I carefully step into the packhouse and softly close the door behind me.
"As part of the council of elders on the spirit realm sides, the moon goddesses Selene has approved of the notion that humans and werewolves should live in peace alongside one another. However, this is not always the case as we can see some several occasions where we have...been in contact" I pause, knowing that I have the rapt attention, look at each and every one of them with calmness I never knew I possessed but nonetheless the mask of the skill hides the barrage of nervous energy I feel. I continue.
"A young she-wolf among us has been terrorizing humans by bullying them and mistreating them unfairly." I announce, unlocking the climax of the words I had spoken prior like pulling the sheet off a cold, inactive corpse. Shocked gasps of old and aged people resound all around the room, like the echo inside a hollow deserted room, although there are some knowing looks shared among the younger ones.
"Its Adena, isn't it? That girl had always been a cruel person and a trouble maker." Dwante, one of the younger ones, asks, although he poses it more like an assumed statement than a question. I nod.
I wonder.....has she ever put any family in danger? Cause that's against basic pack laws.
Shunning is not looked down upon in the werewolf community if you so much as lay an ill hand of intent on a young wolf. Worse even still if it were a pregnant she-wolf.
"I'm taking the matter to the Alpha and Luna right now. But please, no one tell her about any of this. I don't want her to have time to be prepared for her punishment." They all nod their silent compliant to my plight.
"Our lips are sealed dearie." An old woman from the from the left far side of the room says. Her eyes, full of wrinkle lines of age and watered down pinched almond skin, hold no sense of loyalty or compassion to anyone as cruel as Adena. A deep fire burns in black eyes. They scream for justice. "No problem for you to worry about."
I smile at her, lightened from the burdensome responsibility. "Can I trust you all to do the same?" I equity excuse her for moment in my periphery gaze. Solemn nods all around me.
"You can count on it." He chirps back at me.
I nod and excuse myself.
Walking further into the dimly lit room, I walk down all the way to the heart if the hallway that houses both the Alpha and Luna's office-making sure to hide my face as I stare down at the ground and take a deep breath. Since it’s conjoined, I can talk to the Luna and the Alpha would still hear every single thing I would say.
Plus, I don’t think I’d do too well with talking to more than one person at a time. So I have to be careful what I say and how I say it.
Easy.
“Luna? May I request your audience?” I ask politely through the door, making sure my voice is loud enough but not too crude to the ears.
“You may.”
I blink. I didn’t think she’d answer that quick.
I open the door and enter, shutting the door with my other hand with a soft this against its wooden hinges before I turn fully to face her.
She’s sitting patiently, carefully watch full of my movement with her calm steely eyes, her hands placed nearly in her large desk. I gulp.
Suddenly, I’m nervous.
Is it just me or has it gotten degrees lower? No?
“I have…an issue I need to speak to you about. The both of you actually” I titter out in a nervous stream of words. She raises an eyebrow at this and I can tell that I now have her attention and her interest in the way she slightly relaxes and her expression softens.
“Go on.” Her words still come out in a short clipped tone.
This slightly weakens my confidence but I don’t let it show. Business is not merciful.
“It’s actually about Adena. She’s been bullying a person in school, a human who just recently became my friend, and makes her feel sad. Not to mention that she also terrorizes other students at school, me included. I don’t know if it’s ever gotten physical though. But I think something should be done about this.”
I hope I’m not shaking. Am I shaking?
“I see. Honey? What do you think?” She calls out to the Alpha, turning her head to the right side of my head where the other door that connects both offices is.
Confused, I turn around and almost have a heart attack then and there but again I have to conceal my expressions and keep it calm, even if that’s not how I feel. He stalks towards his wife and stands next to her, a united front and a perfect pair.
The Alpha sighs. “I guess if it’s really as serious as it sounds and I’ve never known you to be a liar Eliza, then something does have to be done about it. Perhaps urgently even.” He glances at me as he addresses me and turned his attention back to his wife.
