Kahli stood there, crouched in the bushes staring out over at the huge murder of tamavens swarming around the captive water dragon as it thought spoke death threats at her.
I'll peck your eyes out! I'll peck the living wood off your face and the living wood off your hand! I'll peck your butt off! I'll peck your skull open and then I'll peck your brain into a mushy smoothie! I'll travel back in time and peck each and every one of your ancestors to death, one by one - making sure to do so after they've already procreated, so that your bloodline will be stained with a past of painful peckings. And then, you'll remember them all, one by one, your memories will be forever stained with the trauma of all your relatives being peck, peck, pecked...
And that was the last thing that Kahli thought heard.
----------------------------------------
There she was, in the endless void. It would've felt exceptionally lonely there without the sinister jellyfish, save for the fact that this time, Froufrou was by her side, and she had full control of her body. Truly, it was a great feeling. Kahli didn't have to listen to any long diatribes about time and how material or not it was. All she had to do was enjoy some quality time with Froufrou.
"So, Froufrou, what do you think of that ornery little tamaven that wouldn't stop fussing at us?"
Froufrou squelched with a stinky distaste.
"Yea, that's what I thought, too, Froufrou," thought Kahli. "All hot air, that little thing. Or, hot thoughts. If that's a thing. Well, that sounds a little lewd, but that's not what I meant. You know that's not what I meant, right, Froufrou?"
Froufrou squelched in affirmative.
"Great." Kahli smiled and looked down at her big left foot. There she saw the timelines, coiling and swirling and brilliantly faded as ever. "Well, well, well. Three timelines. Here we go!"
[Now viewing scenario 1]
Kahli was sick of listening to this obnoxious bird invade her thoughts with all this nonsense! So, she decided to do the easiest thing - catch it by surprise!
She used her [Barrage of Blows] to quickly land a bunch of high-yield damage to the tamaven. Soon enough, he was coughing and hacking and looked to be on his last leg. However, at the last moment, he spun fast as a machinated top and propelled Kahli away, hitting her with bursts of poison.
[You've been poisoned]
"Ugh! Nasty little thing!"
The tamaven cackled and whirred and zoomed towards her, beak out like a spear! Froufrou leapt up from Kahli's purse and onto her face, quickly parrying the bird away but also immediately landing a harsh cut on her tentacle that caused Froufrou to release a squelch of pain and agony.
"Froufrou!" cried Kahli, although her voice was muffled by her companion animal's tendrils.
You're so fucking dead! thought spoke the tamaven as it spun around and lunged for yet another terrible attack. Before it could land its strike, Kahli summoned up a big rock and kicked it far away. What the fuck?
The tamaven paused for a moment in order to watch the rock sail away. As soon as that happened, Froufrou released a blast of [Putrify] that exploded green goo all over the tamaven.
Hey! This is covering my natural musk! None of the lady tamaven are gonna be interested in me!
"You've always smelled terrible!" shouted Kahli through the writhing of Froufrou's tentacles.
Hey, fuck you! thought the tamaven angrily. Watch this! The tamaven released a loud series of whistles.
Before much time at all had passed, a huge swarm of tamavens surrounded the bush.
You're fucking dead!
Before Kahli or Froufrou could do much at all, the birds started swarming and darting towards the bush with malice, each one chirping and hissing and screeing. Froufrou parried many of them away, but every five parries or so sustained yet another damaging cut - there were just too many birds moving too quickly to not be overwhelmed. Soon, Froufrou was reaching cooldown, and Kahli could barely see anything at all through all the birds. It was starting to feel terribly hopeless.
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And then, in came her zooming boulder! It had caught blue fire, which meant it was ready to really pack a punch. As soon as it zoomed up it slammed right into a huge section of birds, taking them out and lighting even more of them on fire.
Their chirps of devilish delight became squeals of terror as the birds were burning alive. Speaking of burning alive, so was the bush - and with that burning bush, soon, so were both Kahli and Froufrou.
