahli hadn't even seen any Curr where she'd gone in Old Snow Mountain. Then again, did Omar realize that? Probably not... After all, she'd ostensibly been there to engage with the archives and to see firsthand what Curr sufferers experienced in the past. Of course that clearly wasn't what happened - instead, she just ended up seeing a big elephant slaughter a bunch of thieves. Yes, there was Froufrou's scroll, but if Omar wanted to play that game and bring up the scroll over and over again, well, she'd just have to remind him who incinerated and activated it.
Regardless, the fight was starting. Both Omar and Lloyd seemed incredibly confident in themselves, so much so that Kahli wasn't sure who might win. Lloyd talked a lot about how powerful he was, but Kahli had never seen his character sheet. On the other side was Omar, who almost obsessively demonstrated his power in a lackadaisical fashion. And now, with this reignited blue flame, it was clear that he was even stronger than he generally let on in day to day life. Who was going to win here?
There was a part of Kahli that wished she could participate in the fight. But to do that, she'd have to use her big rock - and in order to do that, she'd of course lose the one method she had of suspending herself in the air. She had the potential to possibly land one shot before plummeting down a few hundred feet, only to then have to do all the complicated business with decelerating her fall by summoning and kicking her rock over and over again... And that would require her to miss watching a good bit of the fight between Omar and Lloyd, which was no fun, she didn't want to miss out... Of course there was also the fact that-
"En guard, motherfucker!" Omar shot fire out of his rear end and flew towards the nasty alien, spinning his flaming arm like a pinwheel.
Lloyd just hovered there and laughed, and a moment before Omar's attack connected, the alien disappeared from view and appeared behind him.
"Nice try!" Lloyd cackled, punching Omar in the back with his big, lumpy hand.
Omar recoiled at the punch, but then he shoved his rump in the air, which caused a burst of flame to shoot up into Lloyd's alien face and send the strange little man spinning back in recoil.
"Oh my gods, that smells nasty! Like a billion rotten eggs!"
"Yea, well, there's more where that came from!" said Omar. He spun around and slashed at Lloyd with a fierce aplomb, igniting the alien in blue flame. "Take that, you sick fuck!"
The tale has been taken without authorization; if you see it on Amazon, report the incident.
"AAAGH! MY FACE! MY BEAUTIFUL FAAACEE!" cried Lloyd as he spun and twirled around in the sky like a popped blimp. Then, suddenly, he froze in mid-air and started to cackle.
"What the fuck?" Omar grimaced.
A green orb surrounded Lloyd, and it became progressively more and more opaque.
"What in the gods' many names is he doing?" asked Omar to the sky itself.
"I think he's using one of his [skills], Omar," said Unit 5a23 with a sigh. Then, the robot looked away and resumed his meditation.
Kahli frowned at Unit 5a23, thinking of the robo-man as quite a useless coward in this moment. Then, she looked back at Lloyd and gasped as she noticed that the orb surrounding the little alien main was getting bigger and bigger!
"Omar, be careful!"
"Kahli, I know what I'm doing!" spat Omar as he rushed towards the growing orb. "I'm going to fuck up this runt!"
As soon as Omar connected with the orb, everything changed. He started to wheeze and to slow his speed, almost like he was being frozen in time. His body started to glow a sickly green and the flame suspending him in air by his posterior was getting weaker and weaker.
"Omar! What's happening?" asked Kahli.
"Fuck... I don't know... It's like everything suddenly weighs... A billion pounds... Like I can't even move any more..." Omar was starting to sputter, and the flame keeping him in the air got weaker and weaker.
"Omar, keep your flame up, you're going to fall!"
"I'm going to... Keep my fucking... Flame... Up..." He looked like he'd almost fallen asleep.
"Unit 5a23, help him!"
"What?" Unit 5a23 suddenly awoke form his peaceful meditation, looking quite bewildered. "What are you requesting of me, exactly, Kahli?"
"Help Omar! He's going to fall! It'll kill him!"
"Help him? Why should I?"
Kahli was disgusted. She went on about how a robot who valued life and peace should put forth the necessary effort in order to protect others from facing death, especially when he was able to.
"Kahli, I think you're misunderstanding my specific perspective as it relates to pacifism. You see, Omar is where he is right now due to his own feisty actions. Had he not rushed up here to fight you, Kahli, he would not be at risk for falling to his death. Furthermore, had he not engaged with the alien, had he acted in a more peaceful way such as I have now, he might not even be at risk for falling to his doom regardless of the fact that he came up here to us seeking out violence. Additionally, and I cannot stress this enough, but interfering in this altercation he is having with Lloyd would only serve to insert myself into a fight that I have no rightful claim to, or skin in, if you will, though of course we're talking about figurative skin here in the case of myself."
Kahli fluttered her eyes at Unit 5a23 in a blaring rage. What was his problem? Why did he think it was reasonable to act in such a way where he continuously shot down and ignored any and all calls to action? Was he not on her side? Did he not want them to succeed? Did he really want Lloyd to destroy everyone?
"I have no true reason to believe wholeheartedly that Lloyd with indeed destroy everyone, though he is clearly quite powerful. Indeed, all I am really assured in right now is that we wants to cause harm to Omar, which is not big surprise to anyone here. I just fail to see the utility in violating my own principles because you have a deferring opinion to my own, Kahli, and that's the real kicker here. It's just ideas that we're arguing over here right now, and in fact it's starting to feel to me almost like a psychological fight, so if you don't mind, I'm going to disengage before any more senseless mental violence occurs between the two of us."
Kahli tried to argue against Unit 5a23's ridiculous response, but there was no use - the automaton resumed his meditations and began to hum in a loud, buzzing tone that got progressively louder as she attempted to talk to him, in effect drowning Kahli' voice out completely.
Resolved to make Unit 5a23 do something, Kahli kicked her big rock far away from him, and then plummeted through the air.
She'd forgotten that the method that worked oh so well on land was a little... different when she was suspended in the air. Of course, it only took a moment for Kahli to reorient herself and use the momentum of her returning big rock slamming into her big left foot to rocket her through the air towards Unit 5a23. Kahli was a little afraid of the impact, but as she watched her fist ignite in flame as it had so many times with Lloyd, she grew confident. Lloyd was a super powered alien, if she'd been able to hurt him with this attack, she'd be able to force Unit 5a23 into engaging in a fight with it, too.
Only, she never got her chance. Because the closer and closer Kahli got to the meditating automaton, the bigger Lloyd's green orb got. Suddenly, that very orb expanded and puffed out into a huge haze of sickly smoke that enveloped both herself and Unit 5a23.
"AGGH!" Kahli cried as she was suddenly finding herself much encumbered with apparently extra-strong gravity much like Omar was. She quickly foudn herself kicking off her big rock in order to stay suspended in the air, but it was terrible how much more effort it took to achieve that effect, and she noticed she too seemed to be slipping and almost sliding through the air as if it were quicksand. Unit 5a23, however, looked different.
His blue eyes shone with rage, and he was surrounded by a blue orb. His [skill], what was it, [Robo-Light], seemed to be in full force - and it somehow seemed to be protecting him from the effects of Lloyd's cloud.
"Now," said Unit 5a23, "I am ready to kick some ass."