She nods and leans back in her chair.
“We’ll talk about it and let you know our decision later.” She dismisses me as she gets ready to go back to work, her tresses falling over her face as she lowered her head.
“Actually…I um I wanted to take this to the council.” I say wiggling my toes as I wait for her response, bringing her golden-brown eyes back to mine, mentally cringing at how unsure I sound in front of them.
Hopefully, they don’t hear how my voice tips over and gets higher.
They look at each other and I kid you not, I can hear the conversation that’s going in between them with their eyes connected, blue to gold and gold to blue.
They turn back to me, one with an apprehensive expression on but determined nonetheless, and the other an unwilling cooperative agreement but with slumped shoulders resting against their chair, a frown on their elegant face.
Her response shocks me. “I don’t know….” She trails off, giving her husband a worried uneasy look, not even bothering to conceal her expressions anymore.
He shrugs. “If things don’t go well with Adena when we try, then I don’t see why not. But that is to be our last resort if the talk with her isn’t successful and her behaviour keeps up.” He answers, raising his finger up in the air as if to emphasize his point at the second half of the sentence, glancing at me with half a worried look.
He throws a cautious glance at her but she still looks very upset and mildly angrily muttering underneath her breath slouched in her chair.
I choose to ignore it.
This is more than I'd hoped for. I feel stunned.
“Thank you.” I say in surprise and inwardly gulp, turning my expectant eyes to the Alpha.
He sighs and rubs his face. I clear my throat while feeling poorly horrible for what im about to ask of him but the second he removes his hands from his face I instantly regret it and consider getting him a vacation instead.
His eyes look so tired, so worn out by the stress and repeatedly dull by it all.
And I’m guessing that the problems Adena keeps causing aren’t making matters easier for him or the Luna. I wish I could hug him, we are family friends anyway.
But, ever such a stickler to the rules, I don’t move an inch from my spot. Business is business and should remain so.
Straightening my slight posture, I open my mouth to speak.
“I was wondering…could I speak to James real quick?” I ask, well, more like beg with how softly polite my tone is. He smiles silently and I take it is almost as convincing as my lies but his eyes still lay flat.
“Sure. You two haven’t seen each other in a while anyway.”
I almost kick myself for the next stressful question I ask him and trust me, I would if I could. “Are you sure that’s okay? I wouldn’t want to intrude…..” I trail off worriedly when I catch a glimpse of the Luna who is now glowering at the table, mouth in a disapproving frown which I’m beginning to think is permanent. I look back at the Alpha.
“Of course it won’t be a problem.” He waves off my worries kindly.
The relief that instantly fills me makes me feel guilty for the stress I’ve just added to his plate.
What right do I have to ask more than I what I came for from him?
He opens his mouth but then closes it, a strange look of consent and resignation resting on his face as he stares at me, shaking his head as if to shake the thought out of existence. I let out a quiet sigh of relief, shoulders visibly letting go of their tension.
I was starting to think he knew. But that’s impossible.
And besides, he doesn’t.
He doesn’t though, right?
I mean how could he? I have kept it from everyone for the last ten years, my best friends included(and they’re practically my sisters!) so there’s no way that he could know
I look at him and, in my conflicted mind, I decided that I have indeed overstayed my welcome.
“Thank you for allowing to attend your attention. I’ll take my leave now.” I announce brightly, a convincing smile to accompany my words dash out of the room completely unprofessionally.
The narrative has been stolen; if detected on Amazon, report the infringement.
Once I’m where I can panic, I let out a loud groan as my head falls into my hands.
Shit. Shitshitshitshitshit. Shit.
Shit. I shouldn’t have run out like that or lost my composure like that in the first place.
Now they’re going to know somethings up and ask questions.
‘But shouldn’t they though? I mean, you never know, they won’t accuse of lying as you fear.’ Fern asks gently.
I shake my head but then sigh tears filling up in my eyes.‘ I don’t know. I’m just scared and tired and frustrated with it all.’ I wipe fallen tears carefully, my hands are soft on my eyelids.
