Froufrou's distributed mucus membranes ached and her tendrils quivered and writhed as she reconstituted from a pure beam of light into the slithering, squelchy mass that she was known to be.
"Froufrou! Shit, you're back! I mean, thank the gods, you're back!" said Kahli. Well, it wasn't Kahli. It was alternative Kahli.
Froufrou was a little off-put by observing her alternative [paired] companion. That is to say that, while in some ways alternative Kahli looked to be about the same as Kahli, at the very same time she looked completely different. Different spots of her face had started hardening into living wood. She notably did not have a left hand that was made of living wood. She also just looked exhausted and sad in a cynical way that normal Kahli never did. Alternative Kahli looked like something was almost missing from her soul. Even when normal Kahli was feeling down, there was a bright spark of joy deep within her heart, and a charismatic glow behind her already quite glowing eyes that Froufrou found incredibly compelling in a tauman. Alternative Kahli had none of these sublime features. Her left foot, however, was just as big as ever - that is to say, not obnoxiously big, but indeed big enough to take note of.
Weirdly, though, alternative Kahli didn't seem to mind swearing. That wasn't to say that normal Kahli didn't swear, but she usually apologized when she did. And had she really thanked the gods? Why hadn't she said anything about Theseosus? As far as Froufrou knew, Kahli was a die hard Theseosian. At least, normal Kahli was. Whether or not alternative Kahli was apparently remained to be seen.
This was getting altogether quite strange for Froufrou, and the strangeness was only underscored by the fact that, instead of a deep blackness, the void in this alternative timeline seemed to instead be an almost blinding, bright white. Almost in step with this, the alternative Supreme Time Protector was wearing all black robes. Froufrou noted that this timeline she'd swapped into via her alternative self must've been wholly different from the timeline she pulled the alternative Supreme Time Protector out from back in the original scenario, as that alternative Supreme Time Protector had had all white robes just as the normal Supreme Time Protector did.
"Great to have you back, Froufrou," boomed the voice of the alternative Supreme Time Protector. "If that is your real name."
"W-what do you mean?" asked alternative Kahli. She seemed almost... afraid of Froufrou, or was it relieved - she kept looking away from her in awkward double takes.
"This doesn't seem like our Froufrou at all," said the alternative Supreme Time Protector. "Why, look at the way she writhes her tendrils, Kahli - it's a whole standard deviation of difference from how she normally writhes her tendrils. By Theseosus herself, Froufrou must not be Froufrou at all, but instead an alternative Froufrou from a totally different timeline. This would, of course, account for the fact in that she disappeared through that strange rift in time for a few moments. Why, perhaps what happened was that this alternative Froufrou yanked our Froufrou into her own, alternative timeline, probably through use of an [attribute] such as lineality! Then, assuredly, what must've happened is that this alternative Froufrou took our Froufrou's place, perhaps on her own will, perhaps due to our timeline's Froufrou's [Time Ripper] [skill] which allows her to tear open seams in timelines intentionally!"
"By the gods, that would be crazy!" said alternative Kahli.
Froufrou was feeling incredibly put on the spot. Here she was, stuck in a strange, alternative timeline with an alternative Kahli and an alternative Supreme Time Protector who were indeed calling her the alternative Froufrou!
"Well, alternative Froufrou?" mused the Supreme Time Protector. "What do you have to say for yourself?"
And then, it hit her. These alternative people were waiting for Froufrou to speak.
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After a long, extended argument involving the discussion of the Purple Sea actually being rather green and not purple at all - which was, admittedly, patently false both in the regular and alternative timelines - Kahli and alternative Froufrou decided to gaze down at the first scenario. Kahli still felt a lump in her throat as her [paired] companion muttered about whacking people as she hopped into her purse and complained about it being musty and cramped as if that was a bad thing - Kahli had always thought Froufrou liked things being musty and cramped, and indeed that was because non-alternative Froufrou did.
[Now viewing scenario 1]
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"Omar! You put down Froufrou this instant!" cried Kahli as she lightly kicked off her big rock.
"Oh yea?" said Omar with a sneer. "What are you going to do about it, Kahli?" He powered up his flaming arm and-
"Oh yea?" spat alternative Froufrou. "Don't you oh yea me! I'll fucking oh yea you straight to hell, guy! Why I oughta, why don't you go ahead and put that big ass flaming arm of yours right up to my purse, eh?"
"Wh-what?!" blurted Omar in shock, the flatulence suspending him in the air wavering for a moment in surprise. "Did it just fucking talk to me?"