It was a bit of a disappointment to them both to realize that the flame from Kahli's big rocks could cause friendly fire damage. Kahli tried to scream, but it was almost impossible as the flames incinerated over her body. Soon, they caught on strong to the living wood on her foot, then her left hand, and finally her face. It was a terrible, agonizing death that wouldn't seem to end. Kahli tried to run, tried to escape, but there were burning birds everywhere. She was trapped in a flurry, in a fiery storm.
[You died]
[End scenario]
Kahli took a deep breath of relief as she returned to the void. Froufrou squelched in discomfort.
"That was... Nightmarish. Terrible. I hope that none of these other timelines are similar, because that was emotionally draining."
Froufrou squelched in agreeance. It had taken a lot out of both of them. Froufrou was starting to wish that Kahli hadn't shared all her [skills] with her. How nice it would've been, in that moment, if Kahli had just... dealt with it herself.
Then again, Froufrou realized on thinking this that, if Kahli hadn't shared their [skills] between the two of them, that malevolent jellyfish might have succeeded in consuming her, and thusly ending the world. And Froufrou wasn't entirely certain that she was the Harbinger of Doom, but if she was, the last thing she wanted was somebody or something other than her ending the world before she got a chance to. That just wouldn't be fair, now would it? Froufrou had similar thoughts flaring up about that persnickety little fony of Taubitha's. That fony really thought it was all that, but was she? No, Froufrou didn't think she was all that at all. Not that anyone asked Froufrou, but still. That fony had the ego of a horse, hell, the ego of a pegasus.
"Well, Froufrou, are you ready for timeline number two? I know that first one was grim, but usually the second one is a little less painful. Just so you know!"
Froufrou squelched in affirmative. She'd have to agree to it at some point, she figured.
[Now viewing scenario 2]
Kahli didn't know what to do! The tamaven kept talking to her, staring her down... Then, she had an idea.
She was going to use her [Barrage of Blows], but not the version of that [skill] that dealt high damage. Instead, she'd use the [skill] to stun the tamaven and deal lots of low level damage, which would buy her some time to figure out a better plan before he went crazy and summoned up all his bloodthirsty fellow birds.
[Tamaven is stunned]
So Kahli got to work and started attacking the tamaven like nobody's business, dealing many small blows. Quickly, Froufrou released a [Putrefy] bubble that covered the stunned tamaven in goo. Kahli thought now was as good a time as ever, while the tamaven was stunned and doubly affected by their collective [skills], to summon up her big rock and kick it as far away as possible. As her rock zoomed away, the tamaven started thought speaking about how weird and stupid she was - big surprise there.
[Tamaven is stunned]
Kahli was getting low on [STM]. However, all was not lost - her big rock was on its way back! That being said, Kahli decided to step out of the bush to give herself a little bit more space between the rock's fanning flames. Soon enough, it slammed into the tamaven and shattered in a big ball of rubble and feathers.
[Tamaven is dead]
Kahli heard a terrible caw caw as the bird exploded into a ball of feathers, leaving no body behind. It was a little unsettling.
"Now, Froufrou, we've got to figure out how to handle all the birds keeping G'athoong captive," said Kahli. "We could try sneaking around and killing them off one by one, or we could try rushing in. What do you think?"
Froufrou squelched nervously.
"Yea, I agree with you, Froufrou. Let's sneak around - getting these birds angry is bad news, not only are they though, but there are so many of them that-"
[End scenario]
Kahli was irritated. That was the first time that she'd been cut off while speaking a sentence herself inside a scenario. How obnoxious. She hoped that, in the future, she'd get the option to level up her [Seismic Sense] to the point that such irritating things wouldn't take place.
Froufrou was similarly unenthused. Did the second timeline always cut off before it got interesting? Was there any point to all this? She did her best to squelch in a manner that conveyed this to Kahli.
"I know exactly how you feel," she said. "I agree that the second timeline is always really cool. Sometimes it's a let down, but if you don't die in it, it usually ends up alright. So, I'd say, if we don't like scenario three, we give it a go. I definitely like the idea of picking off birds one by one, but I also know we need to check out all the timelines first. Plus, we can also twist a timeline - so really, once we've seen all three, we need to decide if we should give it a twist, too."
Froufrou squelched in the affirmative. Clearly, they had a ways to go.
And so, Kahli looked down at her big left foot.
[Now viewing scenario 3]