She says nothing for a few seconds. ‘It’s okay. You can tell them when and if you want to. I won’t push you to do that.’
I smile at her. ‘Thank you, Ferine.’
She groans, the sound reverberating through our mindlink. ‘I told you I don’t like that nickname.’
I snort.
‘Fine, I’ll just think of another nickname.’ I finally concede to the demands of my wolf. She huffs playfully, putting her nose in the air. ‘Good. As you should peasant.’
I openly laugh at this and start walking towards his room feeling like I could actually face him without panicking and chickening out even before I reach his door.
Nearing the door though, the worries start to pour in and I start to have second thoughts.
What if he suddenly decides that he doesn’t want a plaything to manipulate and scare anymore and strangles me?
What if he cuts my body into pieces and sends it to my family?
Stop it.
You’ll only make yourself panic over nothing, I try to tell myself but it does next to nothing to ease my worries and fears of the monster behind that door.
I try to believe those words though, more so for my sake than anyone else's, I really do, but I can’t stop the way my hands are troubling, jittering in time with the rapid palpitations of my heartbeat, only softly colliding with the cold steel metal of the doorknob.
I let out a deep breath and open the door, creaking as it wood ground against wood, I grimace in pain at the sound. I look up and meet eyes with the monster.
“So, what brings you here? Here to threaten me again?” He asks, dropping his book and phone carefully on his bed, slightly straightening up and turning into his side to face me. He laughs, a deep throaty maniacal sound, and I involuntary shiver.
I clench my hands. “No, I just came to request something from you. A favour, if you will.” I plead of him, an act I begrudge to ever admit to anyone outside if this room, hating the weakness in my voice, clam up and wait for his response.
Although that’s highly unlikely, I add in my head.
He raises an eyebrow at this and languidly folds his arms across his chest. “And why do you think I would do that? Or anything for you?” The question peeves me off-not to mention the tone, but we can’t say I didn’t expect it- but I can’t deny that he’s right.
I almost laugh at myself for being stupid enough to think he’d help me or anyone but himself.
I mean, who am I right? Just the Delta and the link between the spirit and the human world.
No one important as far as he’s concerned. Not unless he wants something from me anyway.
But does that mean I’m going to give up? Even though I was trying so hard not to make my shaking visible? Hell no.
“I just thought you’d want to help me keep an eye on Adena and I don’t know, somehow warn me if she was about to cross paths with us in school.” I maintain steady eye contact with him, even though I'd rather have hidden under my bed right now and never come out, but I stand my ground. My chest heaves up and down as I take a breath in and exhale it out.
He raises an eyebrow in intrigue. “Us? You and who?”
“Me and daisy,” I answer shortly. He hums and I have to stop myself from recoiling back as a slow smile coils its way around his lips. The hum, I think I’ve headed this tune a few times, that’s normally of a nursery rhyme that children sing withhapoy grains, is now almost clinically sinister
“So you want me to protect you and your friend from my sister? And what do I get in return?” I open my mouth to protest, even though I don’t think I will, but then promptly shut it.
I mean what can I say?
No, you can’t ask to have a favour from me after you’ve fulfilled mine?
That’s how favours work. I can’t say no, much as I want to.
I sigh. “Whatever you want.” I keep my voice levelled so he won’t hear the resentment or the burning urge to refuse his demands, as valid as they are. I clench my hands. If only id known what he’d ask next I would worded my answer better fit for my peace of mind.
Imagine I’m going through all this trouble just for one person that I’ve only half known for a day. The heart is weird like that.
He doesn’t see this, a new feature of his ever noticing mind that I’m ever so grateful for, and instead leans back into the headboard with his long limbs folding over his top half. I don’t like being made to feel afraid. But knowing Jim, he’ll somehow accomplish that and make feel like I’ve gone four years back in time, back at square one.