"You bet your candy red ass I just talked to you, you fucking scrub!" hissed alternative Froufrou. "What are you going to do about it?"
"Did you just fucking turn what I said back around on me?!" said Omar, incredulous.
"Hell the fuck yes I did." Alternative Froufrou was really feeling no fear, but indeed at the same time she was feeling lots of anger. "And you better watch your fucking mouth or I'll do it again. Hell, I'll fucking back-tendril you in the face if you try and fucking whack me, you no good son of a stud!"
"I'm sorry, did you just fucking compliment my father?" Omar stuttered in shock.
"Fuck yea I did, whatcha gonna do about it?"
Omar looked to Kahli. "What is going on with this thing? It's yelling at me like nobody's business."
Kahli, feeling quite anxious, cleared her throat and started, "She-"
"Omar, why don't you stop while you're fucking ahead, before I whip out one of my iron tendrils and lop your stupid fucking head off like a godsdamned watermelon?" spat alternative Froufrou.
"I... For once, I am speechless," said Omar. He was shaking.
"Tell you what, Omar," started alternative Froufrou, "Why don't you hand me back over to Kahli, eh?"
"O-okay," said Omar as he gingerly handed the handbag to Kahli, who snatched it away in shock.
"Now, I'll tell you what to do. First of all, go ahead and switch off the flames on that left arm of yours," said alternative Froufrou.
"Alright," said Omar with a judder as he complied.
"Good. Now, I want you to raise up that left arm of yours right to your head."
Omar did so, almost automatically.
"Great, you're doing a great job, guy. Now I want you to reignited your flaming arm."
Without hesitation, Omar complied, and in that instant his head was engulfed in a burning flame. He screamed and screamed to the gods, and not soon afterwards his flaming posterior ran out of fire and he dropped through the air.
[Omar is dead]
"Heh heh heh," said alternative Froufrou. "He'll be sleeping with the water dragons now. Nobody can save him."
[End scenario]
"Froufrou, what the fuck?!" Kahli was shaking.
"Kahli!" interjected the Supreme Time Protector. "Usually you say a prayer to Theseosus or something before or after you swear."
"Well, usually I don't see Froufrou murder my mentor in cold blood!" said Kahli with a shudder.
"Because your Froufrou never had the tendrils to go through with it! Gods, I was dying to whack that fucking guy the second I sensed his physical presence! Do you mean to tell me you're upset I put down that motherfucker? Why you oughta be singing my praises!"
"What do you mean, my Froufrou?" asked Kahli in confusion.
"Eh, nothing, forget about it." Alternative Froufrou waved a dismissive tendril. "Anywho, why don't we go ahead and see that second scenario? I'm itching to fuck shit up."
Kahli swallowed air uncomfortably and looked at the Supreme Time Protector for a moment, as if beholding their countenance - which was of course completely shrouded by their white cowl - might alleviate some of her concerns regarding the behavior of her [paired] companion. But the Supreme Time Protector simply shrugged.
"Well, what are you waiting fors, Kahlizone? Let's check out that second scenario!"
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Froufrou had found herself in quite the learning experience since revealing to the alternative Supreme Time Protector and alternative Kahli that she could not speak and instead could only squelch.
At first, Froufrou was very concerned that she wouldn't be able to convince them of anything at all. After all, it made no logical sense - her squelches were indeed unintelligible, save for minute differences in tone and delivery that could be distilled to represent her initial intent.
But, so it was that Froufrou found that her access to [Tale Teller], while indeed not as robust as alternative Froufrou's, was certainly still existent. Froufrou could not rightly articulate the lie that she was not a Froufrou from another timeline, however, when she intended to squelch something out that encapsulated that meaning, she found indeed that almost at once everyone seemed to go along with it as if it were the truth. That is to say that, although Froufrou could not speak language, she found that if she tried to lie with her squelches, she was somehow able to squelch her way into convincing everyone from this alternative timeline that she was the same Froufrou that had always been there.
And so it was that Kahli started moisturizing her tendrils and referring to her as 'my liege.' Apparently, this was something that was normal and accepted for alternative Froufrou, Froufrou learnt.
But really, none of this measured up to what was really in store for them.
"Froufrou, it's been a great conversation with you, you really do have the gift of the gab," replied the alternative Supreme Time Protector.
Froufrou squelched unintelligibly as Kahli massaged the deep tissues of her tendrils.
"And ever so articulate!" replied Kahli with a bemused sigh.
Froufrou squelched.
"Ah! It's time to view the scenario!" said alternative Kahli obediently. She stopped massaging her [paired] companion and looked down at her big left foot.
[Now viewing scenario 1]