“What about your position? What if I said I want that?” He inquires with a mischievous light in his eyes that twinkles in the depth of an ocean in his black eyes. I shift my feet close to the door, each step quiet as my heartbeat.
I frown. “You know I can’t do that, even if I wanted to. Every position in the pack is based on the colour and strength of your wolf. You know that.” I refute his baffling question with a fair and balanced explanation so as not to awaken the monster hiding in the dark.
He folds his arms, pale milky skin that pushes out from beneath, as uncontrollable as their owner, his strong arms, of whose strength and heavy push down I know well, and slightly leans back. I left my hand to rub at the scar at the back of my neck right under my nape, wincing a bit at the tender healing skin that meets my probing curious finger. It was weeks ago but it still feels like it happened a few days ago. I shake my head to rid myself of the vile memories of pain, and remove my hand from the squishy darkening scar.
He suggests, “Your connection to the spirit world then.” His empty tone does nothing to betray his tyrannical condition although I see a little light pass through his eyes. Sometimes I wonder if he has ever felt anything in his life. I can hardly tell heads or tails of what emotion I just saw, that I’m now thinking was a figment of my imagination. Because how could it be?
What was it that I just saw? Was it just a trick of the light? Or am I going insane?
Isn’t imaging things that aren’t there a sure sign of insanity?
My jaw almost drops to the floor, incredulous laughter bubbles up in my throat, threatening to come out. I clamp my hands over my mouth and tear my eyes away that come to a rest on the floor.
He can’t be serious, can he? That request he just made -I don’t think I can get my head around it-is absurd. How can he even suggest such a thing when he knows that not exactly possible?
I mean if I can’t give him my position in the pack, what makes him think I can give him this? Even if I wanted to, which really I'd have to be mad, that’s impossible.
“I-I can’t do that. Sorry.” I tell him with a quick look in his direction, offering what I hope to be a convincing apologetic expression on my face.
“Hm, didn’t think so anyway.”
I wait for him to say more, fingers itching to grab the door handle and leave.
“What do you think you can give me in return then?” He questions as he means forward and slowly clasps his hands together underneath his chin, sunlight peaking in through the half-open window, its rays highlighting half his face.
I fold my arms protectively around me. “Um, I don’t know. I could get your patents to let you lead the next pack meeting if you’d like?” I suggest hesitantly, shrugging my shoulders as I raise my head up to meet his eyes, which strikingly look sharper in the sunlight than before.
Is it the lighting or is it just my imagination?
He thinks for a few seconds, scrunching up his nose deep in thought, his eyebrows pulling up into a thoughtful arch. “I actually do like that suggestion. Huh. I guess you do actually have sine bright ideas.” He expresses gratitude in surprise, his eyebrows raised, even if the third part of his sentence condescends my thinking abilities. His tone is so airy and light that you’d be too blinded by it not to acknowledge his words.
But he doesn’t fool me. And neither does his innocent smile. I bet you he’s thinking how to make me look and feel like I’ve done something wrong by disagreeing right as we speak.
I bite my tongue and nod even as the anger courses through my veins, firing up my blood. “So is that a deal? You’ll help me?” I ask with a sceptical look cast at him, making sure to my time just as light with every little bit of effort left in me.
He frowns distractedly and leans back into the darkness again, all traces of light gone from his face. “I don’t know…. How am I so sure that you won’t backstab me? For all I know, you could just as well feed lies to my patents about me.”
I purse my lips and count my breathing in time with the heartbeat that follows.
“I won’t.” I answer shortly in a clipped tone, my eyes holding into his firmly.” I can’t promise that they’ll agree to it but I can promise that I will follow through with my end of the deal.” I say passive-aggressively his absurd claims about my person.
I fume silently.
How dare he accuse me of such things? I’m not a user and I’m sure as hell not someone who won’t keep to their words. Betraying people who’ve helped me just isn’t my thing.
Even if the possibility crossed my mind, I wouldn’t backstab anyone, especially if it’s someone I don’t like because I don’t see any reason to do so.
Unless of course, they start shit with me first.
Then and only then, is it fair to backstab and retaliate.
But I won’t do that, even though he’s done way more than his fair share of mistreatment, even if I so badly want to. I just don’t think I have the nerve to do so.
Besides he’s the alpha of the pack. Well, not yet anyway, but you get my point. I just hope he doesn’t end up being my mate.
And a deal's a deal. So no turning back now.
He taps his cheek with his pointer finger as he looks at me, looking just a little bit more convinced. I stand still, although my thoughts churn like milk being made into butter, the continuous turning making a glisten of sweat to slicken my forehead. What’s he planning?
“Hm, okay. Deal.”
A huge weight feels like its being lifted off my shoulders, even though they still slightly tense up. There is ominous intent, even if I don’t know what it us, I know it’s there.
Wriggling into view and disappearing soon after in his eyes.
This feels suffocating, especially in the way his eyes hold malicious intent, but gives no more information than that, no matter how hard I search and try to decipher it, and suddenly I struggle to swallow. I lick my lips.
“I-Thank you.” I force out in what I hope to be a polite appreciative tone. I can’t let my emotions get the best of me now. I won’t let him get me riled up like that anymore.
I start to make my way towards the door, freedom so close in plain sight, thinking that all conversation had ended and I could leave, but he calls out my name, a little bit hesitantly might I add, before I can open the door. My hand stills on the doorknob.
"Yes?" I answer but don't make any move to turn around to properly face him as I should, my hand gripping the cold steel as my hold slowly tightens on it.
"How long do I have to do this?" He questions, his voice coming out in loud thumps to my eardrums as my eyes widen in surprise. Did
I hadn't even thought of that.
Hell, I hadn't even thought he'd agree to do me this one favour even after all my pushing. The Alpha's words come back to haunt me.
"You two haven't seen each other in a while anyway."
My grip tightens more. " Just till Adena backs off of Daisy."
He doesn't respond instantly and I wait with bated breath for what he has to say to that.
I bite my lip in expectancy, my heart softly pounding in my chest.
But what comes out of his mouth next shocks me so that I almost lost my balance, slightly swaying, wobbling really, from side to side.
"Okay. I don't mind." He announces so casually as if he were struggling as well as he said those words that my eardrums wouldn’t pick up anything strange coming from someone else but sounding so foreign, alien almost, coming from him without a hint of emotion in them. Shivers crawl down my spine.
Does he even have any emotions? I briefly wonder as I take a quick look at him before I forcefully and, unsurprisingly, hurriedly twist the doorknob, soft air brushing past my face at the swift unexpected shift, a much-welcomed event, and close the door roughly with trembly, almost slippery fingers.
I breathe in heavily through my nostrils, my shoulders tensed in fight or flight mode as my heartbeat speeds up, and back up into the wall that is furthest away from his room.
Taking in a deep breath, I place my hand above my chest, as if to memorize the way my panicked heart beats, in an attempt to soothe quickly soothe its unstable palpitation against my ribcage as if in a bid to get out of its restrictive cage, plainly firm on achieving its goal.
My hands, which were supposed to be my one steady anchor, vibrate at an unusual frequency that was almost inhumane in its odd existence along with my heartbeat. I struggle to swallow spit down my dry throat
Inhale and exhale.
A strangled out choke comes out of my larynx instead as I try to attempt the one way I know how to calm down as if I'm choking on something stuck in my throat.
My vision blurs in and out of focus as my tears spill out of my tear ducts, staining my cheeks with illogical emotions, as my heartbeat steadily thumps louder, not more than a soft noise in the background.
My hands cushion my face as it lands softly into its warmth as little whimpers escape from my lips. Whimpers spill out of my mouth in reckless abandon, too selfish to stop but too restless to go anywhere else, as I get lost in my little panic attack and mental breakdown when footsteps penetrate my eardrums.